Enough is Enough

Alyna raised her bow, drawing the string back and slowly inhaling as she did so. After taking a moment to aim, she released her arrow. It landed slightly off centre on the target, but close enough to be considered 'on target'.

She blew a wayward piece of burgundy hair out of her eyes. Not good enough, she told herself. She was better than that, as she should be as the captain's protégé, but she was distracted. She was always put off when she felt her captain watching her. Even if she ignored the deep feelings she had for Sylvanas that refused to go away, her captain was considered the best archer in Quel'Thalas.

And Alyna always knew when Sylvanas was watching her. She had an innate sense for when she was, and she knew it annoyed Sylvanas that she had such a gift. It had got to the point that for some things Sylvanas had just stopped bothering trying to hide. Like now. She was a few meters away just staring at her.

Alyna was definitely distracted.

She also knew Sylvanas was aware of the affect her presence had during her archery practice. Or any practice. She was tired of the game the older woman appeared to be playing. Two years ago, Sylvanas had very painfully rejected Alyna after they had shared a couple hours of intimacy. Alyna had come very close to asking for a transfer, but she had decided to stay to keep learning from the infuriating captain. She was nearly at that point again though, as the last two years had been almost torturous.

It was abundantly clear that Sylvanas didn't know what she wanted. Everything she did around Alyna told her she wanted to explore a romantic relationship, but the woman stubbornly pulled away each time, and often cruelly. Nothing was good enough for the captain anymore, and she seemed to go out of her way to find fault with everything Alyna did. She also seemed to be everywhere lately. Whenever she turned around, Sylvanas was watching. It was starting to grate on her nerves.

Alyna nocked another arrow and raised her bow, drawing back the string.

"Freeze." Alyna froze, accustomed to the order. Sylvanas walked over and nudged Alyna's bent elbow up slightly. "You know better than to drop your elbow. That's why you've been missing."

Alyna spoke through gritted teeth. "I've been missing because you know you affect my focus with your staring."

She could see Sylvanas pinch the bridge of her nose in frustration. "Not this again. We're not having this conversation, Alyna. How many times will it take for you to accept that no means no?"

The young ranger lowered her bow and sighed at Sylvanas. "Somewhere between my saying you distract me and your ears you seem to have heard me ask you to be my girlfriend." She shook her head and stowed her arrow before she did something stupid with it. "Only you, Sylvanas."

"Captain," came the blunt reply.

Alyna narrowed her eyes before confirming, "… Captain." She felt her shoulders slump. "We can't keep doing this. I can't keep doing this."

Sylvanas shook her head, her eyes flashing with anger. "I completely agree. When are you going to grow up, Alyna?"

"Me? You're the one who doesn't know what she wants! You're friendly to me one moment, cruel to me the next. Your body says one thing, your mouth says another. You stare at me constantly and then take no responsibility for it when it unsettles me! You seem to take perverse pleasure in finding any and all ways to put me down."

"You're my protégé! It's my responsibility to train you to the best you can be! That means I have to watch you! It also means I have to be hard on you."

"Watch me, yes. Stare at me and practically stalk me? I'm not your possession. You have no right to be messing with my head."

Sylvanas clenched her fists. "I have no idea what you're talking about. If you don't like my methods, you're free to leave."

Alyna looked at Sylvanas for a long while. The captain's face was hard; her body rigid. Did she really want her to leave? Perhaps, it would be for the best. She could find no better archer, but if she couldn't learn from Sylvanas because of their personal issues, it didn't matter. She had considered transferring before, but she worried about being accepted by another company after the problems she had caused just before her graduation.

She sighed and reached into her jerkin. She pulled out the small disk that marked her as one of Sylvanas' rangers, and held it out to the captain.

Sylvanas looked at it, dumbfounded. She clearly had not expected Alyna to actually leave. That just made Alyna even angrier that Sylvanas' ego was such she expected everyone to want to follow her. When no hand was raised to accept the token, she dropped it.

"I'll be in the barracks, packing my things. Captain. Please arrange my transfer as soon as possible."

Alyna turned on her heel and strode away. She could feel eyes on her back, and for the first time she felt like she didn't care. She could feel herself going numb, and knew she was emotionally starting to shut down to be able to cope with how her future was about to change.

Damn you, Sylvanas Windrunner.

Sylvanas stood rooted to the ground as she watched Alyna walk away, head held high. She didn't know what to think, or feel, as she sensed a presence arrive at her shoulder. The female elf looked after the retreating form of Alyna alongside her for a moment, before moving round to look at the dropped disk.

Kyala shook her head and bent down to pick it up. She turned it in her palm a few times before she raised her eyes to her captain's. "Permission to speak freely?"

The ranger-captain sighed. "You don't normally bother to ask." She gestured for the experienced ranger to speak her mind.

"You're a fucking idiot."

That got her attention. She moved her eyes to finally make eye-contact with Kyala. Her words almost dripped with sarcasm. "I didn't know you cared."

Kyala chuckled. "I don't, for the most part. I just drew the short straw." Sylvanas realised that while it was Kyala talking to her, there were many other rangers in the vicinity paying very close attention to what was going on. "Whatever the hell is going on between you, Captain, is between you. But it's been affecting the company for some time now. This …" She held up the disk. "… was inevitable. If you don't get your shit together, Alyna's won't be the last."

Sylvanas grit her teeth. "What are you talking about?"

"You're constantly irritable, and you take it out on us. Occasionally you have a good day, but you've had far more bad than good for the last couple of years. You were never the easiest to follow, but we always trusted you had our backs and, most importantly, you were fair." Kyala looked genuinely sad. "Now you're just a repressed control freak. We've had enough."

"How dare you talk to me like this!" spat Sylvanas.

Kyala calmly shrugged. "You said I could talk freely. So, I am." She gestured around her at the other rangers. "We … are. Alyna already stood up to you and you wouldn't listen to what she was saying. You told her to leave. Are you going to tell us to leave too?"

Something about the words started to push through the angry fog that had taken hold of Sylvanas' mind. She didn't want them to leave. She didn't want Alyna to leave. Her shoulders sagged. She did want to be with Alyna romantically, but she also knew it could cost her. For most of her life, she had only ever wanted to be one thing … and that was Ranger-General of Silvermoon. She had trained and worked tirelessly to attain that goal. She was now a captain, and when the current general was due to retire she was already being talked about as his heir-apparent.

A romantic relationship with a woman could put all of that in jeopardy. Same-sex relations were not frowned upon so long as they did not interfere with societal expectations. Her society was so focused on family legacy and bloodlines that someone of Sylvanas' lineage was expected as a matter of duty to procreate, especially if she attained her goal of general. She knew, on all levels, that if she fostered a relationship with Alyna, she would not want to be with anyone else.

And it terrified her.

One day, their families would demand they separate. She knew that day would destroy her. Her attempt to avoid Alyna's advances had been self-preservation. She knew it had made her grumpy, even irritable. She'd had to fight her desires every step of the way, and that had been no small task. But it would appear the results had been worse than she realised.

Worse than she had wanted to know.

Her rangers were suffering because of her. Alyna was leaving.

Kyala had stood silently, watching the internal battle her captain had been going through. She chose this moment to softly add, for Sylvanas' ears alone, "If I may be so bold, Captain? Talk to her. Openly. Honestly. You … were a better person when she first joined us. We want you both back at your best."

Sylvanas looked down at the disk. Could she do it? Be open and honest with someone about what she felt? She had been happier when Alyna joined her unit. Life had felt easier. She had taken more joy from it. She had certainly enjoyed Alyna's company. And then the kiss had happened, and thrown her world upside down. Her heart and body had betrayed her. She thought of it frequently, and it made her angry that happiness was so close as to be dangled in front of her face daily, yet the moment she grasped it she would be destined to have it torn away from her later.

That had apparently made her an insufferable bitch.

She was so confused.

Slowly, she took the disk from Kyala's hand. "I … need to think."

Kyala nodded slightly. "Think quickly, Captain. While you still have a company to come back to."

Sylvanas pocketed the disk with a sigh, and moved away to find some solitude.

Alyna strode up the path leading to the ranger-captain's office and quarters, having been summoned. It had been four days since she had walked away from Sylvanas. She hadn't expected her transfer to be a quick thing, but four days wouldn't have even been enough time for a reply to arrive from the nearest company. She wondered what this was about as she knocked on the door.

She expected to find Sylvanas seated at her desk with paperwork up to her ears. The paperwork was there, and worse than she had ever seen, but Sylvanas was in front of her desk, leaning back against it.

The state of her shocked Alyna. She had dark circles under slightly swollen eyes. Her skin lacked the normal sheen it usually held, and her hair, while brushed, was limp. She looked around the office and saw several meals that had gone untouched. Her heart ached at the sight.

Then she felt angry.

Alyna folded her arms. "If you're going to blame me for this …" She gestured at the disarray in the office, "… you can save your breath as I'm just going to leave."

Sylvanas was momentarily confused before she gave a slight nod of realisation. "I … can see why you'd think I'd say that." She visibly winced. "I have not treated you, or the others, with the dignity you deserve."

The honesty unsettled Alyna. "Why am I here?"

The ranger-captain shifted uncomfortably. "I've been asking myself that same question a lot these past few days." Alyna knew her question had been understood, but decided to let Sylvanas go off on her tangent. "You wanted to be a ranger so badly, I had no choice but to notice you. Once you had my attention, I confess I have been unable to stop noticing you." She gave Alyna a wan smile. "Every day, you surprise me. Every day, you defy your doubters. And every day … you make me want to spend another day with you."

Alyna tilted her head, not quite sure she was hearing things or not.

Sylvanas continued, "You stayed because you wanted to be the best. After our … encounter … a couple years ago, I had expected you to want to leave. When you stayed, I didn't understand. And I let my inability to deal with my own issues get in the way of … everything. Your progress, the happiness of my company."

The younger woman finally stepped forward. "I stayed because I want to be near you."

Sylvanas shook her head slightly. "Because you love me." She sounded doubtful. "How can you love me, Alyna? You barely know me. You can't know the meaning of the word."

Alyna took a deep breath. The words had sounded harsh, but she understood where they came from. She tried to put aside the hurt she felt at hearing them. "Because of my age? You think I'm too young to understand what love is." She laughed slightly. "Tell me, Sylvanas Windrunner, in your near-century of life, do you know what love is? You've spent so much of your life ignoring your feelings I know you're not sure yourself what love is. Even if it was standing in front of you."

The ranger-captain immediately shifted her gaze away from her. Alyna hugged herself as she added, "You may want to think I barely know you, but I do know you. What I can tell you … is that it terrifies you to think that someone might know you better than you know yourself."

Sylvanas didn't respond. Alyna knew she was right. Their long nights talking had told her a lot about the woman. Their kiss two years ago had been everything she had dreamed of, but when Sylvanas had pulled away she had known what was going to happen. Deep down, she had known.

"You're so young," muttered Sylvanas. "How can you know such things?"

Alyna sighed. "You grow up fast when you're a magicless freak in a noble family of magisters."

The captain frowned. "You're not a freak."

"I'm treated like one. I can't even fall in love with a normal person!" Alyna was pacing as she ranted, gesturing as she talked. "It just had to be you! The one person who doesn't want to love, especially when that person comes with breasts and not enough between their legs! And the more I try to get you out of my head and heart, the worse it is. I'm a freak."

Sylvanas looked bereft. "I … am sorry." Alyna realised she was leaning against the desk because it was holding her up. "I don't know what to do. I can't give you the life you want with me, but I … want … to be with you."

Tentatively, Alyna moved closer to within touching distance, though she kept her hands to herself. "What life do you think I want, exactly?"

The older woman slumped. "Love, marriage, family. Happily ever after."

Alyna looked up at the ceiling a moment to gather her thoughts before trying to catch Sylvanas' eyes with her own. "Is that what all this … drama … has been about for you? You think I want to marry you and adopt?"

Doubt flashed across grey-blue eyes. "You … don't?"

Slowly, so as not to startle the woman, Alyna gently cupped her tired cheek. "My dearest Sylvanas. Do you only see my age? I'm not that naïve. It's impossible to be such in my family with these things. I know anything we may have is going to be limited, and on a countdown to the day our families marry us off." She smiled slightly. "I've been betrothed since I was a teenager, though since I joined the rangers it wouldn't surprise me if his family pulled out of the arrangement."

Sylvanas' eyes were wide with surprise. Alyna stroked her cheek with her thumb as she held it softly. "Even once we're married, it's … not uncommon … for those in relationships with others prior to marriage to continue them. Quietly. So long as the right children are had with the right people."

"You sound very blasé about it," murmured the stunned captain.

"I've known this was to be my life since I found out I was engaged to a man I would never be attracted to." She gave Sylvanas an almost shy smile. "I'm only attracted to women."

Sylvanas seemed to nuzzle her cheek into her hand. Alyna wasn't sure if she was imagining it.

"Do you really want to leave?" she asked quietly.

"No," came Alyna's immediate reply. "You forced my hand. I can't stay with you as you are."

"And if things were to change?" She sounded tired. Alyna knew their conversation was taking a lot out of Sylvanas, but she gave the woman credit for being brave enough to have it. Finally.

"Would they though? Sylvanas, you're bitter. You're too focused on what you can't have, ignoring what you can."

"And if that change is to take advantage of what I can have and enjoy it for what it is?"

Her voice was quiet, and shaking with more than a little fear.

"That scares you?"

Sylvanas' voice rose slightly hysterically. "Of course, it scares me! It would scare you too if you had any common sense!"

Alyna stepped closer, taking Sylvanas' other cheek with her other hand. She angled the scared eyes to her own. "What scares me is thinking about my life without you."

"Then don't leave me," came the pleading words.

Alyna bit her lip. "I need a reason to stay."

Pale grey-blue eyes moved between Alyna's. She could almost see the war inside Sylvanas as she held her face in her hands. She didn't dare move. She realised she was scared as well. Scared Sylvanas would not be able to take the steps Alyna so desperately wished she would.

Then Sylvanas moved. She wrapped her arms around Alyna and pressed their bodies together, her mouth seeking her protégé's. Two years ago, their kisses had been soft, and slow. Now they were passionate, and hungry. The built-up tension, frustration and emotion they had created in each other of late fuelled their kiss.

Alyna felt her mind becoming sluggish as her instincts and need took over. Doubt crept into her mind though as her fingers were busy undoing the ties on her captain's pants. She stopped, and pulled back, to Sylvanas' confusion. She looked down at where her hands were, and back up at Sylvanas, asking permission.

To her mild amusement, the nod she received was almost shy. Then Sylvanas stopped, and took her hand. Silently, she stood from her perch on the desk and started moving to the other door in the office that led to her private quarters. She moved backwards, not taking her eyes off Alyna.

Alyna couldn't help but raise her eyebrow and give her soon-to-be lover a lecherous smile. The look on Sylvanas' face almost made her laugh out loud as the other women looked half-terrified, half-aroused. She guessed her captain was probably wondering what she had let herself in for.

Alyna was wondering that herself, but had decided to just live in the moment. One day, they were going to have to talk about the same issues again. Until then, she was going to take everything Sylvanas was willing to give her and be everything she could in return for her captain.