A/N I reread this and felt ashamed, so I'm fixing it, same plot, but rewritten.
I Don't Cry
Waking up is always hard, realizing that you have to get up and face the world, with all of its many shortcomings. Understanding that you can't just turn back into sleep's comforting, ignorant embrace. As if this morbid phenomenon wasn't enough, waking up means you remember things that you had forgotten while you slept, normally unfortunate things, because this world isn't your friend, it never has been. You remember things that make you want to break down and cry until there's nothing left in your eyes to let out, but life doesn't work that way, and neither do you.
When all that you want to do is crawl in a hole and never come out, to hide from all you're problems, when you feel the water gathering in the corners of your unpuked chocolate brown eyes, and you're completely, positively, one hundred percent sure that the world is against you. When all the despair you've ever felt is present in that pretty little head of yours, and the pain is just too much to bear, that is when you act.
You quit feeling sorry for yourself (because really, where is that going to get you?), you get back on your feet (no matter how long it takes you), and you face whatever has got you down head on, no matter how much it hurts. You dust yourself off and keep walking. You ignore the pain, because it's just a message, whether that message is about a crippling broken bone, or the white hot agony of a broken heart, you ignore it, you keep walking.
You never give up, not now, not ever. You keep going until you find whatever it was that broke you and you kick its ass, hard. Or, in this case, you kick his ass until he begs for mercy, then you tell him just how much you love him. You explain to him that he ever tries to turn your world grey again, that you will hunt him down like a dog, or maybe a bird would be more appropriate for your simile, or is it a metaphor, you can never remember which is which.
You don't cry though, you never cry. It doesn't matter if you're broken beyond repair, or dying on the inside, crying is for weaklings who can't face the world. You've gotten pretty good at facing the world. Screaming, crying, and dying on the inside, whatever, it doesn't matter, because on the outside you're just fine, because you are Maximum Ride, and you won't cry 'til you see him again.
No one is unbreakable or invulnerable, but you're pretty damn close. Twenty years is a long time not to shed a tear, hopefully it won't take that long to find him, but even if it does, you'll make it anyway. Why? Because you are the incredible, indestructible Maximum Ride, and you don't ever cry.