Hello, after four years of being gone I am finally back. I will not continue my other story as I stopped liking it. You can read it if you want, but don't expect it to be any good. This story is going to be much cleaner anyways (in terms of South Park standards I mean, so that's not really saying much :P).

Chapter 1

"Yo, get up. We're gonna be late for school."

"Shut up Isaac." I could feel my head spinning as Isaac, my twin brother, was shaking my entire body. "I swear to God, Isaac, I'm gonna punch you." I was actually about to wake up and punch him in the stomach until I saw the clock on the nightstand that read 7:30.

"Ah shit. Alright, Isaac, I'm coming."

I jolted out of bed with a start as the morning sun. I looked out the window and it's a beautiful Wednesday morning. Putting on a black buttonless jacket with a hood, gray ski pants, and gray ski gloves, I went over to the restroom to comb my blonde-brown hair. It's cropped, went down a little past my ears, and while others thought it was a bit unkempt, I didn't care less. I then went downstairs to the kitchen to see a plate of sunny-side-egg, two pieces of toast, and a note beside the plate which read:

I'm going to be away for the day to do work, I won't be back until really late this evening, no earlier than midnight. Dinner is in the red bowl in the refrigerator. Don't stay up too late and be safe. Remember to look out for each other.

Love,

Dad.

I smiled. If there was one thing that my dad beats everyone in South Park in, it's being an actual competent parent. Despite the predicament of leaving a child like myself at home by myself, at least he taught me to take care of myself if things ever happened to him. I can't rely on him all the time. Ever since mom died years ago, I've distanced myself a bit from peers and worked on myself to be a stronger person so I don't fall to things like she did when dealing with her colon cancer. While Isaac has become the opposite, I felt like he's become more and more emotionally fragile, all the more reason I had to stand up to be the strong one. We finished up my breakfast, took my purple backpack full of everything I need, then went off to school.

We don't take the bus to school. First, I already live pretty close to the elementary school, just about two blocks or so east. Second, I don't really like the people who ride the bus anyways. They're often loud, annoying, and rude. They do things like pull each other's hair, pull stupid and malicious pranks like wet willies, sticking gum on each other, and stealing. And then there's Eric Cartman who preaches anti-Semitic shit and whose farts stink up the whole bus. Not to mention, the bus driver was a nasty person who yelled all the time, but she was murdered some time ago. I don't know who drives the school bus since.

The kids like to find someone to pick on to alleviate their boredom. Usually it's Butters Stotch because his demeanor is similar to Isaac's; he's shy, sensitive, and kind-of annoying. Unlike my brother, he'll join along in bullying as well, that prick. Periodically, they'll try to pick on Isaac,

When I got to school I saw a giant commotion at the street; about a hundred or so kids were standing out. They were waiting for something. I don't know why they were standing around. As I got closer, my wonders must've solved themselves because I heard Butters Stotch open his mouth. "Man it's almost time for school to start an' Wendy still isn't here."

"What's going on?" I asked my brother.

"Haven't you heard? Cartman pissed off Wendy Testaburger." Isaac has blonde hair, like I do, but his is always messy, unlike mine which is striaght and kinda like a surfer, but straight. His is comparable to Kenny McCormick's even, if you're lucky enough to catch him out of the hood. He's got the light blue jacket with navy blue pants with a yellow scarf. That yellow scarf has been passed down from Dad. What I've been told many times is that Isaac older than I am by about ten minutes or so.

I rolled my eyes. "Of course I do, I don't live under a rock."

Another voice could be heard, one I'm too familiar with. "Yeah, I don't know what's going on. I mean, I showed up." Eric and Wendy were supposed to fight each other yesterday because Eric said some offensive things about Breast cancer, which I didn't really find surprising at all, he is a sexist asshole after all. However, Eric got into detention by literally taking a dump on Mr. Garrison's desk. There's conspiracy theories going on that Eric only crapped on Garrison's desk to get out of the fight. Personally, I found the part where he took a dump pretty hilarious.

"Where is she? How come Wendy's not showing up for the fight?" This one must be the shrill voice of Bebe Stevens. I bit my lower lip. I never really liked the popular girls in my class. They're all too shallow who enjoy talking shit behind others' backs. One time they made a list that almost made Kyle Broflovski burn the whole school down, although I'd be happy if he did. I don't like school to be honest. Right now I'm learning useless stuff like who Beyonce is, where instead I could actually learn how to get a job or something. Then again, I'm only 10 years old.

"Here she comes!" We all turned. Wendy must've come from the west, and she didn't seem cheerful like her usual self today, since her eyes were glued to the ground as she walked.

Eric begins to strike some gang poses. He's doing all this weird shit with his hands, trying to act all gangster-like. "What's up, Wendy? I thought we were meeting early to fight."

Now Wendy finally takes her eyes off the ground as she looks at Eric. "You know I can't fight you!"

"Why not? You chicken?" Eric just struts around an clucking like a chicken. Wasn't calling someone a chicken an insult when I was like...5 years old?

"I can't fight you because you came crying to my house last night with your mom!" Wendy retorted.

"Pfffft. Aw, that's a doozie, Wendy!" He sneered at Wendy. "You come up with that one on your own?!"

"Hehehe yeah, did you come up with that one on your own?!" Butters often likes to parrot Eric. Ironically, for the amount of times he complains about his "friends" (being Eric and others) being mean to him, Butters can be equally vicious, if not more. One time, he and Stan Marsh made a bullying song and then went on some show and beat up the host out of rage. Not that I actually hate Butters, no, but he's a bit of a hypocrite.

"I ain't frontin' dawg! Let's do this! Let's do it right now, yo." Eric was throwing up some more gangster poses.

"Come on Wendy, kick his ass!" Bebe yelled.

"I can't!" As the words left Wendy's mouth, the school bell rung. "God damn it!" I sighed. Another day to be wasted at school.

"She chickened out!" Butters said. Well not really, since we kinda have to go to class and all right? I heard a few people from the crowd say "Aw man" and similar.

We both just left at that point. We went over into the building to head to class. I put my backpack in my locker, shut the locker door shut. Of course, we ran into our good old friends Garet Jerra and Jenna Stoley. Garet is pretty strong and he's got red hair that sticking up to the sky, with brown eyes, he's got a brown jacket and green pants, while Jenna has purple hair and brown eyes. Her hair is in a single ponytail, and she has a red-pink jacket with purple pants.

I know that Isaac has a "secret" crush on Jenna, as he stammered as he laid eyes on Jenna. "H-hey Jen."

Jenna smiled at Isaac. "Hey Isaac." She turned to me and nodded. "Hey to you too."

I looked to where I came from then turned back to Jenna and Garet. "Man I can't believe Wendy chickened out, Cartman would have totally beat her," Garet complained.

Jenna glared at Garet. "What? Garet what the hell is wrong with you, why are you cheering on a guy to beat up a girl?"

The two of them began to argue while they walked to their classroom. Isaac then turned to me and sighed. I can tell he's still thinking about Jenna, the way he's smiling and blushing and shit. "She's so amazing man."

"You told me this many times, why don't you just ask her out or something?" I suggested.

"Because, I'm just nervous, you know." I hate talking about love. It's kinda cheesy.

"Well Isaac, I gotta go to class now, Mr. Garrison's gonna be mad at me if I'm late one more time."

"Alright, later skater."

"Uh, thanks. You too...skater."

It was more speeches of political problems, and today is the last day of presentations. I was the second one to go, which I went Monday, and my speech was on lack of fundings of prostate cancer, but everyone in the class (especially Wendy) thought I was being misogynistic even though I worked really hard on it, and I made sure there was nothing offensive in it. Mr. Garrison wanted to give me a B+, but the whole class was complaining about my speech, so Mr. Garrison told them to "fuck off," as a responsible teacher should be. That being said, the class probably only hates it because I'm doing the speech; if someone like Kyle were, then there'd be no problems.

I fell a sleep for a bit, then I woke up about an hour or so later to hear that Clyde was wrapping up his speech. "And so, we must all recycle. Every day. Recycling is important, and it will save our planet, Earth. The End." The class applauded politely as Clyde took his seat.

Mr. Garrison clapped as well. "Very nice, Clyde. Okay, we have time for one more report before recess. Who'd like to go?" From the corner of my eye, I saw Eric Cartman raise his hand. Weird. I don't recall Eric ever volunteering to do reports or whatever. And didn't Eric already go? Huh, maybe I was remembering wrong. Perhaps it's just another odd day today. Whatever, that doesn't bother me. "Ok Eric."

Eric walked happily to the front. That is actually weird. I don't recall Eric ever happy to do a report. Except this one time when he made fun of ginger people, but that was more directed at Kyle than anything. Normally I'd be sleeping again, but something was definitely off about Eric, like that speech about ginger people I mentioned before.

Eric smiled and bowed as he cleared his throat. "Thank you. My report today is on breast cancer awareness." That's weird. Didn't Wendy do her report on breast cancer already? And since when did Mr. Garrison ever allow two people to do the same topic? Perhaps I missed the memo. "I do not believe enough is being done, and, like the victims of breast cancer, there's something I'd like to get off my chest." He stifles a laugh. "We all must fight, and hopefully one day, titty cancer will be a distant mammary." He stifles another laugh.

I heard Wendy say something to herself, but it was inaudible. I couldn't hear what she was saying. Irregardless, Eric continued on, this time a poorly-timed joke. "What did the breast cancer say to the Polish monkey?" It wasn't fair really, why is it that my report everyone complains yet Eric's...actually, not many people are really laughing right now.

Mr. Garrison sat up angrily from his chair. "Okay Eric, that's enough you smartass!"

"Why?!" Wendy leaves her chair and she walked up to Eric. "Why are you doing this to me?!" She took him by the collar and began to shake him. "Why won't you just stop?!"

"Wendy, Wendy," Eric said.

Suddenly, the PA system turned on and through the intercom Principal Victoria's voice could be heard. "Wendy Testaburger to the principal's office please? Wendy Testaburger to the principal's office."

"God!" Wendy yelled as she marched out of the classroom. No more than a minute later, the recess bell rang and all of us filed out.

At recess we all sat around at the merry-go-round. It was me, my brother Isaac, Garet, and Jenna, and we were just chatting away about World of Warcraft. It's the game that we still play. Most of the school still plays the game periodically, but let's be honest: the four of us are probably the best players at the school. I'm usually the dedicated healer playing the Druid class because I'm actually really good at healing and my friends for whatever reason aren't willing to heal, but we usually play 3v3s, and the other three like to switch out periodically.

"That was a pretty baller wind shear you did, Isaac," I mentioned. He plays the Shaman class, usually the Enhancement spec. Garet plays a warrior while Jenna plays a mage.

"Hey, come on," Garet said, "I still did top DPS."

"Yeah, after I cycloned everything, ok," I rolled my eyes. "Dude, you know what's bullshit though?"

"What?" Jenna asked.

"My class got super mad at my speech and they asked Mr. Garrison to drop my grade."

"Then what happened," Jenna asked, "And why were they mad, I mean you rehearsed it to me, I thought your speech was pretty good."

"I mean I think I did alright," I reasoned, "but they only hate it because it was me. If it were someone else like Kyle, they'd be all over him. It's all a stupid favoritism game, it doesn't even matter what I say in that class or how good of a job, it's bullshit."

"Wait, what grade did you get?" Garet asked.

"B+." I replied.

"That's not that bad at all," Jenna reassured.

Suddenly I could hear a commotion in the school yard and I could hear Butters yell, "She's coming! She's coming!" I quickly turned my head to the center of the school yard, and sure enough, shit's about to go down.

"Butters, get out of here!" Eric yelled.

"But Wendy's coming to fight you," Butters argued.

"...Huh?" Eric turned towards the school building, and so did I. The side doors fly open and Wendy walks down the steps spoiling for a fight. The students cheer her on as she turns left and heads for the playground. Some girls trail behind her, Bebe being the first among them.

As crowds of students gathered around the fighting couple, I situated ourselves on the merry-go-round. I put my phone away to enjoy the show. Then the playground fell silent. Wendy walks up to Eric and they face off. Eric begins wavering while striking different poses. I can see fear in his eyes; he's panicking, he's afraid of losing to Wendy and being called a fag. That thought actually struck me in my heart, and I shuddered and closed my eyes a bit; it kinda sickens me how sexist my generation can be. I could remember the many times that I was called a fag as Clyde and his friends beat me up. Not that I was homosexual myself, but they call me that because I'm not that strong, you know? Hell, Wendy can probably beat me up. "What- what's up? What what's up?" Eric then leaned over to whisper to Wendy, but we could all hear it. "Wendy, don't forget: I'll tell my mom on you."

"I don't care!" Wendy yelled. Eric looks around. Butters gleefully dances in place waiting for the fight to start

"Um, recess is almost over," Eric tried, "I don't I don't know if there's really time." That's weird. Didn't recess start five minutes ago or something?

I could hear some yelling while Wendy ties her hair in a bun behind her head. "All right, fine Wendy!" Eric took off his jacket and raised his fists. "I'll fight ya you big bully!"

The fighters dance around each other until Wendy lands a right cross. Cartman spins around and falls on his back. Wendy dances around and Cartman stands up, pulling up his pants in the process. Wendy lands two left jabs on Cartman's face, and Cartman finally responds with a right punch. It's strong enough to make Wendy stagger backwards.

"Ohhhhh!" the kids exclaimed. Eric might win this fight if he lays out the punches right. Not like I really care who could win, I don't like either of them.

Eric lands another punch on Wendy's face, then continues with a series of alternating punches, forcing Wendy backwards and into the crowd. Eric lands a punch strong enough to send Wendy into the jungle gym, then continues punching her there. Wendy switches to wrestling, throwing Eric into the jungle gym, then driving his face into one of the bars at least twice, and Eric begins to bleed. The crowd is loving it, cheering them on. Wendy now delivers a long series of alternating punches, forcing Eric back across the playground and into a hobby elephant. Eric puts his arms up to deflect the punches, but it's ineffective.

"Fuck him up, Wendy!" Butters yelled.

Eric finally tosses Wendy off him and throws a punch at her, but she punches faster, making him miss. She then punches him on the right temple, and Eric wobbles a bit. As he recovers, Wendy delivers the finishing blow: a fierce right cross that turns Eric head around and sends his body flying. Eric falls to the ground, losing a tooth. Wendy kicks him a few times for good measure. She runs out of strength, staggers backwards, and drops down on her ass, exhausted. Of course Wendy won, how could it be otherwise?

I hope you enjoyed it. Yes, this is a Stick of Truth story. No, it's not going to follow the plot exactly, in fact, it's going to veer off into an entirely different direction, in terms of plot and mood. You'll see. I have played the game though and I really enjoy it. Anyways, updates aren't going to be very quick, gonna warn you ahead of time. Until next time.