As He Lay Dying
Disclaimer: I, unfortunately, do not own Once Upon A Time :(
Author's Note: So! This is my first endeavor into OUAT, and I'm so excited! I am completely in love with this series, and I am thrilled to finally be writing for it. Let me say up front that my favorite ships from this show thus far have been Captain Swan and Rumbelle. As a result, most of the fanfiction I produce for this fandom will be centered around those couples. That being said, I am making it a personal goal to make my stories as realistic as I can, so I'll be keeping things as in-character as possible. Thank you so much for reading, and please review with your thoughts! :)
Warning: Following Chapter contains character death. Proceed with caution.
It was beautifully tragic, in a way; in fact, it was almost poetic. There he was, sprawled upon the gravel, blood pooling around his body, his own hook lodged in his chest.
The pain was suffocating; it was all he was aware of in those moments. The blinding sunlight above him reflected off the pool of blood on the street, causing it to sparkle and glow with an almost magical quality. But Killian didn't even realize he was bleeding. All he knew was that his chest was on fire, he was burning; he was dying, and he couldn't even move to stop it.
He had never given up before, and a part of him was fighting like hell not to give up now. He'd told her, he'd told Emma, he'd said, "If there's one thing I'm good at, it's surviving." That's what he had to do; he had to pull through this, he had to survive, he had to move forward...
He tried to sit up. It took every ounce of his strength and willpower, but he slowly lifted his head from the ground. Some small rocks fell from his hair, and clattered back down. Killian focused on the sound of those rocks falling to distract himself from the pain of his wound.
And just when it seemed like he might be alright, like he might find someone to help him, the hook dug further into his chest, and he gasped with such surprise that his entire body fell heavily backwards once more.
There was absolutely no hope, and Killian realized that as the hook dug deeper still. He wondered if it would come through the other side; he hoped he would already be dead before he found out. How was he even still alive? How long would it take for these agonizing final moments to end?
He was a villain; he always had been, and he probably always would be. He, like every other villain, knew that a happy ending wasn't in the cards for him. But if he could just see her one final time, then this ending wouldn't be so bad.
Killian was a firm believer in fate; most "fairy-tale" characters, as Emma called them, were. So he wasn't quite as surprised as, say, she would've been when he saw a head of wavy blonde hair across the street.
She was walking with her son and another woman; based on the color of the other woman's hair, Killian assumed that it was Belle. They were walking with purpose, so Killian deduced that they were most likely attempting to find more clues as to the Snow Queen's whereabouts. They were so distracted, so focused, that they didn't even notice him.
He couldn't let her leave him so quickly; she was like sand that was slipping through his fingers. He knew that he was too late for any kind of help to save him, but he had to tell her how much he loved her; he had to say goodbye.
He wasn't sure how he managed to call out to her. He'd thought he'd used the last of his strength trying to sit up. Still, his rough, hoarse voice called out, "Swan!" as loudly as his weakening body would let him.
Her head swung back quickly, as he knew it would. She was such a quick thinker, she always seemed to sense when she was needed before anyone even asked her for help. For a moment, Killian saw her eyes scan the area around her, looking for the source of the voice she'd heard. He knew the exact moment she saw his crumpled form, because those big, beautiful eyes of hers widened with panic. She ran to him with force, Henry and Belle dashing only a step or two behind her.
She reached him within seconds, falling to her knees by his side. At first, she said nothing, her mouth hanging open in shock as though she didn't quite believe what she was seeing. She blinked rapidly, and Killian could see tears forming at the corners of her eyes. He hated to see her cry; he wanted nothing more than to comfort her, but he couldn't. He couldn't do anything but lay there.
"Killian," she whispered, her head shaking back and forth in obvious denial. Her breathing was picking up a bit, tears cascading down her pale cheeks. She swallowed heavily, her hands shaking as they reached for the hook that was, by this point, smeared with his blood. She grabbed Killian's wrist, as though she was preparing to rip the hook from his chest. Killian, anticipating the pain that would follow if she did so, grabbed her hand with his, and pulled it away slowly.
No, please don't, he pleaded with his eyes. She shook her head once more, trying to form a coherent thought between the pain that was surely tearing through her mind.
"I have to," she argued stubbornly, her voice thick with endless sadness. "Killian, please, I have to. It'll hurt for a minute, but it's the only way to -"
But Killian shook his head sadly, and said in a voice barely above a whisper, "It won't come out."
"What?" asked Emma, obviously confused. "What do you mean it won't come out? Who did this to you?" she was becoming more panicked, and Killian noted that she was even more on edge than before. She was used to these kinds of emergencies, but she was so much more shaken than usual. Was it because of him? Did she care about him more than he'd seen?
Killian's eyes flickered once to Belle, who was staring at him in mute horror. Her eyes were shining, showing that she, too, was almost on the verge of tears. She, too, would be crying for him.
He could have told them; to be honest, he probably should have. He could've shared with them that it was Rumplestiltskin's fault, his magic, that had done this. But as he stared into Belle's eyes, he realized that by speaking the truth, he would be breaking her heart. She was a good girl; she deserved her happy ending. And considering that he was truly a changed man, he would let her have it.
So he looked seriously at Emma, and said, "Magic. But it - doesn't - matter."
"Of course it matters!" screamed Emma. Then, she thought back on her words a moment, and lowered her voice. She was still crying, but she was trying to get ahold of herself. She leaned in closer to him, and for a split second, Killian thought she was going to kiss him. Instead, she told him quietly, "But it doesn't matter now. Right now, we have to heal you. We can talk about this later. You're going to be fine, okay?"
Killian chuckled a tiny bit, but the action hurt him, so he stopped and cringed with pain. He gasped between labored breaths, "'s too late for me, Swan."
"No, it's not!" Emma spat stubbornly. She tore her eyes away from Killian for just a moment to shout back behind her, "Go get help! Now!"
"Rumple's shop is just over here, I'm sure he'll have something we can use!" said Belle. Before Killian could tell her not to, she grabbed Henry's hand and ran in the direction of Mr. Gold's shop. It was only Emma and Killian on an otherwise deserted street.
"Lucky the town - seems - to - be - busy today." whispered Killian, trying so hard to smirk. Just seeing Emma's face now, no matter how distraught it may be, was taking his mind off of his imminent death. "Gives us more privacy." He suggestively raised an eyebrow, trying to seem normal.
"Killian," sobbed Emma, her voice rising an octave with worry. Her tears were beginning to flow more rapidly, blinding her vision.
"Shh," said Killian, trying to soothe the inconsolable woman before him. His arm felt like naught but dead weight, but he lifted it anyway, and wiped away one of the tears on Emma's cheek. He left a smear of blood upon her face, but she didn't seem to notice, and if she did, she must not have cared.
"Killian," cried Emma, her courage falling away to pieces. She was breaking down, Killian could see it. She pressed herself to him as closely as she could without causing him unneccessary pain, and breathed out, "Please don't leave me."
"I'll never leave you, love." said Killian, struggling to push the words out. His vision swam; the end was nearing, he could feel it. But he pushed through the haze for a few moments longer, just so he could comfort Emma one last time. He lifted his hand a final time, pressed it to her heart, and said, "I'll always be with you." Killian knew that he sounded cliché, sappy, whatever you wanted to call it, but he couldn't bring himself to care.
Emma clasped her hand with Killian's, holding it to her chest with as much strength as she could. "Is it too much to ask for you to stay with me alive?" she asked, and Killian couldn't tell if she was being serious or not. Her tears were making any facials expressions appear contorted.
Killian chuckled just a bit, shook his head slightly to one side, closed his eyes, and whispered, "I love you."
"I love you too," said Emma. She pressed her lips to his, conveying to him just how much he was loved. The kiss tasted of salty tears and hopeless desire, but it was perfect in its own right.
Killian kissed her for only a moment before his head fell back, limp, and his hand began to slip from hers. Emma vaguely heard Belle returning with Henry and Gold, but she couldn't understand their words. It was like they were speaking another language or something. Their voices were panicked, they were talking to her, they were trying to move her aside, but she couldn't focus on anything but Killian's still chest.
"No," she murmured, shaking her head. Her voice slowly rose, and she began to shake Killian as hard as she could, keeping in mind that she had to be careful not to hurt where his hook was still lodged in his chest. "No, Killian, no! Please, please! Come back to me, come back to me!" her sobs became more profound, and she latched herself onto him as tightly as she could. His leather jacket, which was stained with his blood, was now staining with her tears, and the scent of his cologne made her cry even more.
Finally, someone managed to pry her away from Killian, though she couldn't see who, and she heard Mr. Gold roughly say to her, "Step aside, Miss Swan!" She saw him spring down to wear Killian lay, and she turned behind her to see that Belle was the one holding her back. Belle was crying, too, though not as heavily as Emma was, and needing the comfort, Emma fell back and cried into Belle's shoulder. Belle responded by rubbing soothing circles upon her back, trying to ease the shaking. Henry looked sadly onward, unsure of what he could do to make the situation right.
Emma's eyes flickered one last time to the pavement below her, taking in the sight of Killian's face. He looked almost peaceful, like he was just sleeping. He seemed perfectly relaxed, serene, even. The only aspect of him saying otherwise, from what Emma was able to see, was the single silver tear resting upon his cheek.
"I love you," Emma kept whispering over and over again. Her grief consumed her, and the entire situation felt dream-like. It was as if she wasn't actually there, like none of it was real, like she would wake up any moment and Killian would be laughing and smirking and calling her "Love"...
The only thought that gave Emma any comfort at all was that at least Killian died knowing that he was loved. And that was some kind of happy ending...wasn't it?
I made myself cry while writing this :( I'd really like to continue this, what do you guys think? One-shot, or could it go further? Let me know! Oh, and I forgot to mention above; this story takes place after episode 4x04, but is not 4x05 compliant. The idea I went with is that Rumple cursed Killian's hook to get rid of him. There was so much tension between those two in The Apprentice that I wondered what might happen if things got out of hand. This is what I came up with. I think that's everything from my end, guys. Thanks to everyone for reading!