Bear in the Dream House
(Before it appeared on here, this fic was a present for one of my sisters.)
-Chapter One-
Malibu!
If you ever wanted a place to relax and have fun in the sun, it was there. Assuming you had enough money to stay at one of the over-priced hotels, and assuming you were able to navigate through the mobs of people to get there. Summer and winter, spring and autumn, the city was flocked with both tourists and residents. Incidentally, all of them were dolls, and were well aware of the fact, but that's neither here nor there. And out of all the dolls who lived in Malibu, the most famous was Barbie.
Barbie lived, with her sisters Skipper, Stacy, and Chelsie, in a large house called the Dreamhouse. It had been built by Barbie's fanatically loyal boyfriend, Ken. It had every technological convenience one could wish for, from a kitchen that made breakfast at the touch of a button to a giant tank where dolphins happily swam. It only had one bathroom, though.
On this particular morning, Barbie woke up feeling chipper and pleasant. She always woke up like this, because not only was Barbie famous and stylish, she was genuinely nice and good-natured too. That is a combination not many people have, doll or otherwise.
Barbie yawned and hopped out of bed. Her blonde hair was a rat's nest, but all Barbie had to do was swish her head and every single hair fell into place in a stylish 'do. She looked into her mirror. Perfect. She changed out of her pajamas and into a chic T-shirt and skirt, and headed downstairs.
Chelsie, the youngest, had gotten up a little before Barbie, and was already in the kitchen when Barbie entered. "Good morning, Chelsie," said Barbie. "Ready for some breakfast?" "Yep!" replied adorable little Chelsie, with her blonde hair in pigtails.
Barbie walked over to the counter and pressed a button. A panel flipped up, revealing a big bowl of steaming hot oatmeal. "Oatmeal?" asked Barbie.
Chelsie shook her head. "No, thanks… how about pancakes?" Barbie pressed another button. The panel flipped over again, hiding the oatmeal and revealing a plate of syrupy pancakes. "Alright!" cheered Chelsie. She and Barbie dug in.
As they ate Skipper and Stacy walked in. Skipper was playing with her phone, as usual. "Have some pancakes, girls!" Barbie said. Stacy pulled up a chair and had at it. Skipper, not looking up from her phone, held up a hand. "In a minute. Just let me text Amber something."
Eventually, Skipper temporarily put away her phone and sat down to eat with the others. Barbie, who was the first one done, stood up and said "While you guys finish up breakfast, I'm going to go get ready to meet Nikki, Teresa, Midge, and Summer at the mall." As she walked toward her closet anticipating spending the day with her friends, she wondered if anything special would happen that day.
As it turned out, something special would happen that day, but Barbie could never have guessed what it was…
-Chapter Two-
Very far away from Malibu (or maybe not so far away, who knows?), there was a place called the Hundred-Acre-Wood. It was, in many ways, the polar opposite of Malibu. Instead of being mostly made up of buildings with many inhabitants, it was mostly made up of trees with few inhabitants. Instead of constantly keeping up with the latest trends, it probably hadn't changed much in decades. Instead of being inhabited by thousands of human-like dolls, it was inhabited by a handful of animal-like stuffed creatures.
One of these stuffed animals was Winnie-the-Pooh. He was a bear of very little brain and a very big appetite, particularly for honey. He had gotten out of bed early on this sunny morning, and had just walked up to his mirror. "Hello, how are you?" he asked his reflection, and answered himself with "I'm fine, thank you."
He then proceeded to do his morning exercises (bears have to keep in shape, you know). Then he rewarded himself with some breakfast, which consisted of scooping some honey out of the pot with his paws and eating it. Don't say that it's bad table manners, he'd never heard of any other way to eat it.
Just as Pooh was finishing his breakfast, he heard from outside a voice with a shrill lisp calling "Hey! Everybody! Foresht meeting! Come to the shandpit immediately! By dingy, it'sh exshtremely important!" As Pooh put away the now-empty honeypot, he said to himself "That sounds like my dear friend, Gopher. I'll have to come to the forest meeting." And he walked out of his front door and set out to do so.
While Pooh had been doing his morning agenda, one of his friends, Rabbit, had been doing his as well. He had just finished organizing all his jams, jellies, and preserves in alphabetical order on his new shelves. He stood back and admired his work. "Ah, all my various toast toppings perfectly in place whenever I need them. And in excellent time, too, if I do say so myself!"
Rabbit's self-praise was cut short, however, when the ground started to shake slightly. Rabbit was puzzled for a moment, then he realized what it was. He had just enough time to groan "Oh no," before what appeared to be an orange missile rocketed into the room. The missile was actually Tigger, another of Pooh's friends.
Tigger crashed right into Rabbit, sending them both sprawling to the floor and knocking Rabbit's shelf over. Several of the jars shattered as they fell to the ground. Tigger, who was basically a cuddly, stuffed tiger, jumped up and bounced up and down on his springy tail. "Hoo hoo hoo hoo! Goooooooood morning, Long-Ears!" he jovially exclaimed.
Rabbit got up and twisted his ears around his head in anger. "TIGGER!" he yelled, "You've ruined my perfectly organized jams, jellies, and preserves collection!"
"Aww, no problem, ol' buddy. I'll help you pick them up!"
"NO!" screeched Rabbit. "Don't touch any of them!" Tigger shrugged and backed away from the strewn-about jars. Rabbit took several deep breaths and asked "Now, Tigger, was there something you wanted?"
Tigger smiled. "Just wanted to drop by and say how-do-you-do, Long-Ears, and to tell you there's a really big meeting at the sandpit. Sounds pretty omnimportant! See you there!" Tigger waved cheerfully and bounded out the door.
Rabbit sighed and started to sweep up the mess.
At the sandpit, all the residents of the Hundred-Acre-Wood had now gathered for the forest meeting. Pooh was there, and with him was his dearest friend, timid little Piglet. Tigger was there, hopping in place impatiently. Rabbit was there, having cleaned up the mess in his kitchen and taken some headache medicine. Eeyore was there as well, gloomy as always and wondering aloud which disaster the meeting was about. Kanga was standing nearby with her son Roo tucked in her pouch. Lumpy, the bright pink heffalump, was talking to them. Owl was perched on a tree branch overhead, telling a story about his grandfather that nobody was really listening to. And lastly, there was Gopher, who had called the meeting.
Gopher, once he'd seen that everyone was there, walked out to the center of the sandpit and cleared his throat. "Hey! Lishen up!" Everybody stopped talking and looked at him.
Gopher continued "Here'sh what thish ish all about: earlier today I wash digging a new hole, like alwaysh. Shuddenly, I shaw a green light at the bottom. Needlesh to shay, I got out of there lickety-shplit! The hole ish over here."
Gopher led them a few yards away toward a hole in the ground. Just like he said, when everybody looked in, they could see a green light a few feet below. "It'sh gotten bigger and brighter shince I left," Gopher said.
"Hmmm," wondered Pooh, "Think, think, think. What could it be? Be. A be? A "B"? A bee? Could it be a bee? Could "B" be a bee?" But since he knew he was a bear of very little brain, he looked up and asked "What do you think, Owl?"
Owl flew down from the new tree he had perched on and hopped over to look down the hole. He tilted his head, squinted one eye, rubbed his chin, and said "Hmmm," and "My, my, how peculiar," a lot. Finally, he looked at the others and said "After much examination, deliberation, and speculation, I have concluded that it is… a green light."
Rabbit rolled his eyes and groaned.
Piglet nervously peered down the hole, then darted back to Pooh's side. "Oh, d-dear. D-do you think it's dangerous?" "Most likely," responded Eeyore.
"Now, calm down, everybody," said Kanga. "I'm sure that there's a perfectly logical explanation. Roo, come back here!" Kanga grabbed Roo, who had hopped out of her pouch and started toward the hole.
"But, Mama, I wanna see what it is!"
Kanga shook her head. "I don't want you falling down the hole. I think we should stay away from it until we can figure out what it is."
"But, Kanga," put in Pooh, "how will we figure out what it is if we don't get close?" Everyone looked surprised, especially Rabbit. Pooh had actually made a good point!
"I know! We should drop a rock down it and see if it bounces! Hoo hoo hoo!" Tigger exclaimed. Rabbit's jaw dropped. First Pooh, then Tigger! He quickly got himself together and said "Er- very good suggestion, Tigger. Let's give it a shot and see what happens!"
Rabbit went off and found a large rock, then gave it to Owl, who flew a few feet above the hole. He bellowed "Ready, steady, and all that? Right then. Here we go!"
Owl let go of the stone, and it plummeted into the hole. Everyone braced themselves. At first, nothing happened. Then they heard a whooshing, sucking sound. They felt a large gust of wind tug at them, and it gradually got stronger and stronger. Soon, most of the friends were getting pulled in toward the pit.
Owl was flying in the opposite direction with all his might, and it was just barely keeping from getting sucked in. Lumpy had managed to wrap his trunk around a tree as a lifeline. Kanga did the same with her tail, and managed to hold onto Roo with her paw. The others, however, weren't so lucky. Eventually, Pooh, Piglet, Tigger, Rabbit, Eeyore and Gopher were sucked down the hole. The great, whooshing wind died down immediately after, and in a minute all was still.
Lumpy, Owl, Kanga and Roo tentatively went over to the hole and looked down. The green light had disappeared, and all they could see was darkness. There was no sign of their friends. They looked at each other. Finally, Owl said "Under the circumstances, I believe the best course of action would be to… get help." The others nodded, and they all ran off.
-Chapter Three-
In Malibu, Barbie was all ready for her trip to the mall. She had said goodbye to her sisters and walked out the door. As she strolled down the sidewalk, people looked and waved at her. A few took pictures. Barbie didn't mind, she was used to it.
As she walked down the sidewalk, she heard a voice behind her. "Hey, Barbie! Wait up!"
Barbie turned and smiled as she saw Ken, sprinting to catch up with her. He was sweet, even if his inventions did sometimes go awry. Ken jogged up beside Barbie, huffing and puffing. "Pant, pant- So, Barbie, did you try out that new Super-Paint-Erator™ that I made you?"
"Yes, I did. It painted a whole room… the wrong color."
Ken's face fell. "Oh… sorry, Barbie." Barbie patted him on the shoulder. "It's okay, Ken. All it needs is a few adjustments. You'll get it right next time, I'm sure."
Ken smiled. "Thanks, Barb- oof!"
Ken had just been elbowed to the ground by a guy about the same age with dark, wavy hair and a guitar. "Helloooo, Barbie. Sorry about that, Kenny-Boy. Didn't see you there."
Ken picked himself up off the ground, muttering under his breath. Barbie smiled tolerantly at the newcomer, who was named Ryan. Ryan was always trying to persuade Barbie to get rid of Ken and date him instead. His sister, Raquelle, was trying to do the same thing with Ken about Barbie. But so far, neither of them were succeeding.
Ryan held up his guitar and said "So, Barbie, are you ready to hear that ten-act rock opera I wrote about you?" Barbie said "Well… um… now might not be the best-"
Ryan, not listening, started to strum his guitar and sing "Ohhhhhh-" before he lost his balance and fell flat on his back. Everyone on the street clapped and cheered. Ryan was not a good singer.
Ryan got up and said "Ah, well, I'll sing it to you later when there aren't as many PHILISTINES around!" He yelled the last part to make sure everyone on the street heard it. Then, with a "Later, Barbie," he strutted away.
Ken shook his head and continued to walk and chat with Barbie. It seemed that, finally, they were going to be able to talk without interruptions.
That was when all the animals came flying out of the manhole.
Pooh, Piglet, Tigger, Rabbit, Eeyore, and Gopher zipped out of the manhole in the street and into the air. They hung there for an instant, suspended in midair, before plummeting back to earth on the street. Ken and Barbie watched, openmouthed.
The animals lay there for a minute, too bruised and confused to say or do anything- except for Piglet, who was still screaming. But even he stopped after a second.
Rabbit achingly got up and asked "Ouch… where are we?" The other animals got up too, and looked around. Barbie said "Um… you're in Malibu." Ken didn't say anything. Ken had fainted. Not even Piglet had done that.
"Wowee!" exclaimed Tigger, looking around and hopping excitedly. "Look at all the gigantuan houses!" The other animals marveled at their surroundings. "Hot diggity!" whistled Gopher. "It's… it's incredible!" gasped Rabbit. "It's HUGE!" exclaimed Piglet. "It's too nice to be real," speculated Eeyore.
Pooh, like everyone else, was overwhelmed by all the huge buildings and bright colors. But he was still aware of his need for the bare necessities- namely, honey. He hadn't eaten since breakfast, and that had been a long time ago in bear-time. His tummy was grumbling in a decidedly angry way.
Rabbit cleared his throat. "Ahem! Now, everybody, listen to me. We have evidently been transported to a strange, alien environment. Under the circumstances, I think it would be best to assemble… A PLAN." He looked around, and at Barbie and Ken. Ken was just getting up dizzily from when he had fainted, and was mumbling something about birds and stars.
Rabbit approached Barbie and Ken, trying to project an air of confidence and leadership for these mysterious, bipedal creatures. "Greetings, Citizens of Malibu… or, um, whatever it was," he said, loudly and slowly. "We come from the far-away realm of the Hundred-Acre-Wood. We come in peace. We hope that you mean us no harm."
Barbie, following suit, answered the same way. "Greetings, visitors from the Hundred-Acre-Wood. We are glad you come in peace. We mean you no harm." Rabbit sighed in relief. "Phew, that's good. I mean- I'm Rabbit. These are my companions." He gestured to each one. "Pooh, Piglet, Eeyore, Tigger, and Gopher."
"Nice to meet you all," said Barbie. "I'm Barbie, and this is Ken." Ken nodded, still slightly dizzy. "Hi, Mr. Bunny." "That's Rabbit," Rabbit huffed.
Tigger shouted "Well, I don't know about you all, but now that the introducings are outta' the way, I'm gonna do some exploratin'! Hoo hoo hoo hoo!" And with that, he bounded away down the street.
"Tigger! Come back!" called Rabbit, but Tigger was so far away that he couldn't hear him. While Rabbit was yelling after him, Pooh said to Piglet "My tummy's rumbling, Piglet. Let's find some honey while Rabbit talks to those people who look like Christopher Robin. You best stick close to me, so as not to get lost." "Alright, Pooh. But, w-what if we all need to stay together?" asked Piglet, nervously glancing at the surroundings.
"We won't go far, little Piglet. I know! We can find some jelly beans and leave a trail, like we did before." Piglet thought that over. "You won't eat them again, will you, Pooh?" Pooh shook his head. "I will keep my tummy firmly in control until we find something else to eat." So Pooh and Piglet walked off to find some jelly beans, so they could then leave a trail and find something else to eat.
Rabbit had just given up on calling Tigger back, and turned around to find Pooh and Piglet gone too. He groaned and rubbed his forehead. "Oh, now everybody will go off somewhere else. Why me?" Barbie said to him "Malibu is a pretty safe place. Why don't you come inside and tell us about where you came from, and we'll get your friends later?" Rabbit shrugged. "Well, alright then."
Rabbit followed Barbie and Ken down the sidewalk and into the Dreamhouse. Eeyore looked up at it. "It's probably some sort of trap… but it's a nice-looking one." He followed Rabbit inside.
Gopher, now alone, looked down the manhole that they'd come from. It was all black, now. He jumped down into it, and found himself in a sewer. Still, it was a nice sewer. A bit damp, but sturdy-looking. He might like it here.
-Chapter Four-
Pooh and Piglet walked down the crowded Malibu street. Occasionally they would receive odd looks from passers-by, but most of the people didn't notice them. They were too busy with their own lives to observe a short bear in a red shirt and a small pig.
Piglet had found a discarded bag of peanuts along the side of the road, and were using those to leave a trail behind them instead of jelly beans. He had to keep an eye on Pooh, though. As they walked, Pooh observed "Isn't it curious, Piglet, that those peanuts were just sitting along the side of this concrete path, just waiting for us?" Piglet nodded. "Yes it is, Pooh. In fact, I saw several other bags and cartons, too. I wonder if they leave them there for someone to come and collect?"
As they walked, Pooh sniffed the air. "Hmm, I don't happen to smell any honey, but there does seem to be a variety of, yummm, goodies around here, unless my nose is lying to me, which doesn't tend to happen, and would be very upsetting if it did." Piglet looked around, then pointed toward a building. "That place smells good, Pooh."
Pooh looked at the building. In front of it was a billboard shaped like a giant hamburger that said
BIG BOB'S MALIBU BURGERS
2,040 Dolls Served!
Pooh sniffed and nodded. "How very observant, Piglet. Let's go in." They walked in through a big door with a handle shaped like a spatula.
Inside, people were sitting at booths and eating delicious-smelling burgers and fries. Pooh's tummy rumbled even louder. He and Piglet walked up to the counter, where there was a bored-looking teenage doll listening to headphones. Pooh tapped on the counter with his paw. The teen looked down at them with a bored expression. He didn't seem surprised that there was bear and a pig in the restaurant.
"Hello," said Pooh. "Could you spare a smmmmall smmmmmackerel of food?"
The teen rolled his eyes and pointed toward a window. "Didn't you read the sign? No shirt, no shoes, no service. And you-" he looked at Pooh's and Piglet's feet "-don't appear to be wearing any shoes, and one of you has no shirt. Hence, no service."
"Oh, bother," said Pooh. He scratched his head. "I'm a bit confused by all these new things. Maybe we should ask that Barbie person-"
"WHOA!" The boy straightened up. "Are you two Barbie's friends?" Pooh looked even more confused. "Well… I suppose…"
"Wow, sorry, dudes! I TOTALLY didn't know! Here, take some food! Take it for free! Take ALL of it for free!" The boy got up on top of the counter and cupped his hands around his mouth. "HEY! EVERYONE! These little dudes are Barbie's friends! Give 'em all your food!"
The customers happily complied, and soon Pooh and Piglet had more food than they could carry. As they walked out the door, holding onto as much as they could, the boy called after them "Hey, come back anytime, dudes! Any friend of Barbie's is a friend of ours!"
"Thank you very much!" called Pooh as they exited. They saw a bench, and sat down to eat the enormous amount of burgers and fries. As they ate, Pooh remarked to Piglet "You know, (munch), I rather like this place. And the food."
Meanwhile, at the other end of Malibu, Ryan was in his house making improvements. He was adding a new wing to The Ryan Museum. So far, the museum consisted of cardboard cutouts of Ryan, locks of Ryan's hair, cardboard cutouts of Ryan, a zip locked bag containing a taco Ryan had been too full to finish, posters of Ryan, and cardboard cutouts of Ryan. Ryan figured that someday, when he'd become a world-famous musician and married Barbie, he could move into the Dreamhouse and charge admission for people to see the museum in his old house.
He was currently setting up five busts of himself, each with a different, but equally gorgeous, expression of its face. Ryan had just finished, and stepped back to admire them. "Now, THAT is a room full of handsome," he said to himself.
His self-praise was cut short, however, when the ground started to shake slightly. Ryan looked around, puzzled.
All of a sudden, what looked like an orange missile shot into his house. It landed with a big CRASH, knocking all the busts off the pedestals and causing them to smash on the floor. The orange missile, just like before, was Tigger. "Hoo hoo hoo hoo! Hellooooo!"
"AAAAHHHHHHH!" screamed Ryan. He ran out the door. Tigger bounced after him, yelling "Hey! Where're ya goin', pal?"
Ryan ran like heck. Behind him, he could hear the horrible creature, now singing a horrible song:
The wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is Tiggers are wonderful things
Their tops are made out of rubber
Their bottoms are made out of springs
They're bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy
Fun fun fun fun fun
The most wonderful thing about Tiggers is that
I-I-I-I-M the only one!
I'm the only one!
Ryan ducked down a side street, desperate to avoid the hideous, jumping animal. As he ran, he looked behind him. He didn't see the animal anymore. He must have lost it!
"HA!" he yelled. "STUPID MONSTROSITY! Guess that'll teach you to mess with- OOF!"
Ryan ran into a telephone pole while his head was turned. He collapsed onto the sidewalk, out cold.
-Chapter Five-
At the Dreamhouse, Rabbit and Eeyore were getting comfortable. Skipper, Stacy and Chelsie were more than a little surprised that these talking animals had dropped in out of the blue, but Rabbit was in the process of explaining their story. "They're ADORBS!" Chelsie had squealed. Rabbit had sniffed in indignation.
Barbie, Ken, Skipper, Stacy and Chelsie all listened attentively to Rabbit's story. When he was finished, Barbie said "Wow, what a story. What do you think it all means, Ken?"
Ken scratched his chin. "Well, I think… now, don't hold me to this, but I think that… they were whisked out of their home… and pulled into… wait… for… it… OURS!"
Rabbit rolled his eyes. "Back home, I know someone who would get along just fine with you."
Barbie patiently asked Ken "Do you have any ideas on why that happened? Or how we can get them back?" Ken continued to scratch his chin. "I suppose I could use the closet's environmental abnormalities detecting feature, but I'm gonna need someone who's good at making plans and charts."
"I am!" Rabbit and Stacy both said at once. Then they looked at each other. "I suppose we could both do it," said Rabbit.
"Great!" Ken said. "Follow me to the closet, guys. And don't worry, I'll get to the bottom of this. You're in good hands!" He walked through a door.
"Um… Ken?" asked Barbie. Ken poked his head back through the door. "Yeah, Barbie?" he answered. "The closet's that way," Barbie said, pointing to a door on the opposite side of the room.
"Oh. Right." Ken said sheepishly, leading Rabbit and Stacy through the other door.
Two hours, thirty-five minutes and thirteen seconds later (but who was counting?), Rabbit and Stacy emerged, breathless from charting like they'd never charted before. Ken clumsily wobbled after them, dizzy from having his mind blown by the sheer number of diagrams.
"Wow, you three must have been real busy bees in there!" Barbie commented. Stacy gasped "We think we've (pant, pant)-" "-found (pant, pant) a solution," Rabbit finished for her.
Ken shook off the dizziness and said "By calculating the flashiness factor of Malibu, and then comparing it to the sheer amount of fashion contained in your closet, we've concluded that some mysterious clash of those two forces created some sort of hole in the time-space vortex. And hopefully, with the right tools, we can re-create it, and be able to get our forest friends back home!"
"Well, that's great!" said Barbie. "We should go round 'em up now." Rabbit nodded. "Quite right. We need to find Pooh, Piglet, Tigger, and Gopher on the double!"
While this was going on, Eeyore had gone off to find either something to eat or something depressing. Eventually, he wandered into the kitchen, where Skipper had gone to use her phone in privacy away from the strange guests. She barely glanced up at him. "Hey," she said, still concentrating on her phone.
"Afternoon," said Eeyore.
"Don't wanna stay with the others?"
"Nope."
"Neither do I."
Eeyore glanced at some snacks on the table, arranged around a vase of roses as a centerpiece. "May I?"
"Sure. Help yourself."
"Thanks," said Eeyore, who put his head up on the table and started to chew forlornly on the rose thorns.
After he'd finished nibbling on the roses, he plodded out into the hallway. There he ran into Tawny. Tawny was Barbie's pet horse, and a particularly refined, noble breed at that. She was so sophisticated that she was allowed to freely roam around the Dreamhouse. When she looked down and saw the scruffy, mangy-looking quadruped staring mournfully up at her, she just barely managed to not reflexively jump away. Eeyore, for his part, had to squint and look away for a moment because of Tawny's bright coat.
Tawny recovered herself and gave Eeyore a thorough looking-over. "Oh my," she said. "You poor thing! You'll be needing my help immediately!"
For the first time in his life, Eeyore was not only surprised, but flabbergasted! "Uh… help?" Tawny nodded vigorously. "Oh my, yes! Look in the mirror! The state of your mane is dreadful! And your tale! It's as if it's just barely clinging to your body; if I didn't know better I'd think it could fall off! Come with me, we'll see if we can get you looking more like a four-legged finery!"
Luckily for Eeyore, Rabbit bounded up toward them just then. "There you are, Eeyore! Come on! We think we've found a way to get back home!" Eeyore, greatly relieved, followed Rabbit out of the Dreamhouse and out onto the street, where Gopher and Barbie's crew were waiting.
Rabbit said "Let's see, we have me, Eeyore, and Gopher. We need to find Pooh, Piglet, and Tigger! Where are they?" he asked, looking around. "Look!" said Gopher, pointing. "A trail of peanutsh." "Piglet must've left them!" exclaimed Rabbit. "Follow those peanuts!"
Pooh and Piglet, unaware that the way home was so near, had polished off all the food they'd gotten from the restaurant. Then, still on the search for adventure, they had gone to explore the biggest building they could see, which happened to be the Malibu Mall. They had been marveling at the displays and decorations, until they were stopped by a stern-looking man riding a Segway. Wearing a uniform and sunglasses, he glared down at them.
"Ahem," he said. "You two are in violation of several Malibu Mall Codes, including (but not limited to): Failure to cover your face with oversized sunglasses, failure to wear designer jeans, failure to wear any jeans at all, failure to give in to our outrageous bargains, wearing a shirt without a brand-name on it (for shame!), and wearing pink out-of-season." He took out piece of paper. "I'm afraid you'll have to sign this ticket."
Pooh and Piglet weren't quite sure what to do, but fortunately Barbie, Rabbit, and the others came along just then. "There you two are!" exclaimed Rabbit. Barbie said "Is there something wrong, Officer?" The mall cop turned to her. "There's the matter of this ticket, ma'am, which needs to be signed by someone." "Here," Barbie said, "I'll sign it."
The mall cop shrugged and handed her the ticket. She signed it and handed it back to him. "Now you tow come back with us!" she told Pooh and Piglet. As they all walked away, the mall cop smiled. "Sweet, now I can add it to my collection of Barbie autographs."
Rabbit explained the theorized way of getting home to Pooh and Piglet as they made their way back. Knowing he was a bear of very little brain, Pooh didn't pretend to understand, and just scratched his head and pondered. When they got back to the Dreamhouse, Rabbit did a head count. "It looks like everyone is here but Tigger. So we just- OOF!"
Rabbit had been flattened by a certain striped, spring-tailed cat. "Somebody mention me?" chuckled Tigger. He hopped off of Rabbit, who got up indignantly and said "Tigger, where have you- never mind, we're all here, let's just get going."
Ken said "Now, everyone gather round the manhole. Malibu residents on this side, Talking Animals on this side. Barbie, you stand here, in the middle of this side." Everyone complied. Ken continued "Now, on the count of three, everyone from Malibu strike a flashy pose! One, two, three!"
Everyone from Malibu struck a pose, and the animals from the Hundred-Acre-Wood held hands and braced themselves. Suddenly, the ground started to rumble. Then the rumble got stronger and everything started to quake violently. The wind howled in time with it.
"What's happening?" shouted Rabbit. "Aunty Em! Aunty Em! It'sh a twishter!" screamed Gopher.
"No!" yelled Ken. "The attractiveness aspect on THIS side of the sewer must be too strong, it upset the balance! To stabilize it, we'll need something really UNattractive!" "Wh-where will we find one?" Piglet distraughtly cried.
At this moment, who should come walking down the street then Ryan's sister, Raquelle. As she walked, was too busy making sure that her lipstick was exactly even on all sides to notice little things like, oh, say, the ground shaking and the incredible wind.
When she finally did notice, she looked up and saw Barbie, Ken, and the others being buffeted about by the wind. Convincing herself that they were somehow responsible for the noise, she scowled "Ugh, Barbie, would you stop rumbling the ground? I have an interview with Black Hair Monthly and I don't-"
Raquelle stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the creatures from the Hundred-Acre-Wood, struggling to keep themselves balanced on the quaking ground. She then screamed "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! Filthy woodland abominations!" Following this, she threw herself face-down on the ground and waved her arms, apparently thinking that this was some sort of defense maneuver.
However, it seemed that this was enough unattractiveness to counteract the thingamajig-whatever, because the ground stopped shaking, and the wind started to drain down into the manhole. The green light was shining out of it now, brighter than before. "I think this is it!" cried Rabbit. "Malibu residents, grab onto something! We're going home!"
Barbie, Ken, and Barbie's sisters grabbed onto the streetlights. "GOODBYEEEEEE!" yelled Pooh, Rabbit, and the others as they were swept down into the manhole.
-Chapter Six-
After a bit, the wind died down, and the green light disappeared. Barbie and the others let go of the streetlights and went to look down the manhole. They couldn't see anything but the dark sewer.
"Well, today was… weird," said Skipper. "Do you think they got home safe?" asked Stacy. "I'm sure they did," replied Barbie "Right, Ken?"
Ken nodded, looking disappointed. "Oh yeah, they will. It's just…" "Just what, Ken?" Barbie asked.
"It's just… I was sorta hoping that they'd stay a little longer, give us a new perspective on our lives, and maybe we could give them a new perspective on their lives, and possibly develop some characterizations, and then they could leave after we'd all taught each other a valuable lesson."
No one was quite sure how to respond to this. Barbie just put a comforting hand on Ken's shoulder. Then they all walked back into the Dreamhouse together.
"YAAAAHHHHHHHOOOOWWWW- OOF!"
Pooh, Piglet, Rabbit, Tigger, Eeyore, and Gopher all flew out of the hole in the ground. After crashing onto the earth, they all groaned in pain. Rabbit said "Well, at least this time it's grass and soil, and not hard pavement… Hey! It's grass and soil! It worked! We're home!"
They all jumped up with cries of relief. "Home shweet home!" cried Gopher. "Oh, the soft, bouncy earth!" sighed Tigger, who then started to passionately kiss the ground.
Suddenly, they heard Owl's voice: "Over here! In this clearing!" the all turned to see Owl flying into view, followed by Kanga, Roo, Lumpy, and Pooh's human friend, Christopher Robin.
Everyone stopped when they saw the others. "They're back!" cried Roo. Owl, for once, seemed to be speechless.
Christopher Robin smiled. "Well, wherever, they went, they seem to be back now. Hello, Pooh, Piglet, Rabbit, Tigger, Eeyore, Gopher. The others were very concerned when you disappeared this morning."
Owl suddenly regained his voice. "But… but when did you get back? Where did you go? How did you get back?" Rabbit answered "We arrived just now, it's a long story, and… I don't really understand how we got back at all. The explanation was really rather vague."
"Well, the important thing is that you all got back safe and sound," said Kanga. The others nodded. Poo raised his paw. "Um, pardon me, but I would like to suggest that we tell the whole story at my house, preferably over some, hmmmm, honey."
"I'm for that! Hoo hoo hoo hoo!" declared Tigger. Everyone else started to walk toward Pooh's house, with Owl muttering "All this excitement is too much for me. I need some tonic."
As the others walked off, Christopher Robin knelt down to face Pooh. "Wherever you went, did you have an exciting day?"
Pooh shrugged. "Why, yes, I suppose I did. The food was certainly adventurous."
Christopher Robin chuckled and patted Pooh on the head. "Silly old bear."