Title: How Deep Is Your Love
Author: Bepatientimadoc AKA justlovebt
Fandom: The Good Wife
Pairing: Alicia/Kalinda
Word Count: ~3900
Disclaimer: I don`t own any of the characters nor the songs… Just borrowing, hope that`s ok.
Musical inspiration: Saturday Night Fever songs: How Deep Is Your Love and If I Can't Have You.
Genre: Romance
Prompt by Piadu: Kalinda/Alicia Disco Dancing
Summary: `Alicia?` ` Yes?` ` Nothing…`
Author`s note: Surprise Pia, this one is for you!

I wrote this for Sweetjamielee`s Plan B summer ficathon, for a prompt: Kalinda/Alicia Disco Dancing. Hope you enjoy! Would love to find out what you think!

How Deep Is Your Love?

Alicia looked up when she felt the little hairs in the back of her neck rise. She had learned, the last couple of months, what the shiver, -that now ran through her, making her body tingle- meant. The corners of her mouth were pulled up by invisible strings when she caught sight of the reason of her bodily reactions. Kalinda pulled off her sunglasses and smiled back, the little crooked smile that always made Alicia`s heart stop, before she put her attention to the girl next to her.

Grace had been waiting with her, but, when she had seen Kalinda enter she had gotten up to leave for her appointment with Shannon. Alicia suspected her to want to give them their space, but was a little afraid her daughter was trying to avoid the Indian investigator. Her fear however couldn't have been more misplaced, she realized when she witnessed their interaction.

Alicia`s eyes widened in surprise when she saw her daughter casually kiss the Indian woman`s cheek and she could not begin to describe the emotions that ran through her when she saw how Kalinda, awkwardly but affectionately, pulled the girl against her in some sort of strange half-hug. The force of the wave of tenderness that rushed through her scared her a little, and she looked down to the little diner`s menu, trying to get a hold of herself.

She did not need visual input to know Kalinda was near, her body told her that much, but the soft brush across her shoulders as the younger woman passed her, was not unwelcome at all. She looked up and knew she blushed when Kalinda brushed her lips over hers before smoothly sliding in the chair opposite of her.

`Hope I didn't let you wait too long?`

With any other person, it wouldn't be an apology. With any other person, the sentence would come across as a statement, a dismissal. But not with Kalinda. The dark eyes, now freed from the hiding shades, looked at her with concern and lit up as she shook her head.

`No, I was early. But Grace kept me company.`

Alicia shivered as she felt Kalinda`s hand on hers, the softness of her skin combined with the fine sandpapery feeling of the callus on her thumb always did amazing things with her. She could feel, just as the woman touched her hand, how those expert fingers caressed her, finding places, pleasure, she had never experienced before. She shivered again as the investigator slowly moved her thumb over the back of her hand, and looked up in knowing, twinkling eyes.

`Do you want to order?`

At the moment Kalinda spoke the words a plate of a chickenburger and fries was placed in front of her, as well as a milkshake that, according to its color and thickness, could only have been made with fresh milk and strawberries. She blinked and barely seemed to notice an almost identical meal that appeared for Alicia. The lawyer smiled, pleased with herself she had finally, obviously, managed to surprise her girlfriend, and asked the waitress if they had the barbeque-sauce Kalinda was so fond of.

Alicia realized her mistake the moment she turned around, and saw Kalinda`s pale face, the eyes moving from the plate to the little bowl of the special sauce, that was now brought to her. Alicia froze, gauging Kalinda`s reaction, and was just about to apologize when the careful smile broke through in the other woman`s face. It was a smile she had not received before, she was certain, and when she saw the investigator swallow, she felt her heart swell.

`Alicia…`

`Yes?`

`Nothing.`

Alicia smiled, focusing on the food before her. They had had this exchange before, and she knew they would, many times. She had started to suspect the intention behind it a few weeks ago, when she had caught sight of the conflict in the investigator`s demeanor. She saw in Kalinda`s eyes the words that she was trying to say, but that didn't seem to find their way through her steel armor. She had wanted, herself, to utter the 3 little words, so many times already, but couldn`t help fear it would scare her girlfriend away. She even felt guilty calling her the G-word in her mind, because even though they had had a short and awkward exchange about exclusivity, they had never spoken in terms of a relationship, of partners, of girlfriends.

They silently ate their food, but the silence was not an uncomfortable one. Nothing like the silences that had stretched, tormenting her, the times they had been in a bar before… after… Alicia shook her head in order to try and organize her thoughts. The time after they had tried to reconcile and the time before they succeeded, would be the best way to phrase it, she decided. She blushed again –still- as she thought how forceful… how passionate that reconciliation had been.

The lawyer smiled as she watched the investigator eat her food, she ate with a carefulness with someone who had known hunger, but not recently. She didn't scarf down her food, but tasted every bite as if it could be her last. Alicia loved to watch the ritual, the way the woman dipped a fry in the salsa before bringing it to her full lips. At times a drop of the red sauce clung to her mouth, and the tip of a tongue teased out in order to catch the culprit. Alicia almost moaned, and, at times, forgot to eat until those knowing eyes caught sight of her again and smiled. She loved it when Kalinda smiled with her eyes. It was so… comforting. It gave her hope.

When the waitress had taken their plates, and Alicia watched Kalinda lean back in the red leather and aluminium chair that seemed a requirement for these kind of establishments, she was again surprised how well the woman fitted here. It should be the silliest sight, the high leather boots, the wavering skirt covering the cheap seat. But no matter where she had suggested they`d go -and Kalinda never refused- she always seemed completely in place. And also completely at ease. The dark eyes twinkled, and Alicia knew the younger woman was up to something.

'What?'

She asked, resigning, already knowing that, whatever Kalinda had in mind, she was in. It was simply impossible to deny the investigator anything.

`Isn`t this the part where I accompany you to the juke-box, pull out a coin and let you chose a song?`

The playful words had a serious undertone and for a moment Alicia`s breathe caught in her throat at the intensity of Kalinda`s stare. She swallowed, the air heavy with unspoken words, hopes and promises she could not help to hold dear. Maybe it were those hopes that had made her choose the song she chose. But the moment she had pushed the square little button, she knew it wasn`t smart. Not smart at all. Was she trying to scare away Kalinda, with all these hints and pushes? They were not meant, but surely came across, as such. As the tones filled the establishment she had to suppress the urge to ask Kalinda to dance with her. Alicia mentally kicked herself. Yes, she was head over heels for the smaller woman, in a way she had never even imagined possible. But dance, in the middle of the day, in a place where she would, most surely, trip over the aluminium chair or table-legs that seemed to sprout from the floor at the most impossible places, just in order to feel the other woman`s arms around her. She was pathetic.

I know your eyes in the morning sun
I feel you touch me in the pouring rain
And the moment that you wander far from me
I wanna feel you in my arms again

Her thoughts on how pitiful she was, were confirmed when she heard herself talk, without interruption, about the song. She, so much, wanted to show Kalinda the words were not meant for them –which was ridiculous, considering how much they applied- in order to not ask too much of her reserved girlfriend.

And you come to me on a summer breeze
Keep me warm in your love and then softly leave

`John Travolta? Really?`

Kalinda`s eyes, always the most outspoken about her, twinkled with delight at the revelation that Alicia had had a crush on him. As the lawyer heard herself say she had especially liked the shiny white suit he used to wear –an admission that had nothing to do with wanting to hear that throaty laugh… Well, at least not solely- she almost groaned as she saw the crooked teasing smile, knowing this was not the end of this. But, at least, Alicia was certain, she had distracted Kalinda from the romantic and inquiring lyrics.

How deep is your love
I really need to learn
Cause were living in a world of fools
Breaking us down
When they all should let us be
We belong to you and me

Or had she? Suddenly Kalinda captured her hand again, stroking the palm and evoking sensations no one else had ever been able to elicit in her. Her heart started to pound when the other woman looked at her, tenderly, from behind thick eyelashes and noticed that Kalinda looked more vulnerable than she had ever seen her.

`Alicia?`

`Yes?`

`Nothing.`

Alicia smiled, and squeezed the hand that help onto hers, knowing that, for her, from now on, `nothing` would mean a whole lot of something.


'So… Do you know what day it is, today?'

Kalinda was obviously uncomfortable, a sign that the answer that come to mind rapidly was not the correct one. Alicia rarely saw her girlfriend THIS tensed, unless it came to discussing feelings. She smiled as she remembered their awkward conversation after the first time they had slept together. But Alicia had learned, a little at least, to speak Kalindian. She was now, for example, quite sure what the word `nothing` meant, in the investigator`s dictionary. In the beginning she had tried to help Kalinda put her feelings in words, but soon Alicia had learned that patience was much more rewarded in such circumstances and now she waited, her heart palpating rapidly.

`Saturday?'

She offered, pulling the Indian woman closer to softly kiss her lips.

For a moment, the world stopped as she felt her lips touch Kalinda`s and, suddenly hungry for more, she let her hand slide in the soft curve of her girlfriend`s neck and pulled her closer. She grazed the skin of Kalinda`s bottom lip gently with her teeth, before tracing the outline of its softness with the tip of her tongue. When the investigator granted her the access she was seeking, something in her chest roared proudly when she heard Kalinda moan. Their kiss deepened as Alicia pushed Kalinda against the wall, looking for support for both of them, while she went on with the tender but passionate exploration of Kalinda`s mouth. She loved the softness, the sensation of melting together, the heat that the almost-friction of their almost-touching bodies produced.

She loved, -and, if she was honest, feared that she loved too much- the lack of control she had when it came to the other woman. Sometimes just her scent got Alicia so aroused, she had to drag her girlfriend to a bathroom to have her way with her. She blushed as she remembered a recent encounter, where Kalinda had gone –reluctantly- shopping with her and what had happened in the changing room. The breathlessness of the kiss and the memory combined caused her to shortly break the kiss, allowing her forehead to rest against Kalinda`s.

'Ok, I rephrase, when I started THAT it was Saturday, I have no idea what day it is now…'

She panted as she spoke the words, and she saw her own fierce, almost primal desire or need reflected in the dark eyes before her. She had rested her hands each on one side of Kalinda`s face, capturing the woman with her body. Alicia licked her suddenly dry lips, and was happy to have support of both feet and hands when she heard Kalinda`s next words.

`It`s our anniversary.`

Nothing could have surprised her more than those softly spoken words, really. The astonishment must have been clearly visible on her face because Kalinda wiggled herself free and started to pace, something she only did, Alicia knew, when she was extremely nervous. The lawyer followed the beautiful younger woman with her eyes, and counted back, something she had not allowed herself to do before. She gasped a little when she came to the conclusion. 6 months. Had it really been 6 months? Kalinda`s words confirmed it.

`We`re together for 6 months, ok?`

The words almost came out angry. Not in a `you forgot our anniversary` kind of way, but more in a `damn woman for making me remember these kind of things` kind of way.

Alicia smiled, an immense wave of tenderness raging through her. It took her a while to realize Kalinda had said `together`.

`I`m so sorry… I didn't get you anything…`

She sort of stuttered, her voice shivering as did her body. What did it mean that Kalinda was remembering this kind of thing?

`Oh just get in there!`

Kalinda gestured wildly in the direction of the bedroom, her behavior still adoringly sharp but with an edge of tenderness. Alicia smiled broadly, trying to ignore the butterflies in her abdomen as she watched her girlfriend walk away. The sway of her hip and tightness of the black skirt she had come to appreciate more and more, causing for a delightful view. Kalinda caught her eye as she, half, turned around and her eyebrow cocked in recognition of Alicia`s staring.

`Oh, and look in the box on the bed`

Her voice sounded exasperated, as if she had just ran a few miles, and Alicia felt her body respond at the knowledge it was desire that made her girlfriend sound like that. She was so dazzled it took her several moments to realize what Kalinda had just said about a box and a bed. A few steps and half a turn again.

`Oh, and put it on.`

Their eyes met this time and the lawyer watched the flickering nerves ooze from her girlfriend`s demeanor. Insecurity. In Kalinda. What in the name of… whoever… was going on?

'Oh and Alicia…'

'Yes?'

Alicia already knew what was coming, when Kalinda broke eye contact, and smiled.

'Nothing…'


The box was white and rectangular and big and was sitting in the middle of satin sheets. Small dark red rose petals were spread around and over it, and Alicia amused herself for a moment with the image of Kalinda, muttering to herself that she was crazy, while preparing the romantic gesture. She took one of the petals between her fingers, surprised by its velvety softness and blushing because of the associations her mind was making. She tried instead to focus on the color. That didn't help either since it seemed to be the the same as Kalinda`s lips, a dark, warm red that drew her in. Alicia sighed and, in a moment of romantic weakness, placed the petal in the book that was laying under her nightstand. She smiled, when she saw how the book had opened on the unlikely page-holder an old change of address card had made, and directed her attention to the white box again.

Careful, as if something would jump out from under the lid, she started to tilt the heavy carton. Red… Red fabric oozed out of the box as soon as it was freed from its white prison, and as she discarded the lid and let her hands slide over it, she had again that strange sensation… She was turned on, by the kiss, by the sense of softness on her fingertips that made her think of Kalinda`s wetness for her. But there was also something constrictive around her windpipe, something emotional, something that made her think she was very close to crying. She had tried so hard to not ask anything of the younger, more reserved woman that now, this gift –and with that she did not mean the dress, which was, by all means, gorgeous- touched her to the core. Kalinda did that to her. With little things. With buying a carton of milk to put it in her fridge, with casually offering her horseshoe necklace sometimes when she thought it would compliment Alicia`s outfit.

Alicia swallowed when she started to undress, the contradicting emotions raging through her with the speed of light. She smiled and almost moaned when she felt the supple fabric envelop her, the red in beautiful contrast with her pale skin. She knew how much Kalinda liked her in red, and smiled at the idea that, maybe this way, she could make the present for the both of them a little. The small red heels that accompanied the dress were a perfect fit, and for a moment Alicia felt like Cinderella, princess-like and awaiting her knight in shining armor.

Only when she sat on the bed she heard the soft music playing in the background, and realized it must have been there the whole time. The dulcet tones of the song she had once made appear out of a jukebox made Alicia shiver. Of course she`d always known Kalinda had an immense attention to detail, but this… this romantic gesture was more than she had ever been able to anticipate, or, even had allowed herself to hope for.

And you may not think
I care for you
When you know down inside
That I really do

After a moment, the music changed, and a tap on the door made Alicia jump up. The red waved around her, caressing her calves and making her tremble, she hoarsely croaked out an admission to enter…

Everyone else would have looked ridiculous, but not Kalinda… Never Kalinda. The white tuxedo hugged her in all the right places, showing a feminine curve John Travolta`s outfit had never done. But Alicia didn`t complain. She didn't complain at all. When Kalinda drew nearer, she saw the tentative smile play with the younger woman`s lips as she offered her hand.

`May I have this dance?'

Of course Kalinda moved with immense ease, Alicia thought, when she felt herself being pulled closer and her body merged with her girlfriend's. Every time they made love, every small, everyday movement, when the woman dressed or ate her breakfast, everything was a dance for her. But still, she had not expected this.

If I can't have you
I don't want nobody baby

How did Kalinda move her around with so much ease, when she sensed as if she could hardly keep upright? Her knees felt weak with overwhelming sensations, as Kalinda pressed a thigh between them and pulled her upper body closer, slowly grinding against her in the rhythm of the music. The soft hands on her back, which was left bare by the dress, felt more strong than any other hands that had ever held her. She trusted these hands, she knew she was safe in them. Feeling how Kalinda pressed her upper body against her own, Alicia moaned at the sensation of the soft and pliant breasts, caught behind the stiff fabric of the tuxedo`s shirt. The other woman dipped her back, holding her tightly as she felt as if she floated in the air. When Kalinda`s lips found her neck at exactly that moment, Alicia felt her last bit of coherent thinking, resolve…


`Alicia?'

Kalinda`s chest vibrated under Alicia`s hand, something that always comforted her. The dress and parts of the suit lay discarded around the room, their naked skin caressing each other in a tight, satisfied embrace. She played with the soft skin and was fascinated how her touch, her fingertips had such an effect when she saw goosebumps appear. A sharp inhalation of air told her all she needed to know, and she, almost automatically, but with careful precision to engrave all the sensations into her memory, turned her head and kissed Kalinda`s nipple.

'Yes?'

She heard it first, in the catching of breathe, felt it in the caress of the small of her back, then, when she allowed herself to look up, she saw it, in those dark sweet eyes full of turmoil that held all her emotion. Alicia felt how her heart picked up the pace of the one under her lingering hand. The smile had already started to play on her lips, the smile that allowed Kalinda to break eyecontact, that showed her it was ok, really… That she didn`t need to say it.

Only Kalinda didn`t look away.

Alicia`s heart stopped for a moment.

`I love you.`

THE END