Author Notes: Hey everyone. This is my first songfic. The song is "Iris" by the Goo Goo Dolls. I hope you all enjoy it. Reviews are welcomed . This is written about their pasts, it isn't exactly the same as what happened in the shows and the manga it's sort of redone by me.

Disclaimer: I do not own Saiyuki or any of the characters used in this songfic. I do not own Iris that is owned by the Goo Goo Dolls.

(Action, song, "talk")

And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

Hakkai made his way through the building, killing all that stood in his way. He didn't care who it was that was in his way, as long as they died. For some reason he could care less, all that mattered was finding Kanan. Finally he pushed through a couple doors, finding a room that held many cells. Suddenly a pair of hands wrapped around a set of bars. He could see her figure kneeling inside of one of the cells. He quickly moved towards her.

"Kanan."

"Gono."

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'Cause sooner or later its over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

"Let's go home, Kanan."

Hakkai was looking around the bars trying to find somewhere he could open the door to let Kanan out. All he wanted to do was get her out of there and go home. Go home together.

"I can't go with you, Gono."

Hakkai's attention went back to his love who stood on the other side of the bars. Couldn't go home with him? Why not. Confusion slowly came over him. After all he had come all this way just to get her, but soon his question was answered.

"I'm carrying his child. The spawn on his child rests inside me."

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

Her hand reached through the bars as she spoke, taking the tanto out from its sheath at his side. She stood up, holding the knife in her hand, backing away from him.

"Kanan..."

He tried to reach through the bars. What was she doing? Tears were streaming from her eyes, as she gave him a slight smile.

"Good-bye Gono."

She suddenly used the knife on herself. A bit of blood from the contact of blade to skin splashed onto his face, his eyes widening as she died right in front of his eyes.

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
And you bleed just to know you're alive

Gojyo was sitting on the floor, a younger Gojyo. Standing in front of him was a female youkai. She had just got done swinging her claws, catching Gojyo in the face, creating two small lines that began to trickle with blood. His eyes closed slightly.

'If I die she won't cry anymore...' He thought to himself.

Gojyo braced himself waiting for an attack from the woman. If her happiness meant giving up his life he was willing to do it all for her, just to make those tears stop.

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

Suddenly the female youkai fell to the ground at Gojyo's feet. His eyes opened not feeling a bow like he had been expecting. His eyes wandered over his stepmother who was now dead.

'What?' He thought.

His eyes moved from the form of the woman to see Jien standing there, tears streaming from his eyes. He had saved him from dying. Would his death have stopped Jien's tears?

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

Sanzo walked into the room where Komyo stayed. Pushing open the doors he walked in. Soon he was surrounded by darkness. What was going on? There was a snicker and a slash. Blood splattered onto Sanzo's face as he then found Komyo. He had protected him from the demons, and now he lay on the ground in front of him. Tears welled up in his eyes.

'I couldn't protect him.' He thought.

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

Goku had been playing with the bird all day. Finally it seemed like he had a friend. The next morning he woke to see the yellow bird lying on the ground just outside his small prison. What was going on? He tried to reach the bird through the bars but the chains kept him back. He could feel the feathers brush against his fingertips.

'I can't reach him...' He though.

Finally finding it hopeless the monkey king sat back, tears pressing their way to his golden hues then falling down his face. He began to sob loudly. The only friend he ever had was now gone, just like everything else.

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

END