Alright~! This is the beginning of my rewrite of Memories. I hope you like it. Writing from Ivan's POV was so much easier than Alfred's, but maybe that's because I already knew how it would end. Anyway, enjoii!

Alfred,

I write this letter to you, knowing that you will not read it. I wish I could give it to you, but I am too scared to let you see my feelings.

The day we met, Alfred, was a day I will never forget. You shined as brightly as the sun I loved so much.

Your birthday, Alfred, on that day, you looked so happy, so content. It made my heart pound, the way you asked me to hold your hand. I'd never been more happy.

Alfred, I can remember the feeling of nervousness I felt on the day of the engagement party, the way my stomach clenched, and I could only laugh to hide how scared I was. I am happy that I told you something that made you smile, though. And the blush that crept up on your cheeks...it was cute.

But, I do not understand, Alfred, how you still like me after that day, the day you saw me break. It is a side of me I wished to hide from you. I did not want you to see my weakness. Yet, you seemed to become closer to me after that day. I do not understand, but I will not complain. I am thankful.

I would die if I never got to see your sunshine again. Alfred, you are the reason I bother to wake up every day. Alfred...

I want you to see how happy you have made me. I wish I could hold your hand, for no other reason than to hold it. I want to do so many things with you...to you, Alfred, but I know nothing will ever happen if I don't take a step forward and admit my feelings to you.

If I move aside my doubts, Alfred, I sense that you want the same as me. I see the way you look at me sometimes, when you think I'm not paying attention. I see the way your eyes shine most brightly when they're looking into mine, the slight blush that appears on your cheeks when I brush up against you, and the deep blush that appears when I deliberately touch you. I wonder if you can see the way I feel, Alfred. I think that you would have said something if you could, да?

Alfred, I wish I was younger. I am too old for you, and it's frustrating, because, Alfred, I want...I want to be with you, more than I've wanted anything before.

But if there is one thing I do not want, it is to see you cry again. I could not handle seeing you cry because of me ever again. I still feel pain in my chest, right over my heart, whenever I remember the look in your eyes when you cried. I will do my best to make you happy. Even if it means keeping my feelings inside, I will make you happy. I don't want to risk losing you because of my selfishness.

But, Alfred, there are moments when I feel like I can't hold my feelings for you in any longer. When you laugh at my stupid jokes, when you smile at me for no reason, when we're alone and our eyes meet, when your hand brushes against mine...there are so many things you do that make it so difficult to keep quiet.

As odd as it feels to admit, Alfred, I want you. I cannot explain it, but sometimes, Alfred, you look so beautiful, like when you blush, your lips turn deeper red as well, and they look so...I cannot find the words to describe. I want you so badly, Alfred, sometimes I don't know how to handle it.

But do not misunderstand, Alfred. I truly love you. I've loved you since the day we met. I love you, so much. I want you to love me back. I want to hug you, kiss you, hold your hand, sleep with you; I want to be able to do whatever I want to do to you, without restraint. I don't know how much longer I can hold back the need to be near you.

Alfred, моя любовь, I love you more than the sun. I would live in pure darkness as long as I lived with you. You are my sunshine. If I am with you, I need nothing else.

Я люблю тебя.

– Ivan Braginsky

Let's get translation out of the way:
Переписывать - Perepisyvatʹ - Rewrite
Да - Da - Yes
Моя любовь - Moya lyubovʹ - My love
Я люблю тебя - Ya lyublyu tebya - I love you

So that's that! See you next chapter~!