Warning: This contains self-harm, and strong language, this is not advisable to read if you are a young audience.
Fairy Tail One-shot
Disclaimer: I only own this story
Gone
There was nothing that could fuck you up more then losing one of your own, and when you have put your life on the line multiple times to save them, god has a way to throw it back in your face. When you stop someone from dying, in a sense, you are playing god, and could this be his sick way of getting back at me? For what had I really done wrong?
I longed to run my fingers through her hair made of spun silver, to feel the individual piece of every hair. I long for the late night talks and making dinner for my family, I longed for her ... her presence.
Her body. Even that was gone, sucked away to where ever it went, it had left no closure. There was no body to put in the ground.
Gone, she was gone.
I had forgotten how fragile this world was, how quickly life could be snuffed out. And to have that reminder right in front of your eyes. I pressed another cut to my arm, longer this time. I did it slowly, I never rushed the blade down my arm, allowing small beads of blood to appear.
"Let's go home Elf-niichan…."
Her last words to Elfman, right before … her death. His guilt, I could imagine his guilt ... If only I could snatch it away from him!
The force should have killed her on impact, but somehow, miraculously, she pulled through even for a few moments. She was able to stay with me.
I had held her in my arms, screaming at her to live.
But all she did was smile, she wasn't angry or upset. For a reason no one could explain, her body began to fade away, eating her up, depriving her of a chance to stay in our world. No one knows what it was, or where it took her, but it had begun to ebb away at her piece by piece.
Latching onto her, I was determined not to hand her over to death, to leave her alone. If she felt pain she didn't say it.
"Mira," She gasped "It's all right." She choked out, blood running down her lip.
"No! It's not all right! You need to stay here, with your family! You can't leave!" I sobbed into her chest; I felt an arm go around my head. It was Lisanna's I knew without looking.
This was our last hug, her fingers combing through my hair.
"Mira, tell-"She stopped, choking on her words, blood spluttering out of her mouth, down her chin. She was being pulled somewhere dark, and I wouldn't let her go!
"Lisanna!" I pulled her onto my lap, a small futile attempt.
The sight of her before me fogged any logic I could think of, my mind believed if I kept her as close as i could, it couldn't suck her away. She wouldn't rise into the sky.
She would survive, I knew she would. She was a fighter; she was too pure and kind for her to be taken from this world.
"Tell Elf-niichan, that I love him, I don't hate him. And I will always be with you … here." Her hand pressed over my heart, I cried harder into her chest. Her head was in my lap, so I was leaning over her. All she could see was me.
Where was Elfman?
"Lisanna! You have to fight it! Don't give in!" I screamed, she only looked at me with her big open eyes full of terror. Tears pooled at the bottom of them, running down her cheeks. But she was smiling, she was smiling to the bitter end.
Something she always said: Smile to the bitter end.
I pushed the blade back to my skin, the memory burned itself into my mind, behind my eyelids for every time I closed them. T
A little deeper this time. In anger, frustration.
She was gone, I couldn't bring her back. There wasn't even a body. I done it quicker this time, along my wrist, fast and short cuts, made out of anger and frustration. Slowly getting deeper each time.
It was one of those moments when you weren't subjected to the pain, but you knew it would come, just later. But the internal pain in my could never be mimicked, it stayed with you at all moments of the day, awake or asleep. A monster that consumed you.
"I love you!" Half her body had gone and flown away in gold dust. Where was Elfman! I ran my hand through her hair, fast and quick. Trying to be soothing.
"I love you I love you I love you!" I said in a fast pace, trying to be as comforting as I could. I would never get to feel her hair again, how smooth it was beneath my fingers. It was like all my senses had been heightened. The softness of her skin on my fingers, the smoothness of her hair, the velvet of her dress. The scent of incense and lemon from her skin, now mixed with blood and sweat.
This is not how a young life should be taken away.
"It's okay, I know. P-please don't forget me!" She gasped, trying to push air into her lungs. Only her head, shoulder and part of her chest was left.
"I will never forget you! Not ever, no one will forget you!"
"I'm leaving, M-Mira! Don't let me go! I don't want to go!" She cracked. Desperation in her voice, she wanted to live! She didn't want to die, she was fighting it! That was what Fairy Tail mages do, we fight. We fight to the bitter end.
And then, she was gone. The silver had swallowed her up, the light blew high in the air. Out of my reach, and soon, out of my sight. That was all of her, all of her was gone. And never be in this world again, there was no body to bury. No remnants left of her.
I let out a scream, a scream of pain. The screaming would never help me to describe my emotions, anger will never fill the hole inside of me.
It was a space within, that could never be filled, and it was too high and wide. Unending, infinite.
But she was a fighter, and so was I, and so was Elfman. We would survive this and remember her to her to our last days.
We had an agreement that we would live out a full life in her memory. And that's what I will do.
I put down the razor. Looking down at my arm in displeasure, a part of me was detached, void and untouchable. I will not let myself sink this low again, I will fight to the bitter end, and never let this darkness consume me as I will live a life to the end.