"Okay, so…" Cristina stammered, trying quickly to comprehend the words that had just come out of Owen's mouth. A divorce? No. This wasn't how this conversation was supposed to go.
"So I'll contact a lawyer, and I'll get back to you with dates. I think it's best if we get it over with as soon as possible."
Cristina couldn't think of anything to say, so she nodded, eyes watering slightly. Not wanting Owen to see how this was affecting her though, she blinked the tears away. Owen caught sight of the wetness around her eyes before Cristina could hide it. A pain shot across his heart at the sight of his upset wife. He knew this would be hard, he knew it wasn't fair that she couldn't know that truth behind why he was doing it, but the final product would be the justice Cristina, and the other plane crash victims, deserved. It was his fault the hospital had changed to crappy flight services, so he wouldn't allow for nothing to happen.
"I should go," Owen said after a few minutes silence. Cristina nodded again, so seeing nothing else was going to be said, Owen turned to walk down the stairs.
Cristina finally found something to say. "Why?"
Owen stopped abruptly, and turned back around to face her. "Wha –"
"Can't we just, I don't know, figure something out? I, I… why? Why to everything? Why did we work, then suddenly, we didn't? Why did we get here? Why do you want a divorce?" Cristina asked, talking rapidly.
Owen was taken back at the power behind her voice. She seemed desperate, confused, worried, for their relationship. She had been the one to walk away; Cristina had pushed him away when he had tried, very hard, to find a way to fix everything. But she had come back, and no matter how much he kept telling himself differently, he wanted desperately to be back with her, to have things the way they used to be.
Was this a change in heart?
Owen thought through a reasonable excuse. The damn paper he had signed forbid him from telling her anything. I'll never sign another paper, Owen thought, it never does anything good. "We've tried hiding everything below the rug, we've tried therapy, and we've tried revealing everything we feel. We've tried things, Cristina. I don't know what you see, but it's clear we… we weren't meant to be." Owen saw the pain spread across Cristina's face. The words had been hard for him to say, but he had to get Cristina to say yes to the divorce. "I want a divorce because we don't work. We're kidding ourselves if we think differently."
This time Cristina couldn't keep control. The tears came rolling silently down her face, splashing onto the floor beneath her.
"So you're just… just giving up?" Cristina asked, talking through her tears. "Cause I'm not. I… I love you. I really love you, and I don't want this to end. I was stupid, I left, because at the time nothing made sense. I would blame it on the crash, but I can't. It was my own stupid self, and I… you don't know how much I regret it."
Owen was shocked. From the tears, to the emotional speech, Owen didn't know what to say.
"I'm here. I'm here, and I want to fight. I know it's late, probably too late for anything now. But… I guess I just… you can go now. You know the truth, and it sucks, really sucks, that nothing will change your mind. You don't change your mind. But, I love you." Cristina turned away, and sat down on the unused bed, her head in her hands. Crying silently, Cristina let the grief from the end of her marriage wash over her as she waited for the sound of footsteps descending down the stairs.
"I don't want a divorce."
Cristina looked up.
"What?"
"I don't want a divorce." Owen repeated, walking slowly over to Cristina. "I can't. I can't do it."
Anger welled up in Cristina. "What the hell do you mean?" Owen sat down beside Cristina. She moved away from him, as far as the bed allowed. "You can't do it?"
Owen sighed, then began telling her of what he discovered in the meetings with the hospital lawyers. When he finished, he looked over shyly at Cristina, waiting for her response. Her reaction was exactly what he expected.
"Are you kidding me? Are you freaking kidding me? The first thing you say to me is that you want a divorce. The first thing that comes out of your mouth is that you want to end this life we started, this marriage. And you seemed willing. You said we freaking aren't meant to be. Do you know what that does to someone? That doesn't exactly boost their self-esteem. And I confessed my love for you, my blinding love that makes me reveal things I don't want to say. And suddenly, you can't divorce me? Why didn't you start off with the lawsuit? That would've been a hell of a lot easier."
"I'm not allowed to tell you."
Cristina gaped. "You idiot!" She stood up, anger well known upon her face. "You idiot!" Owen stood up too, facing Cristina. Cristina stepped forward, and pushed Owen on the chest before falling down to the ground. "You… idiot!"
The tears started again. Owen knelt down and hesitantly lifted Cristina onto his lap. To his relief, Cristina didn't push away, but turned her face into his chest, and cried.
"I had to, Cristina. It's my fault you were on that plane; it's my fault all this mess happened. You deserve the chance to get back something from it, and I can't take that away as well."
"I don't want a divorce."
"I don't either. I'll figure something out. I just… I thought this was best, easiest."
Cristina laughed suddenly. "Yeah, definitely the best. Best let the wife suffer for a few minutes before telling her the truth. I like the way you think."
Owen smiled slightly, not sure exactly what to say. "I'm sorry."
"We'll figure something out."
Cristina laid her head back down on Owen's chest, and closed her eyes. Kissing the top of her head, Owen wrapped his arms around her small body and held her tight. Cristina fell asleep fast, everything from the last hour finally catching up with her. Owen however, stayed awake a while, thinking through everything. Cristina was in, Cristina wanted to fight. He had her back. He had his Cristina back, and nothing could make him happier then knowing this.