Author's note: Hello there! Goodness, but it's been an awfully long time since I've used this site. Here is the first real fanfic I had written in approximately 3 years (at the time it was completed)! I had an absolute blast while writing this. Pines family bonding gives me life!
Now, I realize that Christmas and winter are two things you'd probably like to keep out of your thoughts in April. My apologies for that; I originally posted this to my Tumblr in early January, just a few days after New Year's Day, and wanted to make sure I ported it to my account before the thought of doing so escaped me...xD
What I didn't realize until I was nearly finished writing this was that Stan and Ford would most likely have been out at sea during the winter of 2012, but this was supposed to have taken place during that time period. Oh, well. I suppose that you can either consider this complete non-canon fun or an event that takes place during Christmas of 2013. xP
Despite this being posted here several months later than it should have been, I hope you enjoy! I'd love to hear your thoughts, so please feel free to rate and review this story if you'd like to, and don't be afraid to offer criticism! There is always room for improvement, after all. If you do happen to have come across this at the proper time of the year, I wish you a merry Christmas and/or a happy holiday of your choosing! c:
- Danni
"Grunkle Stan, Grunkle Ford, come on!"
Stan and Ford laughed. "Alright, alright, we're on our way!" Ford called out. He ran out after the kids, trying to pull his six-fingered gloves on as he went. "Not so fast, now!"
"You goofball kids're gonna kill us," Stan teased as he locked the house up. "Just leave us old men in the dust; don't mind us!"
Dipper and Mabel were already about thirty feet ahead of their two great-uncles, eager to jump right into the winter wonderland all around them. It was the Saturday before Christmas, and a huge snowstorm had hit Gravity Falls the night before, blanketing it in soft, pure-white snow. Being native to California, the kid twins hadn't really seen much snow, and their winter-in-summer experience earlier that year was too packed with paranormal insanity for it to be much of a carefree snow day.
The second the twins were far enough from the Shack, Mabel dropped the sled she'd been dragging with her and let herself fall backwards into a pile of fluff. "Ohhhhh my gosh, this is amazing!" she cried happily. "It's like swimming in an ocean made of clouds!"
Dipper sat down on a fallen tree beside her. "I know, right?! Hard to believe frozen rain could make something so...well, for lack of a better word, cool." He looked down at Mabel and snickered at what he saw. She'd practically been swallowed by the snowbank she'd fallen into, and it was quite a comical sight. "Having fun there? Trying to become a human marshmallow?" he snarked lightheartedly.
"You know it!" Mabel cheered. Then, she started giggling. "Maybe you should...chill out and check it out for yourself!"
"Wait, what're you- AAH!" Dipper barely had time to react before Mabel grabbed his arms and dragged him into the massive snowbank with her. Rather than get angry with her, though, he just started laughing, as did she.
Stan and Ford finally caught up with the kids - just in time to see Dipper threatening to stuff snow down Mabel's coat. They couldn't help but start laughing themselves. "What are you knuckleheads doin'?" Stan asked.
"Getting even!" Dipper said with a grin, though he had already dropped the handful of snow he had.
"NEVER!" Mabel cried from behind her sled shield.
Ford tried his best to keep his composure. "Didn't take long for you two to get used to the cold, huh?" he said, laughing all the while. He then knelt down beside them. "So...what do you think of this? Isn't it remarkable?"
"Honestly? Christmas movies don't do it justice," Dipper quickly replied.
"Right? California, you need to up your game," Mabel agreed. "This is what a real winter looks like!"
Stan chuckled. "Jeez, Sixer, maybe this was a mistake. I don't think the kids care for it!" he joked. He straightened up, hands on his hips. "So...we finally caught up with ya speedin' bullets. Whaddya think we should do now?"
Dipper and Mabel looked at each other and grinned, as if each knew exactly what the other was thinking. When they turned back around to face the grunkles, Dipper said, "I think you're gonna have to catch us again."
"What?" replied the Stan twins in confusion.
In an instant, the little twins boarded Mabel's toboggan and beckoned for their great-uncles to board the other. The challenge had been set. It was up to Stanley and Stanford Pines to accept their mission.
"You've gotta be kiddin' me..." Stan said, trying to act mad, but laughing anyway. "Alright. If it's a race they want, it's gonna be a race they're never gonna forget!" He quickly hopped onto the front of the sled and motioned for Ford to get behind him. "Hop on, brother."
"Ohhh, no. Last time I ever let you lead the way, we both spent half of President's Day weekend cleaning up Mrs. Sebastianelli's front lawn," Ford responded, fondly remembering that weekend, as monotonous as that had been.
"Aw, c'mon! We were eleven then! And we did 'er a favor, in my opinion. How many garden gnomes does one lady need?" Stan said, trying to justify his terrible steering. "We can both drive now. What's the worst that could happen?"
Ford just shook his head and tried to keep from laughing out loud as he boarded the sled. "I have a feeling I'm going to live to regret this..."
"Alright, grunkles!" Mabel cheered. She and Dipper braced themselves. "On the count of three!"
The whole family joined in. "One...two...three!"
Trees and homes raced by at rocket speed. Soon, Dipper and Mabel's toboggan came to a stop, and they were able to catch their breath for just a moment.
"Holy...cheese balls..." was the only thing Mabel could bring herself to say.
"I don't know about you...but I...am so doing that again," Dipper said, and the twins highfived each other. Then, Dipper realized something. "Um...where are-"
There was a commotion at the bottom of the next hill. Then came the strangest sounding crash Dipper and Mabel had ever heard.
Quickly, they left the sled behind and ran down after Stan and Ford. When they spotted the grunkles, they were buried in snow beneath a massive pine tree.
"Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Ford! Are you guys okay?" Mabel said, a little worried.
"Don't worry, pumpkin. Everything's-" More snow fell from the pine needles above...right onto Stan's face. "Fine."
Ford didn't say anything at first. He was too busy spitting out pine needles. Then, the two brothers looked at each other and burst out laughing. The kids sighed with relief before joining in.
"That...was more fun than racing the rulers of Kartylon 7," Ford finally managed to say. "I say a rematch is in order! Only this time..." He shot Stan a face that screamed, 'I will never let this go as long as we both live'. "I am definitely driving."
The day was filled to the brim with fun, and yet it seemed to fly by in an instant. The Pines family spent hours racing each other and still found the time to build a family of snow-folk in their image - including a tiny snow-pig. It wasn't until the grunkles noticed the kids beginning to shiver that Ford remembered to check his watch.
"How on Earth is it this late already?" Ford remarked. "Alright, kids, come along...we'd better get you two home before you freeze."
"Aw, man..." said the twins in unison. As cold as they were, they hated for such fun to come to an end.
"C'mon, kiddos. No way're we lettin' you kids get pneumonia or somethin'," Stan said. "Besides, who says we can't have fun on th'way back home?"
That gave Ford an idea. As Stan picked Mabel up and mounted her on his shoulders, Ford whispered something to her, making sure to stay clear of Stan's bad ear so he couldn't catch onto their plan. Mabel giggled to herself, but kept it secret. With that, Ford took hold of the kids' sleds, and the little family made its way back home.
The clouds had begun to clear, and the beginning of a cotton-candy sunset was starting to tint the mounds of white glitter pale pink. All was serene for a short while as the family admired their surroundings. The only sound was the quiet crunching of the snow beneath their feet.
All of a sudden, a fit of giggling broke the silence. "Oh, Grunkle Staaa-aaan..."
Stan glanced up. What he saw was Mabel with her tongue sticking out and a mischievous twinkle in her eye. She was dangling a little ball of glittering white fluff directly above his face, playfully threatening to drop it at any moment.
Stan had to chuckle at that. "If you drop that on me, I'm takin' ya up t'Mount Hood and leavin' ya there," he said, his threat not sounding the least bit serious.
Ford and Dipper both cracked up. "How did you even manage to make a snowball from all the way up there?" Dipper asked.
"My secret weapon!" Mabel announced proudly. She scooped mounds of snow off of nearby tree branches to demonstrate.
"Nuh-uh. Don't you dare! There will be heck t'pay!" Stan said.
Mabel feigned defeat. "Okay..."
The silence returned for a minute. Then...
Plop.
"Oh, that's it!"
Stan dropped Mabel down in the snow and immediately began working on a giant snowball as she tried to escape. He was hardly able to pick his ammo up below he received another blow to the head. When he spun around, there was Ford, grinning at him with childish glee, and Dipper wasn't too close behind.
"And that, dear brother, is what you get for ramming me into a tree."
"You...little..." Stan wiped the snow off the back of his head, dumbfounded. "Y'put 'em up to this, didn't ya?"
"What can I say?" Dipper shrugged. "Couldn't pass up the opportunity to get you back for a summer full of noogies." He, too, flashed Stan an impish grin.
It was then that the all-out war began.
The four of them chased each other all the way back up the hill to the Christmas-light-coated back porch of the Mystery Shack. Snowballs weren't the only thing that flew. Hats and earmuffs of various colors and sizes flew, too, as they were knocked off by the shots being fired. Excellent hits were had by all, but Dipper surprised everyone, for several snowballs he fired showed that he had potential to be quite the skilled marksman with more practice. By the time the Pines family reached the backyard, everyone was exhausted, and a silent truce was called, but Stan wasn't done with anybody just yet.
"Oh - look out! We're in a snowglobe and somebody's about to shake it!" he cried out, playfully tackling the kids to the ground. Ford attempted to sneak away, but Stan was having none of that. "Ohhh, no, don't think you're gettin' out of this, Poindexter; you started this!" Stan quickly dragged him into the mess, and the whole family collapsed into a happy pile of giggles.
It wasn't long before everyone was inside, dressed in dry clothing, and seated down in front of the fireplace with blankets, pizza, and big mugs of hot chocolate.
"Y'think Soos'n'his grandma are gettin' in on this, too, up at his cousin's place?" Stan inquired. "Christmas, or whatever have ya, isn't the same if it isn't white."
"Oh, definitely. The northernmost part of the state is getting hammered," Ford replied with a chuckle.
Stan laughed, too, and was about to ask the kids what movie he should put in out in the living room...until he saw that both of them were beginning to fall asleep. "Aww, Ford...look at this..."
Dipper and Mabel quickly sat up, stretching a little bit. "I'm not sleepy," Mabel mumbled, holding Waddles closer to her.
"We never said you were, you silly goose," Ford teased gently, a warm smile on his face as he ruffled her hair.
"Thank you, guys..." Dipper suddenly said with a yawn.
"Whatever for?"
"For the awesome snow day," Mabel piped up quietly, drifting off to sleep as she spoke. "If today was any indication...this is gonna be the best Christmas ever..."
"Aw, sweetie..." Stan smiled. "Little early t'say that, isn't it? Christmas hasn't even started-"
"Stanley..." Ford put a finger to his lips and pointed at the kids. Both of them were already fast asleep.
"Ha! Jeez...that was fast," Stan laughed, only remembering to lower his voice halfway through the sentence. Rather than disturb the children, he and Ford simply pulled their blankets up over them (and Waddles as well, for Mabel had resorted to hugging him in her sleep as if he were a plushie) to keep them warm.
"You remember when we used to be like that?" Ford said.
"Yeah," Stan replied, laughing. "Y'know, Ma said that one time, on New Year's, she practically had to drag both of our butts into bed 'cause we were sacked in front of the TV waitin' for the ball t'drop."
Ford tried not to laugh too loudly. "Oh, God, I haven't thought about that in a long time...don't remember a thing about that night, and I wasn't even drunk." He paused for a moment. "Speaking of dragging kids to bed...do you think maybe we should take the kids up to-"
He happened to turn around just in time to see that Stan himself, with his arm around Mabel and Dipper, was beginning to drift off. He smiled to himself. "You know what? Never mind..." He reached over and turned off the lamp. "Goodnight, Stanley. Goodnight, kids," he whispered.
Stan was still awake enough to hear. "'Night, brother. Sweet dreams, kids."
Ford was the last to fall asleep. He pulled a blanket up over himself, wrapped his own arm around the kids, and once he was warm and content in the company of his family, he let the crackling of the dying fire lull him to sleep.