I dont own The Outsiders, I just like playing a bit with them, Enjoy!
Tulsa, Oklahoma. August 1957.
The sunlight made him squint his eyes while looking at the bright blue sky. The heat instantly making him feel happy on a sunny day after long days with cold and loud rain hitting on his window and thunder shaking him awake in fear at the middle of the cold dark night.
Him and his little brother were outside on the sidewalk just in front of the house, waiting for their older brother to come back from a friend's house where he had spent most of the day, so they three could go to the lot with friends and play around for a bit before dinner. He was just standing looking up at the sky and the clouds above, as well as looking the other houses. Anything to make him less bored than he was at the moment. He was wearing a new shirt that him mum had gotten him on christmas, the sleeves were down 'till his elbow, and bright red colored. He loved his new shirt, but it itched at the back.
He was staring at Mrs Loulendale's house, she was and old woman that lived alone since he could remember. Darry had once told him she came from Germany, escaping from a big war that happened wherever Germany was. The house looked old and abandoned, you only knew someone was living in it because at night time light could be seen through the courtains. Sodapop felt someone touching his arm.
Ponyboy.
''Soda, let's go to the swings! I wan' to go!'' begged his little brother tugging at his sleeve, making him look down at him. The little boy was wearing Darry's shorts from when he was about Ponyboy's age, but even though the clothe was meant for his age, it still seemed a little bit too big for him. The light made Ponyboy's hair look really red, and a few freckles were starting to appear on the red headed boy since last summer, making him look like a common red headed boy with green eyes.
Ponyboy meant the park that was just a few blocks away, the one with a fountain in the middle of it and some swings at the side, as well as some other stuff where children could play around, mostly before dinner, so their parents could be relaxed for a little bit.
''Pone, Darry said we have to wait here on the sidewalk and wait until he comes home.'' replied Soda giving a little smile that knew would convince Ponyboy. As well as remembering the words his brother told them both earlier this day about waiting for him to the lot and hang out with their friends before dinner.
Ponyboy sighed resigned, never doubting a word that Sodapop said and sat on the sidewalk, following both brother's orders about waiting here for while before hanging out with the group of boys. Silence followed between the two brothers, and Sodapop resumed watchin Mrs Loulandale's house and how the front yard looked dry even after the big rains they had earlier this week, but it was soon broken.
''Soda, please? Just for a little bit, then we can go back here and wait for Darry'' tried Ponyboy again, hitting lightly Sodapop's arm with his little fists, just as his brother had taught him the other day on the couch. ''Please Soda, just five minutes I promise''
Sodapop wondered for a second what could go wrong after all, thinking about it the swings and the vast space where he could run around and maybe he could ask Steve to come later and they could play race. Darry won't even notice, he thought ''Aight Pone, but just for five minutes.'' Agreed Sodapop and stood up, walking towards the park without even looking back. He couldn't just stay there and wait for Darry, he really needed to move otherwise he'll feel like his head would explode. Also, they would only be away for about five minutes, so when Darry gets back, they will already be there.
The six years old stood up and walked down the three little steps and made sure to be quick to hold his big brother's hand as their mother always asks them to when they went somewhere. Ponyboy was happy to be holding his brother's hand, as if by it he was telling the world that yes, Sodapop was his brother.
Hand in hand they walked down the street and passed the houses to get to the park, all houses looking sometimes abandoned, other homely, and other just a mix of both, houses with a nice front yard decorated with a few flowers and only if you looked closely you could how old the paint looked and how some of the windows had holes probably made by a baseball or some rocks the kids would throw as a joke.
As soon as they got there Ponyboy let go of his brother's hand and sprinted towards the swings, without looking behind. Rushing to get to the swing, even if the park was deserted and they were the only ones in there. Sodapop eyed the park quickly, just a glance to make sure Ponyboy had reached the swing but then he looked at the other parts where he and Steve could run around for a race and soon felt this huge need to just run around it, not wanting to wait for Steve, but he knew it would be no fun to play race alone.
''Please, Sodapop push me, push me'' chanted Ponyboy while wiggling his little skinny legs back and forth in an effort to get the swing moving, bringing Sodapop's attention back to him.
He walked to his little brother and smiled at him in an effort to cheer himself up and then walked behing him so he can push his back. Ponyboy grinned at this and let out a little scream of excitement when Sodapop pushed him lightly, making the swing move.
With his little brother letting out giggles and telling him how amazing the swing was, Sodapop smiled and felt happy in company of his little brother as they both laughed at nothing but the excitement of a six year old. Sodapop loved making his brother smile because he felt special. He was the only one that could make Ponyboy calm down if threw a tantrum or anything else made him upset.
The giggles coming from his younger brother as well as his thoughts about nothing in particular, made him forget about the so called five minutes. He realized that they have been at the park for at least, a good fifteen minutes if not way more.
''Ponyboy we hav'ta go now or Darry is gon' get mad'' He tells his younger brother, who's still having the time of his life, with the wind blowing in his face and his little legs moving around when the swing reaches the highest point. He doesn't even listen to what Sodapop says. ''Darry is gon' get mad Ponyboy, do you want to make Darry upset?''
Ponyboy heard clearly what his brother said, and the happiness and excitement were no longer in his expression and stopped moving his little legs when he reached the top. Sodapop as well stopped pushing him, making the swing slowly come to a stop. Ponyboy jumped off it and just stared at Sodapop.
''Do we really hav'ta go?'' He asked his older brother, looking up to him with an evident frown on his face.
''Yes Pone, lets get walking.'' Sodapop replied and himself started walking right ahead, his younger brother behind him just for a few steps. He had already walked around five steps when Ponyboy spoke out for him.
''Sodapop, will you hold my hand?'' He innocently asked. Now, for some, a six year old boy never asks someone to hold his hand, nevermind an eldest sibling. But Ponyboy has always been different, different greaser from everyone around the neighborhood. Ponyboy since a young age always needed assurance that everything would be okay, and for him only one person in the entire world could bring him the feeling of safety.
''Why?'' Sodapop asked. They were only a few blocks away and everyone was home eating dinner at this hour. And also cars could be heard from a distance, and no motor roaring could be heard at the moment.
''Because I'm scared'' Ponyboy simply replied, standing still just next to the swing.
Little did Sodapop knew that Ponyboy was simply scared of his older brother getting upset, and thought that if Sodapop held his hand, that way, Darry wouldn't be upset because at least he would know that he was using his head and hadn't forgotten to hold Sodapop's hand all the way.
''Scared of what Ponyboy? You must never be scared, never.''
Tulsa, Oklahoma. August 1968.
Everything was going perfectly fine.
Ponyboy had just graduated from high school with honors, Sodapop was now known all around Tulsa as the man that could fix your car no matter how many problems it had in a short time, and Darry, well Darry kept being promoted and didn't go up in roofs as much as he did when he started, now was in charge of the paperwork. He was thinking of opening his own business somewhere in the close future.
''Pone do you really need to finish that work right now? I'm ready '' Sodapop told Ponyboy in a low tone. They were on the library, and even though it only seemed that twelve people were in it, if you said something too loud some 'Sh's' could be heard all around you.
Ponyboy was finishing a paper he didn't need to do in the first place, but was so nervous about college that he started reading all the books he found hard during high school, making sure to understand them perfectly before the summer ended.
''I'm almost finished, I promise'' replied Ponyboy without even glancing up from his paper. His mind all set in the words that he had written, trying to make it as clear as posible for him to read it in a few months, if he ever did at all.
''Darry is gonna get so mad.'' whispered Sodapop mostly to himself, but knew that if Ponyboy heard him then they'd be gone from here faster than lightning speed. Sodapop didn't even know why he was with him in the first place, he only phoned to ask him what was he doing later and Ponyboy answered with getting a milshake and then head to Darry's friend house, where a simple party was held.
''I don't even know why he wants me there, I mean most of his friends are his age! Why would they want me there?'' Ponyboy had told him through the phone. ''And I just really want to get a milkshake, I don't want to go talk about golf with some elderlies!'' He laughed
''Come on Pone, they're just six years older than you I'm sure you can handle it'' I had told him. I knew the reason why Darry wanted Ponyboy there with him, but I'm sure Ponybo wouldn't believe me at all, not even Darry would accept it anyway, but I know Darry too well. He wants him there because he's the only one of our family that actually got to college. Not Darry, not me, only Ponyboy was smart enough to have a bright future ahead of him. And Darry? Well Darry was proud of him, and wanted his friends to know Ponyboy, to know that we're not dummies, and that even though life has been a little hard on us, we still stand tall.
''What if I come with you?'' I told him. I was bored out of my mind and had a day off, so I wouldn't lose anything at all. And also, Darry had some pretty friends that I have briefly met at the DX.
''WIll you?'' asked me Ponyboy with relief in his voice. ''Oh Thank you Sodapop!''
''No big deal! What time should I pick you up? We should go together ya know? So if one of us get a little tipsy...'' I said thinking how all Darry's friends were over twenty one and if one thing was surely going to be there, was alcohol.
''Sodapop I'm eighteen I'm not gonna drink any al- oh'' He realized that I wasn't talking about him and let out a short laugh ''You're not even twenty one!''
''But I will be in two weeks so it's no big deal, is it?'' I replied feeling a smile on my face. Not aware that Ponyboy thought I never drank for most of his life, hell, I barely drank! Just a few beers sometimes but rarely ever get drunk. Once in highschool was enough for me. That and the horrible migraine I had the next day were more than enough.
''Sure, but I also have to get something at the library, are you sure?'' He asked.
''Yes, and then we could get a milkshake and then head to that famous party that you have been invited.'' I told him nodding to myself, sounding like a good plan for me. ''So what time?''
''At five, is it okay?'' Ponyboy said with a chuckle evident in his tone.
''Sure, see you there buddy'' I told him and hung up, not even bothering to hear his reply and got up to get ready.
I now wish I could have talked more to him, now more than ever.
Ponyboy sighed ''I guess I finished, let's go'' he said and started to pack all the stuff back in his bag, his pencils and the three books he plans on making a paper about even though, I repeat, they're not needed. We stood up after he had packed all his things and headed for my car, who was near considering it's summer and no one even comes to the library except Ponyboy, who hasn't got a car. When he should, I mean the kid is way to smart to ever get his car crashed so I don't see the big deal about him having a car.
We got into the car and I started the engine. The sweet sound that made calm, relaxing my nerves and just enjoy the ride on my sweet baby. I sighed, soon Ponyboy will be off to college. Hell, I was proud when he got into high school, the little fourteen year old was no longer my brother, but a memory of how he looked and acted back then in 1965... when Johnny and Dallas were alive, as well as the year that their lives came to an end.
The street seemed empty, no other cars were seen around. Maybe one or two but not even in our direction, but could be seen from where we were. We reached a Dairy Queen real fast, since it was not that far away from the library. Each of us got a milshake and began drinking it right away.
Silence, we both stared off to the road, and Ponyboy occasionally looking at his window with the straw still on his mouth, taking slow and small sips of it.
I broke the silence. ''Are you scared of going to college?'' I asked him, one hand on the steering wheel and the other holding my milkshake, occasionally taking sips without my eyes leaving the road ahead of us.
''Not really.'' He said still staring into space, and then took a sip of his vanilla milkshake. ''I'm more scared of what comes after I leave college.'' He reasoned and then took a sip again, but this time the straw stayed in his mouth, probably biting it.
''What do you mean?'' I asked him with my eyes still set on the road. I brought my milshake close to my mouth and took a sip. Trees and trees passed around us, we were going kind of far from were we live. We were going to one of Darry's friend's house in the country.
''What if I get back from where I started?'' He anxiously said. ''Both you and Darry put so much faith in me, but what if it doesn't work out? What if I get nothing, and never get a job.. or if I f-''
''Shut up Pone you know it won't happen!'' I answered him honestly. Ponyboy was smart, nice, and really worked for what he wanted. If one thing I'm sure of, is that this kid will get far. My little brother will get far from where we started. ''Just don't get any chick pregnant and you will get far !'' I joked.
Ponyboy just laughed. But I couldn't help but notice how his face reddened a bit. ''Oh please Pony! You're seventeen ! You're not suppose to get all red if you hear something like that, why man'' I told him. I really meant that, after he was eighteen. At his age I had some experience, i thought to myself. ''Ugh Pone, you aint a virgin are you?''
He stayed quiet and then took a sip out of his milkshake ''...I'm not''
''Ya kid?''
''Barbara Richards, she dug the shyness Soda, she dug it real nice'' he said smoothly, almost with cockiness in his voice and I almost spat the milkshake in my mouth. Barbara Richards was my age, she was a real looker, all the boys liked her, hell, myself liked her a long time. She had these curves, and these big blue eyes that you just wanted to reach her an-
''Stop fantasizing next to me Soda, that's disgusting'' Ponyboy cut me off my trance with a tone of embarrassment in his voice, not a hint of the cockiness he had seconds ago.
''You're joking, you didn't do it with Barbara, you have to be joking'' I told him. There was no way my little brother did that, there is no way he was with Barbara Richards, we all thought the kid was going to get married first. Hell, he didn't have feelings for a girl until he was nearly seventeen, and now, four months later he tells me he had something to do with one of the hottest girls in high school? How do you expect me to believe that?
''Told ya she dug the shyness Sodapop, all the chicks did.'' He said smoothly again, making the word 'chicks' louder than the rest, as well as a laugh coming out from his mouth.
''Chicks Ponyboy?'' I said and looked at him ''Now you tell m-''
Blackness.
Numbness.
That's all I felt for a few seconds, I was floating through space feeling nothing, just air hitting me and I felt like everything weighted more, I felt more. My arms felt like they weighed a thousand pounds and my face felt like covered in oil, hot, thick, drowning oil. I couldn't breathe, I felt weak, I felt nothing... Everything was dark.
But not even all that felt worst that the horrifying dizziness I felt when I actually opened my eyes, adjusting them to the light hitting against my face. It all felt like a dream, and even a soft trace of a smile was on my face when everything was light again, it felt like waking up from a bad dream. Waking up and feeling that relief that the light brings you, the relief that it was all a dream, a bad dream, a nightmare. But it was soon a nightmare again when I took in my surroundings.
Shattered glass around me, everything wrecked, I can't even describe how it looked, it just looked... it looked crashed, destroyed... and even a faint smell of oil filled my mind. Oh shit, was the first thing I thought that and at least I'm alive. Relief was gone as soon as it came when I realized I wasn't alone. My little brother had been talking to me all the way. My little brother.
Ponyboy.
I instantly looked at my right and wanted to scream. But I knew it would be no use, not at all.
His face was all covered in blood,his head looking up but blood covered all his face and was flooding fast, way too fast I thought. I swore loudly when I noticed blood coming out of his mouth. That's not good, not good at all. Right now, when I think about this, I blame myself... I blame myself that I did nothing, I did nothing to help him, even after the doctors told me it would have been no use, I still blame it on me. I should have done something, I should have done something.
I was horrified when I saw all the blood, my brothers blood, on most of the windows of the truck. It looked like he exploaded and covered the windows with drips, thick drips of blood. I felt sick, I wanted to puke. I was scared. ''Ponyboy are you okay?'' I spoke to him, my voice shaking almost sure that I would get no answer, that he was dead.
So when his head moved and opened his eyes I almost screamed. ''Soda?'' he said with a low voice, almost a whisper. Not sounding like him at all, his voice wasn't that low, later I realized this wasn't him speaking.
''Don't move Pone, you can hurt yourself more, just don't fucking move ya hear?'' I said fast, hell I didn't even care if I was swearing, it's not like I have to remember my manners when my brother is dying next to him.
Dying.
My little brother was dying.
Air escaped his lips, and I could swear it was intended to be a laugh ''Doubt I can hurt myself more'' he said and closed his eyes again. ''I was lying, I didn't have sex with Barbara''
''Shit kid, I dont care if you banged her or not, just don't fall asleep, ya hear? Don't close your eyes'' I told him, the shock wearing off and I'm sure I was freaking out, but not enough to not notice the pain on my body. My whole body hurt, it hurt like nothing I've ever felt before.
He smiled, I fucking swear there was a faint smile on his lips, but then his face contorted and let out a wince ''Soda it burns, it hurts so bad'' He told me still with his eyes closed, looking up. He was spitting blood as he talked, and it scared me more than ever. I looked around but there was no fire. ''My stomach hurts so bad Soda'' he said and let out a breathe. How could he be so calm? I asked myself
Because he's dying, a voice inside my head answered me.
I was freaking out, but I surely was about to fucking faint when I looked down at him and saw the fucking rearview piercing my little brothers abdomen, and blood coming out of it. I almost fainted.
''Sodapop I'm scared, I'm really scared.'' He said, his voice lower than before, he was running out of air and his chest not going up and down as fast as it did seconds ago.
''Don't be scared, everything is okay Pone, we're getting out of this one.'' I told him even though, myself, I was terrified. What should I do? What can I do? I thought about getting out of the car and getting help but it would be no use since we were in the middle of nowhere and I couldn't feel my legs. ''Just don't close your eyes Pone, ya hear? Do not fall asleep.'' I told him even though he had them already closed, but what was I supposed to tell him?
''I'm sorry for not going to college Soda, I know how proud you and Darry were. I'm sorry'' he said, his voice barely a whisper, his chest barely moving.
''Don't you dare to say goodbye to me okay? You're not dying Ponyboy, you're here and you're not going to die, we're going to get out of this and we'll buy milkshakes and you're going to college ya hear? You're going to college and be a successful author or whatever you're going to be and we will all grow up and get married and you'll be rich and will invite us over okay? You're okay Ponyboy, you're okay.'' I ranted, not allowing myself to believe that my brother was dying next to me, that he was saying his goodbyes.
''Tell Darry I'm sorry, I love you guys. I love you all, the gang too.'' He continued, I was surprised myself when he could still talk. He looked already, it hurt to say it but he looked already dead, yet he was still talking. ''I guess I understand Johnny now, seventeen years aren't going to be long enough. I'm sorry for all the trouble I was, I'll say hello to everyone up there if heaven exists'' He was looking paler and paler each second, the blood draining his face and probably coming out at his abdomen. ''It's not your fault Soda...I'm scared'' He finished. But the last two words weren't said by my seventeen year old brother, but by my dead seventeen year old brother. His voice sounded different, more ghostly but peaceful at the same time.
I fucking lost it there.
''NO!'' I screamed. ''Ponyboy wake up, Pony please don't die, just don't die.'' I screamed, angry at everything, angry at myself, angry at him. I started crying, I sobbed, tears wetting my face and coming out in waterfalls. I must have cried a lot, because soon everything went black.
oooooooo
Tulsa, Oklahoma, 1992
''He said that?'' my sixteen year old son asked me. His green eyes looking at me with interest yet sadness in them. I sighed and nodded. Twenty-two years have passed since my little brother died. Twenty two.
My soon was soon turning seventeen, and I couldn't help but remember that my brother was his age when he left us. He had just turned seventeen and was going off to college... But he did't get to go, he didn't get to do half the things we all wanted him to.
When help arrived I was out of it, I had fainted for around and hour and I'm kind of glad I did. If I didn't I would have stayed with a death brother right by my side. Just a body, not my baby brother I remembered. Not the boy that spoke to me about being scared of growing up, thing he didn't do.
Darry cried as soon as he was told, he couldn't even try to hide his tears, he broke down in front of everyone not caring who saw him crying, just caring about the fact that his baby brother had died. He had died a few hours ago and there was no thing he could do to fix it. As to myself, I was a miracle. Nothing more but both of my legs broken and also both shoulder strained. The doctors still do not understand how it all happened since we weren't even going fast. How I barely got injured, and my brother had died within minutes. When I told Darry what Ponyboy had told me before he died he sobbed for hours. Same as the gang. Even Steve cried a while for the kid, I'm sure they could have gotten along when they grew up. Steve thought he was mature compared to Pony and thought Pony was too childish. But when we told him he had died he cried realizing that Ponyboy was still a child.
Two Bit just got drunk off his butt, but never touched alcohol again as soon as he heard alcohol was the reason of Ponyboy's death.
Yes, a drunk couple had impacted us on high speed, making the truck speed off the street and crash against a tree. Sounds simple but that took my little brother's life.
I never really knew the reason Ponyboy had died, what kind of injuries did he have and why they took his life, I didn't know until I had the courage to ask Darry, I never wanted to know. When I asked him, he just shook his head and said he died because of blood loss, and even if he had made it to the hospital, he would have died within hours.
To that I threw up as soon as I was alone, realizing that all the blood that I saw in the car belonged to my brother and was the reason why his body shut off.
''Dad?'' my son asked me again, making me come back from my thoughts. We had talked about Ponyboy plenty of times, My son had taked interest in him since he knew I had a brother, telling me how he wished he had met him. And I wished the same thing. Thomas would have been, with no doubt, one of Ponyboy's favorite people in the entire world, they were so much alike and I think Ponyboy would have enjoyed to have a nephew like Thomas. I looked back at him, making him know he had my full attention. ''Can we see him?'' he asked. ''While we're here? I think it's bad I haven seen his stone ever, even when kids from my class have been there.''
''Kids from your class?'' I asked him confused as to why strangers have been to my brother's stone. We didn't even like in Oklahoma anymore, we just were here visiting Darry and some old friends.
''Dad, The Outsiders it's famous worldwide... some kids in my class have been to the author's grave, to his grave'' he told me. I just nodded and told him we'd go. I couldn't help but have this feeling that we were all actually right.
The kid made it big.
oooooooooooooo
It's been twenty two years since he had seen his brother alive.
He'd be thirty nine if he had been alive, if he had survived he'd probably have a big family and come to Tulsa to visit family and friends with us. He'd be sitting at the table instead of having to come to the cemetery to see him.
But if he was alive, The Outsiders wouldn't have been published.
But he would have his own books out, maybe, Sodapop reasoned with himself.
''It feels weird huh?'' Darry tells me, looking ahead to all the graves across the cemetery, all the names. Mostly people that died around thirty years ago, the cemetery wasn't so big back then so these were the limits.
''I cant believe all these people comes here to see him.'' I say as I see around twenty people in a circle around my brother's grave, all looking at it. Some parents whisper at their kids who this boy was, others just look at it and sigh, and other just stay in silence looking at it.
Soon a woman around twenty comes up. ''I'm sorry but are you Sodapop and Darry Curtis?, I'm sorry, Darrel.'' She corrected herself. We both just nodded. ''I'm so glad to meet you I just..'' She smiles. ''Your story really meant a lot to me, I read it in seventh grade and I just wanted to come visit the author because I just fell in love with this book, I'm so happy to meet you two.'' She continued, I just smiled and nodded, not sure to do anymore. The book has been out around twenty years ago and I'm still not used to people coming up and saying stuff like this.
''Thank you, it's great the book had such a big impact on you, Ponyboy would have been happy to know a story about his life had and impact on people'' Darry said politely, and I just nodded along with him. The girl just smiled.
''I had the biggest crush on Sodapop, but also admired you Darry for being able to take care of.. you know... everything.'' She said quickly, I really don't know what to say so I just nodded. It's something hard to get used to when teenagers come up and say they had a crush on you when you were sixteen. ''I hope you guys have a great day.'' She said and walked off.
I saw Thomas walk to us looking sad, I'm sure he's going to vent off to his mother, thinking it would make him sad to know how much he would have liked to meet his uncle, but when he saw Darry he smiled. He loved Darry too. ''Hey Uncle Darry.'' He said. ''Can we go to get some food?''
''Sure bud'' Darry said and walked to the car. Coming to see Ponyboy at the cemetery was less hard with the years, I knew that he wouldn't like it if I was sad when I came here, as well as how I remember him. I don't remember him how I last saw him, but like the energetic teenager he had been, as well as a small little kid asking me to push him in the swing. I usually go and talk to his grave but seeing all the people around it I thought he had enough attention right now.
But just before I turned around, I said something I think every time I think of him.
''I miss you Pone.''
So yeah... I had a bit of a block about my two others fics so I wrote this baby as an apology?
As well as something personal, something like this happened in my family and my role would be Thomas in this... So kind of just like a tribute to the uncle I never met but would have loved to.
I was thinking of writing as well how Thomas knew about his uncle, as well as his thoughts on the book but I dont know it you guys would like it? Tell me if you do!
I'm new here, So constructive reviews are always welcome, as well as ideas if you want this to be longer (How Darry took the news, Sodapop waking up, Ponyboy thoughts...I dont know!)
So yeah, have a nice day!