"Hello?" Sophie's voice echoed through the darkness. It was epic.
Truly epic.
"Soph?" Logan called out to her friend, her voice also having an epic effect.
A truly epic effect.
Truly epic.
"Logan!" Sophie called back.
"Sophie, I need to ask you something..." Logan said, her voice leaping to an epic tone.
"What is it Lo?"
"What's with you and the word epic? You've used it-" Logan stopped to count on her fingers. "-six friken' times already."
"Sorry!" Sophie yelled back. "You're the one with the computer! … and hey! Why the heck is it so dark and what is this? Mist? Yeah. That's mist, what the heck is that about?"
"It makes it more ep-"
"SEVEN TIMES!"
Yeah, yeah, I know... Hey! Waddya wanna do now?"
"Um..."
"There's a sale at Penny's!"
"What-? That was really random."
"Ever seen the movie 'Airplane?'"
"Oh-"
"Exactly."
"How about we make the darkness go away and go to IHOP."
"Okay. Just open your eyes."
"Oh yeah." Sophie opened her eyes to find herself in her room.
"I'll go get some cash." She said, leaving Logan alone in the room with a Fanfiction tab open. That was about the worst disaster ever waiting to happen.
"Logan." Sophie said after she got the proper amount of money. Logan already had five tabs worth of Edvy fanfiction out.
Sophie clapped and a spray bottle appeared in her hands.
She sprayed Logan in the face five times and lightly kicked her in the side.
"No. No. Bad." Sophie said slowly.
"Hey! Where the heck did you get that?" Logan asked.
"You'd be amazed at what a fanfiction author can get a hold of."
"But why was it full of llama spit?" Logan asked.
"Because silly, water is boring." Sophie answered as she helped Logan up.
"C'mon I'm hungry let's go."
Logan and Sophie walked down the hall, passing Sophie's little brother, Bruno, who was cheerfully playing with Wall-E.
"Dang plotholes." Sophie muttered.
"She will be totally Gangsta and have awesome hair." Logan finally stated as they constructed something of the Devil's work in IHOP. A Mary Sue.
Sophie finished a small sketch of their Sue and presented it to Logan.
"She's perfect! Everyone will hate her!" Logan smiled.
They had a plan for a fanfiction called 'Snow White and the Seven Sins,' where a Mary Sue finds her way to the homunculi, and after 50 chapters of agonizing Sue talk and other Self Inserting from a grammatically challenged Suthor(Mary Sue Author) scenes, she gets killed in the most inhuman way possible.
Their Sue was named Miranda.
Sophie laid the picture on the table, and seconds after that, Logan split blueberry syrup all over it.
Logan held her breath for the lecture Sophie was probably going to give, but it never came.
Sophie was lost in thought. She was comparing her life to Princess Peach's.
Logan shoved the paper in her purse and ate the rest of her pancake as epically as Light eats potato chips.
"EIGHT!" Sophie yelled, ignoring the annoyed looks from the people in McDonald's uniforms.
"Hey, is that blueberry syrup you're eating?" Sophie asked.
"NO" Logan denied really loudly.
"Yes that is! Didn't your mom say you get really drunk every time you eat blueberries?"
"SHAT (hic) FRIDGEN LIAR!" Logan yelled back, totally drunk.
She lost control and her face went soaring into her plastic cup of orange juice. It promptly broke and orange juice went splattering everywhere.
It even hit Captain Kirk, who was across the room, chowing on a delicious waffle.
Sophie sighed, still shoveling pancake into her mouth even though her front was sticky from the horrendous juice.
She then noticed that the word 'shoveling' had the name of that one Asian guy in Fullmetal Alchemist in it.
Sophie looked down at Logan, who was still laying in the puddle on the table. She shrugged and thought of happier thoughts, like flying penguins.
Later that night, Sophie, Logan (Still drunk), and Bruno sat around a triangle shaped table, because triangles totally pwned circles.
Sophie started to take a drink of her juice when Bruno fanatically started to scream, "DON'T DROWN! DON'T DROWN! BE CAREFUL! DON'T DROWN!"
"She won't (hic) fridgin' drown! 'Kay Tyler!" A non-sober Logan said.
"His name is Bruno." Sophie corrected.
"Oh! Tanks (hic) Snoopy." Logan slurred. For the second time that day, Logan face planted into her own food.
"Oh! Wanna know what me and Wall-E did today?" Bruno shouted.
"What?" Sophie asked nonchalantly.
"Well, first we ate bacon with Chuck Norris, that was awesome! But then Wall-E shocked him, so he got pissed off and took it out on the Progressive lady and-"
"Bruno, what the heck happened!"
"Well of course she died! So I played with her corpse for a while."
"What the heck is wrong with you?" the non-drunk girl at the table shouted.
"Well Sophie, something with that much plastic surgery must not go to waste."
Sophie rolled her eyes at the cute psychopath before he opened his mouth to talk again.
"Hey sister, does it take two to tango?" He asked very seriously with one eyebrow raised.
Sophie got up from the table, patting the psycho on the head as he followed her. She washed her dishes and turned off the lights in the dinning room before trotting upstairs to bed.
Logan was forgotten.
That night, there was a thunderstorm and a creepy strike of lightning struck dangerously near the house. There was scary foreshadowing organ music playing everywhere. Inside Logan's purse, the picture of the Sue was glowing.
It was activated by the magical blueberry syrup.
The picture of the Sue grew larger and larger until it turned into a full sized, breathing girl. Miranda was alive!
The Sue was drawn with skinny jeans and a t-shirt on.
But that was not her taste.
Miranda quickly used her perfect knowledge of sewing and sewed herself a strapless cocktail dress out of the dark purple purse. She dressed into it quickly in the creak of the night
She moved around the house swiftly and so smoothly it was epic.
"Nine!" Sophie unconsciously yelled upstairs in her bed.
The Sue got scared and ran out of the house, her long wavy curls of shinny black hair cascading behind her in the nonexistent wind.
Later in the night, she somehow managed to open the Gate (or the Gate opened it self ooooooooooo WTH?) She was sucked in and was thrown into Amestris while several others were flung out...