Crystal Flowers Chapter 1: Part One, a maple story fanfic

Synopsis: Crystal Flowers. The water crashing into the curve of the beach. The sharp blade. A grip, wrapped in a smooth metal net, colored white and clear. At the end is a six pointed crystal, where all the water drops and freezes. This is me.

A/N: Many thanks to marco2050 and my friends for beta-reading this story and making it possible. I can never thank all of you enough for your help, even when I'm being lazy in the past three months. Your patience and virtue will forever be remembered in my heart.

Ok, everyone, enjoy this story, and Happy Early Halloween!

Excerpt from Finding What's Lost:

Speakers from various points of the city screech into life. "Citizens, we have a special announcement. Due to the discovery of pollutants in the air, an earlier than usual monthly check will be made. All citizens are requested to stay indoors until the check up is complete or otherwise face detention." Within the city of Cnorion, several youngsters, who enjoying staying up late, cried in dismay as their fun ended abruptly.

Cnorion was always a busy city. Day and night, it all didn't matter because the people are bored. And when they are bored, they tend to occupy themselves with whatever they can. Why are they bored? It's quite simple. Ever since that day, eight years ago, when the world changed, they haven't been outside the shielded boundaries of Cnorion. And those who left were released into liberated areas.

Or so they thought.

Eight years ago, the citizens were made to believe a GM war happened, when the two fractions, GM Core and GM Elite, couldn't agree on a single term, therefore sparking a conflict that rendered the outside world 'incapable of maintaining life any further'. But among these brainwashed specimens, one of them rejected the aerial drug dispersed when ever there was a 'monthly check'. So he waited on the outskirts of town without crossing over to the forbidden territory.

Then rolling can be heard in the artificial sky.

-Maple Story: Finding What's Lost

Extraction 15 percent complete

"Will she be ok?"

"I don't know. When they sent her, she was pretty battered up."

"What? If we don't save her—"

"Relax, no use panicking before it actually happens. People strive towards life, like it or not. She's built to survive."

I lay my fingers over the transparent orange force field, feeling the electrical sting on my fingers. Glancing over my shoulder a second time, I notice the structures of Cnorion. Cnorion is a vast city built as a safe shell for refugees. The outer layers of the skyscrapers are made from pure metal alloy coated with a dull green paint to resist rust. On the inside are living compartments, painted pure white with one or two windows. A sign somewhere down the road says in big red letters: Do not cross. Stay away from the force field.

Whatever.

Taking a deep breath, I dive my hand into the force field. It tingles like soda candy popping on your tongue, but the fabric of the field is as cool and soft as plastic. I stick my fingers in a little further, then my palms, and finally a whole hand. Then I stop. The invisible hand in the force field was trying to pull me back.

There is no use trying to arm wrestle with it, because it will always win and break your wrist. But there is a strategy to beat it. First you have to pull your hand out, leaving a hole in the force field where your hand was. Then it would try to repair the gap, and that's when the arm is weakest. You have to quickly punch the arm out of the way, and grab whatever is in the other side before you get stuck.

It was not fun if you get stuck in the force field. In the news, a trouble maker named Billy tried to break the rules. Next thing you know, a group of Officials found him, sawed his hand off and gave him a whole year of detention. After that I can never get over the nightmares I have about getting stuck. The fact that I didn't fail over the past year wasn't reassuring at all.

No one in this city actually likes the force field. Sure, it protects us from the outside fumes and all those nasty things. But if you turn it around and look at it differently, this is a prison. It traps people inside so they can't escape. Before I came here, there was a famous case involving the barrier. One citizen, whose name I forgot, expressed his discontent with the ways things are. The trial was short and in the end, he was dumped into the wastelands by the Officials. That was when the signs near the barrier started to pop up, I heard.

Anyways.

I take a deep breath, and clench both of my hands into a fist. Swiftly, I remove my hand and punch straight through the arm with the other. The barrier pops with a soft splat, like a series of popping bubbles. A coldness sweep into my fingers as it land on the rough surfaces of the Outside. I manage to stag some of it before the barrier collapse around my hand. Taking a moment for my hand to un-numb itself, I drop the cold stuff on the metal ground and examine it.

It comes in two different colors. White, like the uniform everyone in Cnorion has to wear, and clear, sort of like the force field but more like plastic. You can never see the cold stuff in Cnorion. It is something that only exists in the Outside. This is how the Outside looks like, I think. White and cool, like my room in the morning. I look hard at the force field, trying to make sense of the Outside. But even if the barrier is clear, the Outside always seems so dark. And Cnorion always is so bright.

For as long as I can remember, back when I was ten, I always thought the Outside is bright, if not brighter than Cnorion. Because there is the sun, and it tries so hard to illuminate the city through the force field. I understand the barrier is clear like glass, but even glass casts a shadow. And if you look closely, there are dark spots in the force field. But it turns out the world is very dark on the Outside. When I was about twelve, I started to fool around with the barrier. Then, just last year, I broke through it and took a glimpse of the darkness. There was lots of cold stuff, but for some reason it is black on the Outside, but white in Cnorion.

Everyday, I experiment with the cold stuff to learn more about it. It is a lot like ice because they both turn into a clear liquid when it is warmed up. Actually, I think it is ice, but it's just that it is Outside ice and not Cnorion ice. Cnorion ice tastes a little bitter. Probably from the stuff they put in it to clean it. But Outside ice tastes clean. Like toothpaste. When you put it in your mouth, it has a minty fresh feeling that starts your day clean. I only tried Outside ice once though. Because the next day, I had a bad cold, and I wasn't able to come up here like I usually do.

If I remember correctly, I came to Cnorion when I was ten. I don't have any memories of those ten years though, except for my name. Shui Jing Hua. The tongue I use to utter my name is so different from the language I was taught. My name sounds refreshing and clear when I say it, but bumpy and metallic when someone else does. I thought my speech might give me a clue about my homeland, but no one, not even Officials, have an idea as to where those words come from. Because of that, I don't know who I was or who my family was.

For as long as I remember, I was an orphan in Cnorion.

Most of the time, whenever I needed help, I have to work it out alone. I don't have friends at all. The closest I'll get to friendship is Jason, an acquaintance. The rest are just people I spend time with. I know I am the quietest student in class and people call it a problem. But how can you call it a problem if you have nothing to talk about? If you want me to say something, tell me what it is, or I can't answer.

People with family talks about so much useless stuff like food and music. And then they expect you to continue the conversation with even more useless stuff like games and boys. It's driving me crazy! The only person I feel comfortable around is Jason. He's an orphan too, so we both don't talk and we're cool with it. But I never ask him for help. I fear that if I do, I would start being like the other people. Being a quiet observer is better than being part of their world.

"Shui Jing," Jason calls from beyond the path. His tennis shoes pound against the metallic ground. I immediately put my finger over my lips and he slows down. "Sorry. Did you get some cold stuff to show me?" Opening my hand, I lift the icy material close to his face. He breathes on it, sending freezing air into my cheeks. For a while, he stares skeptically, bending his lip and lifting his eyebrows, before finally feeling cold stuff for the first time. His fingers quickly retracts when he touch the icy material. "That's it? It's just ice."

"It's not ice! How can you call it that? It's something from the Outside! It's a lot different than Cnorion ice," I protest.

"I don't really see—" Jason begins but is interrupted by a loud screech. The speakers spring into life, with a familiar weekly message. It always says something like "A new place is cleaned, blah blah blah, and these people will be released blah blah blah." I could really care less about going to the Outside. I remained hopeful because Jason never phased from this wish. But that's all in the past now, because with six years gone by, it becomes apparent that only adults get to leave. And once all the adults take all the land, we'll be kept here for life. Jason still listens futilely to the names though, hoping to find out a pattern.

"Citizens of Cnorion, we have an announcement to make. Due to our efforts, a new area has been liberated. The lucky people who will be released are…."

Extraction 18 percent complete

"How's her condition?"

"It's still in critical. I don't think she is going to make it."

"God dammit, how many times have I told you to relax? Everything is going to be fine. She's been in critical for so long! Do you ever wonder why?"

"Um…I don't know. She should've been dead…according to these numbers."

"But yet she is still alive! She's gripping onto life as hard as she can. So we might as well not give up too."

I look out at the rainstorm outside. It's not an Outside rain, though. Every month, Cnorion would rain, and the water would clean the air and the buildings, washing away all the pollution that went in through the holes in the force field. I always wonder. If cold stuff can turn into water, can't rain turn into cold stuff? It would be nice if the cold stuff were raining. But I guess since the water is different, so will the cold stuff.

Hey, I got an idea! I begin drawing the middle, shaping a curve. On the upper portion of the curve, I design a squiggly pattern, the "water" crashing into the curve of the "beach". This would be the sharp blade. The middle of the curve is the grip, as well as the bottom portion, wrapped in a smooth metal net, colored white and clear like the cold stuff. At the end of the bottom is a six pointed crystal, where all the "water" drops and freezes into the cold stuff.

"Are you drawing bows again?" Jason snaps me out of my trance. Usually, during rains, you are not supposed to invite people into your room. At first I did want Jason to get out, because we'll both be sent to the wastelands. But he promised to not get caught and I eventually let go. I'm very grateful to have him here with me during rainy days.

"Yeah." Jason walks over and inspects the work. I love designing bows. They are by far the best weapon. It's easy to use, light, and can have a variety of gimmicks. You can curve it for accuracy, straighten it for speed, add a blade for a melee option, and put anything you want on it, creating a beautiful weapon.

"Whoa, this is so cool! Hey! Can you design me a sword that looks like that? But make it red!"

"Red? Red water?" Red cold stuff. The image of blood pops into my head. I remember getting a cut the first time I received archery lessons. The bow was faulty, so when I released the arrow, it scraped my hand and broke the finger bone. I had to skip lessons for weeks. But during that time I started to draw bows and add my own things to it. By now, I have a whole gallery stashed under my bed.

"Yeah! It would be like the ocean in the sunset!"

"But you don't even remember seeing the sunset over an ocean."

"I know. You have a good imagination though, right? It'll be just like Cnorion during sunset. Everything would be red and yellow like a bonfire, so the water would look like it is burning. Just imagine that!"

"Um…" I think about it for a moment. Well, first the water is clear, that's for sure. But how will it look when it is the sunset? Should I color it red, orange, or yellow? As I try to imagine the picture, the speakers spark into life again.

"Citizens of Cnorion," the speaker says, "we have an announcement to make. Due to our efforts, a new area has been liberated. The lucky people who will be released are…." she read off the names one by one while I continue to finish the drawing. Jason, of course, occupies himself with listening closely to the names. I doodle around, adding shades where appropriate so it'll appear real and three dimensional. It's great and I like it. But there needs to be one more thing… I know I'm missing something.

As I think, the lady continues to reads off the names. "…Shui Jing Hua, Jason Cerge…"

Extraction 19 percent complete

"She is finally out of critical. Phew."

"I told you, as long as you relax, everything will be alright. Now all we need to do is keep watch and she'll awake soon."

"I sure hope so. I can't take any more suspense."

"Ack. I told you! Nothing will go wrong! As long as I'm here, not even the reaper can take away her life."

I look around the room they place me in. It's white, with a white table, and two white chairs. Everything blends in so completely, you wouldn't even notice the table if not for the shadow it casts over the floor. "You must be Shui Jing." The door closes behind me, leaving only me and him inside the white room. He's a tall man—much taller than the tallest guy I've seen—wearing a strange combo of a beanie and sunglasses along with a thick white coat. Emblazed on the top of the sleeve is the symbol of Cnorion.

"Cold stuff," I gasp, seeing piles of piles of the cold, white substance sitting on the shoulders of his overcoat and his beanie. Never before have I seen so much of it in one place. Where in the world did he get all that?

"Hmm? You're talking about this?" He points to the small bit on his shoulders and I nod. "Ahh, you've never seen snow, I forgot." The man brushes as much snow onto the table as possible, and I begin examining it with my fingers. "Did I ever tell you I easily forget things? I'm very busy." He chuckles amusingly, and I look up to see him sitting on the chair opposite of mine.

"My name is Leol Anderson, nice to meet you." Leol sticks his big mitten out, about twice the size of my palms. I take it and feel the cold stuff on it. Some of it was melted into the cloth, leaving a cool wet stain. "Do you like snow?" I nod again. "Are you deaf? Say something. Yes or no?"

"Yes."

"Do you want to see a whole field of endless snow?" My ears perk up. Endless snow? Really? I can barely imagine a handful of it, but an endless amount? How can that even be possible? He notices me wondering and says, "Let's go. I'll show you…. But you are going to need warmer clothing than that. A thicker coat should do." Then a door opens, and a lady brings in the coat. "Thank you beautiful."

"You're welcome." I can tell from her voice she is the lady who makes those annoying weekly announcements in Cnorion. "Um…is there anything else I can do for you?" Her lips quiver and her face glows red like a tomato.

"We're fine for now. You're excused."

"Um…yes sir!"

"Ok, Shui Jing, let's go." He extends a hand out, and I feel the wetness again, except this time, it feels really cold. I've been playing with the snow for too long.

Extraction 20 percent complete

"Would you look at that."

"What? What's wrong? Don't tell me she's in critical again."

"No. Look closely in the tank. She's smiling."

"Smiling? That's not a smile. It's a muscle spasm from being in there for too long."

"No, she is definitely smiling. This is how she smiles."

"Cold stuff!" I run into the snow when he opens the door. All over! All around the place! It is full of cold stuff! Cold stuff everywhere! I take handfuls of it and throw it in the air, feeling it flutter downwards into my hand. It's so comfortable and cool like a cold breeze in the heat of summer. "I can't believe it! Look at all the snow! And…" I look straight into the sky, where even more snow is raining downwards. Some of it is perfect round like your eye, but others were shaped like a crystal. And each one of them looks so different from one another.

I knew it. Cold stuff does fall from the sky like rain.

"Snowflakes. No two of them ever look the same. This one you are holding is special, one of a kind," Leol explains. He opens his mouth and let a piece of snow fall into his tongue.

"No! You can't eat that! Outside snow would make you sick!"

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"I tried some outside snow before and…" No. I can't let him know I was fooling around with the force field.

"And…?"

"Um…never mind, forget I said anything."

"No, this is important, you have to tell me. What's so bad about eating snow? Tell Leol, please. Shui Jing." He bends his legs into a kneeling position until we're face to face with each other.

"Well…" I try to think of a way to say it so he wouldn't know. But nothing comes into mind, and he begins to look very suspicious. Feeling a bit scared, I spill the bean to him. "I took some in my mouth when it was hot and then I got a cold. It was only a little bit so the toxin didn't hurt me too bad."

"Is that so?" He laughs, opening his mouth so big that spit lands on my cheeks. Ew. I wipe my face while he picks a whole handful of snow and eats it.

"No!"

"It's fine. I'm big and strong, so nothing can ever hurt me." Leol smiles at me, and I try my best to smile back, but whenever I try to smile, it's always so small. Jason says I have a scary smile. Well, Jason smiles like a weird, crazy guy, so it's even between us. "Do you know? Snow is the purest form of water in the world. Because when the sun takes it, all the dirty things are removed. In a warmer place, snow turns into rain water, but they can absorb toxins in the air. But snow never absorbs the toxins. Ice is the stainless form of water." He stands up, and put on his shades. "Isn't that right, Shirley?"

"Leol, my name isn't Shirley."

"I'm not talking to you. Come out, Shirley Leblanc!" A head pops up from the snow and I shriek and try to get behind Leol. The head rises up, showing a white coat, the same one I'm wearing. Soon, a whole person is standing where the head was, her flowing brown hair full of cold stuff. "You aren't supposed to be here during this time."

"I'm so sorry, Mr. Anderson. I'll go back quickly." She advert her eyes to the left and quickly scurries away.

"Hey, Shui Jing. Watch this." Leol whispers in my ears before picking up another handful of snow. He quickly packs and shapes it into a ball with his mittens. Then he hurls it towards Shirley, hitting her right into the head with more accuracy than the best archer I've seen.

"What? Who did that?" Leol goes into a laughing fit, holding his stomach and forehead. I find my cheeks muscles stretches up too, until I can't hold it and let out a chuckle. Another ball smack Leol in the face, the snow getting into his eyes, nose, and mouth. It's Shirley turn to laugh now as she picks up another ball and throws it. Leol tries to run, but his large build is too easy a target to miss.

"Hey, kid! Help me out here! I'm being smoked!" I smile at his invitation before picking up a pile of snow. While Shirley is distracted, I fling the ball through the air.

Extraction 21 percent complete

"Here, see. This is how she smiles. I told you so."

"Huh? Why do you have a picture of the both of you?"

"Why not?"

"She is after all—"

"Hey! Don't say that about her! It doesn't matter who she is! She is still a living thing! I treat her like she is my own daughter!"

"Yeah, the both of you do look like father and daughter, a little."

"No, that's not right. My daughter doesn't look anything like her. I have pictures of my family on my laptop, want to see them?"

"That was fun! High five!" Leol raises his palms until it's level to my head. I tilt my head sideways at the gesture, looking closely at the bits of snow stuck on the mitten. "Don't tell me you've never seen a high five before? You're supposed to clap it, you know?" I stare at my palms, red and white from the snow play, then at Leol's hand. Slowly, I bring my hand up and smack it on his mitten. The fabric's bumpy and wet from overuse, but there is still slight heat from under it. "There. How hard was that?" He pats my shoulder and I wince away, closing the distance to the corner of the hallway.

It's a strange place. There are blue walls instead of white. Something like this is unheard of. There is paint in Cnorion, but painting your room is strictly forbidden. You are allowed to write on it, as long as you erase it. But painting it would give you a week in a detention center. I don't know why a rule like that exists. My guess is people really like white in Cnorion.

"Can I call you squirt?" I nod my head. "What are you thinking squirt?"

"Nothing." I whisper.

"Hmm? What? Speak up. I know you're louder than that."

"Nothing." I repeat again, louder, but still very quiet.

"We're going to have to work on your speech." He rubs his temple with his hand, thinking. After a moment of silence, he reach into his coat pocket and takes out an index card. "So, squirt. How do you like Cnorion?" I hesitate on the question for a little. It never crossed my mind that I have to be questioned after breaking free of Cnorion. Why would they do that? Is it because they know I broke one or two rules?

I look at Leol for answers, but it's hard to see his eyes with his shades. All I can see on him is an eager smile and a runny nose. He shifts slightly forward from his seat, pushing me into the corner. "It's ok." I mumble, stressing my voice a little more.

In a moment like this, I really, truly wished Jason would be here. He would sit between me and Leol and answer everything for me. Or at least, if he's as nervous as I am, I would be able to say everything for him. Words would flow out easier for the both of us, because we can always back up each other.

"It's ok? Aww, come on. I need to know more than that. Don't treat me like a stranger. What else is there in Cnorion? What do you like? What don't you like? You got friends you talk to?" I simply look at him blankly, hoping he'll back off with the questions since I'm not going to say anything. If anything, one word might get me and Jason into trouble. "Geez. I give up. I'm not paid to do this." He shoves the note card back into his pocket. "If there's one thing I learned, it's that you're not much of a talker, squirt. Want to hear a joke instead?" Silence. Without my permission he starts himself.

"Pi and i are best friends, but they are having an argument. i was yelling 'Why can't you be rational?' and Pi returned with 'Get real!'" At the last two words he puts his arms in the air with an exaggerated gap in his mouth. I keep myself quiet and look around the room instead. Lips curling up and cheeks reddening to a flush of blood, he lets his arms down. The disappointment in his expression makes me want to laugh, but I hold back knowing it'll make things worse. "You don't get it. Do you, huh?"

He starts explaining the source of his joke. He starts on about circumferences and circles, and then about some weird squiggle and negative numbers. As he talks, I realize, I'm getting everything. I actually understand everything he's talking about even though I've never even heard of terms like this. When he's finally done explaining the i, I can't help but chuckle a little. I don't think it's from the joke, but more from how weird Leol is. He sounds smart, but in actuality, he's a little stupid.

While laughing, I nearly miss the announcer lady walking towards us. Her shoes remind me of the rainstorm right before exiting Cnorion. They both sounds a lot like hands clapping together. The lady focuses her eyes on Leol and gives him a pile of papers. Leol gives her a small thank you and she moves along. He flips through the papers and fixes his shades every now and then.

"Now I see why you're so quiet," he starts, "Over six hundred counts of going off border. You're a pretty bad girl." I flinch at his last two words. How did anyone find out I went off the border? I know Jason wouldn't say anything, the same way I wouldn't say anything. From Leol's frown, I can tell he isn't expecting me to react this way. "Don't worry. Squirt. We wouldn't put you in detention. I would just like to learn a little more about you, that's all."

"Why do you still need to know if I'm in trouble," I blurt out. If not detention, they might just throw me out somewhere else in the wastelands.

"Glad you're not deaf, squirt." He forces a smile on his face. "I'm not supposed to let you know this, but I have to gather information about you to make sure you are eligible to be outside."

"Eligible? Don't you just dump some people out once somewhere is cleaned?"

"Oh no. That's too simple. It's hard to explain, and a lot of things are confidential. Let's just say you are not in trouble of any kind as long as you answer me truthfully, ok?" I think about his offer for a moment.

"Take off those sun glasses." Leol twists his lips as if wondering what I'm up to. In his head, he's weighing the pros and cons before finally removing them. I gasp at his perfect eyes—a deep sapphire color that glow against his pale skin. Compared to the way I look, I feel like nothing. He waves a hand in front of me, bringing me back. I spot a silver and diamond ring on his ungloved hand; it's a sign saying he's married. But to who? "Ok, I'll answer you, on the condition that you answer my questions too."

"I don't see why not. Let's begin. How do you like Cnorion and why?"

"I hate Cnorion, actually," I begin quietly, observing any changes in his eyes. So far, I see he's not reacting in a particular way. He nods and smiles like usual. This probably isn't the first time someone told him that. "I don't really know why. Cnorion is one of those things you just hate. How do you like living in the Outside and why?"

"I haven't been out much, but I have to say, it's a lot better than Cnorion. I think the reason you hate Cnorion is because of oppression. I theorized that people would naturally feel discomfort within a burdened environment regardless of their concept of freedom. What do you think?"

"I don't know. I'm no expert. Can you describe the Outside?"

"Right you are. The Outside is very vast. There are a lot of things on the Outside. Endless deserts, overgrown trees, volcanoes, and the ocean. You probably don't know what I'm even talking about. I can show you someday. Are you fascinated with the Outside?"

"I don't know yet. Is there snow everywhere on the outside?"

"Not really. It snows only in the winter in some places. But I'm guessing you don't even know what winter means. Damn weather control system. Ok, back to topic. Do you have any friends in Cnorion?" Jason comes into mind then, but he's only an acquaintance, and I wouldn't mention him anyway. Then again, if they know I was fooling around with the force field, they might know about Jason going into my room. But how?

"Jason. Are you married?"

"Yeah, I am married. Jason Cerge is your friend. I see he sneaks into your room quite often. What do you both do?"

"We talk sometimes, and sometimes read, and draw. Is the announcer lady your wife?" Leol gives me a confused glare. "The one that gave you those papers just now."

"Oh, her. No. What made you think that?"

"She acts strange around you. Is she always strange?"

"I don't think she's strange. You're over thinking her." He stands up. "Ok, I think we're done here, with all the Q and A. I'm ready to send you."

"No not yet. I need to know how you figure out I was breaking the rules."

"Oh that. We'll talk about it another day, alright? For now, it's my priority to prepare you for a trip."

"Trip? To where?"

"To wherever you are released to."

Extraction 23 percent complete

"Wow, that's your daughter? She looks beautiful!"

"A whore, I know. I really have no control over her, going to nightclubs all the time. It's a matter of when she'll get pregnant and I'll have to fix the mess. Do you plan to marry someone?"

"Of course! Actually I like that girl that dresses up in green."

"Her? She's the President of Cnorion. Trust me, you wouldn't want her."

"What's wrong with her?"

"First, she's way out of your league. Two, she's too pretty. Your daughter will get guys preying over her. You don't want to flip a coin for a son. Science is one thing, luck is another."

I wake up early morning to a loud, audible banging against my door. For the first time since yesterday, I finally got a good look at my room and noticed one thing. It's the exact replica as my room in Cnorion. White as snow. Last night, when I closed my eyes right in spot, Leol told me I could move the furniture around. It's a direct breaking of the rules, so I didn't care. But I now see why he suggested it. I really hated Cnorion. I thought it could be different here. Then again, it's too early to make a judgment. Or maybe I shouldn't hope for too much.

The knocking becomes unbearably loud, and I finally yell for it to stop as I scramble to the door. What I see next is a pair of ponytails hanging on the back, similar to bunny ears. She introduces herself with an edge of authority in her voice. Sarah. I take note to remember the name as she leads me on my daily schedule. Wash my face, brush my teeth, breakfast, classes, lunch, classes again, after class activities, dinner, homework, free time, sleep. It's nearly the same as Cnorion, except much more blocked.

Yesterday's conversation with Leol returns and I find my trust to him and my enthusiasm to be outside plummeting as a roller coaster. Groggily, I dress up in my uniform and follow Sarah to the cafeteria. In line, I take whatever she takes—milk, oats, and a blueberry muffin. It's strange how I always copy the person in front of me, but if I think further, if I didn't do that, I would never be able to choose alone.

I continue to follow Sarah to the tables, finding many people my age grouped together and chatting more than eating. Sarah finds her own place to sit near the middle of the room, and that's when I decide to stop tagging her. These people, they are all similar to the children in Cnorion—they only know about their petty conversational topics and useless gossip.

I hear a call from a table, and a girl starts to wave her hand in the air. Looking left and right for the person she's motioning, it dawns to me when I realize the person she's calling is me. There's an empty table close to me, where I can just eat in peace and quiet. Judging the choices before me, I choose the empty table. People can talk about me being a loner or quiet all they want. I'm more than used to talks about me. A second after I sit down, there are steps across my seat.

"Hi, can I join you," he asks. After realizing I wouldn't answer, he shrugs and pulls the chair, setting his meal in front of me. "I'm Edward. What's your name?" I nearly choke on my muffin when he asked the question.

"Shui Jing," I answer reluctantly, knowing where this conversation is going. He's going to talk about his life here, maybe even his girlfriend, if he has one, and then expect me to talk back. And he wouldn't even be the least bit enjoyable to talk to either. When I don't talk back, he'll crack a joke or two to cheer me up. Except, unlike Leol, it wouldn't be funny. He's too immature to be funny.

"Say that again?"

"Shui Jing," I repeat slowly so he could make out the pronunciation.

"Shui Jing. Did I say it right?" I nod.

"So how's you're first day here?" Looking into his eyes, I see him expecting me to answer. Just like I thought. I stay silent while scooping oats into my mouth, pretending I'm too stuffed to talk. When I finish with breakfast, someone else comes over, her eyes examining me. Before she sits down, I scoop my tray, and follow a few others to the window where you drop the tray off.

During classes, I catch people mumbling rumors about me and pretend not to notice. Again, it's not that I can't stand it, but it really irks me how people can talk pointless subjects about a complete stranger. Didn't I make it clear to them that I don't want them to have anything to do with me?

I spend the class looking at books about Outside. And after that I watch the clock for class to end.

After class ends, activities begin. I follow the students until reaching a wide play ground, the size of several football fields put together. Parts of the area are covered in thick, tall grass with vines overgrowth creating a sort of fencing, and the rest are an arrangement of rocks, bumpy dirt roads, and fluffy clouds. It's the first time I realize, this school is in the sky. But I'm less amazed and more disappointed because of how the day turned out to be.

Edward starts playing ball with a red head boy, tossing it to each other on the clouds. Sarah and the other girl in the cafeteria jump ropes along the grass, reciting nursery rhymes with each skip and hop.

It's something else that I don't get about people. They probably play the same thing over and over for days, weeks, months, and years even, and find it exciting every single time. What's the point of repeatedly throwing a regular ball to one another? Or jumping around all day until your feet hurts and your lungs are out of breath? If it was up to me, I would get my bow and practice my shot all day. At least that can train you to protect yourself against monsters.

I find a bench to sit on and pass my day. If I were back in Cnorion, what would I do now? Sneak to the force field. Get some snow. Examine it with my senses. Somehow, I feel more confined here than in Cnorion. Out on the edge of this island, the land and the clouds would end, and the only way to Outside is to fly.

"Why so lonely," Leol says, creeping into the seat. He must notice my surprise because he says, "I was bringing someone else from Cnorion, and I decided to drop by and say hi."

"Oh," I reply. All of a sudden, I feel a tingle over my body, and my mouth speaks by itself. "Are you bringing Jason?" He fixes his shades and twists his lips slightly.

"How about you answer my question first? I find it very disrespectful." I calm a little remind myself of his question. Why so lonely? How would you know? When you tell people about you, they keep asking for more and more because of their nosiness. Then there would be no stopping them from talking about you and wasting time with pointless conversations. "Didn't you meet any friends?"

"No."

"Why not? They are all nice kids. They don't bite, squirt." I stare to make sure he's not joking.

"Isn't it time you answer my question?"

"You are one hell of a no-nonsense girl, I see. Yeah, I brought Jason. But he wanted it to be a surprise. Try to act a little surprised, even thought I know it's hard for you." I nod in approval. "Since I kind of like you, squirt, I'll be honest with you. I have to get feedback from you about your progress here. Basically, if you don't start making friends, we could send you elsewhere."

"That's fine."

"What? How is that fine? This is the Outside you've wanted to see for so long. We could send you back to Cnorion, you know." I chuckle sarcastically.

"Look at this place. You call this Outside? Where's the desert? Trees? Volcano? Mountains? I looked up all those words, and found that all I have is this. Some dirt, some grass, and some rocks. This is just like some playground in Cnorion, except bigger." His lips open to refute my words, but closes before he says anything. For a moment a smile spread over his lips. Why?

"I bet you would like here better once Jason joins you." I react in surprise but I don't know why. It's like my body and my lips just moved, like a response to pain. Thinking of ways I can bounce it back at him, I realize, it's impossible. Because Leol spoke the truth. It would be better. Not just a little better. A lot better. At the first thought of him, I nearly jumped and then wished it was him transferring over here. I realize, even though we don't converse often, his mere presence holds the both of us together. Spending time in class wouldn't be so much of a chore, I would be able to fend off those prying students, and the world would be colorful for the both of us.

It hurts to know that I actually prefer to be with Jason. And it hurts even more to realize you don't miss someone until you actually lose him.

"Ok, fine. I'll stay. But you have to make this easier for me. I don't want anything personal to do with those nosy foxes." Leol laughs.

"You might change you mind later. Friendship with people can have beautiful effects on someone." I doubt it. "I think I finally get it now. You have a hard time making friends, don't you, squirt? And it's because you think they are bothering you."

"They are," I pause. I've never really told anyone about this besides Jason. But I feel safe telling Leol. Maybe it's his looks, or his attitude. I can't put a finger on it, but it's a cross between idiocy and pure genius. "They keep asking me all these things I'm not even interested in answer. And they talk so much junk; it's enough to fill a wasteland."

"What do they exactly ask you?"

"My name. My first day? What I feel about my teachers. And then they talk about me behind their backs and thinks I can't hear them."

"How about back then? You were quiet to me yesterday. But now we're talking, right? You've made friends with me." I think back to yesterday. A different time. Under different circumstances. But, I guess, I did made friends with him. Whatever it means to be a friend. "You know. When I saw you today, I knew something was different. You're a bit bitter and lonely."

"Bitter?"

"Of course. Do you really think that when people talk to each other, it is trash? People converse to know and understand each other. Because at that moment, they care about you. Doesn't it feel good to have someone care about you?" I think about it, and it dawns to me how true his words are.

"Is this one of your theories?"

"It's something I believe from the bottom of my heart."

"Ok, so, if I am to stay, all I need is to make some friends, right? What do I have to do?" I pretend to sigh to hide my excitement. And nervousness.

"You see those two playing catch. Just go up to them, and ask to join in."

"What if they don't want me to join in?"

"Then I'll be sure to give them a piece of my mind." I feel reassure for a moment, but the feeling dies down as quickly as it starts. And the nervousness returns stronger then ever. But for Leol and Jason and me, I have to do this. Ok. Shui Jing, just calm down and ask. Why am I so nervous? They are perfect strangers to me. "Go on." I growl at Leol and trek up to Edward. He holds the ball in his hand and gleams at me. What is he thinking?

"Can I play," I ask softly.

"Sure, but are you any good at throwing and catching," Edward responds, lightly handing the ball over to me. "Do your best." I roll the object in my hand like it's a twisted piece of metal. This is more or less my first time touching a ball, let alone throwing it. I feel Leol's piercing glaze on my back. Summoning as much force I can, I let go of the ball and it flies through the air. The red head's arms aren't long enough to reach for the ball. "Wow. That's amazing. I wonder how good you are at catching."

I feel a blush coming as the red head gather the ball and glares at me, half amazing and half vengeful. He bites down on his lower lips and heaves the ball like a pea, sending it over the vines. It rolls and rolls until stopping on a cloud. Before Edward can, I go for the ball, carefully stepping on the white cumulus. But it's actually very solid and very safe.

When I reach for the ball, I feel a sudden tug around my body, twisting me around until I stare into the metallic gray eyes. He pushes me forward as he tilts downwards. The next thing I see is Edward, falling off the cloud and landing onto a piece of earth twenty feet below.

Extraction 30 percent complete…GLITCH…GLITCH

"Glitch? What does that mean?"

"Hey, hey. Calm yourself down. Deeps breaths. She's going to be alright."

"How can you be so sure?"

"She wouldn't give up, that's why. Now help me find the problem, alright."

"I hope this doesn't affect her mind."

"Like I said. Chill out. The data is safe."

"Are you excited about picture day?"

"Please don't remind me. I've been dreading this since last week."

"Why?"

"Don't you know? She has a scary smile. I remember back in fifth grade, there was a bunny and it wouldn't let Shui Jing pet her."

"What really?"

"Don't listen to Jason. I think Shui Jing has a wonderful smile. Isn't that right, Mae?"

"Actually, now that Jason brought it up, I've never seen Shui Jing smile."

"Pass the ketchup, please."

"Here you go."

"You know, I've never seen you smile either. What's wrong, Ryan?"

"Shut up. I smile. You just don't notice it, that's all. If there is someone here who can't smile, it's Sonata."

"Smile? I don't even remember his voice. I think the last time he talked was when he said his name during class."

"What do you suppose he does with his free time? I never see him during activities."

"Oh I know! I saw him practicing his sword behind those giant rocks near the grassy field."

"Of course you would know that, Mae. You little stalker. Who else do you prey?"

"Hey! Who are you calling a stalker?"

"Guys. I think we should stop. Look. Shui Jing doesn't like it when we talk about things like this."

"No, it's alright. Guys. Actually, I'm sorry about the other day for screaming out during dinner about your topics. Leol was right to call me too biased. You guys can continue talking. I'm alright with anything really."

"Well um…"

"Pepper, please."

"Here you go."

"Mmm, you know what. This silence is bothering me. Why don't I start things off? What are everybody's dreams?"

"Whoa, Ryan! I think you've been eating too much ketchup!"

"I'm serious. I've been thinking a lot lately about what people want to be after they graduate."

"Are you asking because you can't decide for yourself?"

"I go with the flow. How about you, Teresa?"

"Um…well for now I really want to plant a garden. Full of fresh vegetables. And a coffee house right next to it. It could be a secret base of operations in disguise."

"A coffee house? Really? If that really happens, I want to be part of that."

"Of course, Edward, of course. I much rather spend my time studying further and honing my skills. That's why we're being trained after all."

"That's boring. How about Mae?"

"Mmm, how about undecided? I think I would go for coffee shop."

"Boring. Jason, you better not repeat the shop thing."

"I'll go with the flow for now, just like you. But one day I want to be a really strong person."

"That's a bit prideful for you, Jason."

"There are many things I want to protect, that's all. And there are many things I want to know and only strong people can discover them."

"Archaeology? High five! That's my friend, Jason. How about Shui Jing? What is your dream?"

"My dream? Well. I don't know. But no matter what, I want things to remain the way they are. You are all my friends, so I want things to remain that way forever. This is kind of like a true home to me."

"Nothing can remain the same forever." Ryan says before standing up and bringing his tray with him. I find Mae and Kyra glancing past me, and out of curiosity, I turn back and Leol's walking towards me with a shopping bag in hand. He's smiling at me when dragging a nearby chair next to me. From his stare, I can tell he has a present for me. I would recognize the dazzle in his eyes even if concealed in sunglasses.

"Hello everyone. Hello squirt," Leol says. "So I heard it's going to be picture day with you and all your friends. I went ahead and got you this." He gives the bag to me. From the weight of the bag and the tuff of tissue inside, it's probably a dress for picture day. I can't believe he would do something so highly unnecessary for me. Everything he's done up to now, has been more than I can ever hope for. I can't even start to thank him for bringing me here and introducing me to this new home, and I have to add this to the list of things I need to repay.

I take a deep breath. Before plunging in, I glance around to see everyone else focused on me. Except for Sonata. He's eating like nothing in the world is happening.

"Aren't you going to look at it," Mae begs, almost sounding like a puppy. I dig my hand inside and feel the square edges of a box. Lifting my arm up, I show everyone the baseball, carefully protected by tissue paper.

Extraction 37 percent complete

"There, you see. Everything's fine."

"Phew."

"Hey, want to hear a pizza joke?"

"Sure, ok."

"Naw, it's too cheesy! Get it?"

"Haha!"

"I see you are still up to your lame jokes, Leol."

"Commander Yang!"

"How's the status on her? The president requests an answer."

"Thirty-seven percent, as you can see. Go tell her it'll be done when it's done. You can't rush genius."

The ball lands right into my palms. Leol motions for me to throw it back, and I did as hard as I can. And, much to my surprise, the ball travels over his head and hits the gate on the far side of the play ground. "Hey! Wow!" he exclaims. "I can't believe you actually threw it over me! What have they been feeding you? Steroids?" He laughs while running to the ball, and I laugh too, enjoying the moment.

Ding. Dong.

The bell rings its hallow, deep moan, signaling everyone to head back to class. "Looks like you have to go, squirt. Catch!" Leol tosses the ball close to my feet and waves goodbye. I pack up the ball and my bow without saying another word and hurry on to class. Walking through the familiar path from the playground to the academy, I count the number of days I've been here.

Wow! 174 days! That's…nearly six months! And that also means my sixth month meeting Leol Anderson! Wow. I don't believe it, but he was right! Leol gave me a new home, and a new family, and friends. Ok maybe not family, but everyone is so tight here; we might as well all be brothers and sisters. Everyone here is not like the boring people in Cnorion. All the friends I made don't have a family to depend on, so we understand each other. It doesn't really matter who I am, and where I am from anymore. My home is here, with everybody.

"Alright class," the teacher begins right as I reach the front steps, "since tomorrow is graduation, if someone can answer this question, everyone is dismissed early." She pauses and flips her green hair backwards, showing her intimidating eyes. You can always count on her to dramatic pause and catch everyone's attention in the most terrifying way. "But if you get this wrong, afterschool practices for everyone!" I hurry over to my seat near the window.

"Ok, we get it! Just start already!" Ryan says from the back of the room, his expression distorted with forehead lines of impatience and creased lips of anger. "Come on! Give me the best you got!" The teacher stares straight into his eyes and her index finger runs over her lips. Whenever she's doing that it means she'll discard her question and think of something harder. Everyone in the room moans then, the loudest being big-mouthed Mae. Except for me. I don't moan. I'm happy knowing I belong in this class and all the other classes and with all my ninety-three brothers and sisters.

"There are five people trapped within the cave. One is your leader. Two is the goal of the mission, the person you are trying to escort. Three is an injured teammate. Four is your best friend. And five is you. A wave of enemies is waiting outside to ambush your team. The only way to survive is to choose two members of the team to act as a decoy. Who would be the best two to choose?" Dramatic pause. Everyone in the room looks around, hoping someone might have a smart answer. Sean raises his hands.

"Um, miss. How do you know there needs to be two decoys? Wouldn't one be enough? And how about reinforcements?" he answers, smiling with cocky content. The teacher looks at him angrily, but it is usually hard to tell—her blank expression stays the same whether she is happy or sad or angry or perhaps even in love. There is one subtle clue. If you look closely at her eyes you can kind of tell what she's thinking.

"Just for that, Sean, you're going to stay for afterschool." Sean's smile changes into an upside-down rainbow. "Remember class, there is no right answer, but there is a best answer. And you must also state your reason for your two choices." I look across from my seat, at Mae. She looks back, begging me to say something.

Well, let's see. It would be hard to think about this if you have no idea who everyone is, except you. So… The leader is the teacher. The escort is…well…let's say the Empress. I'll make Ryan injured, since he always looks for a fight and have scrapes all the time over his arms. My best friend would definitely be Jason.

If I think about it, the teacher never says decoys have to die. So the best two should go, right? More chance of surviving. That would mean the teacher and me. But the leader is important to plan the next move, and Jason would never let me endanger myself. And since the teacher hates Ryan for talking over her everyday in class, she'll make him the one. After all, an injured person is a resource eating worm to her. So Ryan and Jason? No, Jason wouldn't let an injured person go!

"Hey miss! I got it!" Ryan waves both of his hands in the air violently to catch everyone's attention. "We'll have the leader and the escort go! The leader would negotiate a deal and hand over the escort! And while they are negotiating, everyone can sneak out! Then the leader could teleport the escort away or something!"

"That's an interesting answer, Ryan." She puts her fingers over her lips again, to make it seem like she's pondering. The teacher never ponders—she only thinks of schemes to torture us. "Ok class, you are all dismissed." She smiles happily, like she is content with his answer—she's never content with Ryan's answers. "'Cept for Sean and Ryan! Extra time for the both of you!"

"Yay!" Mae screams as the class hurries out the marble door. Everything is marble and clouds and vines in my home. White is such a common color even in my new home; it strains my eyes to see any other color. Ryan's crimson hair, the deep blue of the water fountains, the grey color of clouds when it's raining, and the sharp green of the vast gardens. And one last thing, the easily recognizable blonde of Jason's hair. It's the yucky type of blonde, with too much color and contrast. Too unbearable to get used to.

"Shui Jing!" Jason calls among the crowds of students strangling the hallways. I squeeze through several of my friends, finally reaching the grassy lawn. That strains my eyes too. Ugh. Jason walks towards me. "Got in trouble again?"

"If you know the answer, why do you even ask?" Mae answers. I turn and she's suddenly right next to me. Whenever she walks, she's as quiet as a kitten. My guess is it's her way of compensating for her high, scratchy voice.

"What did Ryan do this time?"

"Same as usual. And Sean's staying with him. Think they'll drive each other crazy?"

"Sean? That son of a gun? He drives everyone crazy." We head down the familiar path down to the coffee shop, our hang right after school. It's not exactly the closest place, which makes it perfect. Not a lot of people visit there after school and you can get exercise to boot. You kinda need it, since everything tastes so sweet there. Just thinking about it makes my mouth water.

At the coffee shop, we are greeted by two familiar employees: Teresa and Edward, the fastest runners in our group of ninety-four. I don't quite remember when they started their part time job, but one thing for sure is that they do it quite well. Employees of the month? Most likely.

I glare at the both of them intently, trying to make out a difference between them. With their bright gray eyes, olive skin, and cheerful attitude, many people, including me, believe they are twins. They even have the same last name, although Garcia is quite common. But even with all this evidence, I still can't believe they would deny their sibling identity. What could be better than having a brother or sister to call your own?

Yeah, ok, whatever.

"Welcome customers. How may I be of service?" Edward says, slightly out of breath. He gives a model's smile, which really makes the girls squeal. Mae, for example, yells so loud a radius of one mile from the store can hear her echoing wails. "The usual?" He adds, knowing full well of our tastes. This, in part, is credited to Teresa, who makes all these seemingly pointless survey questions every weekend, as well as takes notes every now and then while observing people at the park. She explains it as a vast study on human behavior, and not stalking.

"Yeah." Jason answers.

"No, wait, I want to try something new this time." Mae says. "Strawberry green tea for me and a coffee cheesecake."

"Excellent choice, but may I also interest you in our new sky blue ice cream. My treat of course, but the flavor is an absolute chef's secret." Edward beams at me, knowing I still owe him a big favor for saving my life. He's trying to make me his maid or something, and he's willing to add to my guilt one at a time until I crack. Therefore, all these favor's he's been doing. Mae glares at me, like "What? When did you steal Edward?" Shaking off Mae's stare, I refocus on Edward.

"Can we hold on that please?" I ask while he scribbles the orders.

"Why?" Jason asks, completely clueless to the secret, and I plan to keep it that way. If Jason knows, he'll end up in a big fight with Edward and it really hurts to see two family members fight each other…over me.

"Well…"

"No worries, Shui Jing. It's absolutely sugar-free. If it doesn't satisfy you, we'll gladly give you your orders free of charge." Edward slyly saves me. I look into his eye unbelievably. He's willing to go that far just to have me submit to him?

Extraction 39 percent complete

"If you are so discontented with her, tell her personally."

"You think I don't have the guts, do you? She's not right since the first day I met her. We're both on the same level but she never shows respect to me. She keeps kissing that Empress's ass."

"I'm leaving."

"So, you don't like the president?"

"Hells no. Pretty women never listen to a man of science like me. It makes my job so hard. If you are ever going to take my place, be ready to lose that social life of yours."

I wake up in the middle of the night. It's so weird, this sleep disorder I have. One moment I would be dreaming and the next, I'm staring at the dark ceiling in the dead of night. Then I'd have a hard time falling back asleep, usually requiring me to exhaust myself with exercise or something. But that can take upwards to an hour, a horrible waste of time and energy, considering I have a graduation test to complete.

Lifting myself up, a chill runs down my spine when I notice someone right next to my bedside. "Who are you?" I gasp.

"It's me," Jason's familiar voice answers. It is true I gave him a copy of my room key, however weird it is. I'm used to having him wander around in my room in Cnorion, even when I'm not home. But I remember telling him not to come in during the middle of the night. You wouldn't want to mess up right before graduation, right?

"What are you doing here?" I try to hush, but it sounds more like a moan.

"I couldn't sleep. There's a lot in my mind." I stare into his eyes and try to discern his worry. Even in the dark you can usually tell it has something to do with his feelings about his past life and his family. He's predictable that way. "If I'm not bothering you, can I have a minute? I really need your opinion." I contemplate the situation for a moment before thinking "what the heck, it's the night before graduation and I can't sleep either."

"Oh, alright. Go on."

"I've been thinking about this home. I don't think we can trust them."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that, they lied to us. The Outside isn't really polluted, right? We both know that. Everyone knows that by now."

"Yeah, they lied about that. So what? It's a white lie."

"But why lie? Why would they keep us in Cnorion?" Pause. "Don't tell me you never thought of this."

"Well…no, I didn't. Why should I?"

"Because they are hiding something from us! We were raised in Cnorion then suddenly we were brought here and they taught us to read and write and fight. There's something very wrong here!"

"What could be wrong? They gave us a home and food and even a family. You—"

"They're not even your real family! They are kids just like us who's been lied to!"

"So what? You're happy! And I'm happy! Everyone is happy with the way things are! You're being too sensitive!"

"You're being naïve! I'm leaving!" He goes and slams the door, knowing it would attract attention. This is how Jason is when something doesn't go his way. It's his way of attracting attention and sympathy. Well, it sure as hell won't work on me this time! He needs to learn to chill out!

I rest my head down on the smooth pillow and skim my hands over the soft sheets, hoping it might calm me down. So far, it's only making me angrier to think about his words. How can he talk like that about our home? They gave him everything they can: food, water, shelter, family. Is he going to be such a dog and backstab on his family? Argh!

Knock. Knock. "Go away!" I scream at the door, knowing that Ja—wait. He wouldn't knock, he has a key! Quickly, I hurry to the door, and notice a dark figure in front of the door, his hand in mid-knock.

"Got a minute?" he asks. It's Edward.

"Um, how about no?" I answer, slightly agitated, and slam the door. His hand got in the way, and I quickly reopen the door. He jumps up and down in place and swings his injured hand left and right. His other hand covers his mouth, muffling his scream. It's strange for him not to be able to hold the door open with one hand. That means he let me slammed him so I'll pity him. Sigh. Boys. "Ok, what do you want?"

"What do I want? After that I want a lot!" Sigh. I move aside and let him in. Then I check the dark halls, making sure no one saw us.

"So what's 'a lot'?" I ask, closing the door quietly.

"Ok so," he settles on my bed and stretches his legs out like he actually owns it. Can't really blame him though, since all ninety-four rooms look exactly the same. You can move the furniture around to your liking, but most of the time, no one bothers. If I was in Jason's room, I'll probably do the same. "I have a hypothetical question for you."

"Wait, why do you have to ask me? Why not your sister?"

"Because she's not my sister! Get that into your head already! And this is something I can't ask Teresa."

"Why not?"

"Hear the question first, please. So let's say you are my girlfriend—"

"What? Are you asking me out?"

"No…" He moans, his head looking up at the ceiling wearily. "This is hypothetical, remember. So if you were my girlfriend, and you're mad at me, and I don't know why, what can I do to like, make up."

"Well, you have to get me to tell you why I'm mad, and then we can figure out together." His head bobs down in disappointment. Obviously that's not the answer he's looking for.

"You think I didn't try that? She wouldn't tell me anything no matter how much I begged."

"She? Isn't this hypothetical?"

"Shut up, maid." Sigh.

"If you're going to ask for help, be nicer." I wait for him to say "pretty please" or something. After a while I continue, "The thing is you better demand that she tell you or else she's going to be mad at you forever."

"Forever? Won't she forgive me over time?"

"That would depend on what you did. If it's something big and you don't fix it soon, she'll think you can't be trusted forever."

"But I don't know if it was something big!"

"It's hypothetical, right? Well, whatever it is, there are only two choices. Slap her—"

"What?"

"Let me finish."

"Slap her and demand she tell you what is wrong or you can ask her closest friend. If a girl is having problems, she would most likely tell her friends."

"Then, does that mean you know?"

"Why would I know?"

"Because—umm, never mind." Edward stands up, his tired expression now having a little bit of regret over it. "Forget I came here. I really shouldn't have asked you." He sighs. "Sorry for bothering you at the middle of the night. We'll call it even."

Before I can stop him, he rushes out the door. Hmm, he's hiding something. A girlfriend. I just know it. But who could it be? Teresa? Maybe.

Whatever, I'm tired. Too many late night visits.

I rest myself on the bed again, and pull the covers over my legs.

Morning comes like a bothersome bug. I brace myself as Sarah starts her morning round of "knocking on everyone's door until it annoys them." Ugh, just five more minutes. The knock persists on the door, growing noisier by the second. Finally I give up and open that damn door. Waiting for me is the announcer lady from Cnorion. Recently, though, she was transferred to be the manager for the girls, and the last manager took her role. I think the announcer lady is named Renee, but barely anyone mentions her, so it slips off your mind occasionally.

"You have a visitor." Renee announces. She blushes profoundly, explaining why she didn't say her usual "good morning." Leol Anderson is here. "Want me to take you downstairs?" Her voice is shaking so much her raven bun is quivering and her square glasses are shivering. She's hoping for me to say yes.

"Sure." I tell her. We hastily shuffle downstairs to the first level, passing by the boy's floor along the way. Leol stands outside behind the glass and metal door. Leaning next to him, on the rails, is a box as tall and wide as him covered in thick gift wrap. He sees me through the glass and waves. What in the world is in there? A surfboard? Renee treads forward and holds the door open for me.

"Hey squirt. What's wrong? You look like you could scare off a cow." I look shyly at him.

"Terribly sorry! I should've made her clean her face first!" Renee suddenly jumps into the moment.

"Chill out, Reina. Why don't you head back up and take care of the other girls? I need a moment with Shui Jing." Leol reach his palms forward and shuffles my hair, sending the bangs in a messy pattern. Reina looks at me jealously before hurrying back up in her high heel sandals.

I really feel for her, because she's like my aunt, no, my mother. Not the best mother, but she does enough for me to pity her. So hopelessly in love with someone already married. One day, I wish she'll find true love. "So, can you guess what this is?" Leol pats the box and it gives out a hollow sound.

Well, it's big. Over six feet tall. Going by that, I really have no idea. Surfboard? A door? Flat screen TV? An all you can eat buffet? The possibilities were endless.

"Nope," I answer bluntly.

"Aww, come on, that's no fun! Oh alright." He lifts the object off the ground with one hand, twists it horizontally, and places it flat on the tiled earth. "Here, open it." I kneel down and start to undo the wrapping paper. There's no need for modesty, I just rip and tear and shred everything down little by little, until all that remains is cardboard. Carefully I uncover the gift underneath, seeing the object wrapped in more tissue paper. But from the shape I can tell it's a bow.

This time, I do it step by step, revealing it little by little, starting from the top. A glowing gem adorns the origin of the superior wave, its light glistening in rivalry to the sun. The waves start out as dark blue spikes under the beach and then stretch out like the wings of a blue jay. A hard net stretches from where the wave ends, to over the handle, and down to the rest of the bow. There's a space in the net, leaving room to grip the solid foam. The net starts off clear like water and melts into a clean white color, more like vanilla ice cream than snow. But the material that it is made out of expresses a cool breeze similar to ice. At the tip of the bottom is the ice itself: a six pointed snowflake with whiteness in the middle, a five pointed star.

The bow is me. Starting off in the crystal cocoon of Cnorion, and then climbing up the icy edges of my home, then into the open, Outside sea. There I can spread snow everywhere, under the sunny beaches. The whole world would belong to me and my family.

"Oh, oh wow!" I exclaim between laughs. The beauty of it is incredible! Everything sparkles under the sun so real; you swear this is water and ice! It's something off a dream! But this is real, one hundred percent! I can touch it! I can feel it! And I can have it! "Oh my god! I can't believe you did this! You are the best!" I jump up and down, holding my new bow for all to see. There isn't anyone except us but still. This bow is mine!

"Whoa, calm down squirt! Haha." He holds his hand out and pins me down by the shoulder, although my laughter still can't be contained. After a long while, I finally stop, and notice something else shining in the box. Arrows. Bending down and holding one in my hand, I start to compare its weight to its hardness. Light as a feather, but if you observe carefully, it's made seemingly out of steel. "Acer Ferrum Arrows." Leol rests his palms on my right shoulder.

"De Bore-de-ah-ox?" I try to pronounce the text written on the side of the arrows.

"De Bordeaux." Leol corrects. "They are the Stradivari of bow making. It took me a hefty sum to make the bow, but they still won't do it! Until they saw your design. They were too privileged to beg, but I knew they wanted to make it. They said the artist, you, were a genius." I count the number of arrows. One…two…three…four…sixteen.

"Thank you so much!" I stretch my arms to the best of my ability to give him a full embrace. Then I plant a kiss right on his cheeks, emitting a chuckle out of him. "I love you so much!"

"Hey, enough, enough. You still have a graduation test! I'll see you during awards ceremony!"

Extraction 41 percent complete

"According to the report, Shui Jing took test number three. What is it about?"

"Someone hasn't been doing their homework, I see. The test essentially comes in three stages, but the first two is standard procedure. Send some monsters after them and see if they can fend them off. The third is different. It forces them to kill each other, the last one standing wins."

"Don't they live together for months?"

"Yeah, they do."

"So then, they have to kill friends who spent all that time with them. Isn't that a little bit cruel?"

"The test is designed to be that way. It is to give the remaining ones a lesson that in battle there is no family. Shui Jing took it really hard, though."

"Here you go." Ren—Reina hands me the letter. Inside tells you the group of six you are going to be in. But you can expect two groups of five since the ninety-four brothers and sisters aren't perfectly divisible by six. I hurry up and finish my plain oatmeal and the rest of my milk before finding a nice, empty place in the shade. I situate myself on one of the outside chairs, take the letter out and read off the names one by one.

Kyra S. Mendoza.

Ryan Sun.

Shui Jing Hua.

Sonata Aydin.

Teresa B. Garcia.

Jason Cerge.

I feel the intricate golden edges, letting its smoothness soothe my excitement. Wow. I'm probably shoved into the best team there is. Jason: good with a sword, cooperative, my best friend. Teresa: fastest runner out of the whole group because she's a stalker. Ryan, hot headed, strong. Sonata: top swordsman, quiet, balances me out. Kyra: strong-willed, nerdy in a good way unlike Sean.

"Hey guys." A voice calls. I look up and see each one of them flanking me in a circle. Sonata remains quiet while brushing away a wisp of purple hair. His hand lies uncomfortably at his broadsword. It's really hard to tell what he's thinking at all times, but maybe he felt I would be a drag to the group. Kyra on the other hand seems excited to have me, balancing boy and girl to three each. She's a feminist and she has big eyes.

"Look what Leol got me!" I hold up my bow, even though everyone already saw it right before breakfast. It's to demonstrate to Sonata that I'm a force to be reckoned with. I'm going to graduate not because of him, but because of myself! "It's a bow made by masters. Um…de Bordeaux. And I have Acer Ferrum arrows. They're really light and strong!" This seems to have caught Sonata's attention as he turns to face me with a smile. He rarely smiles. The only time he does is when he's proud.

"Ok everybody," Sonata starts, eliciting surprise from everyone in vicinity, "we're going to win this!" He holds his hand high in the air then puts it down in front of me. I put my hand on top and everyone body else follows: Kyra, Jason, Ryan, Teresa. It's weird to do this, and even weirder than Sonata started it, but… I'm with my brothers and sisters and my home and my family. Nothing really matters as long as I'm with them.

Extraction 46 percent complete

"Hey, what are you doing, reading my files?"

"I thought I might be able to help you better if I read some of the files."

"Hmm, well for once, you're being a smart assistant! In that case, read all of this!"

"Careful! It's heavy!"

"Here. All of this by tomorrow."

"What! Wah! I can't get all that done in such a short time!"

"Back in my homeland, I had to finish this in a few hours. You're lucky to have overnight."

I hear the shortness of my breath and the pounding of my legs. No, wait. These sounds aren't from my legs. It's the monster behind me. The growls, the poundings, the sounds of needles popping—all are signs of the beast closing in on my position. I didn't dare turn around, because that little pause is all the thing needs to pummel me with its spiked armor. Covering my left and right is the high cliffs, leaving only one path for me—ahead.

I know I'll run into a wall eventually.

Ok.

So the deal is: I volunteered to decoy the boss for the second test, because I wouldn't want anyone else to do it. Teresa is faster than me, but no one agreed to her because of her playful nature. We all understand she couldn't see death even if it is right in front of her. So it was up to me to act as decoy until the rest can think up of a plan. Nobody was really prepared for how difficult this fight would be.

"Guys," I yell into the earpiece when Jason finally picks up. "How is the plan coming along?"

"It's—" Jason says mid-sentence.

"Watch out," someone interrupts. I hear a loud bang and the subsequent sounds of rocks tumbling down a cliff. The explosion is close by, maybe just right behind me. Jason must be right above me, then, observing me.

"Jason! Are you there?" Scratches. Coughs. Moans. I try my best to make out what they're saying while increasing my pace.

"Teresa—going in—to kill your—hope—I'll rescue Shui Jing! He jumped down!" Huh? Jason jumped? I uncontrollably stop in my tracks and look up only seeing the monster in front of me. The armor clunk as it raises the large arm and pummels me into the solid rocks. My head quakes and as I wait for the shaking to stop, I hear the screeching of metal against metal. A lone shadow standing above the monster swings something against the surface of the armor.

I draw an arrow from the pouch strapped on my leg and shoot without aiming.

"Shui Jing? Hey, keep yourself together!"

"Ja—Jason?" I open my eyes and sense something strange. It's like my body is falling. Taking a glance down, I realize I'm up in the air, but the land below moves farther as my body jerks. Jason's carrying up the cliff. And the monster isn't shooting at us. "Did we win?"

"Oh, I'm so glad you came to. I thought you were gone."

"What's happening," I mumble as he lifts the both of us off the cliff. Three faces—Kyra, Teresa, and Ryan—surround me.

"Sonata switched places with you," Kyra explains.

"Why would he do that," I exclaim. Jason helps me stand up and brings my bow to my hands. After a second or so, my mind clears up and Kyra continues,

"You looked a bit tired, so we decided to switch." I take a look at Jason and immediately tell he's hiding something. Kyra too, I can feel it in her voice. But this is not the time to thinking about this as…

"You have got to be kidding me," someone screams. I turn my attention to Ryan, who somehow moved to the edge of the cliff without me noticing. Teresa pulls him backwards, and a volley of spikes fly into the air and arc randomly around us. The spikes, like a fence, separate me, Jason, and Kyra from Teresa and Ryan. Underneath, I hear and feel the vibrations of the ground.

"What is causing that tremor," Jason asks.

"That monster is climbing the cliff!" Ryan yells, his voice giving away his impatience. "Think of something, Kyra!"

"I got nothing," she simply answers. "Shui Jing, you have anything?" For a moment I think, but nothing comes in except for Sonata's act. He has no reason to save me. Only Jason would do something like that, right? The more I think about it, the more I'm confused about it. But I know I can't let him stay down there. Drawing another arrow, I slip through the spikes and take my first good look at the beast.

Six times the size of Leol, covered in an aqua armor. Down the spine of the back and across the length of the limbs are those spikes, acute and long. But perhaps the deadliest property is the accuracy of every shot. If there is anything that can be defined as invincible, this monster is the incarnation. Ryan's right. It is climbing up the cliff punching its arms into the rocky cliff to get a hold. Every step it takes drives a scar into the dry earth.

Without hesitation, I launch the arrow. It crashes harmlessly on the armor and falls below with a thud. "It's not going to work, Shui Jing," I hear Teresa warns with calm in her voice.

"What else am I supposed to do? If the monster gets up here, we're all toast."

"We can just run. Right, guys?" Teresa suggests, raising her eyebrows. I hear a scratching sound from my earpiece and immediately press it. Over on the other side is a faint voice. Sonata.

"Run? This is a test. There's no running! If you guys aren't going to do anything about it, I will," Ryan screams, looking ready to jump off anytime.

"Are you crazy? You can't fight alone," Jason reasons.

"Quiet! I'm listening to Sonata," I yell, looking at both Jason and Ryan. They watch me half dazed and half concerned. "Ok go on."

"I got it. The weakness is in the spikes. It's holding the armor together. Remove them all at the same time. But soften the joints beforehand. You got all that?"

"Yeah," I say with confidence.

"Tell everyone else that. I'm climbing up the cliff now. Distract it for me." I eye Kyra, indicating to her that I'm done.

"What's up," she inquires, her hands crossed over her chest.

"Sonata got a counter attack. The spikes are nailing the armor onto the beast. So we'll remove them all."

"So it's that simple? I could've thought of that," Ryan breaks in. I look at him adjusting his brass glove and immediately know his intention. He's always the first one to go in, and the first one to get hurt.

"Don't go in," I raise my voice and knock his knuckles. "I can pick it off from afar."

"Throwing a rock at a splinter would only drive it in deeper," Kyra reasons with a proverb. "Ryan is a close range fighter and the most hands-on. I second his decision."

"This isn't some democracy!" I face Kyra and stare at her, trying my best to sway her to my point-of-view. "We can't vote on his life!"

"I don't think Ryan would wait for the casting of the vote." She motions for me to turn to the cliff, and right then, I catch a wisp of redness disappearing off the stony crevice. His yucky blonde hair passes by me too, and this time, I put my hand out to stop him. I would never let him go the same way Ryan did.

"Let go of me," Jason whispers. Kyra and Teresa hold hands.

"Where do you think you're going," I demand to the two girls.

"We're here to take a test, Shui Jing. Not sit around. You can stay here and be safe all you want. You can even take all the credit. But someone has to get the job done eventually," Kyra explains, squinting her eyes. I don't know if she's trying to belittle me somehow or look down on me. But I know, I don't like the way she's been talking lately. "It's simple fact. Don't think about it too much. Teleport." And they depart, leaving me and Jason alone.

"I have to support them," Jason says while wiggling himself free. I stretch my hands out to block his access to the cliff. My mouth instantly moves on its own, out of control.

"I'll support them! You stay right here, where it's far away!"

"I won't watch the battle unfold right in front of me!"

"You can fight on the last test. But this time, it is better if I use my bows and arrows! You'll just hurt yourself if you get too close."

"Didn't you hear it clearly from Kyra? We need to remove the spikes from close range! I have to go, no matter what. You can follow if you want."

"No! I can't let you do that!"

"Why are you being so unreasonable?"

"Because, I won't accept the graduation if something happened to my team!"

"Oh, so it always has to do with that family dream of yours. That you should be the one going in and fighting when everyone else stands around! The longer we wait here, the less support everyone else would get. There's no more time to waste!" At this point, I realize, I can't argue this any longer.

It is true that I wasted too much time arguing this.

"Fine. We'll go together." I tilt my head down in defeat. His two hands rest over my shoulders and I look back up. He's showing me that estranged smile, full of confident and victory. And then something comes into my mind. "But, you have to run if I tell you to."

"I think I can—" He didn't have time to finish the sentence when a sudden noise clatters like cards from a deck flipping. I remember this sound behind me when I was being the decoy. And before I can block it for him, he pushes me into the ground, and the stray spike rips through his hip. Out in the corner of my eye, I see the glow of the monster, before it disappears.

"Tsht. Too late," Kyra's sharply comments. I am about to tell her to heal Jason but stop when I notice blood trickling on the bottom half of her robes. Her breathing comes in uneven waves, like the wind during a storm. Sonata rests unconsciously besides her, wounds riddling across his chest. And sensing my shock, Kyra says, "There was an avalanche. You didn't hear it?"

"I don't have time for that! Bring me down there now," I say with a sudden urge. Ryan and Teresa must be still down there.

"I was planning to do that. I still need to fetch Teresa. She got hit, too."

"Teresa too?" Kyra touches my hand and whispers her magic. In a whoosh, the peaceful and dry landscape of the cliffs transforms into the stony battleground below. Rough stones in colors of rust and marble cover the tight canyon. The first person I spot is Ryan. He's pulling out the spikes little by little, with each removal causing a loud moan from the beast. Another whoosh later, I come to realize, we're the only ones left available to fight. Kyra's gone and Teresa's nowhere to be found.

Knowing the futility of the bow, I discard it between two boulders, and instead pound myself forward at the monster's weakness: the spikes. At the perfect moment, I grip onto the first spike, and pull it, causing a cry from the monster. It whips its body around to flatten us, but I don't move an inch away from the monster. I only continue to pull the spikes out as fast as I can. Yet, it doesn't matter how much I pull or how fast I go, nothing can reverse the flow of blood down Kyra's leg. Nothing can rewind the moment when the avalanche happened.

And nothing can switch me and Jason around, so that I'm the one in physical pain and he's the one holding the grief.

Thinking about the sacrifices of my team, powers my arms to remove all the spikes until one remains. Lodged deeply behind the neck is the last nail holding the armor.

And I didn't notice it sooner—the large arm coming my way with Ryan just right in front of me. The next moment, I can taste the rocks and the dirt as I tumble around. Regaining my balance, I first see Ryan lying on the ground. Then I look at the monster. Eyes deep yellow, like it's trying to pierce into your body, when in fact it is not the eyes, but the spikes that do so. Ryan, Kyra, Jason, Teresa, and Sonata—all suffered from the damage done by this monstrosity.

It angers me that I have to be the one to witness, and not share, the suffering of my family. Feeling the bow besides me, I pull my second Acer Ferrum Arrow and launch it right at the neck. The arrow smashes squarely at the body armor, but nothing more than that. It still lies, intact and standing. That last spike, behind the neck, is keeping it alive.

Damn.

The monster brushes its legs along the ground. It's trying to smash me. And once the hit connects, I'll be stone, cold dead. And we won't pass the test. And we definitely won't be part of the graduating team. I can run, that's true. But in this closed ravine, where can I run to? I'll eventually find myself unable to run any further, and then what? No matter where I go, it'll find me. And I'll die.

I can't die.

I shoot another arrow, this time focusing as much energy as possible, hoping that it'll go through the armor somehow. But the thought quickly dissolves when nothing happens. No wound. Not even a scratch. As I'm about to give up, I see it. The monster roars and trashes as the armor itself shake apart. I can see a little of it. The redness of its skin. This is it. A clear shot!

Once I release the arrow, it'll be over!

And then I release the arrow. It speeds across the ravine and lands deeply through the neck, ending its life. The beast leans forward and falls on the ground with a thud. Behind the body, stands Jason, the last spike in his hand. Kyra's leaning on a smooth, round boulder and giving me a thumb up. It takes me a second to apprehend the situation. They must've teleported down here. Jason must've convinced her to do so.

"Jason," I try to whisper, but the words come out more baby-ish than I thought.

I can smell the bitterness in Kyra's blood from this distance, and I can feel this pain in my back, in my legs, in my shoulders. And Jason gives me a nod before falling from his own tiredness. It takes me a moment to analyze the result. Ryan's broken ribs. Kyra's bleeding legs. Jason's wound. Sonata and Teresa above us. But it's at least over…no. It isn't.

There's a final test. If it's anything like the second test, then we're done for. I'm the only one left who can battle.

And it is fear that replaces that victorious feeling I had a moment ago.

Before I can really recollect my thoughts, the scratchy speakers act up again. "Congratulations on passing the second test," Reina says. I look around for a sign that we're being watched, but nothing comes into view. "For the third and final test, each team must select one member to step into the nearby portal. We expect you to be as prompt as possible. Everyone have a nice day." I'm the only one who can do it. A glowing circle emerges off the ground in front of the monster, in front of Jason.

One look into his eyes, and I can tell he won't let me get there first. But I know he can't move and he can't do anything about it. It's only logical that I go. "I'm sorry, Jason. I have to do this for my family," I apologize and step into the circle.

"Shui Jing!" Jason screams as light envelopes me. It grows brighter and brighter, covering my eyes from seeing anything anymore. "I—" And then everything goes white.

Extraction 47 percent complete

"Hey, Leol."

"'Sup."

"It says here…You were the one who wrote test number three! Actually you wrote all the tests!"

"Yeah, that's true. What's wrong? Is there some scribble?"

"Oh. No. I just didn't think you'd agreed with this method. Guess I was wrong."

"I wrote it after my daughter started going out. I thought people didn't have values anymore. But that changed when I met Shui Jing. Too bad I couldn't stop her."

"Is something the matter?"

"Sometimes I feel I was the one to push her into now. But, at least, she's still fighting for her life. After this is done, I owe her an apology."

I try my best to pull the weapon out of her body. But if I do, I'll only inflict the same pain the monster faced back in the second test. The hexagonal crystal on the bottom of the bow digs into my thigh. It's freezing me, right here, and washing me away. She slides her glare at me through her pupils as she deteriorates in front of me. And it isn't something I see or hear. The fact is—I can feel her life melting, draining, disappearing. Raining, dropping, gathering, freezing. Dying.

But I can feel more than her death. Everything she's seeing and feeling and hearing and tasting and saying in her head passes through and adhere at the edge. The water grazes the waves of the bow and dances across the frozen web. Sorrow and hatred traps itself, begging to break free. And, prideful, it does. With the impurities finally gone, it receives powers to crush and break and freeze and level and shatter every the last bit of warmth.

"I'm so sorry," I whisper when the first snowflake falls. It shouldn't be this way. "I didn't mean to harm you."

I look into my bow for answers. The impulse underlining the top blocks the amber jewel from shining and melting the ice. It starts out life as frozen blades, purple and not blue, and spread their beauty all across the water's edge, the bow. A net, the chamber, holds all the loneliness and despair, and there it rests, right under the purple sea. Right under the rain. And there it rests the frosted fingers, as sentient as the Angel of Death, upon the frozen life before me. At life's end is the wishing star buried alive by the six-point star. Six, I heard, is a cursed number. And this star is the one that connects me to her. Her pain and mine.

This bow is the weapon that killed Mae. Ice, destructive beauty through isolation.

Why, do you do this to me?

"She's finally dead. Congratulations, you've won," Sarah says between breaths. It takes me all I can not to finish her too. But it takes even more to remember how Mae treated me. How she at the end, fired her arrow not at me, but at Sarah, who was centimeters away from killing me. In Mae's last moment, I choose what she didn't. Killing a friend. As the pieces fix themselves together in my head, I take the weapon closer and closer to Sarah's heart. "Are you going to kill me too, even when I'm dying?" She goes into a hurtful laugh, gurgling bright red blood over the snow, the purest form of water.

"I've been thinking about this home. I don't think we can trust them."

"I told you! Your beliefs are trash. This! This is where it all ends up," Sarah continues.

"I'm saying that, they lied to us. The Outside isn't really polluted, right? We both know that. Everyone knows that by now."

"I've really had enough of your talks."

"But why lie? Why would they keep us in Cnorion? Don't tell me you never thought of this."

"You are a disgusting child. You keep thinking on and on, but you never thought for yourself."

"Because they are hiding something from us! We were raised in Cnorion then suddenly we were brought here and they taught us to read and write and fight. There's something very wrong here!"

"You can go ahead and kill me. Losing against you, I have no regrets."

"They're not even your real family! They are kids just like us who's been lied to!"

"Continue to be with anyone you want. But remember that you're the one who killed me. I'll always remain your enemy!" At the end of her speech, I drill the purple spikes into her heart, ending the life of the Angel of Death.

Or did I?

At death, she flashes her eyes, full of victory. Why are you so happy? I'm the one graduating. Not you! I'll graduate because I killed you. All seven of you! Dead because of me! And your injured teams, too! Stop smiling! Stop laughing! Stop showing me your eyes! Stop dying! Stop living! Stop existing! Stop snowing! Stop! All of this! Stop right now!

Why won't you all stop?

I stop. And I discard the weapon. And I examine the stains on the bow and on the snow. And I find, Sarah's body, repeatedly smashed and scarred and scraped and skinned by a row of spikes, mincing her organs until only fine remains remain.

And Jason, standing in clear view, finds me. And punches me. And pushes me. And while Ryan stops him, yelling, "Why did you kill Mae? Why did you have to kill her? She! She was pregnant! With Edward's child!" He hurts Ryan too, and then hurts me. He pushed me down the hill. Down like snow on clouds. Crumbling utopia.

I remember seeing Edward during a night before an important day. And we talked. Talked about his hypothetical—and now dead, girlfriend. And I finally see something else. But I'm too numb to feel anything anymore.

And as more and more pain adhere at the edge, more and more snow gathers around me. Today, I killed my family.

Today, I lost my home.

Extraction 48 percent complete

"Leol. I think you should take a look at this."

I sit on the white sheets of my bed across from the bow resting diagonally to the chair. It feels so good to just be here and stare at it. All day. There is a feeling that tells you that you exist, and that you live. And that this suffering you have now, is as endless as the water cycle. Sometimes I stay inside for days, moving once every few hours. Reina passes some food three times a day, and I eat it. Only to reject it later. It is magical how feeling like this is. And sleep? I barely sleep now. Every night for the past week, I wake up in the middle of the night. Most of the time, I stare at the ceiling, or if I turn, I see the Angel of Death by the chair. And all these things would go into my head, liberating me from whatever it is I'm feeling.

Once a person has reached a point where food and sleep doesn't provide enough, that person is dying. It's so great to feel that way. It's how Mae felt when I pushed that blade in. Slow and dragged out, the thoughts just swim around until everything shuts down. I want too feel that way too.

"Hey, squirt." I raise my head up, expecting Leol. The sun by the window blinds me, but I can still see Reina moving up to my bed side. "Would you mind handing these letters for me?" I take them without a word, but also without knowing what to do. "One of it is for you. Happy graduation." Oh, so that's what it is about. Scribbled on the envelopes, in Reina's perfect cursive, are their names.

Kyra S. Mendoza.

Ryan Sun.

Sonata Aydin.

Teresa B. Garcia.

Shui Jing Hua.

…

Jason Cerge.

Jason. He'll help me. I know he will. Only he can.

"I think it might be better if you get out of your room and spend time with your team."

"I'll get going, right away. Thanks Reina." I accept the gift graciously and step out of bed.

Into the balcony, I hear the silence. Usually, Sarah, Mae, and some other girls would chat on and on about random topics. I loved those conversations. It was pointless, but I came to love being here, chatting and staying happy. I love the fact that, when you look up from here, you can see the boys' windows in clear view. Jason's right above me and he's always up there listening to us by the window. But he's not there today. Does he still hate me?

"Did you have to kill her?"

"I'll always remain your enemy!"

I shake the thought from my head. It's pointless anyway.

Kyra S. Mendoza. Her room is just down the balcony, at the last door by the stairs. As I head down, I imagine how I should do this. What do I say to her? I didn't see her in the last week. Is she in grief the same way I am? Why else wouldn't she visit me? Well, Kyra is a strong girl. And smart, too. She wouldn't let what I did get to her, right? I know Kyra isn't the type to cry or grief. And it's a definite fact that she doesn't hate anyone or anything. Maybe, all would go well, and she'll be my family. She always had.

Right?

I scan the glass door, finding Kyra in the middle of the room with her hands on the table, and her eyes blank and weary. She positions the knife in a strange way, as if trying to cut her hand. It's strange, and I wonder what's happening. She's so focused on what she's doing, like I'm as invisible as a ghost.

"Kyra." I knock on the glass, but she ignores me as she slides the blade across her wrist. She's committing suicide. "Kyra!" I yell louder this time and bang on the glass. But it's too late—she killed herself in front of me, and it seems as if, she doesn't care about the way I feel anymore. Like I'm not her family. Too pointless to care about.

Her head curves over the back of the chair, and her hands bleed fresh blood. I try pushing the door open, but it's locked from the inside. "Kyra! Kyra!" Dropping the invitations in my hand, I use both fists to pound the door the same way I would pound on a barrier. But no matter how hard I try, this is one barrier that can outwrestle me.

"Out of my way!" Ryan steps in from nowhere and the moment I shift my body around, he smashes himself right through the thick glass. It cracked with an intense noise, and when I look at him, he's covered in shards of glass. Stun, I slowly watch him move to Kyra and lift her in his arms. Now the both of them are bloodied. When Ryan steps through the door again, he glowers and yells, "Get out. No one wants you here."

But, I'm so shock, the only reply I give is, "Why would she do that?" because I really have to know if it has to do with me.

"She lost a dear friend of hers," he grimaces gravely. Ryan doesn't even have to continue. I leave the two letters with him and leave for the boy's floor.

Upstairs, the halls is still painted pure white, with no patterns. There are the darken areas, dark crevices where no sunlight can reach. In the brightest part of the floor, Jason's room, I knock on his door, twice. When no one answers, my body starts to shake. First Kyra and Ryan. And now, Jason? Does he hate me too? Our years of friendship, doesn't it mean at least something?

Moving away from the door, I go to the darkest room, and find the door slightly ajar. Moving it open, I find the place completely empty. Bed sheets cleaned out. Clothes gone. The desk already has a thin layer of dust covering it. What happened? "Big brother isn't here."

"Huh?" I turn and look at the small girl at the doorframe, a large lollipop in her hand. She's only a child, but something about her black overcoat lined with a crisscross of thin silver lines seems weird to me. It is a version of the uniform I've never seem before. The white lines make diamonds. They seem to signify something higher. But the Cnorion symbol is on the upper arm, with only slight changes.

"Big sister, you must be Shui Jing. I'm Ballade." Ballade takes several licks of her lollipop and as soon as her head bobs forward, her hair pin falls off. The raven hair covers over her eyes as she continues to lick stoically. For a moment, she seems like a veiled devil until she pulls the strands back over her ears. "If you want to see Sonata, follow me. I'll take you to big brother." Silently, I trail her out the dorms. She leads me across a long pathway through several trees.

And finally, we arrive at a manor surrounded on all sides by evergreen maples. It's lush mahogany and made in a classical style, reflecting the intricate gates surrounding the complex. In the twilight sun, everything glows in a weird and strange way, but not like a fire. Fire would mean destruction. But this home seems to represent life. Opposite to my modern and white home.

It's the first time I actually seen a brown building. Or for that matter, been in these mysterious woods. "Good job, Ballade," a soft man says when he opens one of the doors to the inside. "I saw you coming at the window, and prepared a treat for you. Gack should have it."

"Big brother Kougi! Yay! He's always the best!" The man makes room for Ballade to go in but when I try to, he pushes me out.

"I'm sorry. Sonata doesn't want to see you at this moment. I only brought you here to meet you. My name is Serenade. Take care to remember that. We'll be seeing each other quite often from now on." I take a last look at the strange, well-mannered man and give him the envelope. He closes the door, leaving me to wonder if we really will see each other again.

With Sonata done, that leaves only Teresa and…Jason. I don't remember seeing them in the dorm. Where could they be? Maybe, they've returned?

Anyways.

I hurry across the same path I came from to the dorms. On the way, I bump into the teacher, and she tells me Teresa is in the graveyard. I don't ever remember hearing or seeing a graveyard. But then she explains: it was created for all the people I've killed on that day. I imagine eighty-eight tombstones arranged in rows and columns. Each one of them would have written records of the friends who were once my family. Except for one—Sarah, who was never my real friend. There would only be one reason for Teresa to be there. Her twin.

With the directions to the graveyard, I arrive there, passing through the flower shop. Within the shop are all these buckets of pure white flowers with too many petals to count. A tag tied to each stem contains its information, and I take a look at the name. Snow Roses, native to El Nath. Thorns are mildly poisonous, while the petals have healing properties. I purchase one with whatever spare money I have before going straight to the stones.

It's a very peaceful and pretty place. Sun down is nearly over and night would overtake the sky. The clouds arrange themselves in a pattern around the sun, maybe like how the tombstones seem to center on the only person there. Teresa stands as motionless as one of the carefully crafted stones. I make my way towards her, the names of two of my friends echoing into my head. Edward. Mae. I'm sorry. A thick clump finds it way in my throat, and I swallow twice on the way to Teresa. But once I'm there, nothing comes into mind. She stares at Edward's picture on the marble grave without blinking, without emotion. After setting the rose upon the tomb, I leave the letter also, for Teresa.

And that leaves only Jason.

Before leaving the graveyard, I glance back at Teresa for a moment. She's kneeling over the grave now, her back to me, shoulder's shaking. And as if we are all still alive, our quickened breathing and silent hushes fill the choir of the peaceful and pretty place. Eighty-eight dead and six alive. The world comes to a stop for just this one moment. And I collapse on the floor, unable to control the memories flooding back, as the chorus continues.

"Hey, squirt," I lean myself on his side. "It's all going to be ok. They'll come to your graduation. You'll all be a family again." And I know, it's impossible, because we are all separated by life and death.

Extraction 49 percent complete

Memory Eclipsed I

"The machine. There's something interesting about it. You invented it, right? Hey, what's that…?"

Jason was nowhere to be found, and no one knew where he was. He vanished in one day. In the end, no one else got the certificate in the awards ceremony except for me. Leol was also the only one in the audience, supporting me with applause when I went up to the stage. When the teachers, Reina, and some other people I never met dispersed, Leol and I remained in the auditorium. He asked me a few questions and I asked my own questions, similar to when we first met each other. He was calm and patient and I answered everything as truthfully as I could. And at last, I took his offer.

"Shui Jing? What's wrong? Please respond," Leol says into the speaker. I twist around and see him through the glass. He's wearing the same beanie and sunglasses, and still smiles the same way. Leol. Never change, alright?

"I'm just thinking, that's all."

"Oh, alright. Are you ready, squirt?"

"I'm wearing three layers! I'll be fine!"

"It's still cold in the chamber. I wouldn't want anything to go wrong."

"I believe in you, Leol! No worries." Truth is, I am a little worried. But it's useless because I wouldn't turn back. Not now, not to those painful times and memories. I walk forward.

The chamber slides shut immediately. He's right. It is very cold. But I'll take it. It's ok to feel cold. And sleepy… And…

The last thing I feel within me is a final rush of waves, dancing down my cheek skin, and freezing in the subzero temperatures of the chamber. Ice. So beautiful, and so deadly. Just like diamond…

Extraction 50 percent complete

Memory Eclipsed I

"Her cheeks! They're freezing!"

"No, that's just her crying."

"That can't be possible! Isn't this just a fluctuation of her powers?"

"This phenomenon happened before, during the DEAMer process. It's because of her genetic disorder, causing her sleep disorder. She's awake and at the same time she's asleep. She's aware."

"So she's awake during the DEAMer process? Isn't that very painful! She was in subzero degrees! Isn't this wrong?"

"Shui Jing always had an affinity for coldness."

"That's not the point! Won't she die from the pain?"

"But she didn't, right?"

"Still… I find that very disturbing."

"Would you shut up? I'm thinking right now."

"What is it?"

"What else can it be? There's something fishy going on. A missing piece of the puzzle about her. I need to find it before the extraction completes."

"S...Should I bring all the files?"

"No. I personally wrote them. I still remember it clearly in my head… Don't worry, Shui Jing. I'll find it for you."

A/N: And so ends the first half of Shui Jing's story. When will I write the other half? So far I only have a beginning and ending in mind. Once the rest of the ideas and themes sink in, I'll begin.

Finding What's Lost is another story I wrote last year that indirectly connects to this story, so I just put an appropriate quote in.

Anyways, if you read this far, put some of your favorite sentences/quotes from Shui Jing's story in the review. Thanks everyone!