If you find me and if you care;
No one cares about me. Another day comes to an end. I lazily gazes around the bathroom as I soaks in a warm bath. A sigh escapes my mouth. I stepped out of the tub and wrapped a towel around my waist. When I get to my room I checks my phone. No missed calls and no new messages. I laid down on my bed and stretched. My day was stressful and all I wanted to do was relax, but there was too much on my mind.
I am all alone. I was a loser. I lived in a small apartment in the middle of nowhere and worked at some fast food restaurant down the street. I barely made enough money to support myself and all of my bills were overdue. I had no one to help me. I was just another face in the crowd. On the other hand, my brother Alfred was a famous star with loads of money. But my brother never helped me. Whenever I called him he never answered. The last time we saw each other he even forgot my name, twice!
I have no purpose for living. I moved to the living room and grabbed 5 different bottles of liquor. I opened the whiskey and chugged a quarter of the bottle before choking and gasping for air. I didn't want to live anymore. I was tired of being ignored and left out like I have been my whole life. But every time I tried to kill himself something would happen and it didn't work. I am meant to live out my life in misery. So the closest I can get to death is violently hurting myself.
I'm disgusting. The bottles were empty and everything was spinning. I staggered back to the bathroom with an empty bottle of vodka in my hand. I squints in the mirror and scoffs. Look at me; so ugly and disgusting. I punched the mirror and the glass shattered everywhere. My hand had shards sticking out and blood dripped down my arm. I hissed in pain and threw the empty bottle at the wall making more glass shatter in my face. I dropped to my knees and held my bleeding face in my bleeding hands.
JUST END IT ALREADY! I grabbed a large shard of glass and jabbed it into my right arm. I screeched in pain and dragged it across making more red ooze out of my pale white skin. My arm started shaking and I take another piece of glass. I stabbed my other arm and dragged down to my elbow. I looked around the spinning room as it started to come in and out of focus. This was it, I finally did it. I am free.
Goodbye, cruel world.
Yours truly,
Matthieu Williams
No one will miss me.