Why me?
You could hear the usual clattering of dishes, as Colonel Jack O'Neill walked through the commissary and put his tray down at the table ob his 2IC Major Samantha Carter. She looked up shortly and acknowledged the presence of her CO with a short nod and turned back to reading something that was with a very high probability work related.
In reality Sam hid a romance novel behind the folders of her latest mission report, but she'd rather be tortured by Baa'al, than admit to that.
Although her whole demeanor screamed 'leave me alone', Colonel O'Neill was not someone to back away from that, especially when he was bored and decided it was time to bug one of his favorite scientists. "So Carter", he started, "I always wondered, how is it, that Daniel gets all girls and never me, when I am associated with Captain Kirk and Han Solo, for obvious reasons", he finished to his confused 2IC looking at him.
"Sir, you're really asking me this?", Sam stated incredulously. "Well Carter, it might not have come to your attention recently, but you are a woman", he replied sarcastically.
Sam would've loved to say 'Wow, how come I never realized but you did?' , but she bit her lip instead and decided to go for a more diplomatic approach. "Well, with all due respect Sir, if I were you and really wanted an answer to that question, I would go and ask the nurses", she said, trying and failing not to smile, wondering what exactly made him ask this particular question.
Sam turned back to her 'work' and hoped he'd just take the hint and would leave her alone, but she forgot this was Colonel O'Neill, who took way to much pleasure in just continuing to ignore her more or less subtle hints.
"Oh come on Carter, just tell me what it is that Daniel has and I don't" he almost pleaded, though he had way too much fun with all of this. Sam sighed and put her 'work' down and faced her CO. "Do you really want me to answer that question Sir? As a good 2IC I wouldn't want to damage your ego", she asked cheekily.
A bit of surprise and appreciation flickered in his eyes, before he gave her a crooked grin and boasted: "Don't worry Carter there isn't much out there that can damage my ego". Sam just raised her eyebrows in feigned interest, when in reality she thought about her romance novel. "Oh really, do tell Sir?", she mocked.
Jack just rolled his eyes in exasperation and said: " Carter, stay on topic".
"Yes, of course Sir. You want to know what Daniel has that attracts women. Alright first of all Daniel is very sensible and emotional, he looks good, not that you`re not good looking Sir. Another thing is that Daniel has this kind of clumsiness, that women find cute …", she trailed of as she saw the big grin on his face.
"What?", she asked self-consciously, avoiding to look at him. Jack waited till she looked up and wiggled his eyebrows: "You think I`m good-looking?" Sam blushed bright red and suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. "Seriously Sir, that's what you got out of all that I just said?", Sam asked and shook her head.
Jack just grinned: "Don`t worry Carter, I heard what you said, you said I have to act like an idiot to get the girls", "Sir, that's not what I said", Sam protested, but Jack made no attempt whatsoever to acknowledge it. Sam just sighed and asked a question of her own: "If you don`t mind me asking Sir, why are you asking this and me of all people?".
Jack grinned, "well I just wanted to know if you had a thing for Daniel", he replied nonchalantly. Sam looked baffled and commented absentmindedly "well the only person who really has a thing for Daniel is Janet and everybody knows that except for him". "Yeah, well there`s that, but the reason I`m doing this, is because I want you to estimate my appeal with that scientific mind of yours", Jack stated.
"With all due respect Sir, but I don`t think that was in the job description" Sam said, while flushing bright red. Jack gave her a lopsided grin, "it is now Major, so what do you say?". Sam looked him up and down estimating and tried to stall for time. "Sir, doesn`t that fall under the non-fraternization regulation?", she asked. "Oh come on Sam, it`s not like we`re doing anything forbidden", Jack answered, becoming a bit impatient.
Sam just sighed, a bit shocked of his use of her first name and faced her impending doom.
"Well Sir, if this puts your mind at ease. First of all you´re good looking and funny. Secondly you`re a good guy deep down and smarter than you let on, you`re fiercely loyal and protective of the team and I know that you would give your life for all of us. Then there`s the fact that you`re amazing with children and that you can be very charming if you want to…", Sam trailed of as she saw his expression.
"What?", she asked, almost defiant. Jack gave her a genuine smile, stood up and grabbed his now empty tray of the table. "Thanks Carter, I like you too", he said and walked whistling out of the commissary.
Sam just stared at him gob smacked, as the implication of what he just said sunk in. She mentally added to his list of assets his talent of continuously surprising her. She shook her head and resumed her meal, before she could have more inappropriate thoughts of her CO. Luckily she had 'work' to distract her.