Just a weird, extremely random little fic of mine and nothing more!
Please read and review!
"Oh honey, just look at that little one over there!" the mother squealed to her husband, jabbing with her finger excitedly.
Mr. Herriman's monocle almost shattered upon the floor in surprise as soon as he saw where her finger pointed.
"Excuse me, Ma'am?" he asked her bewilderedly, stunned by her extremely peculiar choice.
"That on, that one! That's the imaginary friend we want!" the stocky brunette shouted, unable to contain her glee. "Oh, he looks absolutely perfect!"
"Uh, Madam," Mr. Herriman unsuccessfully tried to interrupt her, before he was roughly spun around to face the woman's ecstatic-looking husband, who shook the rabbit's gloved hand furiously.
"Oh, thank you so much, Mr. Herriman! You've simply been wonderful to us! We haven't been here ten minutes, and already you're found exactly what we're looking for our little Catherine!" he beamed.
Mr. Herriman gritted his teeth in exertion as he struggled to remove himself from the man's iron grip, all the while glance over to the couple's choice: a small, brown-haired little boy, curled up on a nearby couch and napping peacefully, complete unaware of the commotion.
"Please, Mr. Anderson!" he begged, wincing painfully as the over-enthused man continued to shake his hand vigorously. "I won't lie, I am very much pleased with your decision to come here and adopt one of our many fine figments for your daughter, but I must tell you, that child over there is not – Mrs. Anderson, please!"
The rabbit bellowed in horror as the woman shot off like a bullet. Unable to contain herself in her extreme excitement, "Mrs. Anderson" bolted over to the dozing eight-year-old, squealing like a schoolgirl as she scooped the child into her arms.
"Oh dear, just look at him, he's just so precious!" she cooed in a sickeningly cutesy manner, cradling him like a baby. Quickly, the feeling of being rapidly rocked back and forth finally roused the boy from his dead sleep.
"Huh?" Mac muttered groggily, peering out through bleary eyeballs and confused by the way he was being handled. "What's going-AAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
Upon spotting the woman with the freakishly large smile on her face, plus the rapid realization that this mysterious stranger was holding him tightly in her arms, Mac went into a state of hysteria almost instantly. As his eyes bugged out to almost three times their size in his blind terror, the boy began to immediately squirm about desperately in Mrs. Anderson's iron-tight yet affectionate hold.
"Who are you?" the eight-year-old wailed in horrified confusion, writhing about frantically. "ARGH! Lemmego! Lemmego! Lemmego!"
Completely unfazed by his reaction to her presence, the woman just smiled warmly at the child, hushing him gently as she tightened her hold.
"Shh, don't be scared, little one!" she crooned. "It's be alright! My husband and are here to take you to-"
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Mac screeched to the high heavens as soon as he heard those faithful words. Immediately he tripled his frantic effort to come loose, wiggling about madly in her arms.
"No, please, don't!" he yelled. "Wait, wait, wait! Lady, what are you-"
"Please, miss, I implore you!" Mr. Herriman beseeched as he finally wrenched his hand free, bolting over to the pair. "Drop that child! I'm telling you, he's not-"
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! Put him down! Put him down! Put him dowwwwwwwwn!" the shriek of horror reverberated strongly throughout the room, abruptly cutting off Mr. Herriman in mid-sentence.
The mother yelped in shock as a crimson blur flashed upon the scene, racing through the doorway and clambering over the couch in its panic. Mrs. Anderson didn't even get so much as a second before the frantic-looking redheaded girl launched herself off the piece of furniture and into the air, snatching the eight-year-old from her arms in one swift movement.
THUMP!
"OW! Son of a-"
Unfortunately, Frances "Frankie" Foster's landing wasn't nearly as spectacular as her diving save. With a cry of pain she thudded hard against the floor, skidding a few feet before she came to a full stop. Mac, however, could've cared less about her clumsy finish; the second Frankie had made contact with the ground, the boy threw his arms around her neck and clung onto her for dear life, shivering uncontrollably in his fright.
"Mine, mine! Back off!" Frankie hissed, clutching the child protectively to herself.
"What?" the mother yelled in disbelief. "Miss, just what do you think you're doing?"
"That imaginary friend is for our daughter!" her husband added, darting to her side. "Who are you to march in and-"
"Are you people blind?" Frankie spat. "Mac is not, I repeat, Mac is not an imaginary friend!"
"Then what on earth is he doing here-"
"Everyone, PLEASE!" Mr. Herriman roared, leaping between the two parties.
"Sir, what on earth is she-"
"You can't adopt that child because he belongs to Miss Frances!" the rabbit cut off the husband's protest swiftly. "Master Mac is in her custody, and until only the law says so, he shall remain so! Now all of you, please settle down!" he beseeched.
At this, the couple went into a joint dead silence.
"You mean…you mean he's-"
"Mac." Frankie interjected with a harsh scowl, tightening her hold upon him.
"Sorry, sorry!" the woman apologized immediately, now suddenly look very embarrassed. "You mean…uh, "Mac" is yours?"
"Mine and no one else's." the girl grumbled bitterly.
However, if she wished to add any other snide comments, the redhead never got the chance. Before she knew it, the scarlet-faced mother darted forward and immediately hoisted the girl back to her feet.
"Oh good gracious, I'm so sorry!" she whimpered, brushing Frankie off gently. "I never meant to…oh, I just wanted…he's yours? Oh dear, I'm dreadfully sorry for this, I never-"
"We're terribly sorry for what happened." Her husband mumbled ashamedly to Mr. Herriman. "It's just that we were so excited about-"
"I know, I know! All we wanted was to…oh dear, if you think we actually wanted to take-"
"It's okay, it's okay." Frankie murmured wearily as she checked the still-stunned Mac over for any bruises.
"R-really?" the mother whispered hopefully.
"Unfortunately, this is not the first time Master Mac has been involved in such a dreadful misunderstanding." Mr. Herriman sighed painfully.
"N-not the first time?" the mother gasped, her skin tone abruptly switching from beet-red to ghostly-white in mortified horror.
"Oh dear, I feel awful!" she moaned lamentably, turning back to the lanky redhead. "You poor thing! I-"
"It's okay, don't worry about it." Frankie grumbled. "Trust me, it's not nearly as bad as the time they were about to load him into the car, I can tell you that."
"Not as bad as-oh, for Pete's sake!" the stocky woman gasped. "Oh, and I've done nothing but-"
She cut herself off in mid-sentence as she glanced down worriedly at the spooked eight-year-old in Frankie's arm. "Is he going to be-"
"Don't worry, just give him a half-hour or so, tops, and Mac will be back to normal." Frankie reassured the frazzled mother, all the while gently stroking the boy's head comfortingly.
The mother sighed painfully. "I simply can't say enough about how awful I feel about all of this."
Frankie cracked a wan smile, while Mac just glowered at his would-be adopter warily. "Oh please, stop, everything's going to be okay. It was just a little-"
"I mean, it's bad enough raising your son on your own without worrying about goof-ups like me!" the woman lamented unhappily.
"It's okay, it's okay! Mac's safe, and we all…we're all…everything's gonna be…"
Frankie trailed off as it fully dawned upon her what was just said.
"What?" she gasped, eyes bulging in dumb shock.
"Poor little thing, growing up without a father and all." The woman just continued, flashing Mac a comforting smile. The boy just whimpered uncomfortably and tightened his hold upon his big sister.
Frankie, however, failed to notice the boy's squeeze. She just stood there dumbly, simply unable to believe what she was hearing.
"M-Mac? My….my son? And me, a…a mo…a moth…a…a…"
"It's okay, dearie." The woman whispered, patting her shoulder reassuringly. "There's no shame in being a single mother, it's alright, it's….are you alright?"
It was no use. Frankie had been struck mute in her shock, and looked like she was about to keel over any second.
"Oh c'mon, Frankie." Wilt said reassuringly with a weak smile as he settled the laundry basket in his arm down next to her. "So that lady thought that you were-"
"Wilt, please, I'm not in the mood." The redhead cut him off, scowling bitterly as she flung laundry into an open washing machine.
"Frankie, c'mon, it's okay!" the irrepressibly upbeat imaginary friend continued. "Like I said, just this once, some lady mistook you for Mac's mom this morning! Now just how can you be so sour about-"
"Just once…yeah, right." Frankie muttered darkly to herself.
Wilt paused, taken off guard by her reply.
"Um, excuse me?" he asked her innocently.
"You heard what I said." The girl spat venomously, not even bothering to glance in his direction. Wilt cringed.
"There are….others?" he asked, pulling a face. Frankie just responded with a heavy sigh.
"Just one or two, right?" the lanky imaginary friend asked hopefully.
"You tell me. Does the entire faculty at Mac's school count as one?" Frankie snapped angrily.
Wilt gasped, that obviously not being the reply he was expecting. "Wait, what? Everyone at Mac's school?"
Frankie let out a long, aggravated groan as she collapsed miserably into a nearby pile of laundry.
"Wilt….did you know that Mac's mom never showed up to parent-teacher conferences?" she whined unhappily.
Wilt scratched his head bewilderedly. "Uh, could your clear that up a little?"
"For God's sake, whenever I go to any of those things, everyone's got at least eight years on me!" the girl muttered ruefully. "Everyone thinks I'm some weird, underage mother!"
Wilt grimaced, resting an arm around her shoulders as he settled down beside her. "Frankie…"
"You would've thought they'd notice something when Mac's last name suddenly changed to Foster a few months ago, but no-oo!" Frankie continued to rant furiously. "No, instead they treat me as if I used to be an out-of-control teenager, with results to show!"
"Well….are you sure it's just not all in your head?" her imaginary friend suggested hopefully. Frankie just shot him a cold glare.
"Yes Wilt, it's all in my head." She sneered sarcastically. "It's all in my head that the teachers give me weird looks when I pick up Mac from school! It's all in my head that I've only been getting those "tips" from some people Adopt-a-Thought Saturday since I adopted Mac! It's all in my head that those people's kids all happen to be in Mac's grade! It's all in my head that too many people treat me as if I was a teenaged slut! Yes Wilt, it's just that easy, it's only all in my head!"
Finished with her outburst, the flushed looking girl let her head rest limply on Wilt's shoulder, gulping in large gasps of air as she struggle to catch her breath. Wilt frowned as he ruffled her hair affectionately.
"There, there….it's okay…."
"It's so weird…the thought of Mac and me…me being his…." Frankie shuddered violently.
"Frankie, it's alright." Wilt continued, gently setting an arm around her shoulders.
"Big sister, not his mom….for God's sake, I didn't get pregnant when I was-"
"Well, at least you've telling them the truth about you two whenever you get those "tips, right?" Wilt interjected optimistically.
At this Frankie just whimpered and mumbled something inaudible in response. Wilt cocked his head.
"You…you have been refusing those, haven't you?" he asked hopefully with a wan grin. "Because you're only getting them…because…"
He trailed off as he spotted the bright shade of scarlet that had blanketed the young woman's features.
"M-maybe." She whispered a bit guiltily, preferring to stare at her sneakers than make eye contact. Wilt groaned and shook his head in exasperation.
"Oh, c'mon, you've got to be-"
"There's nothing wrong with a little pocket change now, is there?" Frankie asked with a feeble chuckle.
Wilt just stared at her, stonefaced. "No, Frankie."
"Aw, c'mon, it's not-"
"No, Frankie."
"Just a little-"
"No, Frankie.
"Just one or two more?"
"No, Frankie."
"But it's just a little…c'mon, you know the bunny hasn't given me a pay raise in a while, and-"
"And that's why you get permission to aggravate your own problem?" Wilt groaned.
"Well…maybe just a little bit." Frankie whispered bashfully.
Wilt frowned and narrowed his eyes, an unusual transformation from his usually amiable demeanor. Frankie gulped nervously, recognizing his particular rare scowl.
"Hey, c'mon, all I'm saying is-EEEEEEK!"
Most of the time, Wilt was simply too kind-hearted to even hurt a fly. Then again, when dealing with his "kid," there was always something to be said about tough love. Without even blinking, Wilt wrapped a winding appendage tightly around her waist and easily hefted the squealing girl into the air, flipping her upside down and shaking her from side to side like a mother dog chastising a rowdy puppy.
"AAA! No, no, no!" Frankie wailed in protest as she swung back and forth like a pendulum.
"Frankie, just say it!" Wilt ordered her sternly.
"No!"
"Frankie, say it!"
"No!"
"Frankie, just do it!"
"I need the money!"
"Frankie, just get it over with!"
"Never!"
"FRANKIE!" the lanky imaginary friend shouted austerely, increasing the pace of his disciplinary action. Frankie squealed unhappily as her world became a blur, and her stomach did a complete flip-flop.
"AUGH! Okay, you win! You win!" she yelped in submission. "I get it already! No more "tips!" I promise! I promise! Please, no! I'm gonna be sick! I'm gonna be sick! Wilt, please, put me dowwwwwwwn!"
Frankie groaned as she prayed fervently nausea to go away and leave her in peace. She thought she had been through the last of that when he had caught her cheating one-too-many times on her homework, but… he wasn't afraid to do it when she was acting bratty as a five-year-old, and her increase in age obviously had no effect on him.
Unfortunately, despite having just dealt with that, she couldn't even have the opportunity to chew him out for treating her like a bratty child. These instances were rare, at best, and no matter what happened, Wilt was still Wilt. Once the disciplinary action was complete, not only did he bombard her with the usual barrage of apologies, but he even carried her down to her favorite couch for her to relax her troubled stomach. Even then he wasn't done, fetching her a cool glass of water, some medicine for her aching gut, and her favorite book while he was it.
Some things never change. She thought briefly. Sighing heavily, Frankie picked up her book and snuggled into the couch, desperately trying to push the day's past events clear from her mind. However, she barely read four sentences before she head the chime of the doorbell, quickly followed by a chorus of excited squeals. Peering over her book, Frankie smiled warmly as she spotted the little azure blob and the oddly attired, pigtailed little girl scuttle in from the foyer.
"Hey, Goo." The redhead greeted kindly, holding up her hand for a high five.
"Hiya, Frankie!" Goo chirped happily as she slapped Frankie's palm, her usual ridiculously cheerful toothy grin plastered across her features. "How ya doin'?"
"I'm doin' just fine, thanks. I think Mac's in the arcade right now with Ed and Coco, I'm sure Bloo will take you there." She replied, nodding towards the azure blob.
"Okay!" Goo squeaked happily in agreement, bouncing up and down excitedly in prospect of spending a fun-filled afternoon with her friends. Looking as if she was about to burst in her never-ending zest for life, Frankie snorted laughed at the quirky little girl and ruffled her hair playfully.
"If you guys need anything, I'm gonna be right here reading, okay? You two have fun now!" she said in a merry singsong tone of voice.
With that, the girl buried her face back into her novel. However, she only got a few sentences of reading in before she realized something seemed very….off at the moment, to say the very least. Frankie glanced up from her book to find that much to her surprise, both child and imaginary friend had not budged an inch. Rather, the pair just eyed her curiously in dead silence, as if they were an attraction at a circus sideshow.
"Um…you two okay?" Frankie asked as she cocked an eyebrow, breaking the awkward silence.
"So is it true?" Goo blurted out none-too-gently as she continued to keep her gaze fixated upon the redhead.
Frankie just stared at the duo dumbly, utterly confused.
"Well…at least I think Mac's in the arcade right now…if not, you two should check the-"
"No, no! Not that!" Bloo abruptly interrupted her, waving his stubby appendages wildly. "We want…we…we want to know the truth!"
Again, Frankie just glanced back at the two like a deer caught in headlights. "Um, look, to be honest, I'm not exactly sure where he is right now, but-"
"No, no, no! The truth! The truth!" Bloo just persisted, tugging at her arm pleadingly.
"Bloo, what truth? I'm telling you, all I know is-"
"Is it true that Mac is really your long-lost son but since you were only a teenager and stuff when he was born you had to give him up for adoption only to be like reunited with him years lately due to an unlikely turn of events which is why you're so protective of him like the mother lioness I saw in this nature documentary last night which my dad didn't want me to watch because he said it was too late but I got him to let me do it because I said it was educational and good for my development but that's really beside the point so anyway is that the reason you punched out some crazy lady this morning when she was trying to take Mac away and when people asked about it you try and hide it by saying he's only your little brother when in reality you're only hiding the deep-dark truth about your own mysterious past?" Goo managed to babble out in one breath.
For the next minute, the room was cloaked in a dead silence.
"WHAT?" Frankie shrieked as loudly as her lung capacity would enable her.
"Well, all I asked if Mac was your son and you were actually his real mom and-" the girl casually began to repeat herself, as if the twenty-two-year-old before her didn't just almost burst her lungs. As she prattled on calmly, Frankie's jaw hung limply in dumb shock, stammering uncontrollably.
"You think…I…yeah but…but…b-b-but…"
Finally, she narrowed her eyes furiously and turned to face Bloo with a growl.
"You!" she hissed, jabbing accusingly at him. "You did this!"
"Yeah, but only-" the little blob tried to explain, looking badly hurt by her reaction.
"I see you talked to Wilt, but where the heck did you come up with most of that?" the appalled girl demanded. "I mean, honestly! In the name of everything sacred-"
"I-"
"No, no, not even that! Bloo, how on earth did you manage to tell Goo about all of that between here and the front door? You only had ten, twenty seconds, tops!"
"C'mon Frankie, that's not what's important now!" Goo protested. "What's important is that you need to come to terms with your own past!"
"I didn't get pregnant when I was fourteen!" Frankie shrieked furiously.
Goo frowned as she began to pat the young woman's shoulder comfortingly. "I know it's not gonna be easy and stuff, but my parents say that-"
"Goo, I don't care what your parents have to say! I'm not Mac's biological mother! I'm not, I'm not, I'm not!" Frankie denied persistently, banging her fists repeatedly upon the sofa. "I'm not-oh for heaven's sake, now what is it?" she groaned wearily, glancing back to Bloo.
The little imaginary friend wrung his little "hands" furiously staring straight into her gaze with teary puppy-dog eyes. "I…I was just wondering…"
"Oh, please, Bloo, I've already said it before, I'm not-"
"Can…c-can I…can I call you Mom?" Bloo asked meekly with all the innocence of a toddler.
With this simple question, Frankie was struck mute in dumb shock. Her jaw dropped, her eyes seemed ready they to bug out of her sockets, and her skin turned so deathly pale it looked as if she was about to turn translucent.
"For the love of God and all that is holy…." She managed to mutter in a hoarse whisper.
"I…I…" Bloo stuttered nervously, before slowly easing his way to the dumbstruck young woman's side and wrapping one of her arms in a tight hug.
"I never had a real mom before…" he said softly with a weak smile. Frankie continued to just stared at the little imaginary friend, before she stated flatly;
"Bloo…WHAT ON EARTH MAKES YOU THINK I'M YOUR MOTHER?" she howled, almost rocking the house off its foundations with the volume of her outraged cry.
"Well, it makes sense, doesn't it?" Goo jabbered excitedly, bouncing up and down furiously in her intense excitement. "Mac is your son right? And since Bloo is Mac's imaginary friend, doesn't that make you Bloo's mom?"
"Oh, of course that makes perfect sense!" the redhead snapped sarcastically. "Except the little tiny part about EVERYTHING THAT YOU JUST SAID!"
"Mommy, please!" Bloo just whined pitifully, tightening his hold upon her.
"Bloo, get off of me!" Frankie growled, unsuccessfully trying to undo his iron-tight hug. "For Pete's sake, did you ever call Mac's mom that at all?"
"But you're Mac's mom!" Goo just pointed out excitedly.
"That doesn't even make any sense!" came the snarled reply.
"That doesn't make any sense? You're the one who's not making any sense!" the child countered, going off on another tangent. "I mean, seriously! Why did you give up Mac for adoption while you were a teenaged mom only to take him back later? Do you remember who Mac's dad was, or was your rowdy teen years before that just a blur, before you found out you were gonna be a mommy? Did your grandma and the badger freak out and go nuts about it? Did you freak out and go nuts about it?"
Helplessly overstimulated and swept up in the excitement, the hyperactive girl chattered on and on, bombarding the caretaker with question after question. Meanwhile, Bloo sighed happily as he snuggled up close against her.
"Mommy…." He whispered contentedly.
"ARGH!" Frankie yelled in aggravation, clamping a hand tightly to her forehead. "I've got annoying in stereo!"
"Don't fight it!" Gloo squealed. "You can't hide from you past forever, y'know!"
"Just watch me!" Frankie yelled determinedly, and with a wild burst of effort she ripped the blob clean off her arm and tossed him against some cushions. The second she was free, the young woman scrabbled madly over the sofa and bolted off in the direction of the nearest staircase.
"Both of you, just leave me-WHOA!" she yelped in surprise as she felt something latch tightly onto the back of her leg, instantly causing her to lose her balance and send her slamming to the floor.
"OOF! What the-?"
"No, Mommy, no!" Bloo wailed unhappily, tightening his clutch upon her leg with every passing second. "Mommy, please!"
Frankie squealed in dismay as she immediately tried to yank the little imaginary fried off her leg. "Bloo, for the love of God, I'm not your mother! Now get off! Get off! Get off!"
"But I love you, Mommy!" Bloo just whined in persistence, squeezing her leg harder with every tug.
"Bloo, stoppit! I'm a caretaker, a big sister, a legal guardian, but I'm not-"
"Don't forget "mother"!" Goo piped up.
"Oh yeah, and a mother too, but I'm not your-HEY!"
"I knew it! I knew it!" the girl squeaked in delight.
"YOU'RE NOT HELPING!" Frankie hissed in aggravation. "Both of you, please, I'm say it again, I'm nobody's mother! Not Mac's, not Bloo's, not-" she beseeched fervently.
"No Mommy, don't say it!" Bloo pleaded miserably.
"For God's sake, Bloo! First you think I'm in love with Mac, then you think I'm his biological mother? And yours, too? Stoppit, just stoppit! Now please, GET OFF!" she yelled, violently shaking her leg.
"But that was before I knew the truuuuth!" Bloo whined, clamping on to her like a barnacle to a shipwreck. "No, Mom, no!"
"Bloo, if you don't let go in the next five seconds, I swear, I'm gonna-"
Before Frankie could complete her threat, the little imaginary friend suddenly released his hold upon her leg and scrambled up her body furiously.
"BUT I LOVE YOOOOOUUUUUU!" he wailed piteously, throwing his stubby arms about her neck and glomping onto her like a magnet to a refrigerator.
"NO, NO, NO!" Frankie shrieked to the high heavens, throwing up her arms and struggling furiously to tear the emotional creature off of her. "I'M NOT YOUR MOM! I'M NOT MAC'S MOM! I'M NOT ANYONE'S MOM!"
With this announcement she screamed furiously with ever ounce of lungpower she possessed, tugging furiously at Bloo.
"Ooooh, hold on! Hold on! Lemme help!" Goo yelped excitedly, and without a second thought she lunged forward and dived into the muddle of redhead and imaginary friend.
Frankie's eyes bulged in terror as she watched the giggling child sail through the air.
"EEEK! No, wait, no, no, no, no-OWCH!" she grunted as Goo landed squarely upon her gut. "OW! MY STOMACH! YOU LANDED RIGHT ON MY STOMACH! WHY YOU-"
"Help is on the way!" Goo yelled heroically, wrapping her little arms around Bloo and pulling furiously, quickly adding to the chaos as they collapsed into a muddled pile of flailing limbs and screams.
"No! Not me! Help me, Mommy!" Bloo squealed, instantly tightening his already ridiculously firm grip upon the young woman's neck. Frankie gagged as his little arms cut off her windpipe.
"ACCCK! Bloo, Bloo!" she whispered huskily. "I can't…you're…air! Need…air!"
"Mommy, make the nasty girl go away!"
"I'm not your mo-AUGH! Stoppit, stoppit! Leggo! For God's sake, leggo my neck!"
"Hold on, Frankie! C'mere, you!"
"MOMMMMMM!"
"Someone, PLEASE! I think I'm gonna pass out!"
"Hey, I know CPR-"
"NO WAY! Both of you, get off of me!"
"Leave Mommy and me alone!"
"FRANKIE!"
"GOO!"
"MOMMY!"
"I-"
"Good heavens, what is going on here?" the shocked roar suddenly reverberated throughout the room, cutting through the racket like a hot knife through butter.
Frankie's blood ran cold as soon as she spotted shocked glare coming from the all-too-familiar face of her employer. Even worse, right beside the stunned Mr. Herriman was another prospective couple, looking for an imaginary friend for their child but obviously finding much more than they originally planned.
"M-Miss Frances…" Mr. Herriman gasped in a trembling voice, shocked beyond disbelief by the utterly bizarre site before him. "What are you…why were you…what on earth was all that commotion that we-"
"Dear Lord…." The husband murmured incredulously. "She's…she's going into labor!"
Upon hearing these words, Frankie looked as if she was about to faint. "WHAT? What do you mean I –OH NO!"
She screeched in horror as soon as you finally observed the results of her terrific struggle. Bloo was still clinging to her tightly. However, that was only evident due to the fact that there was a large bulge in her jacket.
Her sweater was zipped up….
Bloo was trapped under it…
Goo whimpered as she tugged feebly at her vibrant, rainbow-colored shirt sleeve…
Which was jammed firmly in the zipper.
"Oh no…oh no…no, no, no, no, no!" The girl yelled in horror, pulling frantically at the stubborn zipper. Beads of a nervous sweat dripping down her forehead, she shot a look of horrified panic.
"Please, no! It's not what you think! I just – Goo, pull harder!" she barked frenetically.
"I'm tryin', I'm tryin'!" the girl whined, yanking wildly.
"No, you're not! C"mon, we- oh puh-leeze, you all have to believe me! It's not what you think, it's just that I- Bloo, get out of there!"
Unfortunately, Bloo uttered nothing more than a muffled sigh of content, audible only to the redhead and little girl. Frankie screeched in exasperation as she went back to opening her garment once again.
Mr. Herriman opened his mouth to interject, but before he could make a sound, the stocky mother behind him gasped in terror as she stepped forward firmly.
"Oh, you poor thing! Don't worry, help is here!"
"No, really!" Frankie squawked hysterically. "It's not what you think, I'm-"
"Dear, it's okay! I'm a professional nurse, I can helped you!" the woman tried to say reassuringly. Unfortunately, her statement did not have the intended effect.
"Oh, God no…" the redhead whispered, her blood running cold in her veins.
"Mrs. O'Hare, no!" Mr. Herriman blurted out frantically in an attempt to save the distressed caretaker from a humiliating ordeal. "I assure, there's no need to-"
"Don't worry, it'll be alright!" the husband assured the rabbit, grabbing him by the arm and yanking him back. "Margaret's the very best, you'll see!"
"What? No! Neither of you understand! Miss Frances is not pregnant!" Mr. Herriman roared desperately.
"Now come here, dear." The heavyset woman continued, advancing slowly. "It's okay, you and your baby are going to be just-"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Frankie screeched. Without a second though, the young woman bolted to her feet, tugged Goo under her arm, and bolted off, running as fast as her legs could carry her.
"Ma'am, please!" the trained nurse cried out worriedly, taking pursuit. "Don't run! Y-you're baby, it's not good for your-"
"It's not my baby! It's not my baby! I'M NOT A MOMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!" Frankie's anguished pleas rang throughout the household.
As soon as the peculiar yell reached her ears, Madame Foster sighed heavily as she set down her teacup. Groaning wearily, the petite elderly woman shut her eyes tightly as she bean to rock back and forth in her chair, desperately trying to block out the sounds of what appeared to be a chase of some sort.
"I don't want to know, I don't want to know, I don't want to know…."
"My favorite sweater." Frankie mumbled ruefully as she glanced over her tattered garment, the zipper ripped clean off.
"Sorry, Frankie." Goo muttered unhappily as she plodded alongside the exhausted girl. Frankie sighed as she gave the child a reassuring pat on the head.
"It's okay, it's not your fault. I mean, we had to get it off somehow."
"Yeah, I guess. Lucky we just got the opportunity to do so." Goo agreed weakly before peering over to the brown-haired child walking along on the other side of Frankie.
"Hey, Mac? Thanks for…well…"
"It's okay." The eight-year-old waved it aside. "It wasn't anything, I just found that storage closet with a little extra space, that's all."
"Correction; you found a storage closet with a little extra space just before I was about to have a kid right there in the hallway, according to the nutjob of a parent who chased me halfway around the house."
"Don't remind me." Goo added unhappily. "That lady was absolutely crazy.
"Well, at least you're okay." Frankie interjected, patting the girl softly on the head.
"But what about Bloo?" Goo whimpered.
Frankie grimaced. "Well, he was kinda freaked out, but I think he'll calm down after he gets some rest, and hopeless gets his logic back."
For the next few minutes, the trio continued to plod wordlessly down the hallway, all a bit worn-out from the events of just a half-hour before.
"Do you know that my Mom sings me the same lullaby that you sang to Bloo?" Goo blurted out, only able to deal with silence for so long. Frankie groaned, rolling her eyes.
"Oh please, don't bring that up. It was bad enough I had to rock the little weirdo back to sleep, don't remind me that I actually had to-"
"Sorry, sorry!" the little girl whispered quickly, clamping her hands tightly over her mouth to show she was serious. At the sight of the embarrassed little child, Frankie couldn't but help crack a wan smile.
"Here, about this? To make it up, how about you and Mac take my sweater and bring it to Madame Foster's room, okay? She should be able to patch it up in no time. You remember where it is, right?"
"Okay!" Goo squeaked in eager compliance, immediately breaking out into her a large toothy smile. In a few deft movements she snatched the tattered garment out of the young woman's hands and shot off down the hallway like a bullet.
"C'mon, Mac! Let's go!" she whooped, tearing off.
"Off you go pal, before you lose her." Frankie ordered the little boy gently, giving him a soft push. As soon as she forced Mac a few paces, the redhead immediately turned around and lurched a few paces into her room nearby. Without even so much as a second glance, Frankie wearily threw herself upon her bed, letting her lanky frame go limp as soon as she made contact with the mattress.
"Oh, God…" she murmured exhaustedly under her breath, burying her face deep into her pillows. "Why me? Why-"
"F-Frankie?"
Before Frankie could get far into a good self-pity session, a soft, trembling voice interrupted her whispered lamenting. Despite the fact that she was really in no mood to talk to anyone at the moment, she nevertheless answered the familiar voice.
"Mac, I thought I told you to go with Goo." She grumbled in a muffled plea, not even bothering to look up and face the boy.
"Yeah…yeah, I know." She heard Mac respond meekly as he slowly made his way into the room. "It's just that I-"
The redhead sighed painfully. "Please, Mac, I'm really not in the mood to talk right now. Maybe later." She cut in with grumble.
"But...but today…everyone-" Mac continued, and from the sound of the soft squeak of sneakers, she could tell he was getting closer.
"Mac, I really, really need some time alone. Not now." The girl stated flatly.
"I know, but-" the child cautiously persisted.
Frankie gritted her teeth, clenching her pillow tightly at his stubbornness. This was getting annoying, fast, and she simply did not have the patience to deal with this.
"Look, Mac, just one hour!" She hissed irritably, raising her voice in her rapidly growing agitation. "That's all I need, and if you even think that you're gonna get anything out of me before that, I'm…well, I'm gonna-"
Before she could finish, she felt an extra weight clamber atop the mattress, immediately followed by a pair of arms wrap around her midriff, embracing her in a tight squeeze. Startled, she lifted her head from her pillow and glanced behind her.
"Mac?" she asked curiously.
Hugging her gently, the boy whimpered as he rested his head on her back.
"I'm…I'm sorry, Frankie." He whined guiltily, staring back at her sadly.
"Sorry?" the redhead asked bewilderedly, her anger quickly draining away.
"You know…about what happened today…everyone was freaking out because they though you…no, they though I was…I…."
Mac blushed a brilliant shade of crimson in his mortified embarrassment before he trailed off.
"S-sorry." He murmured one last time, his eyes glistening as they slowly began to well up.
Now, Frankie had been through quite a bit that day, more than most human beings would be able to stand even if it was just a fraction of the madness she had just experienced drawn out over a week. The young woman had to deal with crazed couples who wished to adopt first and ask question later, followed being shaken like a snowglobe in the laundry room. Just hours before, she had been running wildly around the house from a licensed nurse who was much too eerily willing to help her with her "baby." Plus the fact that she had just spent half an hour prying a hysterical little blob off of her and another half-hour rocking him to sleep, she by all logic should've been ready explode on the very next being who happened to be foolish enough to cross her path.
Yet….at the sight of the miserable little boy standing dutifully by her side, arms wrapped tightly about her as he heaped the blame for it all upon herself., she new right then and there she could in no way curl up into a fetal position and accept defeat for the day right there. The icy crust on the girl's heart melted within moments as a wave of tender affection for the devoted little eight-year-old swept over her. A genuine smile swept across her features as she scrambled into a sitting position.
"Oh jeez, pal! What are you talkin' about?" She chuckled lightly, reaching out and pulling the little boy close. "Oh, c'mere, you."
"I didn't mean to…" Mac whined as she settled him gently upon her lap.
"Shh, it's okay." She hushed him softly, throwing her arms around him in a warm bear hug. "It's okay, it's not your fault."
"But all day everyone was thinking that I was your…y'know…" he whimpered, returning the embrace.
For the next few minutes, the young woman just rocked back and forth, hugging the unhappy eight-year-old closely.
"Mac…sometimes, people are just…well, stupid, I guess." Frankie whispered with a weak smile.
"I guess…." Mac muttered, snuggling into her chest.
"Can't do too much about that, pal. We just gotta take it as it comes, and stick together through it, okay?" she said, putting the none-too-happy reality forward as gently as she could.
Mac looked up into her eyes with a frown.
"Still though…I-"
Frankie couldn't help but laugh as she coddled him closely. "Still with the blame? Mac!" she giggled, pinching his cheek affectionately." You are just, precious, did you know that?" she cooed.
"Hey, c'mon!" Mac protested with a weak smile. "Quit it!"
"Oh, lighten up, you! It's not like I'm the only one in this house who's dealt with this kind of thing." Frankie countered, rolling her eyes.
Mac groaned. "Frankie, I'm eight. When have I ever-"
"Don't fib, pal." Frankie chuckled as she grinned fiendishly. "You know exactly what I'm talking about, Mac...or should I say…."
Mac cocked an eyebrow as he eyed her warily. "What?"
"Daaady…." The girl crooned, plastering a goofy smile on her face as she bugged out her eyeballs.
Mac squealed in surprise and punched her shoulder softly.
"Hey, no!" he cried indignantly, remembering all –too-well the monstrously annoying imaginary friend she imitated. "Stop it, we are not bringing up that into-"
"I like cereal!" Frankie just continued in an outrageously nasally tone of voice, prodding the child playfully in the stomach.
"No! Stoppit! Enough of the Cheese impressions!" The eight-year-old protested. Despite his indignant objections, however, Mac couldn't help but smile weakly as he passed a glance at the ridiculous expression on the redhead's face. Frankie grinned as soon as she spotted this and persisted happily.
"I like chocolate milk!"
"Hey, quit it!" Mac tried to object while struggling to stifle a chuckle.
"Yeah, I like potatoes!" Frankie went on. "Potatoes smell, like flowers!"
With this particular quote from the most annoying imaginary creature to ever enter the doors of Fosters, Mac simply wasn't able to hold it in anymore. Quickly, the child clasped his hands tightly over his mouth in a last-ditch attempt to keep his composure.
As soon as she heard the audible muffled laughter, Frankie snickered fiendishly as she tightened her hold upon him, using a free hand to tickle his stomach furiously.
"Do it again do it again do it again do it again do it again do it again do it again!" she babbled, keeping up the act while Mac squealed uproariously in laughter.
"Ackpth! Hahaha! Stoppit! Stop-heehee! Knock it off, Frankie!" he managed to squeak, squirming about desperately to escape her tickly grip.
"Frankie? Frankie" Who's Frankie?" the girl giggled. "I'm not Frankie anymore! Now I'm a horsey! Baaa! Baaaaaaa!"
"Heeheehee! Quit it! Quit it! That's it, if you're gonna play dirty-" Mac laughed, reaching up to give her ponytail a playful tug.
"Now you're the horesy! Giddy up!" Frankie squealed, grabbing the eight-year-old by the arms and pinning him down upon her bed.
"No fair! No fair!" Mac managed to yelp. "You're way too-"
"I'm a lady." Frankie whispered, as an all-too-familiar fiendish grin plastered itself upon her features. Mac squeaked in horror as he immediately began to writhe about ferociously under her firm hold, knowing exactly what was to come of this.
"No, please! Don't tell me Bloo told you all about that! No! No! No, not-AAAAAUUUUGGGGGH!" he yelled in disgust as Frankie leaned in to plant a ludicrously sloppy kiss on his cheek.
"Now we're brother ladies!" she cried triumphantly, sweeping him back into her arms and wrapping the boy in a crushing bear hug. At this, Mac collapsed in a mad fit of the giggles, helplessly caught up in the silly moment.
"Haha! Stoppit! Mom, cut it out!" he yelled.
"Never!" Frankie gleefully refused, nuzzling him happily. "I'm not letting my special little guy go any-"
The full realization of what just happened struck her like a thunderbolt. Instantly the girl went mute in dumb shock, the rest of her sentence perishing upon her lips along with her laughter. Stupidly, the stunned Frankie just clutched the child in her arms, jaw hanging agape in her surprise.
Mac however did not object to her rapid transformation. Realizing too with extreme horror the faithful word that had been uttered from his mouth, the eight-year-old went as silent and still as a statue, sitting limply in Frankie's arms.
The room was hurled into a deafening silence. For the next few minutes, the pair remained as they were, resembling for all the world like an exhibit from a wax museum. Finally though, after a few tense moments that felt like hours, Frankie finally managed to maneuver Mac in her arms so they face each other eye-to-eye.
"M-Mac?" she inquired in a stunned whisper. "Did you just….did you just call me…d-did you just say…"
"I…I did…." Mac whimpered, staring at her through large, unblinking eyeballs.
Again, more dead silence encompassed the bedroom.
"Okaaaaaaaay….this is weird…." Frankie murmured.
"Yeah….yeah, it is." Mac agreed softly.
Yet another period of silence settled upon the pair. Frankie squirmed about awkwardly, anxiously chewing her lower lip.
"You…you wanna…um…you…"
"I KNEW IT!" a jubilant cry shattered the quiet. Before the shocked siblings had a time to react, a little azure blur flashed in from the doorway, leaping into the air and flying into Frankie with the force of a miniature battering ram.
"AUGH!" Frankie screamed as she was rammed clear off her bed, dropping Mac in the process and tumbling head-over-heel onto the floor.
"I knew it, I knew it!" Bloo squealed as he glomped onto her joyfully. "I knew you couldn't hide it forever! Oh, Mommy!"
"Not AGAIN!" Frankie shrieked in exasperation, immediately working furiously to yank the blob off of her and undo his rapidly tightening grip. "Bloo, you're supposed to be asleep!" she scolded him sternly.
"But I couldn't help it! I just couldn't! I just had to…and then you said…oh, we're a family again!" he squeaked joyfully, snuggling into the crook of Frankie's neck.
"Bloo, what are you talking about?" Mac cried indignantly, leaping to the floor. "Finally a family? Bloo you're not even making any sense!"
"We can work that later, after we get him off!" Frankie screeched, putting on an extra burst of effort. With this extra bit of exertion, she finally managed to rip Bloo off of her, flinging him away like a grenade about to go off.
"No, Mommy, no!" Bloo wailed in protest, scrambling back onto stable footing the instant he made contact with the floor. "Mommy, don't!
"EEEK!" Frankie cried in horror as he darted towards her. "Get away, get away!"
"Mothers and children don't run away from each other!" Bloo pleaded. "They gotta hug!"
"No! No! NO!" the redhead bellowed in refusal, desperately backing away as fast as she could. "I'm not your mom! I'm not your mom! For the last time, I'm not-"
"A hug, just one hug! Why won't you hug me Mommy?" the little blob beseeched pitifully, steadily making his way towards her.
"Get away, get away! Oh please, get away from me!" the girl replied, scooting away on her rear and half-blind with the terror.
"HUG MEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Bloo cried, diving forward.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Frankie howled, leaping to her feet and jumping away just in time. The second she was on proper footing, she bolted out of her home and tore off down the hallway, her "child" in hot pursuit.
"Mommy, I love you! I love you! I love you, Mommy! Please, hug me!" Bloo, begged, hot on her heels.
"I'M NOBODY'S MOTHER! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Frankie just cried, throwing up her arms in the air as she bounded down the nearest staircase, taking the steps four at a time.
Mac just stood there silently in the hallway, watching the pair race out of view, their cries still echoing loudly through the entire mansion. The boy's jaw hung limply, unable to comprehend what just happened before his very eyes.
Suddenly, he snapped out of his dumb shock as soon as he felt a hand lightly touch his shoulder.
"Mac?" a familiar voice piped up softly.
"Yeah, Goo?"
"Did you just see…well, I was on my way back when I saw-"
"Yeah, yeah I did."
"Oh."
For a few moments the two children stood there, furiously trying to make some shred of sense of the day's events.
"Mac…have we learned anything from this?" Goo asked, completely dumbfounded.
"Yeah." Mac replied. "This is one of those situations you never talk about again."
With this the boy went silent, wincing as he heard a peculiarly loud scream and a crash emit from downstairs.
"Wait, I'm still a little confused." Goo mused bewilderedly. "If your Frankie's son…and Frankie is Bloo's mom….does that make Bloo your brother?"
Mac groaned and glowered at his friend irritably.
"Oh, put a sock in it, will ya.?"
The End
Well, there you have it! No real point, just felt like writing it!
Thanks for reading it, everyone! Please review!