~This is a story from Obi-Wan's point of view. Time frame: Between TPM and
AOTC. Anakin has contracted an extremely rare disease. NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO
KILL ME FOR THIS! I'm in a morbid mood right now. Hopefully Italics are
memories, but every time you see a * then it's the beginning or end of a
memory. ~
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Ba-dump.Ba-dump.Ba-dump.
Blip.Blip.Blip.
My heart pounded so loudly in my chest that I worried it would wake the small frail form that lay still on the bed in front of me. The child had contracted a rare disease that healers nicknamed K2: Killer #2. The disease was slow, and one could not see the symptoms until it was too late.
My Padawan, Anakin Skywalker, was the child on the medical bay cot. Skin that was once warm and slightly browned was now paler than snow, and eyes that were once a clear blue were now a grey misty color. He could barely move, and what little movement he made took a lot of his energy. Tubes and needles, wires and bandages stuck out along his body that had once been lean and fit, now all-too-thin and willowy.
I never expected it to be like this. When I took him on as an apprentice, I was fulfilling the wishes of a dying man: my master Qui-Gon Jinn. I held myself back from the boy, not wanting to get attached to him too much. If I got emotionally attached, it would hurt if and when something bad happened. But I failed. I let myself love Anakin. He was so innocent when I met him, and all he wanted was to be loved. I provided him with that love over the years, and he turned into a wonderful apprentice, talented in both the Force and with a lightsaber.
Then, one day, he had started complaining of a pain in his back. I told him it was nothing and provided temporary relief. As the days went on, he started slowing down and tiring more than usual. He fell behind on his studies, going down to the medical ward for aspirins during his classes. Finally, he couldn't even support himself anymore. Bant admitted him into the medical ward, keeping him on careful observation. They took X-rays of his body, then of his back, where they discovered the K2 beginning to grow on his spine.
The day Bant told me, I was in shock. I couldn't believe it. K2. My Padawan had K2. Bant kept talking about things they could do to save him, and the consequences, but I wasn't listening.
My entire world came crashing down around me. I had learned about K2 in school, of course. It was a bio-weapon that could wipe out an entire planet, and no one would find it till it was too late. The fact that it had infected my Padawan terrified me.
* "There has to be something you can do!"
Bant shook her head sadly. "Obi-Wan, did you not just hear what I said?"
"I was kind of preoccupied with the fact that my apprentice is DYING!" What was I thinking? Bant was my best friend and now I'm yelling at her. All she did was tell me what she was supposed to tell me.
Tears formed in her large silver eyes.
"Well, I'm sorry Obi-Wan. I'm worried about Anakin too but you need to CALM DOWN!" The Mon Calamarian whirled and ran back to the main medical bay. The door shut behind her.
I sat down hard, elbows resting on my knees and hands in my face. 'What have I done?'*
Anakin was admitted full time to the infirmary, which leads us to this point in time.
Bant is still angry with me, and I can't find her to apologize. I grasped the bony hand in front of me. How could I let this happen?
"Obi-Wan." I turned. Bant stood in the doorway. "There is something we can do. But it will mean that Anakin's spinal cord will be out of commission." Her usually warm voice was cold as she spoke.
"Bant, I-"
"Stop. I know this means a lot to you, and so does he. Apparently he means more to you than the rest of your friends." She turned and left. I sighed, then turned back to my apprentice.
I thought about the procedure. Having Anakin alive and crippled was better than having him die, right?
--------------------
"His fever is still rising. We need to get more medicine in him." I watched silently as Tahl grabbed a syringe, filled with a strange looking blue liquid, took Anakin's limp arm gently and slid the needle slowly into his vein.
It had been a week since my fight with Bant. I hadn't left Anakin's side, eaten, or slept since then. My eyes were sunken and hollow, according to Tahl, who had come in to watch Anakin with me. I was wasting away, she said, becoming nothing more than air. Empty, hallow, unfeeling. I don't know why, but I completely agreed with her.
I was empty, hallow, and unfeeling. Where my heart used to be, where what was left of my heart was anyway, was vacant. I knew Anakin was going to die, and I could do nothing to stop it.
I felt guilt spread over me like a blanket. Only this blanket made me feel cold and alone inside, instead of warm and loved. I was losing the only other person I loved in this world to a disease that couldn't be cured.
No. That wasn't true. Bant. I still had Bant. No. Bant was still angry with me, thinking that I didn't love her like I did my apprentice. But I did. With all my empty heart I did. But I was afraid. Afraid to lose another that I loved. I had to talk to her.
"Bant." My voice was rasping after not drinking anything for several days.
"Bant is in looking after a patient, Obi-Wan." A mug of some sort of sweet- smelling brown liquid was thrust under my nose. I looked up at Tahl. She smiled warmly at me. "Drink this. It'll make you feel better. Honest."
"Thanks." I rasped again, and then drank the glass down. I felt warmth spreading through my body, warming me down to my toes.
"It's Bant's special tonic. It's mainly used for headaches and colds, but you looked like you could use some." Tahl frowned down at me. "I don't like the way you look, Obi-Wan. You're too thin. You need to eat something."
Before I could protest that I didn't want anything, Tahl swept out of the room. I sighed and sat back in my chair, beginning to watch Anakin's still form again. His heart rate had slowed, ever so slightly.
* "There is something we can do. But it will mean that Anakin's spinal cord will be out of commission." *
Bant's words flashed through my head again. Out of commission. Anakin would be crippled. Unable to walk, move, or play again. Would that be so terrible?
I glanced back at the small child on the bed. He was always so bright, cheerful, and nothing ever seemed to get him down. Now he was reduced to this frail form that couldn't even smile.
I stood and moved over to the bed, dragging my chair behind me. I didn't have the strength to carry it. I sat by the bedside, eyes never leaving Anakin's face. I took his small hand in mine and held it, desperately trying to bring some warmth back into it.
"Anakin," I whispered. "I'm so sorry. I never meant for this to happen. But it'll all be over soon. I'm going to have them perform the operation."
One misty grey eye opened a crack, peering at me. Anakin coughed quietly. "W-ha-t is the o-per-a-tion?" he murmured, closing his eye again.
I looked at him, startled. It was the first time he had spoken since he had slipped into unconsciousness.
"They are going to take the disease off of your spine. You'll survive this, Anakin. I know you will."
He coughed again, this time, more violently. "W-ha-t are t-he si-de-aff- ects?" The child must have heard Tahl and I talking about it.
"You might not be able to walk afterwards. It would cripple you."
"I d-on-t want -t-o be cr-ipp-led." I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
"Wouldn't you rather be alive and crippled than dead, Anakin?"
"N-o." Then he slipped back into unconsciousness. His heart skipped a beat, then resumed it normal "blip..blip..blip" sound.
I sat back in my chair, thinking. I never really considered that Anakin might not want to be alive and not able to do anything. I guess if I was him, I would rather die that live and not be able to do anything. I sighed and slumped down further in my chair.
Suddenly, the steady "blip" of the heart monitor stopped, flat-lining. I stood and ran to the door.
"BANT! HIS HEART STOPPED!" I screamed. 'Force no, oh Force. Please, no, not now! He's too young to die!'
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CLIFFIE!!!!!!!!!!! W00t!!!! I am evil!!! EEEEEEEEVIL!!!!!!!! **heart** Lemme know what you think, okay? ^_^
--------------------
Ba-dump.Ba-dump.Ba-dump.
Blip.Blip.Blip.
My heart pounded so loudly in my chest that I worried it would wake the small frail form that lay still on the bed in front of me. The child had contracted a rare disease that healers nicknamed K2: Killer #2. The disease was slow, and one could not see the symptoms until it was too late.
My Padawan, Anakin Skywalker, was the child on the medical bay cot. Skin that was once warm and slightly browned was now paler than snow, and eyes that were once a clear blue were now a grey misty color. He could barely move, and what little movement he made took a lot of his energy. Tubes and needles, wires and bandages stuck out along his body that had once been lean and fit, now all-too-thin and willowy.
I never expected it to be like this. When I took him on as an apprentice, I was fulfilling the wishes of a dying man: my master Qui-Gon Jinn. I held myself back from the boy, not wanting to get attached to him too much. If I got emotionally attached, it would hurt if and when something bad happened. But I failed. I let myself love Anakin. He was so innocent when I met him, and all he wanted was to be loved. I provided him with that love over the years, and he turned into a wonderful apprentice, talented in both the Force and with a lightsaber.
Then, one day, he had started complaining of a pain in his back. I told him it was nothing and provided temporary relief. As the days went on, he started slowing down and tiring more than usual. He fell behind on his studies, going down to the medical ward for aspirins during his classes. Finally, he couldn't even support himself anymore. Bant admitted him into the medical ward, keeping him on careful observation. They took X-rays of his body, then of his back, where they discovered the K2 beginning to grow on his spine.
The day Bant told me, I was in shock. I couldn't believe it. K2. My Padawan had K2. Bant kept talking about things they could do to save him, and the consequences, but I wasn't listening.
My entire world came crashing down around me. I had learned about K2 in school, of course. It was a bio-weapon that could wipe out an entire planet, and no one would find it till it was too late. The fact that it had infected my Padawan terrified me.
* "There has to be something you can do!"
Bant shook her head sadly. "Obi-Wan, did you not just hear what I said?"
"I was kind of preoccupied with the fact that my apprentice is DYING!" What was I thinking? Bant was my best friend and now I'm yelling at her. All she did was tell me what she was supposed to tell me.
Tears formed in her large silver eyes.
"Well, I'm sorry Obi-Wan. I'm worried about Anakin too but you need to CALM DOWN!" The Mon Calamarian whirled and ran back to the main medical bay. The door shut behind her.
I sat down hard, elbows resting on my knees and hands in my face. 'What have I done?'*
Anakin was admitted full time to the infirmary, which leads us to this point in time.
Bant is still angry with me, and I can't find her to apologize. I grasped the bony hand in front of me. How could I let this happen?
"Obi-Wan." I turned. Bant stood in the doorway. "There is something we can do. But it will mean that Anakin's spinal cord will be out of commission." Her usually warm voice was cold as she spoke.
"Bant, I-"
"Stop. I know this means a lot to you, and so does he. Apparently he means more to you than the rest of your friends." She turned and left. I sighed, then turned back to my apprentice.
I thought about the procedure. Having Anakin alive and crippled was better than having him die, right?
--------------------
"His fever is still rising. We need to get more medicine in him." I watched silently as Tahl grabbed a syringe, filled with a strange looking blue liquid, took Anakin's limp arm gently and slid the needle slowly into his vein.
It had been a week since my fight with Bant. I hadn't left Anakin's side, eaten, or slept since then. My eyes were sunken and hollow, according to Tahl, who had come in to watch Anakin with me. I was wasting away, she said, becoming nothing more than air. Empty, hallow, unfeeling. I don't know why, but I completely agreed with her.
I was empty, hallow, and unfeeling. Where my heart used to be, where what was left of my heart was anyway, was vacant. I knew Anakin was going to die, and I could do nothing to stop it.
I felt guilt spread over me like a blanket. Only this blanket made me feel cold and alone inside, instead of warm and loved. I was losing the only other person I loved in this world to a disease that couldn't be cured.
No. That wasn't true. Bant. I still had Bant. No. Bant was still angry with me, thinking that I didn't love her like I did my apprentice. But I did. With all my empty heart I did. But I was afraid. Afraid to lose another that I loved. I had to talk to her.
"Bant." My voice was rasping after not drinking anything for several days.
"Bant is in looking after a patient, Obi-Wan." A mug of some sort of sweet- smelling brown liquid was thrust under my nose. I looked up at Tahl. She smiled warmly at me. "Drink this. It'll make you feel better. Honest."
"Thanks." I rasped again, and then drank the glass down. I felt warmth spreading through my body, warming me down to my toes.
"It's Bant's special tonic. It's mainly used for headaches and colds, but you looked like you could use some." Tahl frowned down at me. "I don't like the way you look, Obi-Wan. You're too thin. You need to eat something."
Before I could protest that I didn't want anything, Tahl swept out of the room. I sighed and sat back in my chair, beginning to watch Anakin's still form again. His heart rate had slowed, ever so slightly.
* "There is something we can do. But it will mean that Anakin's spinal cord will be out of commission." *
Bant's words flashed through my head again. Out of commission. Anakin would be crippled. Unable to walk, move, or play again. Would that be so terrible?
I glanced back at the small child on the bed. He was always so bright, cheerful, and nothing ever seemed to get him down. Now he was reduced to this frail form that couldn't even smile.
I stood and moved over to the bed, dragging my chair behind me. I didn't have the strength to carry it. I sat by the bedside, eyes never leaving Anakin's face. I took his small hand in mine and held it, desperately trying to bring some warmth back into it.
"Anakin," I whispered. "I'm so sorry. I never meant for this to happen. But it'll all be over soon. I'm going to have them perform the operation."
One misty grey eye opened a crack, peering at me. Anakin coughed quietly. "W-ha-t is the o-per-a-tion?" he murmured, closing his eye again.
I looked at him, startled. It was the first time he had spoken since he had slipped into unconsciousness.
"They are going to take the disease off of your spine. You'll survive this, Anakin. I know you will."
He coughed again, this time, more violently. "W-ha-t are t-he si-de-aff- ects?" The child must have heard Tahl and I talking about it.
"You might not be able to walk afterwards. It would cripple you."
"I d-on-t want -t-o be cr-ipp-led." I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
"Wouldn't you rather be alive and crippled than dead, Anakin?"
"N-o." Then he slipped back into unconsciousness. His heart skipped a beat, then resumed it normal "blip..blip..blip" sound.
I sat back in my chair, thinking. I never really considered that Anakin might not want to be alive and not able to do anything. I guess if I was him, I would rather die that live and not be able to do anything. I sighed and slumped down further in my chair.
Suddenly, the steady "blip" of the heart monitor stopped, flat-lining. I stood and ran to the door.
"BANT! HIS HEART STOPPED!" I screamed. 'Force no, oh Force. Please, no, not now! He's too young to die!'
--------------------
CLIFFIE!!!!!!!!!!! W00t!!!! I am evil!!! EEEEEEEEVIL!!!!!!!! **heart** Lemme know what you think, okay? ^_^