A/N: Sorry this story isn't so good. Also, let it be known that I'm not fully committed to it, so this is just kind of a lazy thing for me. Sage went through SO MANY CHANGES, even her name, but the one recurring theme of hers was "these things just don't happen," so I had to keep that in there. BTW, Tai bursts out a line from my favorite character in 16 Candles. It's pretty obvious.

[Setting: Sage's House...]

It was a cool, crisp fall day in Peach Creek - Sage's new home.

She took in the chilly breeze, closing her eyes and smiling. She and her parents had just arrived at their new house in this cul-de-sac. Sage knew that she'd have to get a brand new start with new friends at a new school, but she was willing to take whatever her new life threw at her.

She was kind of a nerd at her old school; she knew she would continue to be here. Sage couldn't help the fact that she was smarter than everyone else. The only people who really accepted her were her friends Tai and Roxie.

Tai was not the smartest person in the world, but the sweetest one you'll ever meet. She'd do anything for her friends, even if it made no sense.

Roxie was the craziest one. She wanted fame, fortune, and most of all, jawbreakers.

Come to think of it, they all loved jawbreakers. But Roxie loved them the most.

"Sage!" She could still almost hear Roxie's voice ringing in her head.

She made her way over to the two suitcases resting on her bed.

"Sage!" The voice grew louder.

Sage's heart beat. Was she delusional? No, she decided, she just missed her friends.

"Sage, get me out of here! Tai's foot is in my face!"

She paused. The voices were coming from her suitcase.

Sage ran and opened one, finding Tai and Roxie scrunched up in the bag. Upon seeing the light of day again, they popped out excitedly, enjoying some much-needed stretching.

"What are you guys doing here?" Sage panicked. "My parents will kill me if they find out that you're here! How are you here?"

"You really need to check your bags before you go, Sage," Roxie grinned, "you might lose something. Right, Tai?"

"No more yanky my wanky," Tai burst out, "the Donger need food!"

"Right. Anyways, where are we again?"

"You guys!" Sage groaned. "You! Can't! Be here!"

"Oh, yes, we can."

She sighed deeply, knowing that she wasn't going to get herself out of this. "We're in Peach Creek."

"Peach Creek." Roxie smiled. "Has a nice ring to it, don't you think, Tai?"

"My mom wears rings all the time!" Tai exclaimed. "But sometimes, she loses them, and then she'll go, 'Where are those f-'"

"Thank you, Tai." Sage interrupted.

"Well, what are we waiting for?" Roxie asked. "Let's go outside, meet our new neighbors!"

As she and Tai headed for the door, Sage stopped them. "Wait!"

They turned around.

"You guys can stay here, under the condition that you hide from my parents totally. I'll bring you breakfast and dinner and all that. Stay in my room in the house unless they're gone and I'll tell you when they come back."

"Jeez, sounds like jail."

"Well, that's what you get for being stowaways, isn't it?"

"Fine."

"We agree to these terms and conditions, Sage!" Tai nodded.

"Good." Sage sighed with relief.

"Now let's go meet the neighbors!" Roxie ran outside, Tai in hand, who was herself dragging Sage.

[Setting: Outside in the cul-de-sac...]

Roxie ran outside, spinning and twirling around happily. "Ah, fresh air!" She grinned. "At last!"

"I believe I can fly!" Tai giggled, running around with her.

Sage shook her head and rolled her eyes. "You guys need to get a grip."

"Come on, Sage, have some fun!" Roxie laughed.

"Fine." She hesitantly stretched her arms out and spun around, feeling herself get looser and looser. "Okay, you guys, maybe you have a point!"

They ran around, spinning and laughing, Sage actually enjoying herself, until she tripped and fell backwards into a giant bowl.

Suddenly, a rope snapped and the bowl shot into the air.

"Sage!" Roxie called nervously.

She landed on the ground, hitting her head hard on a wall. She began to see stars and angels who looked like Tai and Roxie.

"Are you okay? Answer me! What's seven times seven?"

No, she realized, it was them.

"Forty-nine."

"Crap. I thought the collision would make you less smart."

Yes, Sage decided, it was definitely them.

"My catapult!"

"Catapult?" Sage sprung up at the sound of the unfamiliar voice. It was a boy, kind of raspy, very loud. "I was in a catapult?"

She then saw three guys, one in a yellow shirt, one in a green jacket, and one with a red shirt and a ski hat, heading towards her.

"You're the one who screwed up the catapult?!" Yellow Shirt glared at her.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know what was going on! You see, I'm new here and-"

"I don't care! You-wait..." A devilish smirk emerged on his face. "You're new here?"

"Yes. I'm Sage, and these are my friends-"

"Roxie," Roxie stuck her hand out to him, "at your service."

"I am the walrus!" Tai exclaimed.

"She's Tai. Don't mind her."

"You are the walrus?!" Green Jacket repeated. "How do you eat with those tusks?"

Tai's eyes lit up. "I love Fleetwood Mac!"

"What's that?"

"Fleetwood Mac was a band." Sage replied. "It included Lindsey Buckingham and Stevie Nicks, and-"

"You know," Tai interrupted, "I never got why a guy was named Lindsey and a girl was named Stevie!"

"Would you shut up?" Yellow Shirt snapped. "Anyways, I think I've found a way for you to make this whole incident up to us..."

"And what would that be?" Sage inquired.

"Got any money on you?"

"Well, yes, I do, but-"

"Good! We'll show you to the store, and you'll buy us jawbreakers!"

"Jawbreakers?" Roxie shrieked. "I want in, Sage!"

"Me too!" Tai clapped excessively until Roxie closed her hands.

"Guys, I only have enough money for three, if they go for the same price out here."

"Fine." Roxie sulked. "Okay, so who are you guys, anyway?"

"He's Ed," Yellow Shirt pointed to Green Jacket, "he's other Edd, but you can call him Double D," he referred to Ski Hat, "and I'm Eddy."

"Whoa." Tai's eyes widened. "Mental mindblower."

"Eddy, huh?" Roxie raised an eyebrow at him. "Do you know...okay, let's see here. My sister. Um...does your brother-wait, do you have an older brother?"

"Yes."

"Okay, wait, does he know a Krishna?"

"No."

"A Jennifer?"

"No."

"A Mademoiselle Gwyneth Cabot, Exotic Go-Go Dancer of the 1800s?"

"I don't think so."

"Then he must know her by one of her other names." Roxie shrugged. "I give up! Let's go get those freaking jawbreakers!"

"Jawbreakers!" Ed repeated.

He, Roxie, Tai, and Eddy walked away.

"Stupid catapult," Sage grumbled. "Can't get a break..."

"Do you need any help?"

She turned her head to see that Edd was still there. "Oh, hi. Yeah, sure, I guess I could use some help."

He grabbed her hand and helped her up. But he didn't let go.

Sage had only felt like this once in her life. It was when Tai and Roxie first became friends with her. She didn't have any friends, so she thought to herself, "It's not real. I don't have friends now. These things just don't happen."

But looking into this guy's eyes, someone she just met...no. These things just didn't happen.

They just stared at each other for a little while longer until they both snapped back into reality.

Edd quickly yanked his hand away and laughed nervously. "We should be going now, shouldn't we?"

"Yeah, I guess we should." Sage shrugged, not going to allow herself to be disappointed.

[Setting: Candy store...]

"This is depressing." Roxie groaned, sitting outside of the candy store with the Eds, who were enjoying jawbreakers.

"I'm broke." Sage concluded. "My parents will be so mad!"

"So what was with the catapult, anyways?" She asked the Eds.

"It was part of one of our scams." Eddy shrugged.

"Scams?"

"It's just for money. And we only scam the kids in our neighborhood."

"Are they easy to scam?" Roxie grinned.

Eddy narrowed his eyes at her. "If you're thinking of stealing our thunder-"

"What thunder, Mr. Catapult?"

"You're too inexperienced. I've been pulling scams since before I could talk!"

"And how do you know we haven't?"

"But we haven't, Roxie." Sage whispered.

Roxie elbowed her sharply in the ribs. "Go on, tell us! We'd love to hear!"

"You wanna start something, Girl-Whose-Name-Escapes-Me?" Eddy glared.

"Roxie. It's Roxie. And you know it, fool."

"I pity the fool!" Tai stood up angrily.

Sage rolled her eyes.

"Come on, girls, we've got some scamming to do." Roxie pulled Tai away.

"Not if we beat you to it!" Eddy pulled Ed away.

"Sage!"

"Double D!"

"I seriously apologize in advance." Sage got up from where she sat.

"As do I." Edd smiled a bit. "You know, I built that catapult."

"Really? Well, you built it very well. Nearly killed me!"

He turned pale. "Yes, well, I'm terribly sorry about that. I'll-"

She erupted into laughter. "You should've seen your face!"

He lowered his eyes, blushing furiously.

"But seriously," she sighed, "don't let Roxie get to you. Deep down, she means well...some of the time."

He emit a slight chuckle. "I should, um, go." He ran off after his friends.

Sage stood there alone before shuffling down the sidewalk, heading to her house. At least trying to get her allowance back would take her mind off of Edd for a while. These things...they just didn't happen!