La Passione Per La Cioccolata

Milan isn't exactly the kind of place where an aspiring chocolate maker should be. Around here, we are mainly known for fashion. It's not that I don't like walking down the streets and seeing all those fancy clothes. Sure, I've seen that pair of Dolce & Gabbana sunglasses and thought about how fabulous I would look wearing them. And of course, I haven't walked down the street at one point in my life without seeing a beautiful Gucci dress in the window. But it's just not me. How would a fashion forward girl look fashion forward in the first place if she spends all her time in a chocolate store, getting spots all over her Prada shoes?

Ah yes. Fashion. With that comes a heavy price. Because even if you can afford that three hundred dollar sweater, it's going to go out of fashion in the next two weeks. That or it wont fit. Or it's uncomfortable. Really really uncomfortable.

So, I shy away from that fashion soaked world. When I do save my money it's for a nice cannoli from the bakery. And after a few years "the cannoli thing" has become a kind of routine. So come and visit me one time if your in town.

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One thousand. Two thousand. Three thousand. Oh really, how long was this going to take?

There came the sound of expensive shoes sliding across the marble floor and in came her boss.

"Carmela! Il tesoro abbiamo un'urgenza! Il Brigida corre tardi cosí ho bisogno di lei per prendere il dorso la su ragazza. E rapidamente! Lo spara gli inizi in... "

(bare with me, because some of the words may not have be translated properly. I'll just provide a translation here. "Carmela we have an emergency. Brigida is running late so I need you to get the other girl. And hurry! The shoot starts in..)

She checked her watch and gasped.

"Mezz'ora. Oh, le persone del Gucci non saranno felice se abbiamo l'annuncio fuori da tardi! Rapidamente Carmela! È vestito ed andare!"

(Half an hour! Oh the people at Gucci wont be happy if we get the ad in late. Quickly Carmela. Get your coat and go)

It figures Brigida is late. Probably passed out from drinking last night or is being help back by paparazzi as she cruises down the street in her black limo. Disgusting. Can't one famous model learn that we have to make deadlines here? My boss is clopping around in her five inch heels in a panic and if I can't get the other girl back here in the next twenty minutes, once again I'll be forced to survive another lecture from some frou-frou people. And for what? I didn't do anything! I would like to see Miss Drinks-martinis-every-day handle this job.

Just then a commotion was heard at the front glass doors. A constant sight of blinking flashbulbs and what looked like a huge black bear walking on two feet. Oh no wait. That's just Brigida wearing her fur coat. It's 104 in the sunshine! You don't need a fur coat woman!

"Tesoro di Carmela. Dunque piacevole per vederla ancora!"

(Carmela darling. So nice to see you again.)

Air kisses. God I hate those. They are what I call fake versions of emotion. Kind of like that fur coat.

"Brigida your late. And take off that coat please. Your in Milan not the Arctic Tundra."

"Desidero che Victoria non l'abbia inviata a New York l'anno scorso. Suo cosí..."

(I wish Victoria never sent you to New York City. Your so...)

Oh no, little Miss Barbie doll is giving me the your so inferior to me look. And what's with the fourteen year old Lindsay Lohan wannabee beside her? I thought she was keeping Maddie. If you don't know what I'm talking about then I'll tell you. Brigida has these,no owns, little girls who run around and do stuff for her. You know, dry cleaners, coffee...that kind of stuff. Because god forbid the woman breaks a nail.

"Americano"

(this one is self explanatory)

I may act like American but at least my breasts haven't been surgically enhanced four times. Oh do you hear that. That's the sound of my Victoria's Prada heels running across the floor.

"Oh Brigida. Suo qui. Siamo tutto pronto per lei. Questa maniera."

(Oh Brigida your here. The shoot is all set up. This way)

What no, you-had-the-whole-building-in-a-panic? Oh course not! This is Brigida Belvidere we are talking about. And to think I have to photograph her in the next five minutes.

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Ahhhhhh! Don't tell me the camera doesn't work again! I sit here in front of a beautiful backdrop of a beach somewhere. I close my eyes and imagine I'm there. All alone, swimming in the blue waters. No Victoria. No Gucci. And no Brigida.

"Il Carmela potrei parlarle?"

(Carmela may I speak with you?)

No you can't talk to me. Can't you see my camera is broken?

"Sure. What's the matter?"

"La settimana prossima è un defilé grande. Effettivamente, è chiamato la Palla di Cioccolata ed ogni fabbricante di dolciume assisterà a."

(As you know there will be a grand event taking place. Actually it's being called the Chocolate Ball and all the candy makers are coming)

"All of them?"

I try to keep my voice steady. Candy makers in Milan. This could be be my big chance. Go on Victoria, I'm listening with both ears this time.

"Loro tutti."

(All of them)

Victoria gave a tiny cough before resuming the conversation.

"Progettiamo una foto enorme spara per i loro prodotti nuovi che hanno fatto speciale per quest'avvenimento. Lei sa che che significa Carmela?"

(They have all made a new candy to promote the event. Do you know what that means Carmela?)

That I will be the first to photograph every candy maker and possibly get my own big break? It all tastes so delicious.

"I'll do it."

Victoria laughed.

"Il suo non andando a è il fotografo. No ho bisogno di lei per essere qui aiutare con la cena dopo."

(You think I would trust you with this. No I need you to help me with the buffet)

Dinner. Honey, I only do dessert. First the photographer and now this? What's next?

"Oh. Oh okay."

"I wish you would speak Italian more Carmela." Victoria said, surprising me with her English. True, it was heavily accented but it was still English. My big break lost and I have to photograph Brigida. How can it get any worse?

Because people asked, I have now provided a translation to the Italian