A/N I have to start this by saying this series has no concept of seasons, I have no idea what the date is or where it is in relation to holidays or birthdays, I just add those things in as I see fit. If you all are paying attention it should be about September, but that really doesn't fall into place with the events of my story so PLEASE do me a favor and ignore any concept of time… that would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!
I own nothing!
Jess and Don were stretched out on their bed. Jess was drawing circles over her barely protruding belly. They had just reached the third month and were plotting where to go from there. They still needed to let everyone in on their secret, their families and Maeli included. They had a doctor's appointment in the morning. Jess needed to tell her doctor that the morning sickness had yet to loosen its grip on her. She wasn't constantly vomiting anymore, but the nausea never went away.
"What are you thinking?" Don broke the silence.
"I don't know, I'm conflicted," Jess sighed.
"Talk to me, maybe I can help," he encouraged.
"I'm trying to decide if we should tell Maeli tonight and take her with us to the doctor's in the morning, or wait until we get the official "all-clear" and then keep her involved," she disclosed.
"I think we should wait. I know you want Maeli to be involved in this and I want that too, but tomorrow, there's not much she can be involved in, but we can tell her the second we get done," Don recommended. He set his hand on her stomach. Jess stilled her own hand and set it on top of her husband's.
"Ok, I like that plan, but we're nowhere near done here," she groaned.
"Yeah, we still have to figure out how to tell everyone else," Don agreed.
"And Maeli's movie is going to end in twenty minutes," Jess acknowledged.
"Then we better get a move on," her husband chuckled.
"Well, telling your parents will be easy, I was going to have them watch Maeli tomorrow," she pointed out.
"That's true; we can just tell them when we go to pick her up," Don stated with a nod.
"But I want Maeli to know first," Jess found the flaw in her plan.
"Yeah, well my mom's going to know when we drop her off, she's seen you pregnant before, she'll know," he added. Jess covered her face with her hands. Don reached up and removed her hands. "Take a deep breath and try again," he said softly.
"Why does this have to be so hard? I mean I have enough to deal with being pregnant; I shouldn't have to worry about telling people," she spit out, getting somewhat irritated.
"Alright, new plan," Don started. Jess looked over at him curiously. "You go to your doctor's appointment and I'll stay with Maeli. We'll pick you up and go out to lunch and then we'll tell her. Once she knows, we can use her, let her tell everyone else," he finished with a shrug.
"But I know you wanted to go to the appointment," Jess laid out her one objection.
"I know, but there will be more, and this is the only way I see this working out, plus Danny wanted to meet up and tune up our bikes before it gets cold again," Don smiled.
"You are not taking our daughter on the motorcycle," she warned.
"I wasn't planning on it; Danny was just bringing his over. If I ride, Danny will stay with Maeli," Don explained quickly.
"And you don't think this will bore her?" Jess smirked.
"I guess we'll find out," he smiled.
"Ok, ok, back to the problem at hand, do we have an official plan for our news?" she wondered.
"Well that is up to you," he replied.
"As long as you don't mind, I like your plan," Jess decided.
"Then we have a plan, I say we go to lunch, make quick stops at both grandparents, and then hit the lab. We should get it all over with in one day," Don added.
"That would be nice, but it depends on how I feel," she mentioned.
"Of course, if you're not up to it, we won't push it," he promised, leaning down to kiss her. They were interrupted by Maeli bounding into the room.
"Is your movie over, bug?" Don asked.
"Yep!" she grinned, climbing up onto the bed with her parents. "What are you guys doing?" she wondered.
"Well, we were just thinking about getting some ice cream," Jess announced. She bit back a giggle as she saw the identical surprised expressions on her husband and daughter's faces.
"Uh, yeah, we were," Don tried to recover, shooting Jess a look. She only shrugged and discretely set a hand on her belly. Don shook his head. "so you're going to need shoes," he informed, dismissing Maeli. When the little girl ran down the hall, Don pulled his wife on top of him. "Sneaky Jess, really sneaky," he laughed as he captured her lips.
"Your kid wanted ice cream," Jess smiled when the kiss ended.
"Which one?" Don asked as he moved to put his shoes on and noticed Maeli running back towards their bedroom.
"Umm, both," Jess determined, shrugging one shoulder. Don laughed whole heartedly. Maeli gave both her parents an odd look.
"You ready?" the father asked, scooping the little girl into his arms.
"Yeah! Let's go get ice cream!" Maeli responded excitedly.
Danny put the kickstand down as he shut the motorcycle off in front of Don and Maeli. Don had already pulled his bike out of the underground lot.
"Hey kiddo," Danny greeted, reaching out to ruffle Maeli's curls. "Where's Jess?" he turned to his friend.
"Needed some time to herself, we have to pick her up in an hour or so," Don half lied.
"Cool, then let's get started," Danny suggested.
"Daddy, are you going to ride this thing?" Maeli asked, wrinkling her nose and poking the fender of the bike.
"I just might baby, when I'm done," Don replied as he walked around the bike.
"Where did you get it?" the little girl wondered, knowing they had the motorcycle but really never seeing much of it, since she wasn't often allowed near it.
"Mommy gave it to me before you were born," he answered. Maeli nodded and sat down on the curb. "Are you bored, honey?" Don laughed.
"No, but I'm hungry," the little girl pouted.
"Well, Mommy should be done soon and we'll go eat," he promised.
"Alright Flack, I think I fixed your noise problem, you ready for your test drive?" Danny announced.
"Yeah, I'll give it a go," on replied, throwing his leg over the bike. "Maeli, you stay here with Danny," he finished before kicking off and moving out into the street.
"So kiddo, what's new with you?" Danny asked, picking up Maeli.
"Nothing really, just school," Maeli replied.
"Awesome, sometime soon you should come over and hangout with Jake," Danny suggested.
"That would be so much fun!" she smiled.
"Well I'll talk to your Mommy and we'll make it happen," he promised. The both looked up as they heard Don pull back into the lot. As he shut the bike off, his phone rang. It was Jess saying she was all done.
"Alright Danno, it sounds great, thanks. Now we have to got get Jess and get lunch," Don rattled off.
"No problem, I have to go shower before my shift, so I'll see you guys around," Danny said with a wave.
"Ok bug, let's go get Mommy!" Don smiled and he walked the bike back towards the parking garage.
Jess smiled softly as she slid into the front seat. Don reached out and took her hand.
"Everything ok?" he asked quietly.
"Everything's perfect," she replied with a watery smile. Don looked at Maeli in the rearview mirror. She was staring out the window, completely distracted.
"Tell me about it," Don encouraged.
"I, uh, I got to hear the heartbeat," Jess disclosed.
"That's great, honey," Don smiled, despite the fact he was a little bit sad he missed it.
"She said everything is on track and she prescribed something for the nausea," she informed.
"Great, so are you up for what we had planned?" he wondered.
"As of right now, yes, but can we take it one step at a time?" she asked.
"Yeah," he smiled softly.
They pulled up in front of a small diner. Don helped Maeli out of the back and set a hand on the small of Jess's back as they walked through the front door. Jess and Don took up one half of the booth and Maeli sat by herself on the other. None of them had to look at the menu; they had been there so often, they knew what they wanted. While they waited for their food, Jess and Don exchanged a look. It was time to tell Maeli.
"Maeli bug, can we talk to you about something?" Don started. The little blue eyed girl looked up from her coloring page.
"What?" she asked curiously.
"Well, Mommy and I, We, um," he stammered, not quite sure how to broach the subject.
"Honey, I'm going to have a baby," Jess stepped in, getting right to the point. Maeli's eyes widened to the size of tennis balls.
"I'm going to be a big sister?" she checked.
"In six months, yes," Jess confirmed. Don stayed quiet, seeing as Jess was much better at this than he was.
"Is it a boy or a girl?" Maeli continued.
"We don't know yet sweetie, but you'll be there when we find out," Jess promised.
"Is the baby in your tummy?" she questioned. Jess nodded. "Can I see?" she pressed on.
"Well, the baby is still very small, so there's not a whole lot to see, but I can show you may tummy if you want, but after we eat, ok?" the mother bargained. Maeli nodded excitedly, saying she understood and wanted to see her mom's baby bump. As the food arrived and Maeli dug into her meal, Don released a breath he didn't know he was holding. That went so much better than he envisioned it. Jess noticed his body suddenly relax. She laughed lightly and ran a hand up his spine. She knew he was worried about how Maeli would take the news, but it was out now and the world didn't end. Yes, they still had a lot of things to talk through with the little girl, but that could come at a later time.
When they were done eating, Don grabbed a hand of his wife and his daughter and led them back to the car. Maeli stood next to the car, looking up expectantly at her mother. Jess lifted her shirt to expose the small swell of her stomach. Don got down on his knees and set a hand on Jess's abdomen.
"See bug, you little brother or sister is right here," he pointed out. Maeli reached out and set a small hand next to her father's much larger one.
"Hi baby," she smiled, and then moved her hand away. Jess swallowed back her tears and Don got back to his feet and lifted Maeli into his arms. He kissed her on the cheek. Then he put her in her booster seat and went and got in the diver's seat.
"How are you feeling?" he asked his wife.
"I'm good, pick a set of grandparents and drive," she laughed. Don nodded and put the car in drive.
About twenty minutes later, they pulled up in front of Jess's childhood home.
"What are we doing at Grandma's house?" Maeli wondered.
"We have to tell them, what we just told you," Jess pointed out.
"Can I do it?" Maeli asked.
"If you want to, yeah," Don allowed, smiling at Jess, there plan was falling into place.
"Princess, what are you doing here?" Jess's brother Nick asked when he opened the door.
"I could ask you the same thing," Jess smirked.
"Uncle Nicky!" Maeli squealed.
"Hey beautiful!' Nick greeted, grabbing the little girl.
"Jessica? What are you doing here, honey?" her mother was terribly confused. She stood back and did a once over of her daughter. When Jess looked up and noticed the cheesy grin on her mother's face, she knew her secret was out. Her mom opened her mouth to speak.
"Mom, Maeli has something she wants to tell you," Jess interrupted. Maeli's head snapped up at the mention of her name.
"Oh yeah, guess what," Maeli started.
"What?" Nick wondered, still holding his niece.
"I'm gonna be a big sister," Maeli stated proudly.
"Really Jess?" Nick wondered. Jess smiled and nodded.
"I knew it!" their mother exclaimed, gathering Jess in a hug.
"Congrats," Nick added, offering a handshake to Don and hugging his sister with one arm.
"Are you guys staying for lunch?" her mother wondered.
"Actually, we have to go meet up with Don's parents, so we can't stay, but please spread the news," Jess explained.
"Well, you guys will come over for dinner sometime next week, right?" her mother pressed on.
"Of course, we'll call to let you know when is good," Jess promised and began to gather her family. She knew it was a short visit, but if she was going to be able to get through all they had planned, they couldn't waste time. Her energy level seemed to be a negative number, but she really wanted everyone to know so she wouldn't have to deal with it anymore.
Next stop was Don's family. They didn't even have to go into the house. When they pulled up, both of Don's parents were standing in the front yard, talking to their neighbors.
"Well, isn't this a surprise?!" Don Flack Sr. exclaimed as his granddaughter bolted out of the car.
"Hi Grandpa," Maeli smiled.
"Hi sweetheart, Jess, Don, to what do we owe this pleasant surprise?" Don Sr. continued.
"Well, I think Maeli would like to answer that one," Don Jr. mentioned.
"Mommy's going to have a baby," Maeli announced with a firm nod. Don Sr. cocked an eyebrow at her. "I'm going to be a big sister, in six uh, weeks," Maeli stated incorrectly.
"Six months, honey," Jess corrected.
"I was going to say, I would know if you were going to have a baby in six weeks," Don's mother chuckled.
"You certainly would," Jess agreed with a smile.
"Well, then I guess congratulations are in order," Don Sr. smiled.
"Yeah, I can't believe I get to have another grandbaby!" his mother squealed happily. "Maybe a boy this time?" She question, hugging her son.
"I don't know Ma, we'll have to wait and find out," Don Jr. laughed.
"We're going to have to celebrate," Don Sr. mentioned.
"I know, maybe we can get together with my family and have a small dinner party or something," Jess suggested.
"Oh, I like that idea!" Don's mother stated.
"Good, then we'll put some plans together and let you know, but right now we better get going, we have a million more things to get done today," Don Jr. replied.
"You cops, so busy that you have to cram everything in the few days off you get," Don's mother sighed, shaking her head. Don Jr. just shrugged. The family said their goodbyes and walked back to the car.
"How are you feeling?" Don asked Jess as soon as they got back into the car. He noticed her looking like she was running out of steam.
"I'm good, let's just keep going," Jess instructed.
"Where are we going now?" Maeli wondered from the backseat.
"We're going to see Mac," Don mentioned off handedly.
"Are we going to tell him too?" Maeli asked with a somewhat exasperated sigh. Needless to say, four year olds tolerated being carted around the city about as well as pregnant women did.
"We sure are, and while you do that, Mommy and I have to go to talk to our boss," he replied.
Mac heard his office door open, but didn't look away from his computer. Eventually he did glance over, expecting to see a member of his team. He was surprised to see two blue eyes peeking over the edge of his desk. He opened his mouth to speak.
"You're su'prized that I's here," Maeli interrupted. Mac furrowed his brow in confusion. He knew Maeli was a bright girl, but he had no idea she was a mind reader.
"I sure am sweetie, how did you know that?" he said, encouraging her to come around to the other side of the desk.
"We've been a lot of places today, lots of people were su'prized," she shrugged. Mac lifted her into his lap. She curled into him, clearly tired; it must have been a long day.
"What have you guys been up to?" Mac wondered, knowing Don and Jess both had the day off.
"Telling everybody," Maeli answered cryptically.
"Telling everybody what?" he pried.
"I'm going to be a big sister, Mommy's going to have a baby," she mumbled. Mac had not been expecting that. He smirked at the thought of Don and Jess using their daughter to spread the news. He thought back to how they told the team about Maeli. Those two couldn't just say it. He tried to get a read on the little girl to see how she was taking the news. With as tired as she was, it was hard to tell.
"Are you excited about that?" he decided to just ask. Maeli sat up in his lap.
"Yes! I get to have a little brother or sister!" she replied adamantly. "Do you think Mommy and Daddy will let me help, like I do with Aaron?" she asked.
"I'm sure they will, you are so good with Aaron, you're going to be a great big sister," Mac smiled. She settled back into him.
"Good," she whispered. Mac breathed a light laugh. He assumed they had brought her to both grandparents and now to the lab.
Stella walked by Mac's office, intent on handing in some files. She stopped short when she saw her husband having what looked to be an important conversation with Maeli. She was curious as to why the little girl was in the lab, but she figured she'd find out later. She wasn't going to interrupt them. Well, later came awfully quickly as she ran into Jess and Don in the hallway. The couple had just returned from sharing the news with their commanding officer.
"Hey, what are you two doing here on your day off?" Stella wondered. Don and Jess looked at each other. Stella, the queen of gossip had not gotten a hold of their news yet.
"You haven't talked to your husband yet, have you?" Jess assumed.
"No, I just ran by his office, but he was having a talk with your daughter," Stella answered.
"Well, go talk to him," Don urged with a grin. Stella cocked an eyebrow at him and turned back down the hallway. Don and Jess made themselves comfortable in the break room, knowing people would be coming to find them soon.
"So are you supposed to tell the rest of the lab?" Mac asked Maeli.
"I guess so, but do I have to tell them all by themselves?" she asked, clearly not liking that option. Mac was going to say something, but she wasn't done yet. "I don't want to r'peat myself no more. Why didn't Mommy and Daddy just put all of the people in one room and then tell them?" she finished with a heavy sigh. Mac fought hard not to laugh. Apparently Maeli wasn't your typical four year old blabber mouth, dying to share her news with anyone who would listen. At least not today.
"Well, how about I help you out?" Mac offered, seeing Stella coming towards his office.
"Really?" Maeli's eyes lit up.
"Yeah, now that you told me, I'll help you pass it along," he suggested.
"I'd like that" she grinned.
"Hey, what are you two up to?" Stella wondered as she watched Mac stand up and readjust Maeli in his arms.
"Well, Maeli here just told me that she's going to be a big sister, and we were just getting ready to go spread the news," Mac smiled. Stella's eyes widened and she sped back towards the break room.
"Where's she going?" Maeli wondered.
"To find your parents I assume, should we go tell the rest of the team?" he checked.
"my's well" she replied with a major mispronunciation, throwing her arms out dramatically.
"might as well" Mac corrected.
"Whatever," Maeli grumbled. Mac's eyebrows shot up. Maeli had never been anything less than polite.
"Ok, let's get to it," he laughed, carrying her down to layout.
When everyone saw Mac walking around carrying Maeli, they all gathered like moths to a flame. Yes, Maeli was a frequent visitor to the lab, but she was usually restricted to the offices, so something was up. Mac smiled as he watched his team, save Stella, assemble in front of him.
"Hey kid, I didn't know I'd be seeing you again today," Danny smiled at the little girl.
" This is a surprise visit from our little Maeli," Mac announced.
"Oh really? What is so special about this visit?" Hawkes wondered with a wink.
"Maeli just told me she's going to be a big sister," Mac informed.
"What?" Lindsey gasped.
"Jess is pregnant," he reworded. Maeli gave him a funny look.
"What does that mean?" she asked.
"It means your mom is going to have a baby," Adam provided.
"I believe Don and Jess are in the break room if you all want to take five to congratulate them," Mac allowed. He followed shortly after his team. They were all involved in conversation when he and Maeli arrived in the break room.
Don looked over Adam's shoulder at Mac who just entered the room. Maeli was nestled in his arms. Her head was on his shoulder and she was awake, but barely. Don felt a pang of guilt rise up in him. When he came up with this plan, he didn't even consider how it would affect Maeli. He should have known it would wear her out, just as much as it did Jess. He excused himself from the conversation and approached Mac.
"Someone is t-i-r-e-d," Mac spelled quietly.
"It's been a long day," Don mentioned with a slight frown.
"Daddy," Maeli spoke up, reaching for her father.
"Hey bug," he smiled, taking her from Mac. A small sense of pride overcame him and his daughter left Mac's comfortable hold and curled into him. She was still Daddy's little girl.
"Can we go home?" Maeli requested. Don glanced over at Jess. She looked about the same as Maeli. It was time to get his girls home and if the signs were correct, it was about nap time for both of them. Don slipped around his co-workers and slid up next to his wife.
"Are you ready?" he whispered. Jess sent him an appreciative glance and started her goodbyes.
When the young family arrived back at their apartment, Jess went to go lay down while Don and Maeli made there way to the living room.
"Where did Mommy go?" Maeli wondered.
"She's gonna go rest for awhile, the baby makes her tired," Don explained.
"Oh, can I watch a movie?" she asked.
"Sure," Don allowed.
After he started the movie, he asked Maeli if it was ok, if he went to check on Jess. The little girl grunted something in response. Don laughed lightly, knowing she would soon be asleep. He was however, surprised to find Jess still awake.
"What are you up to?" Don asked.
"Just flipping through the channels, is Maeli asleep?" Jess replied, motioning for him to join her on the bed. He crawled up next to her and she curled into his side.
"Almost, and I think her mother could use a nap too," Don mentioned.
"I know, I just feel like a weakling. I mean, I'm only three months pregnant and I'm already exhausted," she sighed.
"Jess, honey, it hasn't been an easy three months, you've been battling horrible morning sickness and nausea. The way I see it, you're a trooper," he countered. "You need to rest," he added, barely above a whisper. She placed her head on his shoulder and draped an arm across his midsection, letting her eyes drop closed.
An hour or so later, Jess began to stir next to Don. He looked up from the book he was reading.
"How long have I been asleep?" she wondered.
"Just over an hour," he informed and turned back to his book.
"Let me guess, a parenting book?" Jess assumed.
"Yeah, why?" he grinned.
"Well, I think the only time I've ever seen you pick up a book in all of the time I've known you was when I was pregnant with Maeli," she laughed. Don stuck his tongue out at her. "But what else could you possibly need to know about being a dad?" she inquired.
"I'm reading about how to take care of two kids," he mentioned. Jess nodded in understanding.
"Speaking of kids, where is she?" Jess wondered.
"Still sleeping, but I'm about to wake her up, so she'll sleep tonight," he replied.
"and I'll bet anything she's going to be hungry soon," Jess giggled.
"You're probably right, considering I'm starving," Don agreed.
"Donald Flack Jr , you are a grown man, if you're hungry, eat something," his wife scolded jokingly.
"Normally, I would, but I figured you guys would be up soon and I'd make dinner," he shrugged.
"How about I make dinner?" Jess offered. Don's eyebrows shot up. The last place Jess wanted to be in the past few weeks was the kitchen. "The prescription she gave me really works. I haven't been nauseous all day," Jess explained, knowing what he was thinking.
"Then by all means dear, you can make dinner," Don laughed, having no problem relinquishing kitchen duty to her.
After looking through the pantry, cabinets and refrigerator, Jess decided on chicken tenders, mashed potatoes, and corn.
"Mommy?" Maeli mumbled as she walked into the kitchen.
"Hey baby, did you have a good nap?" Jess smiled at her little girl rubbing her big blue eyes with her fist. Maeli reached her hands up, signaling she wanted to be held. Jess bent down to do just that.
"No you don't," Don interrupted, coming up behind Maeli and scooping her into his arms.
"Why can't Mommy hold me?" Maeli was confused.
"You're too heavy sweetheart, if Mommy lifts you, it could hurt the baby," Don explained, making eye contact with both his wife and daughter. He could see the annoyance simmering below the surface of Jess's expression, but he'd been expecting that. He leaned over and kissed Jess's temple.
"Maeli, do you want to help Daddy set the table? Dinner is almost ready," Jess let the comment slide for now. Don smirked knowing she understood his logic. She rolled her eyes at him and set three plates into his free hand.
"Watch yourself Detective," she warned. Don blushed slightly.
Don walked into his daughter's bedroom after she had finished her bath.
"You ready for bed, bug?" he asked.
"Can I ask you a question?" she replied.
"Of course," Don obliged. He stretched out his lanky form on Maeli's twin bed. Maeli crawled up and straddled his chest. "What's up?" he asked.
"Will you and Mommy let me help when the baby comes?" she wondered.
"Absolutely, that's the most important job of a big sister!" Don mentioned enthusiastically. "you can also help out before the baby comes," he added.
"Really? How?" Maeli's eyes lit up.
"Well, don't tell Mommy but in the next few months she's going to need a lot of help. We have to put a room together for the baby and as the baby grows inside Mommy's belly, she going to have a harder time doing things, so there will be plenty to help with," Don explained. Jess bit back a laugh from where she stood just outside the door. She decided to walk away and let them finish their talk. "So, is there anything else that you need?" Don wondered, looking into the set of bright blue eyes in front of him.
"Nope, but I'm sleepy," Maeli admitted.
"Well then, we should get you to bed," Don mentioned. He lifted her off his chest as he stood from the bed. He set her under the covers and kissed her forehead. "Love you, bug," he whispered.
"Love you too, Daddy, goodnight," she mumbled into her pillow.
Don left the room and went to find his wife. She was sitting on a stool at the kitchen island, staring off into space.
"Penny for your thoughts?" he asked softly.
"We're going to have to move," she mentioned.
"What about the guest room?" he wondered, figuring they had more than enough room.
"Yeah, that will work, until the baby gets bigger and we are all on top each other in this tiny apartment," Jess sighed.
"Well, do you want to buy a house?" Don suggested.
"Can we afford that?" she wondered.
"I would think so, I mean we'll have to look around," he answered. Jess reached out and wrapped her arms around his midsection.
"I love you so much," she mumbled against his chest.
"I love you too, baby," he replied, gently rubbing her back. "I'm glad you're feeling better," he added.
"I'm glad to be feeling better," she concurred. The stayed there wrapped up in their hug in silence for a few minutes. "You're an amazing father," Jess's voice brought them back to reality.
"Well, I don't know about all that," he replied bashfully.
"Don, you are, you're not afraid to be honest with her and answer whatever question she may have. A lot of dads shy away from that kind of stuff," Jess pointed out.
"Well, she deserves answers, just because she might not be old enough to understand it all, if she wonders about something I feel it's my job to help her figure it out," Don stated matter of factly. Jess laughed as she pulled back to look at him. He blushed when he realized how noble his statement sounded. "oh, shut up," he said.
"Plus I know you were upset you didn't get to hear the babies heartbeat," she smirked.
"Well, a little bit I guess, but I know I'll be there next time," he shrugged.
Jess moved off the stool and walked towards the couch. She motioned for him to follow. He tossed his body onto the couch and pulled her down on top of him. She shoved her hands into his hair and sought out his lips. His arms tightened around her as he slipped his tongue into her mouth. Jess moaned softly. Eventually they pulled apart. "I'm glad to have my wife back," he murmured softly.
"What, so we can make out like teenagers?" she giggled. Don rolled his eyes and started to kiss her again.