Disclaimer: I don't own FF7 or Monty Pythons Lumberjack song.
-On a lone dark pedestal, a small flower girl prays. As she looks up, she sees her friend, Cloud. She gives him the finger, and just as she's doing so, she falls forward, a sword all the way through her. Sephiroth pulls it out of her-
Cloud: SEPHIROTH! WHY?!
Sephiroth: You don't know what it's like to be an evil villain! Having an alien say she's my mom ratting on me to become a god. She wanted me to kill Aeris because she was an obstacle, but I killed Aeris because she would be buisness competition.
Vincent: -raises eyebrow- Buisness competition?
Sephiroth:
I never wanted to be an evil villain in the first place!
I... I wanted to be...
A FLOWER GIRL!
All: 0_0
-Cait Sith drops from the ceiling playing a piano-
Sephiroth: -putting his hand to his heart, as a spotlight shines on him- Sprinting from street to street! As I run from the mighty cars of Shinra! With my best sword by my side!
-Marlene throws down each flower from the sets light rail as Sephiroth calls out each name-
Sephiroth: The Tulip!
The Rose!
The Daffodil!
The Dandelion!
The Large Weedy Sunflower! -the large sunflower drops on Sephiroths head. He looks at it, and looks up-
Marlene: MY BAD!
Sephiroth: -glare-We'd sing! Sing! Sing!
-the cardboard background drops, and it changes too the top of a Midgar plate. The TURKS, minus Tseng, watch-
Sephiroth: -sings- Oh, I'm a flower girl, and I'm okay,
I plant all night and I sell all day.
Barret, Yuffie, Cid, and Red: He's a flower girl, and he's okay,
He plants all night and he sells all day.
Cloud: -holding Aeris- SHOW SOME RESPECT! MY FIANCEES DEAD! STOP SINGING!
Tifa: FIANCEE? -hits Cloud with the ALL MIGHTY FRYING PAN OF OUCH!-
Sephiroth: -ignoring them, and sings- I run from TURKS, I meet hot guys,
I go to the labra-try.
On Wednesdays I go killin'
And have barmaid blood for tea.
Tifa:...Aeris wanted to kill me?
Yuffie: Who doesn't? ^_^
Reno, Elena, and Rude: -forming a kick line, singing along- Unbeknownst to them, the ghost of Aeris joins in on the kickline too-
He runs from Turks, he meets hot guys,
He goes to the labra-try.
On Wednesdays he goes killin'
And has barmaid blood for tea.
Sephiroth: I'm a flower girl, and I'm okay,
I plant all night and I sell all day.
I run from TURKs, I hit and run,
I like to kill my rivals.
Tifa: -cries-
Sephiroth: I dress men up like women,
Cloud: -mumble- that wasn't in the job description
Sephiroth: And bust up Honey Bees!
-Rinoa, from FF8 drops to the ground in a honey bee outfit-
Elena and Rude: He runs from Turks, he hits and runs,
He likes to kill his rivals.
He'll dress up men like women
And bust up....
Reno: Honey Bees??????? AERIS was the Honey Bee Massacrer?!
All: .....
Sephiroth: -hits Reno and continues singing- I'm a flower girl, and I'm okay,
I plant all night and I sell all day.
I sell flowers, I wear brown boots,
And run from the law.
I wish I'd been a wussy
Just like my dear papa.
-he shows a wanted poster of Hojo-
Turks: -dancing around Sephiroth, throwing flowers- He sells flowers, he wears brown boots
And runs from the .... law????
Elena: What's this? Wants to be a *wussy*? Oh, My!
Rude: Hojo IS kind of a wuss.
Cloud: -shaking Aeris's dead body- And I thought you were so innocent! Chooker!
Sephiroth: -pushes Cloud off the Midgar plate- I'm a flower girl, and I'm okay,
I plant all night and I sell all day.
All: He's a flower girl, and he's okaaaaaaayyy..... (BONG) -Cloud comes up with a Knights of The Round summon, killing everyone-
-Sailor Leo walks onto the set-
Sailor Leo: The opinions you have just scene do not reflect the real ambitions of real flower girls.
Sephiroth: -walks in, wearing Aeris's pink dress and red vest- Damn, outta machine guns.
Aeris's Ghost: Use the grenades Sephiroth, Use the grenades!
Sailor Leo: Well...maybe they do. Until next time! Ciao!
End
-On a lone dark pedestal, a small flower girl prays. As she looks up, she sees her friend, Cloud. She gives him the finger, and just as she's doing so, she falls forward, a sword all the way through her. Sephiroth pulls it out of her-
Cloud: SEPHIROTH! WHY?!
Sephiroth: You don't know what it's like to be an evil villain! Having an alien say she's my mom ratting on me to become a god. She wanted me to kill Aeris because she was an obstacle, but I killed Aeris because she would be buisness competition.
Vincent: -raises eyebrow- Buisness competition?
Sephiroth:
I never wanted to be an evil villain in the first place!
I... I wanted to be...
A FLOWER GIRL!
All: 0_0
-Cait Sith drops from the ceiling playing a piano-
Sephiroth: -putting his hand to his heart, as a spotlight shines on him- Sprinting from street to street! As I run from the mighty cars of Shinra! With my best sword by my side!
-Marlene throws down each flower from the sets light rail as Sephiroth calls out each name-
Sephiroth: The Tulip!
The Rose!
The Daffodil!
The Dandelion!
The Large Weedy Sunflower! -the large sunflower drops on Sephiroths head. He looks at it, and looks up-
Marlene: MY BAD!
Sephiroth: -glare-We'd sing! Sing! Sing!
-the cardboard background drops, and it changes too the top of a Midgar plate. The TURKS, minus Tseng, watch-
Sephiroth: -sings- Oh, I'm a flower girl, and I'm okay,
I plant all night and I sell all day.
Barret, Yuffie, Cid, and Red: He's a flower girl, and he's okay,
He plants all night and he sells all day.
Cloud: -holding Aeris- SHOW SOME RESPECT! MY FIANCEES DEAD! STOP SINGING!
Tifa: FIANCEE? -hits Cloud with the ALL MIGHTY FRYING PAN OF OUCH!-
Sephiroth: -ignoring them, and sings- I run from TURKS, I meet hot guys,
I go to the labra-try.
On Wednesdays I go killin'
And have barmaid blood for tea.
Tifa:...Aeris wanted to kill me?
Yuffie: Who doesn't? ^_^
Reno, Elena, and Rude: -forming a kick line, singing along- Unbeknownst to them, the ghost of Aeris joins in on the kickline too-
He runs from Turks, he meets hot guys,
He goes to the labra-try.
On Wednesdays he goes killin'
And has barmaid blood for tea.
Sephiroth: I'm a flower girl, and I'm okay,
I plant all night and I sell all day.
I run from TURKs, I hit and run,
I like to kill my rivals.
Tifa: -cries-
Sephiroth: I dress men up like women,
Cloud: -mumble- that wasn't in the job description
Sephiroth: And bust up Honey Bees!
-Rinoa, from FF8 drops to the ground in a honey bee outfit-
Elena and Rude: He runs from Turks, he hits and runs,
He likes to kill his rivals.
He'll dress up men like women
And bust up....
Reno: Honey Bees??????? AERIS was the Honey Bee Massacrer?!
All: .....
Sephiroth: -hits Reno and continues singing- I'm a flower girl, and I'm okay,
I plant all night and I sell all day.
I sell flowers, I wear brown boots,
And run from the law.
I wish I'd been a wussy
Just like my dear papa.
-he shows a wanted poster of Hojo-
Turks: -dancing around Sephiroth, throwing flowers- He sells flowers, he wears brown boots
And runs from the .... law????
Elena: What's this? Wants to be a *wussy*? Oh, My!
Rude: Hojo IS kind of a wuss.
Cloud: -shaking Aeris's dead body- And I thought you were so innocent! Chooker!
Sephiroth: -pushes Cloud off the Midgar plate- I'm a flower girl, and I'm okay,
I plant all night and I sell all day.
All: He's a flower girl, and he's okaaaaaaayyy..... (BONG) -Cloud comes up with a Knights of The Round summon, killing everyone-
-Sailor Leo walks onto the set-
Sailor Leo: The opinions you have just scene do not reflect the real ambitions of real flower girls.
Sephiroth: -walks in, wearing Aeris's pink dress and red vest- Damn, outta machine guns.
Aeris's Ghost: Use the grenades Sephiroth, Use the grenades!
Sailor Leo: Well...maybe they do. Until next time! Ciao!
End