New story Can you guys help me with the title… and if I should continue…?
*Prologue*
I sat in my office, doing loads of paper work from my last mission, reminiscing about high school. I don't know why I do this to myself. I try to forget about it. My days at Gallagher were the best, and the worst. I met what I thought was the love of my life, and defeated the COC. The head of the group? Mr. I Thought I Loved You and You Loved Me but Look How Well All That Worked Out's mom. Oh, I know I should stop ragging on him. Maybe he still loved me? Where ever he was? Hah. Who was I kidding? He probably has a one night stand every weekend. Probably tells them he loves them to, and that he will never leave them, ever. But, he will not keep that promise. He will leave for a mission the next morning. A mission that you had no idea he was going on. You, thinking you love him, check up on him constantly, only to find out that he is connecting with no one in the United States but Jonas, but he has to talk to him, so the CIA knows he's still alive. You will find out eventually that he succeeded that mission. You will wonder why on Earth he is not at your apartment, full of hotness and apologies. Then, two weeks later, while you are browsing the CIA database and you will not find his name there. You will freak out and call one of your best friends, Liz, to find out whether he is dead or not. Because, not matter what you tell yourself, you still care for him. She will then tell you that he has joined the M16. Your life will continue on. You know that he most likely will never come back. He left. He left you.
Of course, while I was telling you that story, all those times I said you, I meant me. I lived that. I probably wasn't the most fun person to be around those few months. I barely talked to anyone; I worked out constantly, and barely ate. But hey, I was a girl grieving. Once I realized that he was in the M16 and was never going to want me again, I mean, who would want me when there is a bunch of fancy British spies? Not Zach, that's for sure. Zach is always going for what is new and in style. I guess pavement artists went out of style. I haven't had a boyfriend since him. The only guys who look at me are the sleazes at the club my best friends force me to go to once a month for a 'Girl's Night Out', personally, I would rather be kicking some assassin booty. But, ya know, if the shoe fits, wear it.
My best friends, Macey, Bex, and Liz, had said that if I wouldn't eat and wouldn't stop working out that they would put me in the CIA Mental Facility. Let me tell you, that is not a place you want to be. The people who are admitted into the CIA Mental Facility are people who have been locked up in some terrorist cell for years and have no idea how to react in normal society any more. Out of all the people in this world, those people scare me most. I think I'm mostly scared that someday, I might be like them. That is one of my greatest fears. You can't really be scared of much as a spy. But when you have seen people in that situation, reality hits you. I have been lucky enough to have never been compromised or seriously hurt on a mission. Also, that none of my close friends have. I've lived through it before, with my dad, never again do I want to do it again.
So, in the end, I started eating regularly, and didn't work out as much like a good little spy who follows her friends' rules. They were my saviors. They pulled me out of the deep, dark hole I was in and cured my cuts. But, with cuts, you get scars. Scars sometimes have to be surgically removed. I didn't get my scars removed, in other words, I didn't sleep with every guy I saw. That would have only covered them up. What would really remove the scars is if they were never formed. But, a time machine hasn't been created. Even if it had, I doubt there was anything I could do to change it, other than never meeting him.
Today I come off as a totally normal person. I live in my high-rise apartment in New York and I go to my office every day. When I go on 'trips' I put my mail on hold. If you don't know what I mean by trips, I suggest you stop reading pretty dang quick, because you do not understand the premise of my life. I actually don't think of Zachary Goode very much either. I'll admit, I'm pretty dang proud of myself. Zach was such a huge part of my life for so long, I didn't know how to function without him, he was my rock. But now, I'm my own rock.