Title explains it all. 'Nuff said.
JUST PLAIN WEIRD
by Benjamin T. Kitsune
*Link is walking through Clock Town, looking around.*
Link: I'm bored. I need to kill time. What to do? What to do? What to do? Tatl, just when is it that the postman goes on his deliverly run again?
Tatl: *rolls eyes, but Link cannot see them because of her yellow light.* Around 3:00. Why?
Link: It's just that I need something to do, and that it's only 11:00, and since the postman won't go on his run until 3:00 and I need to kill some time and I am very bored and I don't wanna look at the moon because it's big and it's scary and I don't like that snarl and I swear it just a made a face at me!
Tatl: The moon made a face at you?
Link: Yes, look up!
*Tatl raises her head, to see the moon snarling at them both. It's face does not change whatsoever. Tatl looks down at Link, but at that second the moon suddenly sticks it's tounge out and closes one eye.*
Link: See? It did it again!
*Tatl's head instantly snaps up to look at the moon. The moon has resumed it's ever-constant snarl.*
Tatl: Link, I think you need to see a doctor.
Link: WHAT!? I'm not going to see some shrink!
Tatl: Whatever. Why don't we go buy some things? You're running low on arrows as it is.
*Tatl flies to West Clock Town, and Link follows, but he takes one last gaze at the moon. It suddenly smiles diabolicly at him and winks. Link's eyes go wide.*
Link: TATL! The moon winked at me!
Tatl: Goodness! First you think the moon's making faces at you, and now it's winking! What next? The moon suddenly growing arms and legs and doing the can-can?
*Link looks very disturbed at that thought.*
Link: Let's.....just go, alright?
*Link runs off-screen. Tatl is left, clicking her tounge.*
Tatl: Poor child......
*Tatl follows Link off-screen.*
*********************************************************************************************************************************
*Screen fades in. Young Link is sitting in a chair, reading a rather large book. Suddenly, there is a rather loud moan of pain. Young Link sets his book down on the table and rushes to the door. There, he leads Adult Link into the room.*
Adult Link: The pain is unbearable! No, beyond unbearable! It's.....unendurable!
Young Link: Poor you. Come here. *leads Adult Link toward a dentist's chair and sits him down in it.*
Adult Link: What have I done to deserve this pain!? The goddesses must be dropping all other duties to punish me!
Young Link: There there. How long has you're suffering lasted?
Adult Link: Seven years!
Young Link: *gives Adult Link a skeptical look.* Seven years?
Adult Link: Since yesterday morning it seems like seven years!
Young Link: Oh. Where does it hurt?
Adult Link: Where DOESN'T it?! It's not just the tooth! It's the whole side of my mouth!
Young Link: Don't worry about it. Besides, it's the age of medical science! It has advanced very far! But first....
*Young Link reaches and begins to pull on the scarf covering Adult Link's head. He tries, but it won't come off. He puts a foot on one armrest and pulls even harder. After a couple of tugs, it comes off. Young Link then gets up and put the scarf to the side and tries to open Adult Link's mouth.*
Young Link: Open up! Open up! If I'm going to ease your pain you must open up!
Adult Link: I'm scared!
Young Link: What is there to be scared about? I just to see it, now open up!
*Adult Link opens his mouth.*
Young Link: Good. Now.....*leans forward* This is just air, allright?
*Adult Link nods. Young Link blows into his mouth. Adult Link lets out a scream of pain and throws Young Link off of him.*
Adult Link: Is this how far medical science has advanced!? Blowing on theeth!?
Young Link: Calm down. You want the pain gone, do you not?
Adult Link: All my life, I wanted things I was never given!
Young: I'm going to have to pull your tooth. A simple matter of surgery really, once the thooth is pulled, the pain will cease to exist!
*Young Link walks up to a table of tools and pulls up a pair of pliers that Adult Link eyes uncomfortably. Young Link then sets them down and goes back over the Adult Link, who still has his mouth open.*
Young Link: Lemme see. *peers into Adult Link's mouth.* Ah yes, I see the little monster. You're a nasty little one, aren't you?
Adult Link: WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? DON'T MAKE FRIENDS WITH IT!! PULL IT OUT!!
Young Link: Don't worry. *Walks over to a the table again and takes a small pair of forceps.*
Adult Link: Be gentle.
Young Link: As gentle as your own mother.
Adult Link: My mother never liked me!
*Young Link sighs and walks back over the Adult Link.*
Younh Link: Now, don't twitch! If you do, the crown will break!
*Young Link starts to get the forceps into Adult Link's mouth when all of sudden, Adult Link reaches up and grabs Young Link's hand!*
Young Link: Hey, what are you doing? Stop that! Let go! Let go I say!
*Adult Link lets go of Young Link's hand. Young Link tries a second attempt, when Adult Link grabs again.*
Young Link: You grabbed my hand again! Let go of it! If I'm going to perform surgery, I need my hand! Now let go! Look, if you don't let go of my hand, I'm going to take my forceps and I'm going to pull your fingers out!
*Young Link smacks Adult Link's hand. Adult Link howls in pain, and Young Link takes this opporitunity to grab the tooth with his forceps. He pulls and pulls but it still remains. Then, Young Link starts backing up, and pulls Adult Link out of the chair! Young Link manages to pull Adult Link halfway across the room, until the tooth is finally pulled out of Adult Link's mouth.*
Young Link: *looks at the tooth.* I did it! I did it! I pulled my first tooth! Hooray!
*Adult Link slowly gets up and Young Link studies the tooth for a second.*
Young Link: Uh oh. The crown broke. The roots are still in there. *shakes finger at Adult Link.* I told you not to twitch!
Adult Link: YOU!! You are the cause of this!
Young Link: Me?
Adult Link: YES, YOU!! YOU!! Compared to you, the thoothache was a joy!
Young Link: What are you talking about? *walks toward Adult Link.*
Adult Link: Keep away from me socerer! *to himself* I gotta get outta here!
*Adult Link tries to get away, but Young Link corners him.*
Young Link: Cease this foolishness! This is a matter of personal pride! Now, get back the chair! We have unfinished buisness to do!
*Young Link chases Adult Link around the room for a moment, until Adult Link slips and falls. Young Link slips and falls right behind him.*
Adult Link: I can't get away.......
Young Link: I failed in my work.......
Adult Link: Come, child. Let us pray for a miracle!
*They both crawl to the front of the screen and begin praying.*
Adult Link: Dear Din, Farore, and Nayru......
Young Link: Dear Goddesses above......
Adult Link: Have pity on this good doctor.
Young Link: Have pity on this poor soul.
Adult Link: Please keep his hands steady.
Young Link: Please keep his mouth open.
Adult Link: Hail the goddesses!
Young Link: Hail the goddesses!
Adult Link: Hail the goddesses!
Young Link: Hail the goddesses!
*While they keep repeating this over and over, Young Link secertly gets the forceps from the table. With each "Hail the goddesses!" Adult Link says, his mouth opens wider and wider. Suddenly, Young Link reaches in with his forceps.......screen fades out.*
*********************************************************************************************************************************
*Link is looking through the telescope. The screen goes as normal as he zooms in on the clock tower top, where the Skull Kid is standing. However, when the Moon's Tear falls, and Link looks back at the Skull Kid, we can see him slapping his rear end, then shake it at him.*
Skull Kid: Yeah, baby! Who's ya daddy? Who's ya daddy?
*We see Link's face.....or most of it. We can see shock, confusion, and that Link zooms in a little more. All of a sudden, Link gasps and sharply turns away from the telescope.*
Link: Oh, goddesses!! I did NOT need to see that!!
*Tatl flies up to the telescope and looks, and shrikes in horror. She then flies under Link's cap. We see her via specail camera, and we zoom in. We can see her slowly rocking back and forth......*
Astronmer: Hmmmm??
*He, too, looks into the telescope.*
Astronmer: Oh, goddesses!!
*The astronmer has a heart attack and dies. Link runs away, screaming......*
*********************************************************************************************************************************
Link: Sucka! You goin' DOWN!!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: I'm catch every Pokèmon in the world! I'm gonna be a Pokèmon Master!!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: I'm off to see the wizard.....the wonder wizard of Oz!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: I'M KING OF THE WORLD!!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: What's 1+1?
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: Is that the only thing you can say?
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: That's the only thing you can say!! *prances around* That's all you can say! That's all you can say!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
*********************************************************************************************************************************
Link: Whadda we gonna do tonight, Tatl? Narf!
Tatl: Same thing we do every night, Linky.....Try to take over the world!
Link: But, isn't the Skull Kid doing that? Poit.
Tatl: Oh dear. You're right. Linky, we must move extra fast!
Link: Why, Tatl?
Tatl: I'm afraid he may beat us to it!
They're Linky, they're Linky and Tatl, Tatl, Tatl, Tatl, Tatl--
Link: Narf!
*********************************************************************************************************************************
Well, that's it. I DO NOT own any of these. Pokèmon, Young Link, Adult Link, the Goddesses, Tatl, Skull Kid, Astronmer, and the Moon are all owned by Nintendo. Pinky and the Brain is owned by the Warner Bros. I don't know who owns "Wizard of Oz" and the "Surgery" skit, and frankly I don't care. I just know that I don't.
Everything else is mine. Flames are not accepted, and I will NOT have retarded reviews saying this was stupid, or pointless becuase I know that perfectly well and I DON'T need some immiture brat pointing out the blatantly obvious!
Other than that, I hope you really enjoyed this. Please Read and Review! ^_^
JUST PLAIN WEIRD
by Benjamin T. Kitsune
*Link is walking through Clock Town, looking around.*
Link: I'm bored. I need to kill time. What to do? What to do? What to do? Tatl, just when is it that the postman goes on his deliverly run again?
Tatl: *rolls eyes, but Link cannot see them because of her yellow light.* Around 3:00. Why?
Link: It's just that I need something to do, and that it's only 11:00, and since the postman won't go on his run until 3:00 and I need to kill some time and I am very bored and I don't wanna look at the moon because it's big and it's scary and I don't like that snarl and I swear it just a made a face at me!
Tatl: The moon made a face at you?
Link: Yes, look up!
*Tatl raises her head, to see the moon snarling at them both. It's face does not change whatsoever. Tatl looks down at Link, but at that second the moon suddenly sticks it's tounge out and closes one eye.*
Link: See? It did it again!
*Tatl's head instantly snaps up to look at the moon. The moon has resumed it's ever-constant snarl.*
Tatl: Link, I think you need to see a doctor.
Link: WHAT!? I'm not going to see some shrink!
Tatl: Whatever. Why don't we go buy some things? You're running low on arrows as it is.
*Tatl flies to West Clock Town, and Link follows, but he takes one last gaze at the moon. It suddenly smiles diabolicly at him and winks. Link's eyes go wide.*
Link: TATL! The moon winked at me!
Tatl: Goodness! First you think the moon's making faces at you, and now it's winking! What next? The moon suddenly growing arms and legs and doing the can-can?
*Link looks very disturbed at that thought.*
Link: Let's.....just go, alright?
*Link runs off-screen. Tatl is left, clicking her tounge.*
Tatl: Poor child......
*Tatl follows Link off-screen.*
*********************************************************************************************************************************
*Screen fades in. Young Link is sitting in a chair, reading a rather large book. Suddenly, there is a rather loud moan of pain. Young Link sets his book down on the table and rushes to the door. There, he leads Adult Link into the room.*
Adult Link: The pain is unbearable! No, beyond unbearable! It's.....unendurable!
Young Link: Poor you. Come here. *leads Adult Link toward a dentist's chair and sits him down in it.*
Adult Link: What have I done to deserve this pain!? The goddesses must be dropping all other duties to punish me!
Young Link: There there. How long has you're suffering lasted?
Adult Link: Seven years!
Young Link: *gives Adult Link a skeptical look.* Seven years?
Adult Link: Since yesterday morning it seems like seven years!
Young Link: Oh. Where does it hurt?
Adult Link: Where DOESN'T it?! It's not just the tooth! It's the whole side of my mouth!
Young Link: Don't worry about it. Besides, it's the age of medical science! It has advanced very far! But first....
*Young Link reaches and begins to pull on the scarf covering Adult Link's head. He tries, but it won't come off. He puts a foot on one armrest and pulls even harder. After a couple of tugs, it comes off. Young Link then gets up and put the scarf to the side and tries to open Adult Link's mouth.*
Young Link: Open up! Open up! If I'm going to ease your pain you must open up!
Adult Link: I'm scared!
Young Link: What is there to be scared about? I just to see it, now open up!
*Adult Link opens his mouth.*
Young Link: Good. Now.....*leans forward* This is just air, allright?
*Adult Link nods. Young Link blows into his mouth. Adult Link lets out a scream of pain and throws Young Link off of him.*
Adult Link: Is this how far medical science has advanced!? Blowing on theeth!?
Young Link: Calm down. You want the pain gone, do you not?
Adult Link: All my life, I wanted things I was never given!
Young: I'm going to have to pull your tooth. A simple matter of surgery really, once the thooth is pulled, the pain will cease to exist!
*Young Link walks up to a table of tools and pulls up a pair of pliers that Adult Link eyes uncomfortably. Young Link then sets them down and goes back over the Adult Link, who still has his mouth open.*
Young Link: Lemme see. *peers into Adult Link's mouth.* Ah yes, I see the little monster. You're a nasty little one, aren't you?
Adult Link: WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? DON'T MAKE FRIENDS WITH IT!! PULL IT OUT!!
Young Link: Don't worry. *Walks over to a the table again and takes a small pair of forceps.*
Adult Link: Be gentle.
Young Link: As gentle as your own mother.
Adult Link: My mother never liked me!
*Young Link sighs and walks back over the Adult Link.*
Younh Link: Now, don't twitch! If you do, the crown will break!
*Young Link starts to get the forceps into Adult Link's mouth when all of sudden, Adult Link reaches up and grabs Young Link's hand!*
Young Link: Hey, what are you doing? Stop that! Let go! Let go I say!
*Adult Link lets go of Young Link's hand. Young Link tries a second attempt, when Adult Link grabs again.*
Young Link: You grabbed my hand again! Let go of it! If I'm going to perform surgery, I need my hand! Now let go! Look, if you don't let go of my hand, I'm going to take my forceps and I'm going to pull your fingers out!
*Young Link smacks Adult Link's hand. Adult Link howls in pain, and Young Link takes this opporitunity to grab the tooth with his forceps. He pulls and pulls but it still remains. Then, Young Link starts backing up, and pulls Adult Link out of the chair! Young Link manages to pull Adult Link halfway across the room, until the tooth is finally pulled out of Adult Link's mouth.*
Young Link: *looks at the tooth.* I did it! I did it! I pulled my first tooth! Hooray!
*Adult Link slowly gets up and Young Link studies the tooth for a second.*
Young Link: Uh oh. The crown broke. The roots are still in there. *shakes finger at Adult Link.* I told you not to twitch!
Adult Link: YOU!! You are the cause of this!
Young Link: Me?
Adult Link: YES, YOU!! YOU!! Compared to you, the thoothache was a joy!
Young Link: What are you talking about? *walks toward Adult Link.*
Adult Link: Keep away from me socerer! *to himself* I gotta get outta here!
*Adult Link tries to get away, but Young Link corners him.*
Young Link: Cease this foolishness! This is a matter of personal pride! Now, get back the chair! We have unfinished buisness to do!
*Young Link chases Adult Link around the room for a moment, until Adult Link slips and falls. Young Link slips and falls right behind him.*
Adult Link: I can't get away.......
Young Link: I failed in my work.......
Adult Link: Come, child. Let us pray for a miracle!
*They both crawl to the front of the screen and begin praying.*
Adult Link: Dear Din, Farore, and Nayru......
Young Link: Dear Goddesses above......
Adult Link: Have pity on this good doctor.
Young Link: Have pity on this poor soul.
Adult Link: Please keep his hands steady.
Young Link: Please keep his mouth open.
Adult Link: Hail the goddesses!
Young Link: Hail the goddesses!
Adult Link: Hail the goddesses!
Young Link: Hail the goddesses!
*While they keep repeating this over and over, Young Link secertly gets the forceps from the table. With each "Hail the goddesses!" Adult Link says, his mouth opens wider and wider. Suddenly, Young Link reaches in with his forceps.......screen fades out.*
*********************************************************************************************************************************
*Link is looking through the telescope. The screen goes as normal as he zooms in on the clock tower top, where the Skull Kid is standing. However, when the Moon's Tear falls, and Link looks back at the Skull Kid, we can see him slapping his rear end, then shake it at him.*
Skull Kid: Yeah, baby! Who's ya daddy? Who's ya daddy?
*We see Link's face.....or most of it. We can see shock, confusion, and that Link zooms in a little more. All of a sudden, Link gasps and sharply turns away from the telescope.*
Link: Oh, goddesses!! I did NOT need to see that!!
*Tatl flies up to the telescope and looks, and shrikes in horror. She then flies under Link's cap. We see her via specail camera, and we zoom in. We can see her slowly rocking back and forth......*
Astronmer: Hmmmm??
*He, too, looks into the telescope.*
Astronmer: Oh, goddesses!!
*The astronmer has a heart attack and dies. Link runs away, screaming......*
*********************************************************************************************************************************
Link: Sucka! You goin' DOWN!!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: I'm catch every Pokèmon in the world! I'm gonna be a Pokèmon Master!!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: I'm off to see the wizard.....the wonder wizard of Oz!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: I'M KING OF THE WORLD!!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: What's 1+1?
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: Is that the only thing you can say?
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
Link: That's the only thing you can say!! *prances around* That's all you can say! That's all you can say!
Skull Kid:.....Well, whatever.
*********************************************************************************************************************************
Link: Whadda we gonna do tonight, Tatl? Narf!
Tatl: Same thing we do every night, Linky.....Try to take over the world!
Link: But, isn't the Skull Kid doing that? Poit.
Tatl: Oh dear. You're right. Linky, we must move extra fast!
Link: Why, Tatl?
Tatl: I'm afraid he may beat us to it!
They're Linky, they're Linky and Tatl, Tatl, Tatl, Tatl, Tatl--
Link: Narf!
*********************************************************************************************************************************
Well, that's it. I DO NOT own any of these. Pokèmon, Young Link, Adult Link, the Goddesses, Tatl, Skull Kid, Astronmer, and the Moon are all owned by Nintendo. Pinky and the Brain is owned by the Warner Bros. I don't know who owns "Wizard of Oz" and the "Surgery" skit, and frankly I don't care. I just know that I don't.
Everything else is mine. Flames are not accepted, and I will NOT have retarded reviews saying this was stupid, or pointless becuase I know that perfectly well and I DON'T need some immiture brat pointing out the blatantly obvious!
Other than that, I hope you really enjoyed this. Please Read and Review! ^_^