Disclaimer: Out of the thousands of people who write on this site, do you really think I am JK Rowling? Well sorry to disapoint you.

A/N: OK so I've realised the error of my ways and have decided to replace the first chapter because it's obviously done it's damage rather well. Notice, my original readers, that I've changed the Gillian comment so that people know it was a mistake by the narrator and not the writer… ah very smart I know!

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They're at it again

Well they're at it again. Harry Potter's weird friends Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. Every single Gryffindor knows (even the tiny 1st years who have been here for three months) that they are in love with each other.

Its old news. It's been happening for years. I think the first major fight they had was on Christmas day a few years back after the Yule Ball. I remember it particularly well because they were fighting about Granger's date. You would usally remember a row if it was about a fourteen year-old boy thinking he was better than the world's best seeker wouldn't you? I thought it was quite funny. Granger didn't though. Trust a sport-obsessed celebrity to pick the one girl out of any in this school who would rather go with someone else.

They think that no one pays attention to them but actually everyone is waiting for that glorious moment when they stop turning our common room into a screaming contest and finally decide to shut each other's big mouth and snog.

Of course they haven't been told but Weasley's older brothers, Fred and George (legendary for their Umbridge-is-cow-do-anything-to-get-her-out rebellion) established bets ages ago based on how many fights it will take for the two of them to shut up and finally go out. So far anyone who has bet under one-hundred and fifty has lost.

Well today they seem to be fighting about Weasley trying to get Granger to do his work for him – a rather common argument of theirs. They're sitting next to each other on one of the couches by the fire, but they are obviously trying to get as far away from one another as possible. Granger has a hand on her hips and is looking at her future husband in utter disgust. Every now and then, they edge back a fraction further, trying to see who can get closer to the arm of the couch without falling over the side no doubt.

Oo she called him a thick git! I can't help but notice a couple of my friends around me are smirking at each other, I suppose I should point out that although this is rather annoying and is getting very old, the pair do manage to come up with some impressive insults to throw at each other.

She must be in a particularly bad mood however, because we can't forget that they are supposed to be friends, and they are both secretly (but not so secretly) in love with each other. You can tell they regret what they say afterwards but right now… well let's just say that anything goes.

The redness in Weasley's face has just intensified, he's looking more and more like a tomato every second. He's opened his mouth for a nasty retort, but I think Potter's spotted the danger because he's just stepped in. He's looking almost as angry as they are, it must really get to him. Damn, the voice of reason has just entered… okay, maybe not as reasonable as I thought because he has just called them both idiots.

Time: 5.45pm. Hardly anyone has gone down to dinner, after casting a filthy look at Harry, Granger has stormed off to her dormitory, she doesn't usually come out after a row like that till the next day so this seems to be a another foodless night for her. Pity, there was some very nice roast beef on the menu tonight.

But neverthless, we're all relieved, we can have a reasonably quiet common room which doesn't occur much these days. Fancy them both being prefects (and Granger a know-it-all) and ignoring their own rules of shouting in the common room. And I think the other prefects are too scared to have their heads bitten off to say anything. I don't blame them, Weasley looks like he's going to murder the next poor soul who comes within three feet of him.

Oh no! Weasley's younger sister, Gillian… no Ginny (I've just been told off by one of my very annoying friends who's breathing down my neck) has approached him, she must be trying to console him. I would be admiring her bravery if it didn't seem to me to be more like insanity. She has guts in any case - and she's going to be killed… what a waste.

OK slight exageration I admit, she hasn't been murdered by here lovesick brother, but it looks like he said something really rude because now she's getting as angry as Granger was. She seems to have inherited the same characteristics as Ron; her ears are becoming as scarlet as his were minutes ago. Oh fantastic. My ears will be ringing when I go to bed tonight.

A/N: I hope this has been an improvement, the original was… well trash I admit. I just also have to point out that I definitley don't feel the same about Harry's best friends as the narrator, I think they are fantastic and I love them to bits! But I think we've seen enough of my particular point-of-view already, time for a change.