Disclaimer: I don't own them, the fox people do.
Author's Note: Possible one shot. I just have a lot of angst concerning Seth and Summer. I hope you guys like.
Her cheeks were wet with tears. She tried to sit up, tried to blink them away, but she knew it was futile. They would just fall again, and there was nothing she could do to stop them. Summer had always prided herself on being strong willed. Despite her beauty and popularity, she had always known that she was intelligent, and reveled in it even though it was something no one else chose to see. She sat up and exhaled slowly, catching her breath, and wiping the tears from her eyes.
"I must look like a mess," She muttered, reaching for her makeup bag, which was just slightly out of reach from the bed. "God dammit!" She exclaimed, biting her lip and trying to stretch her limbs just a little farther.
"Well, Summer, if I had known that I would be getting such a welcome I would've come sooner." Summer froze, her entire body tensing. She straightened, and wiped her eyes furiously, hoping against hope that her mascara hadn't run. She didn't need him to know that she'd been crying over him.
"Cohen, what are you doing here?" She mumbled, turning to face him, but unable to look into his eyes. "Shouldn't you be out…reading a comic book or something?" Inwardly, she groaned. What a fantastic come back. Cohen-1, her-0.
"Well," He mumbled, his sneakers scuffing on the floor. She looked up at him quickly, and almost grinned. He was in typical Cohen mode; his fists balled up in the pockets of his sweatshirt, stretching it out, his hair a disheveled mess. "I came…I came to tell you something." He finished lamely, and this time she did grin, grateful for once for the lack of natural light in her bedroom. Thank God, she'd dimmed the lights.
"Something? Well, this should be interesting." She grabbed her make-up bag effortlessly, and turned her back to him again, quickly applying foundation and concealer beneath her eyes. "So what did-" She'd turned again, only to realize that he was closer than she'd thought. "Personal space, Cohen? Ever heard of it? Geez." She inched away as slowly as polite etiquette dictated, but couldn't escape the scent of him. She closed her eyes for a moment, enjoying his warmth, and presence. Just being near him made her body come alive. His hands came to cup her face, and her eyes flew open. "Cohen, what are you doing? We talked about this-" His finger to her lips cut of her words, and though her face had contorted in shock and anger, her eyes told a different story.
"Shh." He whispered, sitting them down on the bed, his other hand supporting her back. Summer was angry, he could tell, but he needed to let this out. He couldn't let her go, couldn't let her leave without telling her how he felt. Tears had begun to form in her eyes, and even as she furiously blinked them away, Seth softly wiped them away with his finger. "Why are you crying, Sum?" He asked softly, but she shook her head, averting her eyes. He sighed, his shoulders stooping, but didn't make a move to leave. His head dipped, and leaned ever so slightly against hers. She didn't encourage it, but didn't protest either, her anxiety melting away, content in the moment just to be near him. Finally, she exhaled slowly, and extricated herself from his almost embrace. She laughed at the irony of it all.
"Cohen, why are you here?" She asked. Her voice was neither harsh nor demanding, and by appearance it was a simple question, but Summer knew it was more than that. Seth stood, biting his lip so hard that it bled, and ruffled a hand through his hair. He swallowed.
"Because I never stopped." For a silent moment, he looked shocked that such a simple statement could sum up his entire existence. Summer stared at him incredulously.
"You never stopped? You never stopped what, Cohen? God you just don't get it do you?" She turned angrily, her hands shaking, and grabbed her water bottle from the bedside table. She turned to face him again, and was surprised by the big, goofy grin that graced his lips. "Why do you look so damn happy, Cohen?" She turned and grabbed a bottle of water from the bedside table, mostly to get away from him, and somehow break the spell that he always seemed to cast over her. "You have that crazy ax murderer grin on your face. You're not going to kill me just because I yelled at you are you? Because if you are, at least let me get the good stuff out first." She turned back again, her fists raised, and Seth couldn't help but grinning wider. It wasn't every day that the answers were handed to him on a silver platter, for the first time in months, he felt happy. Secure. Now all he had to do was convince Summer.
"When I…ran away," Summer sighed and averted her eyes, but Seth caught her chin, and forced her to look at him. "You have to hear this, Sum. I didn't only go because Ryan had." Her eyes darted up to his, and her teeth bit her lip of their own accord. "I was so fucking scared that my entire life would fall apart. Ryan was my only friend, Sum. With him gone, I didn't know who I was anymore. And I was so scared that I was gonna lose you, that I left. I couldn't handle the prospect of losing you, so…" His voice lowered, and he looked away, his lips set in a harsh line. "So I left you." Summer gasped, and pushed his hands away, standing over him, pounding his shoulders repeatedly, the tears that had welled in her eyes finally spilling down her cheeks.
"What about me, Seth?" She asked in a voice so lost and broken, that Seth wanted to wrap his arms around her and hold her to him. "My comic book nerd of a boyfriend up and leaves me, for a guy? My comic book nerd of a boyfriend I might add, who had never been constant in the past? God, Cohen, you claimed to love me for years, but the second some new, hot, perfect for you chick showed up you headed for the hills. Ryan left so it was Ok for you leave me?" Her voice cracked, and she had to look away, because a fresh batch of tears came tumbling down her cheeks. "Was I not enough? Was me loving you not enough?" Seth turned to face her, and their eyes locked. "God, just get out of here, would you, Cohen? I won't tell Zach you were here, and you don't have to not make your declarations." She stood, and walked to the door, holding it open for him, and there was a dead look in her eyes. A sort of finality Seth had never seen before.
"Summer, wait. Before you kick me out, and hate me for the rest of your life, just hear me out, would you?" She crossed her arms in front of her chest and sighed. She should've said no. She should've slammed the door in his face and been done with him. But she couldn't. The look in his eyes stopped her.
"Whatever, Cohen." She muttered walking back into the bedroom, and sitting on the bed. He smiled again, and she bit her lip. The things that smile did to her stomach…
"Everything you said about me…you're right, Sum." He shrugged his shoulders, and bit his lip. "But I love you. I love you more than anything. And so you might think that you're just a conquest or a contest or a joke, but you're not. Not to me." He stopped for a moment, and resolve settled on his features. "So I want you to go to Tuscany with Zach." Whatever Summer had been expecting, it hadn't been that, and her mouth dropped open in shock. "He can take better care of you then I ever could. He loves you. He doesn't make you want to scream or…" His voice trailed off. "Or cry. And I obviously do. I don't deserve you, Sum. But I love you. And I have a feeling I always will." He smiled grimly and turned to leave. "I just want you to be happy." With those words he left closing the door behind him, and Summer exhaled slowly. She nodded, trying to convince herself that it was for the best. But after long moments left alone with her thoughts she sprung up, running after him. She threw open the bedroom door, and crashed headfirst into him.
"Cohen, she exclaimed, throwing her arms around him. "Cohen, you can't leave." Seth looked down at her, surprised.
"Wha?" He started, but she cut him off, and dragged him back into the bedroom, slamming the door behind him. She pushed him on the bed, and her hands came to rest on her hips.
"Sometimes Cohen, I hate you. If you hadn't come back, I could've moved on. I could love Zach." Seth nodded and sighed, "But you were first, Cohen." She shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly, but the world was reflected in her eyes. "I told Zach I couldn't go to Tuscany with him earlier, Cohen. And when he asked me if it was because of you, I lied. Yet again. To the one whose supposed to be my boyfriend. I can't go to Tuscany with him because…I love you, Cohen."