Hawkeye and BJ were in the swamp, drinking their homemade hooch. Frank stomped in.
"The nerve of her!,"
"Who?," said Hawkeye.
"Margret! She's two-timing me!"
"How do you know," asked BJ.
"I overheard her on the phone. While she's in Tokyo, she'll be with General Stevens!"
"Shocking!," said Hawkeye.
"How could she!"
"Seems to me, this is a case of the pot calling the kettle black," said BJ.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean your wife back home!"
"That's different!"
"How so?"
"I'm thousands of miles away from home. I need a little companionship."
"And how would you feel if your wife needed a little companionship, as well?," said Hawkeye.
"She'd better not!"
"Frank, listen to yourself!"
"Well. . . I'm a man! It's different for us men."
"That explains it all!," said BJ.
"By the way, how did you find this out?," said Hawkeye.
"I told you, I heard her on the phone."
"You were snooping."
"I wasn't snooping! I came into her tent to visit her. She was talking on the phone with him, so I snuck out."
"I see."
"I'll kill her, that's what I'll do!"
"No, Frank! There will be no bloodshed around here!," said BJ.
He and Hawkeye got up and walked over to Frank.
"I strongly urge you to forget about the whole thing, and forgive Margret," said Hawkeye.
"No!"
"Frank, how would you like it if we sent a letter to your wife telling her about your affairs, here?"
"You wouldn't!"
"In a minute!"
They glared at each other. Frank's anger subsided, and he sat on his cot. Hawkeye and BJ said back down.
A few seconds later, Margret herself came in. She had on her dress uniform.
"I'm leaving soon, Frank. I'll see you Sunday evening."
Hawkeye and BJ stared at Frank.
"Have a wonderful time, Major Houlihan!"
"Thank you! Oh, Frank?"
"Yes?"
"My feet are a little sore. Could you rub them for me, until the jeep comes?"
She slipped her right shoe off and wiggled her toes.
"Coming, Margret!"
She put her shoe back on, and they left together.
Hawkeye and BJ shook their heads and chuckled!