This takes place in the Afterlife. Also, this is a just dialogue thing. I know it's been used before, but, eh. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.


"Hey, Prongs, mate. Lily."

"Hi, Padfoot."

"Hi, Sirius. …What do you want?"

"What? Why would you assume that I want something?"

"You can't be serious."

"But I am."

"Not that pun!"

"Alright, Lily, sheesh…"

"So? What do you want, Padfoot?"

"Well, I've been thinking, and-"

"Shocker."

"Be quiet, Lily. Anyway, I've been thinking, and I've come to the conclusion-alliterations."

"Huh?"

"What?"

"I expected this from you, James, but Lily? Really?"

"Spit it out, Black."

"Will do, Lily-Flower. Okay, so, alliterations-I've just realized everyone has names like an alliteration. You know, Minerva McGonagall, Filius Flitwick, Snivellus Snape…"

"Sirius! I told you, his name is Severus."

"Right. Snivellus. That's what I said, right James?"

"Don't argue with him, Lily, it only makes it worse. Now, what was that, Padfoot?"

"Alliterations! Just think-Sniv-alright, Severus Snape, Cho Chang, Peter Pettigrew…"

"Ah. So I'm guessing he's still a sore subject, then?"

"Well think about it, Lily! He sold you and James to Voldemort, he deserves-"

"Padfoot, be quiet. Lily, what he means to say is, he sold us to Voldemort. He sold Harry. And you want us to treat this-this Death Eater kindly?"

"Well when you put it like that…"

"Right, okay, getting off track. As I was saying, think of all the witches and wizards we know with names like alliterations! Like, I know, let's say…er-Bathilda Bagshot."

"You already said that, Padfoot."

"I know. And know it's your turn."

"Well, I know Peter…Lils?"

"Severus Snape."

"Good, good! But you said it incorrectly, Lily. I believe it is, Snivellus."

"Shut up, Sirius. Fine, I'll list another. Um…Cho Chang?"

"What? Lily! Not that girl who broke our son's heart…"

"Well, she was his first kiss, so get over it, James."

"…Yes, Lily…"

"Okay, James, your turn."

"Alright. Um, what about…Gregory Goyle? Don't give me that look, you two. Lily, you came up with Cho, I can say who I want."

"…Fine."

"Okay! My turn. I was thinking Pansy Parkinson…"

"What's with this Slytherin thing we have going on? First Lily says Snape, then I say Goyle, and Sirius…"

"…I said a pit bull."

"…I was going to say Pansy, but that works too…"

"Okay, I'll go now. What about-forgive me, Sirius-Bellatrix Black?"

"…I wish I killed her. I mean, what a lame way to die, really! She just sent a Stunning Curse at me, making me fall into a veil…a veil! What a way to go, huh? I-"

"Sirius?"

"Yes, Prongs?"

"Be quiet."

"Yes, Prongs."

"Okay, my turn. What about…Ted Tonks?"

"Ooo! He married Andy, you know."

"Andy? As in, Andromeda?"

"Yes, Lily, how did you know?"

"You tend to talk from time to time."

"Yes, yes, and Padfoot, if I remember correctly, isn't his daughter Moony's lover…?"

"What? Remus?"

"Yes Lily, where have you been? Living under a rock?"

"Be quiet, Sirius, unlike you I don't spend my time stalking people from the viewing pool…"

"You just as well stalk Harry, from the time you spend staring at his part of the pool."

"Be quiet, Sirius."

"It's true, Lily."

"James!"

"Anyway…who else do we know? Sirius?"

"Erm…what about that Loony girl? Loony Lovegood?"

"Sirius! That's not very nice, she's Harry's friend."

"Yeah, a Loony one."

"Sirius Black…"

"Alright, alright, alright. I'm shutting up now. But just so you know-I don't shut up, I grow up, and-"

"Sirius, you can't grow up, you're dead."

"…Shut up, James."

"Alright, do you know anyone else?"

"Umm…Oh, oh, I know! Pick me, pick me!"

"…Yes, Sirius?"

"Godric Gryffindor!"

"Good job, Sirius."

"Thanks, Prongs."

"Boys…Okay, how about, Rowena Ravenclaw?"

"…Figures you'd go for the brain…"

"What was that, Sirius?"

"Noting, Lily dear. Okay, Jamesie, you?"

"I was thinking…Helga Hufflepuff?"

"…You're going to make me say his name, aren't you?"

"Come on, Sirius. It's just a name."

"Yeah, and so is Voldemort's, but that doesn't really change anything, does it?"

"But the Taboo-"

"Lily…"

"Sorry, Padfoot."

"Hey! You called me Padfoot!"

"Yes, I suppose I did. Anyway, your turn."

"Um…"

"Come on, Sirius, you can do it."

"…Fine. Salazar…Slytherin."

"Good job, Sirius. …Sirius?"

"I think we've actually broken him, Lily."

"I don't get it. What's wrong with saying Slytherin?"

"Well, look at it this way. If your whole family was a group of evil Slytherins while you were a Gryffindor, wouldn't you despise saying it?"

"No."

"Yeah, I don't really get it either. I guess it's a Sirius thing."

"You know, if Sirius was conscious, he would make that pun."

"I know. Sirius? Sirius!"

"…He's out cold. Is that even possible in the Afterlife?"

"…I don't know."


I hope that wasn't complete rubbish. So, review, tell me your thoughts, and, if you may, give me more alliterations! But Siriusly, Has anyone noticed the way J.K's was doing that?

~D