Warnings:

I don't own any of the characters in this parody

Sorry if any of you are trans and I have the info. wrong

There is probably characters that hate each other so just don't read it.

Bruce woke up with a feeling of pain in his lower body. He got out of bed slowly with his hand in his belly trying to stop the pain. In 30 minutes he had a meeting with the Justice League. He hoped he could pass the meeting without having everyone knowing about his secret. He always thought about what would happen if they knew. Maybe the women would be less interested in him. He had meet people that discovered his secret. He certainly didn't wanted for people to know, and if Wally found out, the whole community of heroes would know. If they knew, they would talk and then the villains would know. They could discover his secret identity in no time. He couldn't risk any of that even if he wanted those days off. Another feeling of pain came through his body. He walked towards the bathroom. Closing the door behind him, he got the T, and waited to take painkillers. He took a shower and then he walked towards his studio. The boys were still asleep, it was 8 in the morning. Passing the door he went to the Batcave, and changed. The zeta tubes were a pain in the ass when he was like this, he wondered if other people were like that too. When he arrived in the cafeteria, everyone got silent, he passed through the cafeteria with his unusual emotionless expression.

A red light could be seen in his side. "Hey, bats, how are you?" Batman only greet him with a Batglare, so intense, that the speedster only frowned and ran.

"Hey, guys, it's one of those hell days" whispered Wally to Supergirl, Green Martian, and Green Arrow. "What's a hell day?" asked Green Arrow.

"Oh yeah you're new here, it's one of those days where Bats is more edgy and blooding" Green Arrow didn't took this well, after all, Bruce was his friend, he didn't understand how this people always wanted to change the Bat's personality. Always telling him to stop brooding, stop been edgy, stop being so stubborn.Seriously even when he told them to call him for important meetings, not socializing, he has so much in his plate.Give them the responsibilities of being the protector of Gotham, running Wayne enterprises, doing charity, being a father, (Which Oliver had asked Bruce if they knew the kids, but they didn't) try to do all of this as a human,they would be crying by now, instead of keep it, be strong and hold your head high to not show weaknesses."And what's wrong with brooding?" Flash look at him surprised as well as Supergirl, but Martian didn't show any emotion. "Well… he is so antisocial" Batman just doesn't like you, morons."I am antisocial, it's not like he has only you, their allies, you know, he has friends in other parts, lots, unlike you."

"Please Bats would never…" Arrow was furious now. "What? Never have friend with that attitude"

"That's not what I said" Now he just looked guilty. "No, no, it's ok, just because you are introverted and don't want to hang out, it means that you are an asshole" Now he was been sarcastic. "It's not like it's because you need to sleep, or you are stress out, or need to see your family, nope, it's because you are a complete asshole, you need to constantly keep with the shit of the people to not be categorized as antisocial" Flash was just quiet. Arrow left the table to go to the meeting.

Batman was on his way to the table when Diana looked at him intensely. What.was.her.problem? No seriously, she looked like she wanted to rip his head off. What the hell? After taking a seat he stood emotionless, and Wonder Woman sat in the other side of the table. Arrow entered, Superman, Marian, Green Lantern, Flash, Shayera, etc. "As all of you know we must talk about improving the cafeteria-"

"Seriously?" whispered Batman. "What?", said Superman. Batman mentally slapped himself for thinking out loud. He could have been in his bed sleeping, comfortable, even with his son, Dami, to be exact. He fought last night with Joker, he undoubtedly needed the help of his father, even if the kid was so hard. "Batman we need to address this issue"You know that was it."Didn't I said to call me if it was something important"

"Batman we have enough with your childish behavior" She had guts to do that. "Important means alien invasions, monitor duty, enemies, and improving technological stuff in the watchtower, not social places that not even need improvement" He was tired, his belly hurt, and this woman was going be the death of him. "Just because you don't use the cafeteria or any social place, because of your personality, doesn't mean that you don't have to participate, we are a team."A team, yeah sure, a team understands each other, I'm not even part of it.

"I am-"

"A partial member we know"Always with the same thing over and over, oh for Hera, couldn't this man just shut up and do like the others did?

"For the last TIME, a partial member ONLY for Important things, if you haven't noticed"I don't care, this is important, a meeting, I am tired of this man making excuses.

"We are all the same, why can't you stick alone-"He is not special or anything, we all have responsibilities, like me been an ambassador, I must go to a meeting each month, and help people through the world in the Justice League, he only needs to protect Gotham city like any other hero, Gotham isn't special, villains vs heroes, and here I am.

"We are not the same, all-".What makes him special, not having superpowers? Then he should've never work with Metas and aliens of class A. We will not have pity over a small man stubborn, mysterious, and antisocial like him.

"Or is it just because you're a human" All the room froze. Superman looked like he wanted to say something but he couldn't. Wally wanted to leave by now. Martian was prepared to sense all of the anger in Batman's mind, but he only felt, confusion, he had his barriers down.WTF? Is this woman serious? She reminds me of the bullies of the school, mean girls, such a priceless moment. Martian then sensed laugh, he began to worry about Batman. "All of us are different because we have different responsibilities, there is a reason why I choose to be a part member" Wonder Woman seem furious now, how dare this man speak to her, an Amazonian like that. Batman was just emotionless like always. "Only protecting Gotham city and do work like others-"

"You know been the protector of Gotham, running Wayne enterprises, doing charity, fighting real insane people, that are not brainless like you, going to the doctor, acting, having all of your bones broken fighting, and it's not because you don't want help, no, it's because people are so stupid to work in Gotham because one wrong step, and there is buildings blowing everywhere, looking at torn and decomposed bodies everywhere you go, having that chance of seeing a friend or family there, almost having the chance of been killed, people suffering… you get tired you know, and after fighting a villain but be at their mercy because there is 3 hospitals that have bombs that are going to be blown up if they don't see the boss, he takes opportunity and breaks 3 of your ribs, shoots you 4 times, which none of you have ever felt, I'm not so sure about Wally. The following morning you must be dying to sleep the rest of the day but you can't because someone has to repair the stupid cafeteria, just because someone said the food is always cold." Green Arrow said.

Everyone stunned in silence. All of them looked ashamed and guilt. "Then you should quit the league" Wonder Woman said. "Wonder Woman that's enough" said the Boyscout. "Wonde-"

"Everyone with a cell of brain would quit this job, hell even blow it, but you can't because it's a responsibility to keep the world safe since you know it won't last 3 weeks alive without you"

"That's not true-". Please we are Metas of class A, what will a small man make a difference?

Please I own the watchtower, I give them my money and this is how they pay, more childish than my children.

"Oh well then, Batman is out for 3 weeks to test that theory"Ok, no, it's just a fight but I need to break it down, as always. I just want to sleep the pain is killing meeeeee.

"No, no, no, seriously that's not necessary-".Green Arrow turned to Batman and said. "Because you know that it's true. Who solves everything at the end?" Bruce knows this is true. Ahhh I know but it's just taking more of our time. Arrow turn to Wonder Woman. "And who makes mistakes, only for Batman to babysit them?" Wonder Woman was about to fight someone, Superman got up slowly, as well as Batman, Wally just was turning slow to the door. "And, what person makes everyone to back off an argument just because of ANGRY ISSUES and wants to solve everything with VIOLENCE. That's call overpower in case you didn't know" Wally got the hit, and said "That's true" Everyone looked at Wally astonished, even Batman who rarely showed any emotion. "I fought yesterday, with my nemesis, I know I'm not bullet proof, but I'm still here because of justice, he broke my bone, and I was hoping rest my bone a little before I got to work, but someone made a meeting about the cafeteria" He split the last part as if it were a disease.

"Well then if this is such a hard job for everyone, then explain this Batman." Wonder Woman uploaded images of a kid fighting crime. It was Robin.

Oh dear Lord…