Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach or Ichigo and Rukia or Renji. I wish I did, because if I were the supreme ruler of bleach, I would have atleast made them closer then best friends. I do admit that romance would fit in with Bleach, romance belongs to Inuyasha and other animes….

And another note, I of course did not make the If I were the rain poem. I had found it on some fanfic. I would like to thank Bleach that inspired me to make my first fanfic. I would also like to thank the author of Deeper Care, and Death butterflies. Those fanfics rock if anyone want to check them out, and helped me develope this fanfic. I will upload more chapters as soon as I get reviews!

Rain, Rain Go Away:
The Will Of heart

We are drawn to each other
Like droplets of water
Like the planets, we repulse each other
Like magnets
Like the colors of our skin

A petite Raven-haired Shinigami to be sat restless at her seat. Class had ended more than an hour ago. Her eyes glazed over as she looked outside the window of her classroom. The setting sun's rays filtered throughout the room. The atmosphere was thick with silence. She slowly got up from her seat. She gathered her books and made her way into the halls of the Shinigami School. She received special looks from students she had walked past. When she looked at them they pretended to not have even seen her and talk amongst themselves. She sighed, and pretended to let it show it didn't bother her. The tension in the air did not last when Rukia received a sharp kick in the butt by a familiar Red haired Shinigami student. "Hello Rukia!" He wore the same devilish smirk whenever he kicked her like that. Rukia, bewildered as she was yelled at him. "What the he hell was that for!!!" Rukia gave him a cold glare as she always did, as much to his amusement. This was how the two communicated and got along with each other. It had always been that way. He ignored her comment with a sniff. "What's with that look? Don't tell me you still can't fit in yet?!" He rolled his eyes. Rukia's eyes shifted to her feet and tried on her best face for him. She hated when he saw her like this. "Forget it Renji…why don't you tell me why you are so excited? Don't lie, because you know I can tell when you are!"

Renji's scowl of disbelief at Rukia was replaced by a proud grin. "My class is going on a special assignment to the real world." Rukia gaped dumbfounded and jealous. "No way, why is your class going and mine not?" Renji made it clear that he was glad to have an opportunity like this that the noble Kuchiki Rukia did not get. As close as they were, Renji had felt the two had grown apart because ever since she was adopted, the tension between them was obvious. He saw Rukia's face had fallen momentarily. "Because our teachers believe we are ready." He paused to stand a little bit taller. Rukia had a rare smile on her face after the shock had faded away. "I'm glad for you Renji…" Renji grunted unsatisfied on how Rukia was definitely not acting herself. "Just please be ok." Renji made a scowl before he left Rukia alone.

Ichigo looked grudgingly outside his window in his room. The rain was taunting ichigo, its droplets drawing Ichigo into a greater pain and darkness. The sun had long hid itself, the sky now a dismal gray color. He heard his mother cry out to Ichigo as he dashed down the slope to save that girl. After he knew he accomplished nothing, he felt his mother grab his leg and looked down to see she was not moving. Ichigo yanked at his mother in desperation to leave but he realized as a cold arm gripped at his heart his mother would no longer smile at him in the way that she would. She had the kind of smile that brightened his spirits no matter what mood he was in; he would never see her laugh whenever Ichigo and his father tried to impress her. "damnit!" This is no time to think about her. A voice in his head told him otherwise, contradicting his question, when is there a time to remember; do you want to forget it was your fault she died? Ichigo slammed his fist in frustration on his desk. His cursing to himself was interrupted by a squeak outside his door. "Onii-chan? Are you ok?" Yuzu outside was making awkward circles with her feet. Her older brother now 15 had been acting distant and depressed all day. Of course, it was hard to tell with that permanent scowl on his face, she knew he would never show his agony and sadness to anyone. He had too much pride to let that happen, but also with a tear in her eye, she knew he would never want to see either her or Karin see him cry because he only wanted them to be happy. She figured that since it was his birthday he would light up a bit. Her question was responded by a grunt and a blunt ok from her brother. Yuzu knew to not argue with Ichigo, as that would only make him more miserable. "Well at least put on a fake smile, it is your birthday for god's sake."

Mother would you be able to see through that fake smile? Of course you would, you would try to make that frown and scowl into a smile. You never wanted to see me sad, you were always trying to keep the family happy and you did. You were perfect, if you were still here it would not be raining and perhaps I would be able to enjoy that today I'm officially a high school student.

"I'm sorry Yuzu, I'm sorry I worried you." He opened the door, and saw a wide-eyed 11 year old. He put a hand through her hair and messed it up half-heartedly and walked past her. Yuzu stared at her feet; yes her brother definitely wasn't being himself. She made an attempt to flatten her hair before joining her brother downstairs. Her brother was greeted by an enthusiastic kick in the face by his father. "Hello Ichigo, fantastic for you to join us. I'm so proud of you! You are now an adolescent, and you can find true love, get married and bring honor to the kurosaki family name and…" the tables had had turned. Ichigo sent his pops flying and crashing into a wall. "Cut the Dr. Phil crap would ya old man? I'm not in the mood!" His normal scowl was there, but he hadn't hurt his father as hard as he normally did. Ichigo ran his fingers through his bright orange hair. He grabbed his food and grabbed his raincoat. He located his ipod in his pocket and popped in his ear buds. He randomly shuffled through his songs. He found a song, and grunted sarcastically. The song he found was memories in the rain. He took his chopsticks and heaved food into his mouth. He hadn't eaten since early in the morning and even then he didn't eat much. He finished his instant ramen and looked up into the sky. The rain seemed to be perpetual. He threw his bowl inside before taking his feet around karakura town. He didn't want to be with anyone at that moment, he just didn't feel like being sociable. The rain slicked Ichigo's orange hair making it look glossy.

If I were the rain
could I make someone happy
could I entice a smile of on a angry face
if i were the rain
could I be the sorrow
that causes so much pain
if I were the rain
could I soothe the grief stricken soul
on a cold winters night
if i were the rain
would I be anything more than a hated reminder
of a far off occurrence
if i were the rain
would I be anything more
than the tears of dying angels
falling to the ground
mixing with the silent streams that run down tender cheeks
could I be more than alibi?
If I were the rain
would the retaining clouds
be able to quarantine
my passionate free fall
as I ripped open the heavens and gracefully fall to earth
if I were the rain
would I be able to cultivate love
as I slipped from the heavens
would I be able to let it bloom
as I hastily fell
would the cries of passion and sorrow
pit pat
be heard
as I softly hit the ground
if I were the rain
could I be loved
instead of silently hated
if I were the rain
could I ever love
find true happiness
if I were the rain
would my cries be heard
my tears seen
if I were the rain...
if I were the rain...
if I were the rain...
the rain...
rain...
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Rukia was arriving home late to her dismay, she knew she would receive a scolding from her older brother and a lecture on how she's a disgrace to the Kuchiki name and how she should be glad that he adopted her when unbeknownst to Rukia, her brother was asked by her sister, his wife to find Rukia and take care of her. Rukia walked as fast as she could. She found the Kuchiki manor and collected herself before opening the door to her brother's room where he would dwell most of the time. "You are late again Rukia," said a nonchalant and emotionless 6th squad captain, Byakuya Kuchiki but Rukia could see through that and knew that her brother was indeed angry. Rukia knew that any spill of emotions were unwanted and prohibited in the Kuchiki noble family so she grew to bottle up any fear, doubt pain and sadness as it would be nothing but a burden. Rukia made sure to go on her knees in respect as she always did. "My apologies, nee-sama. I was talking with Renji and…" There was a silence, a silence that made Rukia's insides twist with uncertainty. "Rukia there are no excuses, if you wish to be a real Kuchiki you must learn to show respect for my rules and live up to the other nobles before me. You have no time to mingle with commoners and a rat such as him. Now leave, you are dismissed." Rukia's eyes had fallen but she held her face. "Yes Nee-sama, I will not disappoint you again." She made a curt bow before closing the door. She would go to her own room and attend to her studies, as she must keep up her grades to not anger her brother. She of course found kidou class most enjoyable as she had always been at the top of her class in that subject. She was failing in Sword tactics and strategies. She grabbed a fake zanpaktou and began to practice what she had learned today. She was still studying when it was at night's peak. Exhausted, she dropped the sword, sweat all over her back. She fell back onto her bed and took a cloth and wiped her face. She looked outside to see the full moon. She grabbed her robe and walked outside softly as to not awake her brother. She sat marveling at the moon's beauty. This was a peaceful night, one night that which others would take for granted, but not Rukia. She put her head in her hands sighing. It had been over 100 years since Rukia first came to the soul society. Over time, her memories had rusted and it was getting harder and harder to remember. She smiled as she recalled when her and her childhood friend Renji had met. They were little kids just trying to fins ways to survive. They were in the 88th district of Rukongai, the poorest of them all. Back then it was her, Renji and his group of followers. They lived as outsiders and had to steal food. It was always a game of chase. Rukia saved Renji the first time they met. However as the years grew, their small pack had died and only Rukia and Renji were still alive. They both decided to go to the Shinigami academy as they both wielded strong amounts of reiatsu. However they slowly drifted as Renji advanced and Rukia did not. Then she was asked to be adopted into the Kuchiki family, she reluctantly accepted but left Renji heart-broken. Now Rukia did not even know if Renji was her friend or not anymore. Rukia felt now more alone than she had ever felt, despising herself for her weakness. Her legs trembled as she was bracing for a melt down but held it in. Nobles did not shed tears or have any display of such trivial and unnecessary emotions.

You never thought of me as a noble did you…Kaien-dono? Rukia felt her eyes darken as that cursed night returned to her memories again. It was raining hard, and there was Rukia's sword thrusted through his abdomen piercing his heart. Rukia embraced him tightly not wanting to let go. "Thank you Rukia, now my heart can stay here." Rukia trembled. "No Kaien. I'm not one to be thanked. I was selfish. I only wanted to save myself. I'm pathetic. I'm not worth anyone's sympathy or love. I'm despicable." It was then that silently, Rukia cried, tears streaming down her face. She felt darkness overwhelm her and she collapsed outside, drifting off into unconsciousness.

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A/N: As I said in my mad skilled summary (not) Ichigo will die, but don't worry Ichigo fans! I will make sure for him to be not as OC as much as possible. This is not a fluffy romance IchixRuki like some I have seen. This one will have a balance of humor, Romance, and Action. This is also my first fanfic so don't kill me with bad reviews, though I would like just some reviews. I plan on having the next chapter is out by this Sunday. If not, I will have all of February break to do so. ICHIGO AND RUKIA FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!