Heero Yuy's School of the Death Glareä
By: SayinShinigami
Disclamer: I do not own Gundam Wing…yet. But when I do, ye mere mortals shall bow before my power MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!
SS: Now, who do I want to tortur…uh…use in this demonstration? I'll need Heero…
Suddenly Heero Yuy appears in the nothingness
Heero: Where am I?
SS: I am SayinShinigami, and you are in my fanfiction.
Heero: Omae O Korosu, author.
He pulls his gun out of hammer space and shoots three bullets at me
I power up to a level 3 Super Sayin and my energy field melts the bullets
Heero: O.o'
SS: Now, as I was saying, I'll also need Duo, Trowa, Quatre, Wufei, Lady Une, and Relena.
The aforementioned people appear and look around in confusion
All (minus Heero): Where are we?
SS: I am SayinShinigami, and you are in my fanfiction.
All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Lady Une: Why is it solid black? Why are we floating? Why are we even here!?
SS: It is solid black because I haven't created the setting yet, you are floating because there is no ground, and you are here for my fanfiction, "Heero Yuy's School of the Death Glareä.
Relena: Start the fanfiction, this nothingness is making me sick…
Vomits up last weeks lunch
Relena: I still don't feel good…
SS: Ewww…OK! ON with the fanfiction!
We see a two story house set slightly back in the wood so as not to gain the attention of any normal anime characters (A.N. some of them are normal, right?) Here in this house we see Heero Yuy, famous pilot of Wing Zero, and perfect soldier to boot, glaring at a mirror. Suddenly, the mirror shatters, into dust. It is gone, a pile of sand on the floor. Then Heero turns to you the reader/viewer.
Heero: Greetings, I am Heero Yuy. My mission today (glares at the author) is to teach the pre-selected group of people to use my patented Death Glareä. You may be able to learn how to do this just from watching, but it is highly unlikely.
The door opens, and Duo storms in
Duo: I don't like this author, he calls himself Shinigami, But I AM SHINIGAMI! NO ONE BUT ME CAN BE THE GOD OF DEATH!
Suddenly I appear just behind Duo
SS: Actually…
Duo: AHHH! HOW"D YOU DO THAT! YOU ALMOST GAVE ME A HEART ATTACK!
SS: Huh? Oh, that. I used the Instant Transmission, Goku taught me. But anyways, I am SayinShinigami, so think of me as Vegeta (Oh! BTW I don't own DBZ) crossed with you, and some sanity thrown in just so I don't 1) act like you and 2) don't kill people on a whim.
Duo: Ohhh! Ok!
SS: Good, I gotta go, I can't write the story from inside it!
I disappear
Heero: Now Duo, you have to glare at this mirror until it shatters, understand.
Duo: Yeah, I guess.
Duo glares at the mirror, but nothing happens immediately…
Two days later
Duo (whiney voice): I can't do it! I'm outta here!
As he spins around to leave his braid hits the mirror, causing it to shatter
Duo: Woohoo! I did it!
Heero: -_-' Okay…Uh go sit on the "Couch of Graduates"
Duo: Um…
Heero: The author made me say it
Then the door opens and Trowa walks in
Trowa: …
Heero: I know, but he did break the mirror, so he qualifies as a graduate. But now you must break the mirror.
Trowa glares at the mirror, and exactly half of it shatters
Heero: O.o' How'd you do that!
Trowa: …
Heero: Oh, I see, your unibang got in the way, well technically you did shatter it, so go sit of the couch with Duo.
There is a somewhat soft, polite knock at the door
Using my powers as an omnipotent all-powerful author, I open the door
Quatre: Hello, I'm Quatre Rebaba Winner.
Heero: I know that
Quatre: But the readers might not.
Heero: But they're reading a "Gundam Wing" fanfiction, they know all about us.
Quatre: Everything?
Heero: Everything.
Quatre shudders at what some of the readers know about him.
Heero: You must glare at the mirror until it shatters.
Suddenly the door breaks down and forty men wearing red fezzes (A.N. Is that how it's spelled?)
Maquanauts (?): Master Quatre! It's too dangerous, allow us to do it for you!
Quatre: But…okay…
Under the pressure of forty death glares the mirror explodes in a fiery ball of death
Heero: Okay…Quatre go sit on the couch
SS: The rest of you, get out! I can't afford for all of you to be here!
The Maquanauts all leave
SS: Good, I borrowed this house, I didn't want them to destroy it!
I teleport out
Wufei barges in
Wufei: INJUSTICE! The author is weak! I refuse to be in this weak fanfiction.
I appear just behind him, fully powered up
SS: What did you say!
Wufei: Nothing! I didn't call your fanfiction weak!
SS: I thought so! Be warned, Wufei, I will hurt you in my next fanfiction!
Wufei: (pales so much he makes white bed sheets look black)
Heero: Wufei, glare at the mirror until it shatters.
Wufei: (grumble, grumble) fine…
He glares, but the mirror doesn't immediately shatter
Wufei: INJUSTICE!!
The mirror shatters
Heero: -_-' Riiiiiiiiiiiiight…go sit on the couch.
The door opens and four armed men run in
Random Soldier #1: Ma'am, the area is clear!
Lady Une walks in
Une: Okay. Clear out!
Random Soldier #2: Yes ma'am!
The four soldiers run out
Heero: You must break the glass.
Une: Okay.
She glares but nothing happens
Une: I can't do it.
I appear
SS: Do it for (whisper, whisper)
Une: Yes!
She puts on her glasses
The mirror explodes with a large mushroom cloud
Heero: What did you tell her?
SS: I told her to do it for "His Excellency", and then I gave her the glasses.
Heero: Oh…take off the glasses, and sit on the couch.
Une: okay
Heero: SS, who's last?
SS: You may no like this…it's Relena…
Heero: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
From out side: HEERO! I'm over here! Come and get me!
Heero: Shoot me! NOW!
SS: NO! You will finish this fanfic! Or I'll take away all of your guns, and the keys to Wing Zero for a month!
Heero: NO! Anything but that!
SS: Then teach Relena the Death Glareä!
Heero (pouting): Okay…
The door shatters under the immense power of Relena's incessant knocking
Relena: Heero! I found you (glomps him so hard he can't breath)
Heero: Relena…(gasp)…I…(choke)…need…
Relena: Yes Heero, what is it, my hand in marriage?
Heero:…no…(wheeze)…need…air…can't…breathe…
Relena: Oh! Sorry!
Heero: Okay…(cough)…you must shatter this mirror by glaring at it.
Relena: Okay! Anything for you!
Heero: Will you jump off a cliff?
Relena: No.
Heero & SS: Rats!
Relena stares at the mirror, but instead of the current mirror shattering, the old, broken mirrors are re-formed into a perfect state
Heero: O.o' How…how'd you do that!
Relena: Welllllllll…I can't do a Death Glareä, so I used my Glare of Lifeã
Heero: Well, since you failed to shatter the glass, I'll have to kill you.
Relena: Heero, you always threaten me. I know you don't mean it.
Heero: Actually, I do. Omae O Korosu.
Pulls out his gun and shoots her
All: Woohoo! She's dead!
Duo (in a sing song voice): Ding-Dong the Witch is Dead! Quatre, break out the champagne, it's party time!
***elsewhere***
Zechs: They have killed Rlena, but that's okay…
Walks into a room filled with blue tubes
Zechs:…we have more…MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
The camera pans to show an army of Relena clones in the tubes…
***THE END***
(or is it…?)
By: SayinShinigami
Disclamer: I do not own Gundam Wing…yet. But when I do, ye mere mortals shall bow before my power MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!
SS: Now, who do I want to tortur…uh…use in this demonstration? I'll need Heero…
Suddenly Heero Yuy appears in the nothingness
Heero: Where am I?
SS: I am SayinShinigami, and you are in my fanfiction.
Heero: Omae O Korosu, author.
He pulls his gun out of hammer space and shoots three bullets at me
I power up to a level 3 Super Sayin and my energy field melts the bullets
Heero: O.o'
SS: Now, as I was saying, I'll also need Duo, Trowa, Quatre, Wufei, Lady Une, and Relena.
The aforementioned people appear and look around in confusion
All (minus Heero): Where are we?
SS: I am SayinShinigami, and you are in my fanfiction.
All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Lady Une: Why is it solid black? Why are we floating? Why are we even here!?
SS: It is solid black because I haven't created the setting yet, you are floating because there is no ground, and you are here for my fanfiction, "Heero Yuy's School of the Death Glareä.
Relena: Start the fanfiction, this nothingness is making me sick…
Vomits up last weeks lunch
Relena: I still don't feel good…
SS: Ewww…OK! ON with the fanfiction!
We see a two story house set slightly back in the wood so as not to gain the attention of any normal anime characters (A.N. some of them are normal, right?) Here in this house we see Heero Yuy, famous pilot of Wing Zero, and perfect soldier to boot, glaring at a mirror. Suddenly, the mirror shatters, into dust. It is gone, a pile of sand on the floor. Then Heero turns to you the reader/viewer.
Heero: Greetings, I am Heero Yuy. My mission today (glares at the author) is to teach the pre-selected group of people to use my patented Death Glareä. You may be able to learn how to do this just from watching, but it is highly unlikely.
The door opens, and Duo storms in
Duo: I don't like this author, he calls himself Shinigami, But I AM SHINIGAMI! NO ONE BUT ME CAN BE THE GOD OF DEATH!
Suddenly I appear just behind Duo
SS: Actually…
Duo: AHHH! HOW"D YOU DO THAT! YOU ALMOST GAVE ME A HEART ATTACK!
SS: Huh? Oh, that. I used the Instant Transmission, Goku taught me. But anyways, I am SayinShinigami, so think of me as Vegeta (Oh! BTW I don't own DBZ) crossed with you, and some sanity thrown in just so I don't 1) act like you and 2) don't kill people on a whim.
Duo: Ohhh! Ok!
SS: Good, I gotta go, I can't write the story from inside it!
I disappear
Heero: Now Duo, you have to glare at this mirror until it shatters, understand.
Duo: Yeah, I guess.
Duo glares at the mirror, but nothing happens immediately…
Two days later
Duo (whiney voice): I can't do it! I'm outta here!
As he spins around to leave his braid hits the mirror, causing it to shatter
Duo: Woohoo! I did it!
Heero: -_-' Okay…Uh go sit on the "Couch of Graduates"
Duo: Um…
Heero: The author made me say it
Then the door opens and Trowa walks in
Trowa: …
Heero: I know, but he did break the mirror, so he qualifies as a graduate. But now you must break the mirror.
Trowa glares at the mirror, and exactly half of it shatters
Heero: O.o' How'd you do that!
Trowa: …
Heero: Oh, I see, your unibang got in the way, well technically you did shatter it, so go sit of the couch with Duo.
There is a somewhat soft, polite knock at the door
Using my powers as an omnipotent all-powerful author, I open the door
Quatre: Hello, I'm Quatre Rebaba Winner.
Heero: I know that
Quatre: But the readers might not.
Heero: But they're reading a "Gundam Wing" fanfiction, they know all about us.
Quatre: Everything?
Heero: Everything.
Quatre shudders at what some of the readers know about him.
Heero: You must glare at the mirror until it shatters.
Suddenly the door breaks down and forty men wearing red fezzes (A.N. Is that how it's spelled?)
Maquanauts (?): Master Quatre! It's too dangerous, allow us to do it for you!
Quatre: But…okay…
Under the pressure of forty death glares the mirror explodes in a fiery ball of death
Heero: Okay…Quatre go sit on the couch
SS: The rest of you, get out! I can't afford for all of you to be here!
The Maquanauts all leave
SS: Good, I borrowed this house, I didn't want them to destroy it!
I teleport out
Wufei barges in
Wufei: INJUSTICE! The author is weak! I refuse to be in this weak fanfiction.
I appear just behind him, fully powered up
SS: What did you say!
Wufei: Nothing! I didn't call your fanfiction weak!
SS: I thought so! Be warned, Wufei, I will hurt you in my next fanfiction!
Wufei: (pales so much he makes white bed sheets look black)
Heero: Wufei, glare at the mirror until it shatters.
Wufei: (grumble, grumble) fine…
He glares, but the mirror doesn't immediately shatter
Wufei: INJUSTICE!!
The mirror shatters
Heero: -_-' Riiiiiiiiiiiiight…go sit on the couch.
The door opens and four armed men run in
Random Soldier #1: Ma'am, the area is clear!
Lady Une walks in
Une: Okay. Clear out!
Random Soldier #2: Yes ma'am!
The four soldiers run out
Heero: You must break the glass.
Une: Okay.
She glares but nothing happens
Une: I can't do it.
I appear
SS: Do it for (whisper, whisper)
Une: Yes!
She puts on her glasses
The mirror explodes with a large mushroom cloud
Heero: What did you tell her?
SS: I told her to do it for "His Excellency", and then I gave her the glasses.
Heero: Oh…take off the glasses, and sit on the couch.
Une: okay
Heero: SS, who's last?
SS: You may no like this…it's Relena…
Heero: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
From out side: HEERO! I'm over here! Come and get me!
Heero: Shoot me! NOW!
SS: NO! You will finish this fanfic! Or I'll take away all of your guns, and the keys to Wing Zero for a month!
Heero: NO! Anything but that!
SS: Then teach Relena the Death Glareä!
Heero (pouting): Okay…
The door shatters under the immense power of Relena's incessant knocking
Relena: Heero! I found you (glomps him so hard he can't breath)
Heero: Relena…(gasp)…I…(choke)…need…
Relena: Yes Heero, what is it, my hand in marriage?
Heero:…no…(wheeze)…need…air…can't…breathe…
Relena: Oh! Sorry!
Heero: Okay…(cough)…you must shatter this mirror by glaring at it.
Relena: Okay! Anything for you!
Heero: Will you jump off a cliff?
Relena: No.
Heero & SS: Rats!
Relena stares at the mirror, but instead of the current mirror shattering, the old, broken mirrors are re-formed into a perfect state
Heero: O.o' How…how'd you do that!
Relena: Welllllllll…I can't do a Death Glareä, so I used my Glare of Lifeã
Heero: Well, since you failed to shatter the glass, I'll have to kill you.
Relena: Heero, you always threaten me. I know you don't mean it.
Heero: Actually, I do. Omae O Korosu.
Pulls out his gun and shoots her
All: Woohoo! She's dead!
Duo (in a sing song voice): Ding-Dong the Witch is Dead! Quatre, break out the champagne, it's party time!
***elsewhere***
Zechs: They have killed Rlena, but that's okay…
Walks into a room filled with blue tubes
Zechs:…we have more…MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
The camera pans to show an army of Relena clones in the tubes…
***THE END***
(or is it…?)