Warning: Pandora-centric with no other characters. Yes, they are referenced, but this is all Pandora, guys, so if you hate Pandora, or if you only clicked on this fic to read around Pandora and to find the other characters, I suggest you turn back now.
Pandora wasn't quite sure how it happened. He wasn't very sure about a lot of things lately, which wasn't like him at all, but then again, what could be done to change it?
Ever since Shiva had become an official and been granted a permanent place in the shrine, he had been hanging off Pandora's arm at every moment. He wasn't given many missions, none to the human world, and he had yet to receive a little shoulder creature as most of the other officials had.
He would smile and laugh when he was with Pandora and his eyes would light up and the sight of it would make Pandora's heart flutter for some odd reason. It was an unusual situation, to say the least. And Pandora was inclined to think it was also at least very ironic. Every time Shiva would laugh or smile or get that twinkle in his eyes would be when the topic of discussion was Judas.
It made sense, Pandora constantly reminded himself; after all, the reason for Shiva's being here was Judas. Of course he would wish to speak of him as much as possible.
Still, as time passed, Pandora began to experience more and more the ugly feeling of Jealousy stirring in his heart. And not of Shiva. No, this jealousy was directed solely at Judas, who held so much of Shiva's attention and didn't even realize it. Or he did and he simply didn't care, which was possibly worse.
Pandora was no fool, he knew that it was never going to be possible for Shiva to have what he desired with Judas. First of all, there was Shin, whom Judas was very obviously pursuing, even if it was subconsciously. Second of all, there was the nature of an angel's love; most of it was given to God almost as an obligation, which Pandora always tactfully looked around. The bit of love that an angel was allowed to keep could be, and usually was, given to a fellow angel, most likely one of the infants, who needed to be nurtured in much the same way human children did. There were some angels, though, who saw fit to give their love to other adult angels in a way that very much resembled the human bond represented by marriage. That love was a little bit more complex in nature as it involved something that not many angels knew about and from which Lord Zeus guarded them viciously: sex.
Pandora was, again, not a fool. He knew what sex was, knew what it accomplished and why it was necessary amongst the humans. He knew that it was a sin when not used for its rightful purpose and only for carnal pleasure which was why it was never so much as mentioned in Heaven; there was no practical purpose it held and thus would only be used for carnal satisfaction. God could not have his angels sinning with one another willingly left and right.
The desire for this kind of relationship was what plagued Shiva and so many other angels like him, though they certainly didn't realize it. Pandora had often puzzled over this when he had a few moments to himself; why did Zeus give angels the desire for this kind of connection? Why make at least their bodies aware of lust and desire but keep the thoughts hidden from their mind and give them the idea that it was taboo? Pandora knew that such thoughts were dangerous and thus never voiced them, but sometimes his treacherous mind would bring them to his attention no matter how he tried to suppress them.
All the more now since Shiva had taken to following him around like a tiny puppy. His mind had commanded him to observe Shiva, his feelings had compelled him to scrutinize his every move, and his common sense and deep knowledge of the Laws of Heaven had given him his conclusions. Shiva was in love with Judas.
Although, Pandora supposed, "in love with" was probably not the correct phrasing for this case, as it would imply that Judas was in love with Shiva as well. No, the correct way would be something like "in love for" Judas. Shiva was waiting within love's grasp for Judas to join him there, and completely unaware of what he already had waiting for him in love's clutches.
Pandora hung his head and took a sip of his wine, schooling himself to a simple sip. Lately, he had begun wondering what it was about the drink that compelled humans to take so much. Sometimes they were inebriated beyond the point of conscious thought and could barely speak or move. Pandora wondered if it was something akin to escapism, and if it would help him escape his feelings of want and need for another angel who was not God.
He chuckled to himself at his weakness.
"What a fool I am," he sighed in his effeminate drawl. Pearl was hiding in his shoulder, frightened of this new side of his master, and unsure of what he could do or say to prompt the return of the old Pandora, the one who lived solely to serve Lord Zeus and craved only his validation and love. The one who disdained all those below him instead of empathizing with them.
Pandora didn't want to tell Pearl that that old Pandora was probably long gone.
Okay, so yayz for another random plotless oneshot! Okay, so this is Pandora-centric, so if you don't like it, don't read it! Yeah, this probably should have gone in the summary but meh.
I have nothing to say about this except yay for ShivaPandora! Personally, I think there is quite a bit in the anime that hints at "FEELINGS" between these two. Maybe not necessarily as much on Shiva's part as on Pandora's. And maybe I'm also just seeing what I want to see but isn't really there, I don't know. But it's in my headcanon and is therefore law! Also in my headcanon is the idea that angels don't really know about sex. I mean, come on. They live lives that are supposed to epitomize everything holy (which includes celibacy) and they're all males who don't make babies together. Zeus does that. So why would they know about sex? Okay, I'm done now!
Saint Beast = someone else's!
