A/N: Hello pitied readers. This is a fake Loliver fic just to make my sister, who ships Olicitiy, mad. She is funny that way. I've only seen seven episodes of Arrow, so this whole thing is going to be OOC, out of date, and awful. So anyway, as I put on all of my Fanfictions, don't flame, I saved you the trouble at the bottom.

Oliver looked left.

Oliver looked right.

Everywhere he looked, Laurel was standing spotlight.

But Oliver was no lion king. And there was no way Laurel was going to forgive him for cheating on her with her sister AND killing aforementioned sister. Yet here he was, standing at her door with a bunch of flowers and small tub of ice cream (It was small because he thought Laurel was looking a little plush in comparison to his hunky physique). He knocked on the door, which was quite a fragile thing, and it splintered when his rock hard knuckles struck the wood. He quickly shoved his hand in his pocket and pulled out his personalized sheet of oversized scratch-and-sniff stickers. They were even in the shape of him. He put one of the stickers over the splintered wood and gave it a scratch… and a sniff…

"Aah" he relaxed into the familiar scent of BO, pine, and hunky muscles. That's right; he captured the smell of hunky muscles for a sticker. Laurel opened the door.

"Oliver? What are you doing hee—" she didn't get to finish as Oliver put a finger up to her lips.

"Shhh, I know, I know. You hate me because I am beautiful. I would hate me too." He flipped his hair. Which didn't really work because of the length. "But hear me out: I have no family—"

"You only lost your dad. You mom and sister are still—"

"Shhh, that's beside the point. Let me start over. I have no family, fortune, fame…" he paused for dramatic effect and willed a tear to come to his eye. He furrowed his brow and pursed his lips as he said, in a lower octave, "I've got nothing but my love for you, hun. I've got you babe."

"All of that is a lie, Oliver…"

"I got you to hold my hand

I got you to understand

I got you to walk with me

I got you to talk with me—"

"I am going to stop you right there. I'll take these flowers and ice cream though." She pushed him back and slammed the door in his face.

But Oliver was okay with that. Because he had Cher to keep him warm. He went off singing her tune…

"Then put your little hand in mine

There ain't no hill or mountain we can't climb…

I GOT YOU BABE…. I GOT YOU BABE"

A/N: Gur, this fanfic is so rachet. I am so embarrassed of it. Oh, and as promised, here is my flame.

"OMG. I cannot believe you are even allowed to wake up in the morning, much less type at a keyboard. Ur so dum I cant even."

Oh, and here is a fun joke:

What do white girls and prime numbers have in common?

They both "literally can't even".