He stood there quietly, arms hanging on both sides, head slightly bowed, eyes gazing through the veil of long lashes. Closely he watched him—his baby brother—stuffing all his belongings to a shabby duffel bag. He looked so happy, his brother. Why, who isn't.
But he didn't realize the brother had lifted his head and looked at him, and it wasn't happiness that was in those eyes.
"Dean?"
He jumped slightly but immediately covering his embarrassment with a small cough behind a fist before flashing a wide grin and sprinkling lights over his eyes. How fake.
"Yeah?" Dean made sure his voice didn't betray him.
Sam hesitated a little before he continued his packing. "No. Nothing."
"So," Dean shifted toward Sam's bed and seated himself on its edge. "You're ready to leave?"
Sam's brow creased a little and his eyes sought any signs of grief in Dean's. They were not there. Dean was too good in hiding them. Damn.
"I think I am," Sam replied slowly. "Hey, Dean?"
"What?" Dean lifted his eyes from the duffel bag.
"You're sure you're okay with this?"
"With what?"
"You know – me leaving." Me leaving you, said Sam silently.
Dean's eyebrows rose and he cleared his throat. Some of the lights diminished from his eyes.
"Yeah. Yes, of course. This is just the thing you've always wanted to do, and now your wish's been granted. So there. Enjoy it. And I'm happy for you."
He is, really.
"Because, you know, we've never been far from each other before," said Sam awkwardly.
"Hey," Dean snapped. "You want a hug or something?"
Sam snorted, ducking a little just so his older brother couldn't see him wipe his eye. But – Yeah, why not?
And – Yeah, why not?
Without Sam knowing it, his thought echoed in Dean's mind. He couldn't imagine. Tomorrow there would be no more Sam. He would sleep alone in this cold motel room. It was true that his father would be next door, but it really didn't matter. This room would feel too big for him. And it would be so dark…
There was slight awkwardness afterwards but,
"Nah," Sam snickered, followed by Dean.
But Sam could swear there was a flicker of disappointment in Dean's eyes.