This is my very first piece of FanFiction I ever wrote and it's been sitting in my files wor quite a while. It's kind of old so don't judge me too harshly, ok? It's a one shot!
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I had missed this. The sun shining brightly through the canopy of living trees whose whispers
floated down to my ears and greeted me as I walked, the soft grass beneath my feet that muffled the
sound of my steps, the bright glittering eyes of the forest animals who called out greetings and good
tidings.
Narnia. I was so glad to be back again! I had been brought back a month ago very suddenly in
the train station as I was going down the stairs (which was a bit frightening I will say!) but Aslan had not
yet shown Himself to me to let me know what my purpose was this time, nor had He shown me a reason
for my brother and sisters not accompanying me. I walked on in silence, simply thankful that I was home
again.
A rustle in the underbrush caught my attention and I drew the dagger I wore on my sleeve
quickly and took a defensive stance, ready to fight. I needn't have worried. A rabbit hopped out of the
brush and bowed in my presence. I greeted it with a smile.
"King Edmund," she squeaked in her high rabbit voice, "What a joy it is to see you! My mother
would tell us, her children, tales of you and your siblings and I dreamed of the days Narnia would see
your family return. I am called Thistle and I am a follower of the Great Lion, Aslan."
My smile widened at the loyalty and friendliness of the small creature.
"Thistle, may you be blessed because of your loyalty to both Narnia and its Creator! And I am
honored to meet you." I replied, out of more than just courtesy, but out of the love for all things
Narnian.
The rabbit's nose twitched in happiness and she took her leave with a bow and hopped on.
I knew I was lucky to be here. I missed my siblings though.
Ah, Peter, Susan and Lucy…I loved them more than anything in the world. I did, truly! But as I
walked through Narnia alone I wondered, if time was equal in both worlds and I had been gone for a
month in England, if they even missed my presence. As I wandered among the birch trees I was struck
with the realisation that I didn't even deserve their devotion. I pictured Peter and his wide grin as we
joked about the Golden Age of Narnia and our many exploits. I pictured Susan and her worrying over my
health and happiness as she made sure I was properly dressed for journeys and expeditions. And I
pictured Lucy in all her angelic radiance, her eyes sparkling as she introduced me to a new creature she
met in the forest, her huge smile when we walked along the stream by Cair Paravel, her laugh after I told
a joke, and her warm, welcoming arms and soothing words of comfort when my nightmares woke me
screaming.
Suddenly, at the memory of my past, I shivered. The chill of the White Witch still clung to the
innermost part of me and refused to let go.
I looked up to the sky which had become grey and cloudy and my eyes widened when I saw a
snowflake fall beside me. No, Edmund! I chided myself inwardly, She's dead. She's gone! Aslan killed her
long ago. She can't get to you! But I knew better. She still lived on. She lived on in my mind and in my
heart.
My mind started to race of its own accord, even while I was willing myself not to think about my
past deception and betrayal. I saw the open wardrobe door and Lucy disappearing inside it. I saw a
sleigh rushing toward me and a tall woman clad in white fur. I tasted the Turkish Delight and felt the
dark greed that crept into my soul as she promised me power and rooms of the treat. I saw the anguish
in Lucy's eyes when I denied going with her to Narnia. I saw the dungeon where I sat in shackles,
knowing that my family was being hunted down because of me. I saw Tumnus' face as Jadis announced
that I was the reason he was in the ice cell beside me. I heard my own weak voice tell the Witch
everything I knew about Aslan's plans. I heard the yelp of the brave fox who first addressed me as King
as the Witches wand turned him into stone before my eyes, and I saw the look of pain and love on
Aslan's face when he looked at me and announced my blood had been paid for.
When I opened my eyes, I was on my knees as snow fell around me. My breath came out in
quick, misty bursts and tears streamed down my face. My arms were wrapped around myself as I tried
to fight off the chill that was creeping through me. I looked up and saw…her. There she stood in all her
fierce personage, her white hair whipping around her cruel face as her emotionless eyes bore into me.
Edmund. She whispered, her voice calm and seductive, How cold you look! Come. Follow me to
my house. I will give you your hearts desires and you will never want for anything.
"No." I whispered, more to myself than the frightening image before my eyes. "No, I will never
be a traitor again."
Oh, but you can't run from what you are, my dear. You thought so little of your family that you
handed them over to me for sweets.
"No! You lied to me! You deceived me!" I screamed at her, shrinking even closer to the cold
ground as she looked down on me.
You deceived yourself, Edmund. You knew perfectly well what you were doing and yet you
continued to give me information that I needed to save your own skin. You were too concerned about
yourself to worry about anyone else!
Sobs wracked my body as the truth of her words sunk into my heart. She was right. I had told
those wolves where to find my family and the Beavers. I had told her of Aslan's army. I had betrayed the
entirety of Narnia more than once.
But then I remembered other things. I felt the warmth of Susan and Lucy's hugs and saw the
look of relief in Peter's eyes as I walked toward him. I heard the voice of Aslan telling me things that
were for me to hear and no one else. I saw an army of Narnians who were willing to follow my brother
and I. I heard the mighty roar of Aslan as he flew at the Witch, killing her with one, swift bite. And I felt
the warmth of His breath on my face as He breathed on me.
"Aslan!" I cried out, kneeling with my face to the ground, "Please, deliver me!"
Silence. Complete, utter silence. I sobbed into the dirt beneath me but nothing stirred around
me. Then I felt it. The warmth of the sun on my back and the moist breath on my neck. Aslan.
I lifted my gaze and found myself face to face with the familiar, yet never less awe-inspiring,
golden gaze of the Great Lion. I immediately bowed my head again in respect for my Lord.
"Arise, my son." The rumbling tone of His precious voice made my spirit want to fly. I stood, but my head still hung low.
"Aslan." I stated simply, not knowing what other words to say to one such as He.
"Edmund." His rich voice speaking my name made my head lift and our eyes connected. I was
surprised to find a deep sorrow in them.
"Aslan! Why do you look so sad?"
"Do you not remember the things I told you, Edmund?" his eyes stared into my very soul it
seemed.
"I don't deserve your love, Aslan!" I suddenly felt the words begin to flow from my mind. "I am a
traitor! To my family, to Narnia, to…to you. Who am I to stand before you? I deserve to be buried
alongside the very Witch I betrayed you to. I deserve every bit of pain and suffering I cause others to
face. I don't deserve your forgiveness!"
Aslan rumbled deep in his throat, almost like a growl. His eyes softened and I saw in them love
beyond all compare and a deep, deep sorrow as He came closer to me.
"It is true."
These words hit my guts like a millstone. And I felt tears stinging my eyes again. I knew it, but it
hurt to hear it from the Lion's mouth more than from my own thoughts.
"Edmund, you do deserve these things, as any traitor would. But you have been given your life
because I love you more than you can imagine."
"I don't understand how I can be forgiven." I mumbled.
"Do you not know? Do you not understand? Edmund, when you first came to me, broken and
worthless, I loved you. I had been waiting for you to come to me for so very long. My joy at seeing you
safe was as great as the skies!"
The tears welled up even thicker in my eyes as I met Aslan's gaze. The very love He spoke of
reflected back at me.
"When the Witch claimed your blood I gave myself in your place. My son, my love for you is
unfathomable and my blood has covered your trespass against us all."
"Aslan…" I could barely even whisper His name, I was in shock. I had never known this! No one
had told me what happened that night at the Stone Table. So this is what had been done!
"Do not be saddened by this, my son! For I arose stronger than before! The Witch had no power
over me or any of you! I had given myself in your place and, in doing so, turned death backward and
conquered the grave!"
I was awestruck. I couldn't speak.
"I did it for you, and for all who will call on my name."
The tears that had so long been threatening to overflow suddenly broke through and I fell to my
knees before my King. I was loved beyond compare. I was forgiven.
Aslan laid his golden chin on my shoulder and I felt a purr run though His massive body.
"Now, go and let the past be the past. Dwell no more on your wrongs, for I have already
forgotten them."
Then He was gone. As quickly as He had come. I looked up and no longer saw a forest. I was
standing on the stairs at the station and I saw the smiles and waves of my siblings at the bottom. I
didn't wait for them to get to me. I ran to them. Forgiven and loved unfathomably.