Title: Old Pizza, Bad Memories
Author: The Love Mutt (thelovemutt@aol.com)
Pairing: Spike/Xander later on.
Rating: R
Summary: Xander thinks about how much his life sucks.
Xander lay on the couch on his stomach. His head hung over the edge about a foot above a week old un-refrigerated half pizza. 'I really need to eat,' he though. The thought of eating food, not just the moldy pizza but thoughts of eating any food at all made him want to vomit on said moldy pizza. It was a new feeling for Xander. In the past he was always happy to eat, but not today.
'What's wrong with me?' he asked himself. But he knew and just asking himself that question made the tears well up in his eyes. The fuzzy pepperoni and mushrooms blurred before his eyes. He wasn't going to cry though. If he wasn't worth her love then she wasn't worth his tears. Nevertheless, he cried.
It began as light as just a few tears fell down his face. Small puddles of saltines landed on the pizza. Anya'd ordered it. Xander didn't even like mushrooms, but it was what she wanted so he dealt with it.
He hadn't really moved since then. She told him it was over. Then she left, just like that. She didn't make any lies about wanting to be friends. She'd just left his life and left him there staring at a box of pizza.
Xander's head began aching from the rushing blood and he realized he shouldn't leave it below body level for so long. He rolled over so his face was in the crevice between the back of the couch and the cushions and drew his knees into his chest.
His silent tears graduated into something more. It was still an understatement of his pain, but the sobs made him feel better.
End pt 1. Note: the division of parts have nothing to do with actually breaks in the story and each part isn't a chapter. The size of different parts reflects on my laziness when it comes to writing more and my impatience with wanting to upload NOW rather than later.