Hey guys, so this is a Rita X Estelle fanfiction, I hope you enjoy it. Please review since I love it when my stories are reviewed. If you have any suggestions on how I can improve it then please don't hesitate to tell me so and I'll do my utmost best to correct it, also if anyone would like to beta-read it then also tell me because I would love to work with you. Okay please enjoy. Also this is the first time I write in the first-person so if I make any mistakes also tell me because I love to improve on my work.

Estelle's POV

My footsteps echo across the castle, it was night-time now and most, if not everyone, had already fallen asleep with me yawning as I walk upon the cold, barren corridor that echoed so eerily of one of the books I read on vampires. It almost felt as though I was literally in the book, I wonder if this was how the character felt as he walked through the vampire's castle, did he dread the moment he would face his opponent? Would he run in fear like I would? Or would he bravely face it as the story suggests and eventually triumph over evil? I had hoped that it was the latter, it was reminiscent of how me, Yuri, Rita and everyone else had formed Brave Vesperia and fought against the Adephagos, saving the world and destroying a great evil though not without its costs in the form of all the world's blastias.

It had been a hard month, many people were simply not ready to take on board the fact that blastias no longer existed, of course the most frequently asked concern was the barrier blastias that would protect the cities from the monsters that roamed Terca Lumieries, however; strangely enough no cities were reported to be attacked by these monsters, in fact even when they were close to the city all they would do was stare at the people before moving on…it was as though it were the barrier blastias themselves that caused the monsters to attack the cities in the first place. It was truly ironic, we thought that by using barrier blastias we would protect our city but instead it made the monsters even more aggressive and when we thought that when the barriers were gone casualties would hit the sky it was in fact as low as the ground. I myself giggled at the irony before another yawn passed from my lips, I really need to get to bed now, as I walked towards my room I noticed Rita's room and smiled at how wonderful of a friend Rita has been to me.

When I had first met her she was arrogant and prideful of herself, she thought she was better than other people, and for a while she was as her abilities as a mage was invaluable to our small group which at the time consisted of only me, Yuri, Repede and Karol; all of us melee-type warriors with me as a healer. However as time went on and more people joined our group she began to become less arrogant and prideful of herself, she was still the undisupted mage of our little group, but she knew she was less experienced in fighting than either Judith or Raven so she began to tone down her attitude and soon became more of a friend to us. However it was the friendship between me and her that blossomed, even before she became tame I had not once stopped to try and make friends with her, I used jokes, trivia and even showed a little of my magic to her…all in an effort to make friends with her. Whether it worked or not was up for debate but now she had become one of my closest friend alongside Yuri, Flynn, and Ioder; the last two names I've personally known since childhood.

As I passed the door I noticed that Rita's door was open; that struck me as strange since I knew that Rita always closed her doors properly and even locked it to prevent people from simply barging in and interrupting her while she was experimenting or doing other things. The last time someone had barged in it resulted in said person being flown out of the window due to one of Rita's other experiments on an alternative for blastias and a good part of the castle being blown to bits as a result, therefore its generally not a good idea to just go into her room unless you have a very good reason to be there, or you're me who Rita doesn't seem to mind and often would stop whatever she was doing just to talk to me; another reason why I love her. So I slightly cocked my head to the side and approached the door, I could then hear the unmistakable sound of a plunger being pulled from a vial followed by a low sob and laboured breathing followed by three words that chilled my heart, "I'm sorry Estelle…" I gasped and immediately threw the door open…

Rita's POV

The candle flickered in and out as moonlight streamed from my window and into my room, I took a bit of crushed Elfroot and carefully tipped it into the vial making the liquid a dark red colour, "Done" I whispered to myself almost gasping at my own voice, "damn it" how the hell could I be scared of my own voice? Oh that's right…I barely heard it in a month, I gave a deep sigh and looked out the window as the vial bubbled under the candle's flame, it would be a while before it was done so I might as well look out the window for some deep thinking before it finishes. It's been a month, one goddamn month, since we've beaten the Adephagos and saved the world…well la-di-dah I might as well have killed myself when that happened, mind you I'm not a suicidal person and I've never even contemplated suicide until recently, but this month have been really tough on a lot of people. The constant complaints of barriers failing, monsters edging closer to towns only to turn away at the last second, prices creeping upwards, the nobles complaining of the commoners, the commoners complaining of the nobles and so on and so on. Yes it has been hard on a lot of people but the heaviest burden lay on my shoulders, amidst all the complaints and anger from the people there was one that was not heard over the clamour, the furious cries from the mages in Aspio, of course it wasn't like anyone should be surprised; after all they were the ones that use blastias the most…I mean it was literally the only job they actually had, studying blastias, and up to recently was mine as well.

I knew that when we defeated the Adephagos there was not going to be a happy reception back in Aspio, I just didn't know how unhappy they would be, the moment I stepped back into Aspio they made it very clear that I was no longer welcomed back and I quickly became an outcast in their eyes. What little friendship I had with a few selected individuals quickly evaporated into nothing more than mere memories, every chance they got they belittled me, abused me both verbally and physically, taunted me and practically made my life in Aspio a living hell. However being who I am I ignored those acts, they were nothing compared to the pain I had to endure while I was fighting against the Adephagos, the scratches, bumps, bruises, sword wounds and the occasional concussion, at least that's what I thought. But, for the second time in my life, I was wrong; the pain was excruciatingly painful…it wasn't the physical part I couldn't handle, that I had loads to practice on, it was the inside that mattered…the emotions, heart, feelings everything that made me who I am today. All of that shattered bit by bit as the taunts and their words stabbed me like a sharp sword until all that remained within me was an empty shell, a former shadow of who I once was, my mind slowly eroded into blanks as I routinely did whatever I did everyday; wake up, wash, do some trivial things, go buy groceries from Halure, go back home, eat and then finally sleep.

Eventually I had enough, I turned around but too quickly as a sudden jolt of pain made me gasp, as I massage my shoulder from a wound made by a broken bottle courtesy of that bastard of a mage Farlden. I gave a deep sigh and stared at the moon and I remembered how beautiful it looked when I gazed upon it the first time after I met Estelle, so bright and round, so beautiful that I almost had to be dragged away from it by Yuri before I gained control of my body…it was fitting that it would be the one to witness my demise. I had planned this for a long time, I gathered all the ingredients whether from the shops or picked by myself, I had read the instructions over and over again burning it into my mind before I burned it to make sure no one would know of my plan then I went to Zaphias and got myself a room in the castle; I then stopped…why did I go to Zaphias? Wouldn't it be better if I ended it in Aspio? It would be a fitting end, I started my life in Aspio and I will end it in Aspio…so then why was I here? Did I want to be saved? Did I not want to die? It would make sense since Estelle would be the one to save me but…it was the middle of the night and no doubt she would be asleep as well so that left her out of the equation since I would be long dead before she even knocked on my door.

So that left the one question as to why I came to Zaphias, I walked towards the window to gaze upon the moon for one final time before I heard the distinct sound of a vial slowly settling before it went still, I turned back and saw that the liquid had turned from dark red to emerald green, just like my eyes, I picked up the vial and swished it around to make sure it was perfect before taking a smell of it, it smelt like putrid fish and decaying flesh, something that anyone, mage or not, would not make…but I wasn't like any other people, I was Rita Mordio; famed mage of Aspio, the title rang hollow in my head as I realised that in the end I was just like ordinary people…with feelings and emotions just not better expressed.

I began to sob as I stared at the vial and my hands began to shake from what I was about to do, could I really go through with this? Could I really kill myself? All because of some words? It was a pathetic excuse but I was already pathetic anyway from the get-go so no surprises there…my eyes drifted towards the letter on my table, next to my goggle, it was addressed to Estelle in red letters the ink just beginning to dry and the quill next to it. I gave a heavy sigh and it racked with pain and sadness, it would be hard on everyone who I knew; Yuri, Karol, Judith, and Raven but it would be the most heaviest on Estelle, my one and only true friend I have left in this world, the one I would give my life for without a second thought…I hope that the letter would at least ease that burden on her gentle and pure soul so that she wouldn't follow me into the afterlife out of guilt and depression…that would be bad on my account. My hands drift towards the cold glass pane for the last time as I stared at the moon, it looked so beautiful and at the same time so sad…just like me except perhaps for the beautiful part but I've never met anyone other than Brave Vesperia and they're not exactly forthcoming in their opinions on my looks.

I swirled the vial around again as I stared at the liquid, I could reconsider this and throw the vial away, perhaps find something else to do but…no, there was too much pain in me and I couldn't be able to function like a normal human being, besides there wasn't anything worth staying for other than Estelle and I, hopefully, had taken care of that problem…a tear went down my cheek and hit the floor as I edged the vial closer to my lips before I utter my final words to the moon, "I'm sorry Estelle" then the door burst open and I turned around…