Disclaimer for the whole fanfic: HBO and Alan Ball own True Blood, I'm just writing to entertain myself (and hopefully others!) until June 13th, because, as they so aptly put it, "Waiting sucks." No infringement intended at all.

This will be a series of one-shots based on the snippets HBO reveals in the weeks leading up to the premiere of season three. They will probably all be very short, and may end up contradicting one another. I will do my best to get each chapter posted within 24 hours after each teaser airs. (Since I'm trying to get these one-shots out so quickly, they will probably all be un-beta'd. So I apologize in advance for any mistakes I might miss in my proofing and I'm sorry about any possible roughness in the writing.)

Links to HBO's teasers are in my profile, at the top of the page.

Teaser One: In Production - Eric / Who Are You?

I've never held a gun before. Inexplicably, that's the first thing that crosses my mind as a man mean as spit starts launching himself at me-hands out, curled up like claws. Sure, I mean, I've held a shotgun, even fired one off a time or two because Jason thought I ought to know how to do it, but not a pistol, never a pistol. It was cold, and shiny. It was small, I could hardly believe something so tiny could cause so much damage, but it had.

Earlier that evening….

Tara was wiping down the bar while Lafayette's voice sang out from the kitchen, "It's raining men! Hallelujah! It's raining men!" As little as I felt like smiling, a small one still appeared on my lips. It was nice to hear Lafayette getting back to his old self. He'd been through a whole lot the past few weeks, and he deserved all the happiness he could get.

Arlene fluttered around anxiously and she was broadcasting so loud, I couldn't help but hear her, Oh, I hope Terry gets back from his fishing trip tonight. I really need to talk with him. My brow furrowed, but it wasn't any of my business. Besides, I'd had had a long day and had enough troubles of my own. Since Sam has been gone, we've all taken turns opening the bar and then staying as long as we were needed. Today was my day, and I stayed until close. Thankfully Tara had offered to do my closing work. As I threw my dirty apron into the hamper and grabbed my purse out of Sam's office, I called out to Arlene, Lafayette and Tara, "Bye y'all! Have a good night!"

I made my way to my car, digging through my purse, hunting around for my keys, so I didn't know what was waiting for me until it was too late.

"It's really not very wise to not look around while you're outside alone at night. You never know what sort of creature might be out to get you." I looked up at the unmistakable sound of arrogance that is Eric Northman's voice. His long body was leaning against my car like a GQ model, and his lip was curled up as he grinned at his own little joke. He was right, and I hated that. But as aggravating as he is, he was pretty much my only shot at getting Bill back, so I swallowed my acrid reply and instead focused on the most relevant questions.

"What did you find out? Do you know where he is?"

The grin vanished as his face resumed its usual affected look of boredom. He stood up to his full length, taking a moment to stretch out his long arms. I tried not to notice his rippling pecs underneath his fitted t-shirt and black leather jacket. And, oh, were those man cuts just inside his hips that I saw when his shirt lifted up the tiniest bit? I closed my eyes and shook my head to clear my mind of any lust. It may be the natural reaction of anyone attracted to the male gender, but I still felt bad about those split-seconds. I'm an engaged woman, well, the groom-to-be may not know it yet, but for all intents and purposes I am. After Eric finished his languorous stretch, which no doubt he did to see what my reaction would be, he finally answered my question.

"We should get to your house before we start talking, the forest has eyes." His nostrils flared and his pupils made the tiniest of glances just above me and to my sides. I wasn't sure if he was being serious or not, but who knows, maybe tree sprites exist.

"Get in," I ordered as I started getting into my car myself, if my voice was inpatient, I couldn't help it. Eric's idea of helping me seemed to include as little actual help as possible while causing me the greatest amount of inconvenience possible. He grunted in reply, probably not very thrilled at the idea of fitting his tall frame into my tiny VW Rabbit.

As my engine choked the first time I tried to turn it over, Eric's voice rang out with annoyance, "Why are you driving this, this…" His voice was drowned out as the engine started up the second time I tried and I threw the car into drive, and drove faster than I have in a long time, my eyes glaring at the road ahead. As much as I needed him, I still couldn't wait to get away from the ego-tripping jerk. I had to slow down when I got to my gravel driveway, the gravel wasn't even enough for me to go very quickly without doing even more damage.

Again, that irritating voice piped up, "Why haven't you fixed your driveway, yet? Didn't the direct deposit clear for your work in Dallas?"

By that point, we were already at my house and the car's engine was off. I started my reply by jumping out of my car, and slamming the door shut. Over the roof of my car I seethed at him, "For your information, Eric," I started before deciding that I couldn't bear to stand still and began stomping towards my front door. "While I was helping you in Dallas, nearly getting raped and murdered, my home was being destroyed from the inside out by some monster." I took a deep breath before continuing, it felt good to vent. "So, no, I haven't been able to re-gravel my driveway, even though it really needs it. And, no, I don't make enough money to drive a nicer car."

"But Bill-"

"Bill, what!?" I couldn't believe he had the gall to interrupt me, and I continued my tirade as stuck my key in the door and opened it, "Do you think I'd let myself be some kind of kept woma-"

And that's when a bullet, aimed right at my heart, exploded from a gun that was at point-blank range. I didn't even have time to react. I just stood there, dumbfounded, wondering about my luck. Wondering why anyone would want to kill me, Sookie Stackhouse, waitress. Wondering what I possibly could have done wrong in my life to end up in this position-the position of someone trying to kill me-yet again. Fortunately for me, Eric didn't seem to be bothered by those sorts of existential questions. He leaped in front of me and took a bullet, right in his torso. I could barely even breathe a sigh of relief before the man in front of me cocked the pistol and aimed at me again.

"Invite me in, Sookie!" Eric's rage broke my reverie.

"You can go in!" it probably wasn't the quickest way I could invite him in, but it was quick enough. He launched himself at the intruder, blocking his shot and taking another bullet to the chest. He wrestled the gun away from him and slid it my way.

"Take the gun, Sookie!" I picked it up quicker than I imagined possible; I guess my sense of self-preservation beat out my shock and my aversion to guns.

I held the pistol in front of me, trying to steady my hands, but not completely succeeding. I watched as Eric and the shirtless man, who's torso was covered in tattoos wrestled on the ground. At one point, the man got free and tried to attack me with his bare hands, but Eric took him down quickly. I tried to reach into the intruder's mind, but like the sight in front of me, it was a snarl of red and black. He must have been a shifter of some kind, but I knew vampires were much stronger so Eric's injuries must have been slowing him down a lot. I started to ask Eric if I should shoot the shifter, but I realized I wouldn't be able to, so I just bit my tongue and watched as Eric roared.

"WHO SENT YOU?"

What do you think? Is this what you imagined based on that clip? What do you think will happen differently/instead? Hit the green button and let me know! I'd love to hear everyone's theories!

And as an aside, I really do wait with bated breath and a constantly refreshing gMail tab open for new reviews. Thank you so much for all your feedback! Helpful criticism is fantastic, raving reviews are wonderful, but even a quick "Nice job" or "Sweet!" brings me great joy.