Disclaimer: I don't own Castle or any Castle content.
It happened quickly and without warning. In her heart, she knew she wasn't ready for him, but her brain couldn't completely understand why. So clothes came off hurriedly and the kisses were few.
She had spent the 15 minutes it took to walk to his house to go over what she would say, how to express that she just couldn't be what he needed yet. But when he opened the door, her emotions took over and it made that idea seem ridiculous.
Kate Beckett wasn't the soft type. She told it straight and wanted the same courtesy in return.
"Take your clothes off," she said.
"Okay," he responded, without question.
And as he unbuckled his pants and tossed his shirt to the side, she thought, for at least a moment, that they could make this work. She thought they might have a chance—
And then he bit down on the soft skin of her neck and she stopped thinking. There were no thoughts about relationships or whether she was truly over the shooting or her mother's death. There were only hands and tongues and legs and, if she was being honest, she liked it better that way.
He had her pinned against the wall, both completely naked, but stopped and looked straight into her eyes. He didn't say anything, but she heard exactly what he was asking and it twisted something in her heart just the slightest.
"Just fuck me Castle," she responded. Her voice was dripping with uncertainty and he knew it was the wrong thing to do, but he could never resist her command. So he kissed her once, more deeply than she was ready for, but exactly what she needed. She let out a soft moan and as he slowly entered her, they both felt the other relax, because the hardest part was over.
He kept moving slowly, allowing her to get used to him, while working on her neck and leaving bruises in his wake.
"Faster," she said with a breathy moan and he obliged. Quickening the pace and leaving her gasping.
She could feel herself building inside and she worried that it might be too much. She hadn't had this feeling before and that scared her. She felt him start to lose control, slamming into her even faster.
"Oh god, Castle don't stop," she said as she felt herself on the precipice of oblivion.
They only lasted 3 more strokes before they both came, hard.
"Beckett! Fuuuuuuuuck!" he said in a low moan while she let out a strangled cry.
Clothes covered the floor and their moans filled the air as they lay there, speechless and panting. While it seemed like hours, time passed like it always did with them, slowly but always faster than they wanted.
"Is this how it has to be?" he asked.
"For now," she said fearfully, but honestly. She knew he might not take it, though, that he might want more.
She watched him as he stared at the ceiling, contemplating his next words. What they had just done was important, it was necessary. It solidified that they did have something more than just playful banter. Their bodies worked well together, he catered to her tonight, but she was more than a willing lover. They would be amazing, but they would have to wait. For right now, all they could have was this.
"Okay," he said, not really convincing himself or her. She accepted it, though, and began to get dressed.
He grabbed his boxers and walked her to the front door.
"Tomorrow?" she said.
"Bright and early," he said, trying for a light-hearted tone, but falling short.
He gave her a smile and a kiss on the cheek and said goodnight. But as she walked to the elevator, Kate realized she was now leaving with more questions than she came there with.