In the beginning I was alone, I had a mother and a father but they no longer cared for me. I was an outcast and unwanted because I was crazy. I thought my parents loved me, I remember when I was young and they used to look at me with proud eyes and tell me how beautiful I was, they used to adore me. And then I started having dreams or visions, and I thought that because my parents loved me they would understand, I thought maybe they could help me understand, but they stared at me with fear in their eyes, and before I knew it I was locked away…
The days were long and everyone like a nightmare repeating itself, I grew tired ok waking up, I wanted to sleep all the time and not have to face anyone. I was surrounded by people who didn't care, who just wanted to use me like an experiment, they had cold eyes and hard hearts. There was no one else there like me, some weren't a loud out of their rooms at all, I shouldn't really call them rooms… they were more like cells, tiny little shoe boxes with white walls that seemed to have a cold grey tint to them, there were tiny windows right up high where you couldn't see out, and hardly any light ever came in anyway. The people that were a loud out of their rooms sat around staring at nothing, some of them hardly talked and just sat there like they were unable to move, unable to fight back.
They didn't like me, the staff… I knew they were afraid, afraid because when I first came I tried to make them see I wasn't crazy, I tried to tell them the visions were real… but the truth scared them and it resulted in no one wanted to come near me, they would yell and yell at me to stop when I had a vision, I couldn't control them, just like I couldn't control what I saw… and in the end I would be looked in my room, only let out to see the doctor, who would poke and prod me, shine lights in my eyes, he wanted to see inside my head, they would strap me to the table and then I wouldn't remember what happened after that, I'd wake in my room feeling horrible and afraid.
My visions started out to be about my family, I knew when things were going to happen, I knew when my cousin had passed away before everyone else, but no one listened to me… even when I got locked away for some reason I kept seeing my family, I saw my mother crying and my father telling her to forget me for I was dead to them now.
And they moved on, they got rid of my things. I wanted to have hope that my parents might still love me and decide to get me out of this hell, but my visions made sure I knew better.
The days blurred into each other and I lost track of how long I was there, then one night there was a commotion, someone had set something on fire, all the staff went to help out and calm people down, and I'd had enough, I knew no one was going to help me so I had to get out… I ran as fast as I could to the front doors, and bolted, I had no idea where we were or even where to go, I just knew that I had to get away from there… I couldn't go back home so It didn't matter when I went, I hoped and prayed that my visions would lead me in the right direction.