Arrogance of the Dragon.
By James Carmody.
Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy the Vampire Slayer, nor the Hobbit, JRR owns "the Hobbit" and the following/affiliated stories in that series, as for Buffy the Vampire Slayer: that is the property of Joss- till he decides otherwise or dies and his will goes into effect.
Setting: The Hobbit: Mount Erabor, as for Buffy the Vampire Slayer, that's a Slayer Dream and is a bit of an AU as well- it should be interesting.
Summary: Teenage Superheroine Elizabeth {Buffy} Anne Summers has quite the dream of her life- a slayer dream she'll recall for the rest of her life!
Rating: G to PG.
Genre(s): Friendship, Family, Action/Adventure, & Fantasy.
Chapter 1.): "Running with a Thief."
Smaug the terrible was stalking through the financial chambers of the home of the dwarves of Erabor that he'd dispossessed and stalking through the gold coins he'd forced them to abandon, eating, literally here, all the dwarves who stood in his way. He was having serious trouble finding the intruders, Bilbo Baggins and Buffy Summers, and for her part, she couldn't remember at all how she'd come to be involved in *this* situation: running from a dragon, a wyvern actually, and hiding for her life from this being, a monsterous entity who was after consuming her as someone who broke into his home to steal his ill-gotten gains! They could feel the hot breath of the flying reptile and heard his silvery, seductive voice taunting them. Buffy was tempted to merely run out there and reveal herself to him- only thing that saved her life in this situation was the knowledge that if she did that, he'd most certainly have "roast slayer for lunch", as she was completely unarmed, save Mr. Pointy, a gift from Kendra, who it turned out was her stepsister in this scenario.
As time went on, Smaug, apparently bored with his lonely life, played intellectual riddle games with them, especially Bilbo, trying to get them to talk so he could figure out where to aim his fire and roast them alive. "… What did he promise you? A share of the treasure? HA! As if it were his to give! I will not part with a single coin!" then he laid eyes on Bilbo and his companion, who ironically was wearing her pajamas in this bizarre situation. "Seems your companion has a peculiar sense of what to wear in a break-in, thief in the shadows." Smaug burst out laughing heartily, then eyeing Bilbo's eyes on the Archenstone, voiced his final decision, musing just a bit. "I am almost tempted to let you take it…" he said, almost in a whisper, as if deep in thought, "if only to see Oakenshield in torment, to watch it corrupt his heart, and devour him from the inside out. But I think not…"
"Uh-oh." Buffy thought in terror, realizing that the two of them were in mortal danger now, her Slayer senses, the ones she enviously feared weren't given to her by God, but were withheld- this causing a lot of jealousy on her part for her predessors, a kind of "Communion of Saints" in terms of Catholic theology- though she didn't understand much of that, she'd gotten the basics over her days- especially with her Slayer training involving the preternatural; a healthy soul perceives things better than an unhealthy one- she knew that principle intimately now, but how she knew it she couldn't explain. Sure enough, a sideways glance to her right confirmed that the short man named "Bilbo" could see the blaze within the dragon now barreling at them, mouthing prideful boasts "My teeth are as swords, my claws: spears, my wings are a hurricane!" the malevolent reptile proudly proclaimed, and all Miss Summers could think during this was "Wow! Arrogant much?" slipping back into her Scooby Gang Lingo.
Sure enough, just as it shot it's head out to eat Bilbo and her, Bilbo donned the ring, and disappeared from that dimension, and she barreled off to the side, using her Slayer gifts to run and hide, to disappear as she needed, and to make her way out of the mountain fortress of this monster- promising to herself she'd look in on Bilbo, as she was sure from her slayer gifts he had used some kind of sorcery to escape becoming dragon food.
Waking up bold upright, she found Dawn in her room, clothed in her pajamas… Buffy blinked "Dawn, are those *my* pjs?" she asked, getting territorial with her younger sister, then Kendra walked in.
"You shouldn't be mad at Dawn, you know that, Buffy; she cares about you." Kendra said, wearing, and Buffy was astonished at this, exercise clothes, a sleeveless t-shirt in military green, and some cut-off sweat pants. "We heard you screaming, figuring it was a nightmare. Dad is downstairs, as is Mom; we all were worried about you." she said, with a very kind love in her eyes.
"It was so real too; I was literally *in* "The Hobbit" by JRR. Tolken, and was running and hiding from Smaug- the dragon" she explained to her younger sister and her adopted stepsister, then explained to her mom and her stepdad over a cup of hot cafienated drink, be it tea or coffee, she was too alarmed to tell right now, but later on she learned it was tea, as coffee wouldn't be the best thing for her right now- what with the fright she'd had in that nightmare. "All I could think was "Arrogant Much?" when he was issuing those threatful boasts." Buffy explained to her family. Rupert Giles, her stepdad, nodded solemnly, as he grasped this matter- it seemed that his stepdaughter(s) had Somebody Else looking out for them, and for that backup, he was thankful and grateful, as it made his job a lot easier.
The End? Maybe; maybe not… thank you for reading and also, to those who tell me what you think; thank you for that.