The glossy cover, Hank will attest, with its neon purple glow and half-naked female on the front was what drew his attention, not the bold headline and large, curling font that seductively advertised in un-subtle white-on-neon the Eden Club not too far from the precinct.

Not the headline. Nope.

ANDROID SEX OFFICIALLY BETTER

"Jesus..." he muttered to himself, scanning around him briefly to be sure no one was eye-balling before casting his eyes back down to read more of the column dominating the front page.

The magazine in question was a bit dated and had actually been buried under a ton of sports issues, ticketing concerns from IT and general waste at the bottom of Gavin's desk. Protein bar wrappers, old packets of chips, receipts from the dry-cleaners and a handful of napkins otherwise littered the top drawer. Gavin, who had been moved to another precinct since his... falling out with Connor in the evidence room, didn't overly concern himself with emptying his desk out before his move. Hank personally couldn't care less if he came back to collect his crap or not.

The lieutenant had been nice enough to offer to clear out the empty desk for whatever poor soul was replacing him, if only to score some free stuff. Still, it did make him raise a brow to think that Gavin had such an article beneath so much trash, almost like he was hiding it...

He could kind of see why... it was certainly... intriguing...

MOVE OVER LADIES, PLASTIC CAN'T BE BEAT

He tried to hide his indignity behind a scalding sip of coffee, placing the magazine article-down on the desk next to the rest of the stuff as if he was planning on throwing it all in the bin - but to be honest, the damage was already done to his imagination. The offending article would go in the trash, and he would never un-think what he just thought.

Namely the thought of Android sex. Android sex that was better than sex with real, human people.

The burn of the next sip seemed small compared to the war his mind was going through. He wandered back to his desk, placing his cup down next to his half-eaten doughnut, and glanced at Connor's pristine desk beside his haphazard one.

The image conjured up by his imagination at the headline of the article came unbidden into his thoughts again and he jerked his head away. Of Connor, on the well-worn sheets of Hank's bed, naked as the day he was manufactured, gripping the sheets and panting-

Hank grabbed the steaming cup again and gulped a measure, burning the shit out of his mouth.

That stupid article had planted the idea that nearly made him spit out his coffee all over the desk he just spent half the morning rooting through. It wasn't that he didn't... think about it, on occasion - mostly about the... logistics of Android sexual relations. But the idea of Connor of all androids having the capability -

Or even the want to...

If he even could. For all he knew, Connor was as smooth as a mannequin down there.

Hank cleared his throat very loudly, startling one of the officers on the other side of the office.

Sitting down, partly because of the mountain of work waiting for him, mostly because of the problem going on downstairs, no thanks to his current slew of provocative thoughts, he resisted the urge to cross his knees in-case he was making himself too obvious.

Besides, even if his partner did have the... parts, Hank doubted it was something he wished to pursue. Connor had a single minded focus that couldn't be easily swayed by much, which he supposed made sense for a purpose-build android. All be ever did was work. His mandatory days off were treated as a hindrance rather than a time to relax - probably because he just didn't need to.

Just like he didn't need to sleep. Or eat. Piss, shit. Or fuck, for that matter.

The not sleeping thing still creeped the hell out of Hank on the best of occasions. It merely frustrated Connor to be deprived of time he could be spending working, but Jeffrey flat out refused to have him on cases 24/7.

What with their new rights and all.

Hank just wished he'd get a fuckin' hobby that wasn't walking Sumo.

Or get a girlfriend, he mused, rolling his sore tongue along the back of his teeth to try and ease the stinging sensation, aren't all the androids doing that now? Somehow he still doubted that Connor even thought about it. He was certainly at his happiest when his purpose of being a detective was fulfilled and he was bulldozing his way through every single case he could get his hands on, Cold or Active.

Imagine, he thought to himself, Connor with a fuckin' girlfriend. To have all his pomp and finery messed up. Someone to ruffle that perfectly manicured hair, or to pull his tie askew. Someone who didn't take him as seriously as he did himself.

Still, it was interesting to think of all that seriousness and perfection melting away into the messy nature that was sex and pleasure. Hank briefly regretted the image of what Connor might look like with tousled hair squashed into a pillow, a loss of his usual iron focus to make way for something more suited to fucking – but only regretted it, not because it was inappropriate, but because of the pointlessness of it.

Hank was under no illusions – he was a pretty shlubby guy and Connor was... just... exemplary. It would be like touching something impossibly clean and perfect and beautiful with hands that have just been digging through the mud.

And, Connor was an android. Hank didn't do androids.

And, as much as it ate away at his self-consciousness, he was a man in his 50's, and if he really thought about it, depending on when Connor was manufactured, he couldn't be more than a couple of months to maybe a year old, which was kind of fuckin' weird when he thought about it that way.

So why the fuck am I thinking about this...? He asked himself gently as he scrolled through pending cases with half-interest.

Because of the stupid article? Yeah. Because of his overactive imagination? Probably.

Regardless, it wasn't going to happen. What friend didn't occasionally think about how their friends fuck or how they would fuck their friends, right?

Totally nothing wrong with that.