CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM.
Author: Musical Enigma
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Note: To put it simply, I was attacked by plot dinosaurs. They were vicious. Thus, I had to postpone the Mandrel Mishaps posting to write for them lest they ate me. So for the first time in recorded history, I have actually written this entire story out before posting. It's three chapters long, and I'll probably post the next one Wednesday, then the last on Saturday. So please please please (I'm not above begging or bribery…) Review?
Enjoy!
Chapter One.
Sora was a good lad. He did well in school, he never got into any gangs, and he admitted to that one time he kicked Kairi's cat in the face, thus giving it a minor case of brain damage (on accident). He could spell, he didn't have any substance abuse problems, and he brushed his teeth daily. He loved his family, his friends, and even the squirrel that gave him rabies in 5th grade had a spot in his heart. Sure, he was a bit on the short side and had a tendency for selective senses, but in all honesty, he could not figure out a reason why, despite all this goodness, he could not procure a boyfriend.
He didn't understand it. He was single. He wasn't evil. What could he possibly be missing in the search to obtain the love of his life? There was only one conclusion.
There must be something wrong with him.
But Sora was an optimist, and like most glass-half-full individuals, he set out with a positive outlook on his intent to learn of his imperfections; imperfections which he would fix before anyone else discovered how horribly flawed he was. It was a perfect plan.
The brunet figured the best place to start in search of his flaws would be with his family. They had known him the longest, so it was only logical that after nineteen years of living with the boy they would be some of the best pundits of his faults.
So it was that one particularly gloomy day in June found Sora knocking on the door of a small townhouse, bouncing slightly to relieve himself of the nipping wind. His choice in clothing, swim trunks and a matching wife beater, suddenly seemed impractical. But that didn't make sense. Summer meant sun, didn't it? It wasn't Sora being impractical; it was the weather.
Ten minutes of knocking later, the door finally opened to reveal a very disheveled Roxas. Sora grinned at his twin who had his pants pulled on backwards and a shirt that most certainly was not his. Roxas let out a small mumble that could have easily been "sorry to keep you waiting" or "why are you here." Sora just smiled, pushing past his sibling and sitting down on a couch in the living room. Roxas joined him a moment later, attempting to straighten out his hair with his fingers. The brunet noticed with the slight wrinkle of his nose that his blonde brother smelt rather odd, but chose not to comment on it.
"So…" Roxas began, having given up on his hair and choosing to cross his arms instead.
"I need some advice," Sora began, "you see—"
But Roxas didn't to see, because a loud thunk from upstairs startled him. Sora jumped in fear, and Roxas excused himself and sprinted up the stairs with a frightened expression. The brunet sighed and twiddled his thumbs, idly wondering if the weather would clear up. He had made plans to go to the beach today, after all.
On the second story of the house, Roxas whisper-yelled at someone to either shut up, or put their clothes on and get out. Ten minutes later, Roxas trotted back down the stairs with his own clothes on properly.
"Sorry," he smiled sheepishly, his face an odd shade of tomato, "I uh…my book fell into the uh…fishbowl." Sora gave a quizzical look to his brother's clothing and the blonde, catching the observation, stuttered out, "A-and I got all wet…getting it out. So I had to change…" Roxas gave a slight cough, "Anyhow, you were saying?"
Seemingly appeased by the blonde's excuses, Sora took a deep breath.
"Roxas, what's wrong with me?"
"Pardon?" The blonde boy asked, rather confused.
"I need to know what's wrong with me so I can fix it."
Roxas paused for a moment, studying his other half. The brunet boy seemed obviously distressed over this issue, and Roxas really wanted to help. On the other hand, Sora did not take well to criticism. The usually chipper boy was prone to tears even if someone were to hint that the macaroni art he made everyone for Christmas last year was anything less than extraordinary.
"Why?" Roxas asked finally, hoping to buy some time.
Sora gave his sibling a look that clearly demanded an answer. Well, quite honestly, to anyone else it might look like the brunet was trying to imitate a chipmunk, but the message was clear to the blonde boy who had grown up seeing that look multiple times. So Roxas held his breath and figured that worst-case scenario, Sora and him no longer lived together; he would not have to suffer through the aftermath of his words, not to mention the likely possibility of Sora sobbing his way into dehydration.
"Well, you're kind of—"
"Not sexy." A deeper voice cut in.
The twin's heads turned so quickly to the door that there was probably some severe whiplash involved. One twin turned an unbecoming shade of maroon. The other failed to notice this vibrant change of color and gave a smile and a wave.
"Hi Axel." Sora greeted, "I didn't know you'd be stopping by."
"Yeah, I thought you left earlier." Roxas all but growled.
Axel closed the door behind him and strolled inside, plopping down on the couch next to Roxas and slinging an arm around the blonde.
"Well, I thought I'd come even earlier." Axel smiled sweetly.
"What? That doesn't make sense." Roxas scowled.
He was then picked up and deposited between Axel's legs. It must have been very uncomfortable, Sora mused, because Roxas let out a squeak and a low "Oh." Axel let out an "oh" of his own. Sora cleared his throat.
"So," the brunet smiled, oblivious to the tension in the room, "I'm not sexy?"
"Don't listen to Ax—" Roxas began, but was cut off by a large hand over his mouth.
"Exactly." Axel confirmed, "You're cute."
"Cute?" The twins exclaimed in unison, one with a slightly muffled, angry tone.
"Yeah, but cute ain't no sexy," Axel continued, "Cute is for puppies and dresses and glitter paint. Cute is messy hair, chubby cheeks, and big blue eyes. I mean honestly, kid, did you ever grow out of your baby fat? Scratch that; did you ever grow? You're so short! You're like cute personified. And don't even get me started on your clothes. Sexy is tight pants, makeup, and leather; not week old clothes from the floor." The man sneered before making an odd noise as Roxas shifted in his seat, "Now if you excuse us, I've got a bit of unfinished business to attend to upstairs with Rox here."
And Sora witnessed as his brother was slung weightlessly over the tall redhead's shoulder and carried upstairs. He sat stunned for a moment, vaguely offended by the upfront condemnation of his adorability. Unfortunately when he thought about it, Axel was kind of right. Sora could invest in a new look. He might have some issues with the whole height thing though…
But for the record, his clothes were only three days old, and they still smelt fine!
A constant thud was heard from upstairs as Sora left the house. Axel let out something that sounded like a moan, and the brunet grinned. Obviously his twin was beating the redhead up for being so mean. Served him right.
Sora arrived to the beach late, gasping for breath. The sun had finally shown up, only now he really wasn't dressed properly for the heat's debut. Lying out on the sand, Sora's best friend turned a sleepy eye to the brunet. Whatever snarky words the man had meant to say died in his throat as he coughed slightly.
"Sora, what are you wearing?" He asked slowly, drawing his eyes up from the tight blue jeans to the half done black button-up shirt to the leather necktie and finally the black lined blue eyes of his best friend.
"Uh," Sora responded suavely. He wiped some sweat from his forehead with a grimace.
"Aren't you hot?" The other prompted.
"Gee, you think so Riku?" The brunet blushed profusely, "cause you're kinda—"
"It's like 100 degrees out." Riku interrupted.
"Oh." Sora slumped visibly.
"Silly," Riku smiled and gave the boy's hair a good tussle, "Good thing I still have your swim trunks from the other day in my car. I'll be right back."
And so Riku ran off to his car and Sora pulled his sweaty clothes away from his body and wondered what he had done wrong. But when the silveret returned with shorts in tow and all the brunet could worry about was how fast he could strip out of his outfit. As Sora ran off to play in the cool water, he figured that there were still more people to get advice from; he couldn't let one mess up ruin his entire plan.
He failed to notice how Riku's eyes never left him.
Two days later, Sora decided to pay his older brother a visit in the hopes that he would be more experienced in the matters of how to woo someone, as well as more insightful on what Sora was doing wrong. He cornered his sibling in the kitchen of his small one bedroom apartment just in time for breakfast.
"Sora!" The man cried in what could easily have been mistaken for panic, "What a surprise!"
"Hey Cloud," Sora greeted, pushing past his sibling and settling down at the table.
Cloud subtly closed the door to his bedroom and locked it before turning back to the kitchen where a skillet of French toast sizzled. He flipped the engorged soggy bread with ease and turned back to his brother.
"To what do I owe the pleasure?" The older blonde asked.
"Cloud, why will no one date me?" Sora asked, not one to beat around the bush on such a dire matter.
"Is that Riku boy causing you trouble again?" His brother asked with a frown.
"Cloud, that was years ago," Sora moaned, thunking his head on the table.
"I'll never forgive that boy for making you cry." Cloud smiled sweetly, placing a plate of warm carbohydrates before Sora and a kiss to his head. Sora grumbled from where his face was planted into the table. "I can still remember how you came home, sobbing about how Riku stole your first kiss. You were so cute—" Sora cringed at the word "—and big brother Cloud had to go beat that little shit up." The blonde beamed.
"I want a boyfriend," Sora mumbled when he finally gained the courage to remove his face from the woodwork, coming to the conclusion that he probably shouldn't mention to Cloud that it was Riku he was attempting to woo.
Cloud gave his younger brother a calculating stare before turning his eyes back to his French toast. He knew sooner or later this day would come.
"Sora…" the older man began with an exasperated sigh.
"Yes?" Sora looked up from his spot meekly.
"Do you know how to cook yet?"
"Cook?" the brunet asked with a tone of distaste.
"Yes, cook. Make food?" Cloud rolled his eyes. Sora rolled them right back. "I'll take that as a no. If there's one thing you should remember, the best way to someone's heart is through their stomach." The older blonde said with a small smile.
"But Cloud, I can't cook! You remember what happened last time!" Sora cried, obviously distraught with this advice. Cloud got up and meandered into the kitchen and returned shortly after with a large cookbook, which he placed in Sora's arms.
"Practice." Was his final command.
Sora scowled at the book for a moment before a heavy banging from Cloud's bedroom door interrupted the siblings. Sora let out a scream and Cloud stood abruptly, pulling Sora up from his seat and ushering him out the door.
"Thank you for visiting your dear brother but please do call before you barge in next time," the blonde said hurriedly as he pushed his younger brother out.
"What's behind that door?" Sora asked, putting up a good fight to see what was being hidden.
"The mailman." Cloud responded hastily.
Sora dug his heels into the carpet.
"Why is the mailman in your bedroom?" He cried out, horribly confused.
"I mean the mailman…asked me to look after his dog. I kept him. In there. Temporarily. The dog." Cloud stammered, finally shoving Sora out the door, "Ok bye!" And with that, the door was slammed directly in Sora's face.
Sora pouted as he carried the cookbook home to his own little studio apartment, intent on practicing like his brother had advised. Later, when the mailman stopped by to drop off letters, Sora sent him a curious look.
"You look confused." The ever-observant mail carrier claimed in a dull monotone.
"You're getting fatter." Sora mused, poking at the man's slightly protruding belly.
The longhaired brunet quirked an eyebrow and handed over the shorter male's mail.
"Tell your brother that Leon says hi." The man said with a small smile before leaving.
Sora went back into his flat with no intent on telling his brother anything seeing as the postal worker would have to go back to his brother's place later anyhow to pick up his dog. Something seemed a bit off concerning the whole situation, but the brunet chose to ignore it. So instead he dumped out his twelfth batch of fried cookies, and hoped that thirteen would be his lucky number.
Riku arrived at Sora's house on batch number twenty-seven, curious if his best friend would fancy watching the newest romantic comedy that had just come out on DVD with him. Movie in hand, the silver haired man marched up the stairs to his friend's home and knocked. He waited patiently, but soon the smell of burning caught his nose.
"Sora?" Riku called, a bit worried. He fished around in his pocket for the boy's spare key and hurriedly let himself in.
Inside, Sora did battle with an impressive billow of black smoke coming out of the oven. The entire kitchenette was an egg and batter covered disaster. Riku instantly jumped into action, opening all the windows and grabbing a towel to shoo the smoke away with his younger companion.
"Oh Riku! Hey!" Sora greeted cheerfully, as if his apartment weren't about to catch fire.
"What did you do?" Riku gasped as the last of the smoke cleared.
"I'm making cookies. I think this batch turned out best!" Sora exclaimed happily as he donned oven mitts and pulled out a sheet of questionable black blobs.
"Those are…cookies?" Riku asked, flinching back slightly as one of the "cookies" imploded unto itself with a hiss.
"Yeah. Sugar cookies." The brunet claimed with a hint of pride, rubbing his nose and leaving a flour trail across his face. "Wanna try one?"
Logic would say no, no one in their right mind would want to try a cookie burnt halfway to hell and back. But Riku took a cookie in his hand and with only a moment's hesitation, nibbled on the very corner of the charred object.
"Mmm?" Riku grimaced, holding back a gag.
"Bad?" Sora asked, obviously putout.
"They're not horrible…" Riku amended. Sora perked up slightly. "How about I make the cookies and you go set up the movie I brought?"
And so Riku set to work in the kitchen making his perfect cookies, and Sora set to work on the television so the boys could watch the film. With a heavy heart, Sora decided that perhaps cooking was not his forte. And as he settled down beside his best friend with a tragically corny relationship portrayed on the television and a warm cookie in his hand, Sora decided maybe that not being able to cook wasn't too terrible.
He failed to notice Riku's arm slung around his shoulders for the entire duration of the movie.
Sora was running out of family members who knew him very well. So it was with some trepidation that our brunet hero found himself at his final destination, knocking on the door so quietly that it was a wonder any taps were heard. He instantly began regretting his action when piercing screams of "Sora!" rang through the peaceful neighborhood.
Sora began to walk away from the house. He still had time to escape. He could hide in the bushes just ahead. There was still hope!
Just as he was about to leap into the shrubbery, a heavy weight tackled him to the ground. Thus, Sora was dragged into his old house by none other than his baby sister.
"Sora!" the girl squealed, taking an arm hostage and dragging the brunet up to her room, "it's been so long! How come you never visit? Why don't you and Roxas and Cloud come home? I miss you!" The girl whined.
"We were all here last weekend." Sora pointed out.
"I still miss you. Mom and dad are boring." His sister pouted.
"I miss you too, Selphie." The brunet smiled.
Selphie took to jabbering away again at what she'd been up to in the past few days in which he hadn't seen her. Sora listened like a good and attentive big brother, even allowing his nails to be painted a 'passion fruit pink' by the hyperactive child.
"When are you going to get a boyfriend?" Selphie asked after finishing a riveting tale of how her and Tidus were going to get married on unicorns or something along those lines. "I mean Cloud has one and Roxas has one, so why don't you?"
"Who are they with?" Sora asked, stiffened slightly as he was unaware that his brothers had procured significant others.
"Well Cloud is with the mailman…" Selphie began.
"No no no," Sora laughed, his anticipation easing, "He's just watching Leon's dog."
Selphie gave her brother an odd look and mumbled something about Leon not having a dog, but Sora chose that moment for his selective hearing to kick in. Selphie continued regardless, "And Roxas is with Axel."
"They're just best friends, Selphie." Sora chastised, "Honestly, where do you come up with these ideas?"
Selphie opened her mouth as if to say something, then thought better of it, closed her mouth, thought a moment, and then finally reopened it to repeat her initial question. Sora gave a long sigh at this, leaning back with care to avoid messing up his nails.
"I think something's wrong with me." Sora announced.
"Duh." Selphie responded. Sora shot the girl a glare.
"I mean in getting a boyfriend. I can't seem to do it right."
"Oh." Selphie thought for a moment, "it's probably cause you're not romantic."
"Romantic?" Sora echoed.
"Yeah. You know, long walks on the beach, holding hands, cuddling, gifts of chocolate and roses, sharing a paopu, candle lit dinners—romantic!" Selphie sighed dreamily.
"Isn't that all a bit…girly?" Sora asked.
"It's romantic." Selphie corrected.
"Sounds expensive too." Sora grimaced, wondering how his meager job would be able to pay for such extravagant things.
"It's ROMANTIC." Selphie all but growled.
"Okay okay, it's romantic." The male brunet admitted, raising his passion fruit pink fingernails in the air as a sign of defeat.
'You wanna watch the sunset?' Sora texted Riku as he walked home from his old residence. He only had to wait a few moments before his phone buzzed in his pocket with a reply.
'You want to hold hands too?' Said the snarky silveret.
Sora frowned and put the cell phone back in his pocket, thinking that had been one of his least productive attempts. He was nearly home when his phone buzzed again.
'Meet you at the pier in 5.'
Sora smiled before he realized he had past the beach around ten minutes ago. Not to mention he didn't have any presents for the silver haired boy. Setting into a minor panic, Sora took off at a run towards the nearest convenience shop. He didn't have much money on him, so Sora ended up buying a bag of skittles and sprinting the rest of the way to the beach.
It wasn't until he reached the pier where Riku was waiting, however, did the purchase seem utterly ridiculous.
"I uh…" Sora panted, "For you."
The crinkled yellow package was offered to the older boy. Riku stared a moment before laughing merrily. Sora, embarrassed beyond belief, turned away and cringed. He hadn't meant to make a fool of himself.
"If you were hungry, you should have just said so. I would've taken you out to dinner." Riku commented as he settled down, "now come on. Sit." A large pale hand grabbed Sora's smaller, tanner one and pulled the boy down beside him.
"Nice nails." Riku smirked.
"Shut up." Sora pouted.
They sat, their feet dangling just above the water, and watched as the sun set before them. The crinkled bag of candy lay forgotten behind them on the sandy pier (it would probably kill a fish or two in the near future). Sora quietly took in the beautiful image, having never tired of the island's fiery kiss goodnight to the earth.
He failed to notice how his hand remained tightly clasped in Riku's.