He sank down in the large wingback chair in front of the open fireplace in his study. Watching the flames flicker in the dark had the same soothing effect on him as watching the wheel on his spindle turn.
And the gods knew he needed all the soothing he could get tonight.
Rubbing his hands together slowly, his thoughts wandered back to the incident that had occurred earlier, when he had caught hertumbling down from a ladder while trying to tear down the curtains he had meticulously nailed shut ages ago. He had reacted instinctively, reaching out as she landed safely in his arms. The feel of her against him, her scent and her warmth, he couldn't get his mind off it. Sighing in frustration, he reached inside his vest for the small hip flask filled with strong liquor. He drank all that was left in one swig.
These… feelings left him very disconcerted. Parts of him that he had thought long dead had apparently only been sleeping, and they were waking up with a roar ever since Belle entered his household.
There was no denying it, he was lonely. But the fear in his heart stood in the way, as always. She could never care for him, even imagining such a thing was nothing but naïve and a waste of time. He lifted the flask to his lips again before remembering that it was empty. He tossed it over his shoulder in disgust.
The room grew darker as the flames in the fireplace turned to glowing embers. He closed his eyes for a moment as he remembered the look on Belle's face as she lay in his arms. Her red lips slightly parted in chock, so close to his own. Drowsiness overtook him as he sank lower in the chair.
The sudden sound of light footsteps wrenched him from his almost-sleep. Someone was skulking around and immediately he was wide awake and on alert.
The soft light from the two candles on top of the mantel left nearly the whole room pitch-black. He leaned to the side and squinted into the darkness. He could feel the old familiar paranoia rising in his chest as he called out into the room mockingly:
"No point in hiding from me, you know. I can easily find you."
He was surprised to hear a slight giggle from the right hand corner, only a few feet away from him.
"Belle, is that you?" he asked tentatively.
"Who else would it be, silly?" She almost seemed to materialize before him through magic, stepping up close with a shy smile on her face.
"I couldn't sleep so I decided to have a look around." She seemed amused at how uncomfortable he looked, as if she had caught him in the middle of something embarrassing.
"I'm sorry if I woke you up." Kneeling down on the floor next to him, she placed her hand on his knee.
He tensed up, not knowing how to handle the physical contact and her sudden inexplicable presence.
"You shouldn't wander around. Not every place in this castle is safe." He said, and swallowed against the sudden dryness in his throat.
"Well I'm sorry, I was curious and I wanted to have a look around." She said, seemingly completely oblivious to his warning glare.
"I would prefer it if you didn't, dearie. Not without letting me accompany you at least. Now, if you'll be so kind and return to your bedroom, and I shall do the same. Good night to you."
He practically jumped out of the chair with a flourish, feeling the need to get away from her and the strange things she did to him.
She stood up and brushed her hands down her skirt.
"Can I see where you sleep first?" She asked, as if she hadn't registered the firm goodbye.
He stopped in his tracks as he was making his way to the door located on the far left of the study.
"E-excuse me?"
"I'd like to see your bedroom please. If you don't mind, of course. You said that you'd accompany me if I wanted to have a look around." Belle said, with a curiously defiant facial expression.
"Nothing to see, really. It's like all the other rooms, dark and dreary." He answered, feeling flustered.
"Well, I would like to see it anyway. I think it would be interesting to see the so-called monstersinner sanctuary." She said with amusement. He stared at her for a few seconds.
"Very well then. This way, if you please." He gestured towards the door and she followed him through it into the bedroom.
The room itself was windowless and stuffy. Dark drapes hung along the walls, embroidered with images of dragons, mountains and battles of old. She glanced around with an interested facial expression before sitting down on the edge of his bed, her hands in her lap. She turned her head to him where he stood fidgeting nervously with his hands.
"And how do you like it?" He finally asked, when the silence became pressing.
"It's very nice, a little dark perhaps, what with there being no windows and all. But I suppose you like it that way?" She said, running her finger absentmindedly over his bedcovers.
He caught himself staring at her hands. Annoyed, he stepped out into the study and held open the door.
"Yes, I suppose I do. Now if you don't mind I'd like to go to sleep, and I think you ought too as well."
She looked at him with a crooked smile, before getting off the bed and walking past him slowly.
"Alright. Good night then, Rumplestiltskin."
It was the first time he had ever heard her say his name, and it sent a shiver down his spine. He waited until he could no longer hear her footsteps before closing the door behind him.
Sighing with relief, he hung his clothes over the edge of the chair before getting into bed. He stared up at the ceiling, his mind racing with thoughts.
It was time to put his foot down and stop her incessant tries to get closer to him. He needed to protect himself; he'd been far too lenient with her. Starting now, things would be different. Oh yes, no more of this. Here and now is where it stops. She was obviously out to hurt him or take revenge somehow, he had locked her up after all, so why shouldn't she? It made sense, when he thought about it. He clenched his fists in anger for being so trusting. He would resist her from now on.
"Why are you so convinced that I'm out to hurt you? Maybe I'm just trying to be friendly."
He bolted upright and yanked the covers up to his chin, his heart pounding.
"How… what?" He whispered, licking his dry lips. "What did you say? How did you get in here?" He demanded, staring incredulously at her where she sat opposite of him on the chair where his clothes hung. How had she gotten in here without him noticing?
"How did you become so bloody paranoid?" She rose slowly and edged closer to the bed. "Can't you just accept the way things are?"
He opened his mouth with a snarl, about to argue. But the words failed him when she started undoing the lacing on the front of her dress. She let her clothes fall to the floor, standing naked before him. He gasped in shock. Sudden, nearly painful arousal and something he vaguely recognized as panic reeled inside his brain. Smiling softly and her eyes twinkling, she gently pulled the covers away from his death-grip. Feeling exposed and vulnerable, he subconsciously drew away from her as she crawled up next to him. Noticing his insecurity she touched his face, stroking the slight stubble on his chin. He looked at her, holding her gaze for a long time.
"Why?" He asked finally, unable to contain the word any longer.
She put her face close to his, her hands on both sides of his face.
"Because I want you, Rumplestiltskin. And even if you believe otherwise, that is the truth."
A moan escaped him when her soft lips touched his. A warmth like wildfire spread inside him, and he raised his trembling hands to her, not sure where to place them. He settled for her shoulders as he pulled her closer.
"Do you want this?" She whispered in his ear, her breath teasing him.
"Gods yes." He answered shakily, letting his trembling hands roam over her shoulders and down her back. He was delirious with lust, unable to push her away now.
She trailed kisses down his throat, her hands stroking the inside of his thighs. He tilted his head back and closed his eyes, shuddering with pleasure. The thought occurred to him that this was a trick, a cunning way for her to make him weak. He wanted to be strong, force her out. But when her warm hand wrapped around his hardness, all his resolve melted away. He groaned helplessly when she started to stroke him. When she squeezed the head gently he began thrusting into her hand. How long ago had it been since the last time someone touched him like this? He couldn't remember. In fact, he doubted that anyone had ever pleasured him this skillfully. She knew exactly how to bring him tethering on the edge, torturing him with denial. He twisted his hands in the bed sheets, his hips arching involuntarily as she increased the speed. He was so achinglyclose.
Rumplestiltskin awoke with a start.
It took him a few moments to register where he was; alone in his study and still sitting in the wingback chair.
Of course, he thought. He was drenched in sweat and his leather-pants clung uncomfortably tight to his skin. With a groan of pure frustration he hurriedly unlaced the front and grasped his erection firmly, trying to hold on to the dream. He could feel his heartbeat pounding in his chest as he thrust erratically into his fist.
"Damn her." He whispered softly between heavy panting. He could feel the fire spreading inside him again as he tensed his legs and quickened the pace of his hand.
With a low moan he finally came; weeks of pent up frustration and lust draining out of him.
Enveloped in the darkness and silence, his breathing slowed down gradually.
With a lazy wave of his hand the wet spot on the front of his shirt disappeared. Being a wizard had its benefits sometimes.
He felt something akin to shame, and a sort of emptiness at being alone in this dark cold room instead of in bed, with her. He shook himself mentally.
No, it's better this way, safer this way.
And no matter what, he had always preferred safety.
Coward.