Oh dear. I'm at it again. xD inspired by a songfic for "Whiskey Lullaby" by Brad Paisley, I wanted to pick a beautiful and touching song to write a twins fic for. My first songfic, so I'm not quite sure how they work but I hope this is okay :s The song is "I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing" by Aerosmith, one of my favorite ballads of all time. Written in Hikaru's point of view.
I don't own Ouran or the song!
I could stay awake, just to hear you breathing. Watch you smile while you are sleeping, while you're far away and dreaming. I could spend my life in this sweet surrender, I could stay lost in this moment forever. Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure.
You don't know. You can't know that every night I awaken, as if called upon by some unseen force secured away in the deep recesses of my mind. Eyes open, golden irises sweeping the room, trying to find something else to hold my attention so that I don't have to see your shadowy form lying next to me. The room is always dark; I turn on the dim light next to the bed. Our bed. Eyes close again because I don't want to see you, yet I crave nothing more than to burn your image into my eyes; to take a picture with my mind and store it away along with every other memory we share together. Unbidden, my lids slide apart of their own accord and I wince in the sudden light; but that doesn't matter.
Lying close to you, feeling your heart beating. And I'm wondering what you're dreaming, wondering if it's me you're seeing. Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together; I just wanna stay with you in this moment forever, forever and ever.
There you lie, right next to me as you have our entire eighteen years of life. My hands move to your still figure, fingertips only centimeters from your silken skin as I long to touch you. Feel you. Ensure that you aren't a cruel yet beautiful figment projected from my brain. Finally my palm rests on your bare shoulder and you shiver under my caress. This elicits my tongue to swipe across my lips, wetting them in anticipation for what I am about to do. Like the brush of a butterfly's wing my lips replace my hand on your smooth shoulder, moving slowly towards your neck. With a sigh your mouth twitches up at the sides in a tiny but perfect smile, and I feel my cheeks stretch with my returning grin. I press the lightest of kisses on your neck, and pause to take the time to breath in your sweet scent. Just as a child's heart does on Christmas, my own gives it's own leap when you turn to me with eyes flickering behind closed lids. I can only begin to imagine what you're seeing in your personal dreamworld, wishing I could be there with you. Before I can contain myself, I lean forward and gingerly press my greedy lips to those dancing lids in a futile attempt to force my way into your dreams. With a finger I begin at your forehead, tracing my way to your curved nose; your high cheeks bones, the skin pulled taught but not overly so; over your cherry lips which I dare not taste. You shift and mutter something lost to my ears, but that is warning enough to tell me that this is the end of my secret time with you tonight.
I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall asleep; cause I'd miss you babe and I don't wanna miss a thing. Cause even when I dream of you, the sweetest dream would never do. I'd still miss you babe, and I don't wanna miss a thing.
The light is shut off, plunging the room once again in darkness as black as my withheld feelings. I roll onto my side with my back to you, our bodies forming a perfectly symmetrical shape on the bed. The worst part of the night. Light sobs unable to be suppressed and forcing their way up my throat in a battle to be the first to emit from my open mouth. How long have I had this twisted and sickening ritual? I can't remember how or when it began, but it feels like it has been going on since the day we were conceived; I before you, but you following soon after. Inseparable since that moment, like two leaves of the same flower that's waiting to blossom. However, what future will the blossom bring? Is there a single bud that will bloom, or has a second snuck up to place itself next to the first? I wish so desperately for a single bloom, two souls contained within it that have grown together through the years. A foolish desire, an unattainable goal. Similar to the tears soaking into my pillow his world expands and grows, leaving dark patches in his wake. Which is where I stand. Though he may think I am slow to realize my feelings for others, he would be surprised to hear that his theory is dead wrong. In fact it is the utter opposite. I have finally discovered my feelings, though they are not what he intended. He would be horrified to hear them. Disgusted. He would think I was filthy. This is what my mind tells me. It shuns any idea of reciprocated love.
My heart is another matter. It screams for me to confess, to pour my feelings out for all to see. The ongoing war between the two tears me apart, and I struggle to decide which I should follow. I need a break, a sign, anything to help in my internal battle.
What I did not intend is for said flag to come this night. It was so like the other nights, nearly as identical as my secret love is to myself. The sign comes in the form of a sigh, and a name. My name. Nearly inaudible but to those who listen. Along with the name are arms, reaching to me and encircling me in a warm embrace. Held by the one I love, my tears finally dry and my heart ultimately wins out. How could I say no when his arms are around me, holding me and protecting me from all else? His face, a mirror image of my own, buries itself in my neck and I smile with confidence. Yes, this is the perfect moment. I stay awake for as long as I can, wanting to make the night last forever because as soon as I close my eyes...I'll already miss time better spent with the one I love. "Kaoru..."
I should stop writing useless fics and go to bed every now and then xD
Please review!