I woke up in the past. I had known this would happen but that didn't make it any less of a surprise to me. This could be any time, anywhere. I could be ten or hundreds of years in the past. I open my eyes, I can see I am inside but it's still cold in here. I fold my arms over my skimpy outfit and shiver, taking a good look around. I'm lying in an enormous hallway, with staircases running up both sides of the room. It seems so strangely familiar… Why it's the Vatican! This is where I met Nicolai when our journey began. I smile thinking back to those days when I knew nothing of his bitter and rancorous ways. It feels odd being here, in what could be a hundred years in the past. It still looks much the same as when I had seen it before, although of course Nicolai probably hasn't even been born yet. I wonder what kind of person he will grow up to be this time around, I guess I won't know since I'll never meet him again.

I look down at my outfit, suddenly worried about my appearance in such a holy place as this - just my luck to end up being warped here dressed like this. I realise that there's nothing I can do about my appearance for the time being and decide to explore the area. I wonder what time in history this is, it's scary not knowing. I hope that I'll be able to get some idea of the year by having a wander around.

I decide to travel up the staircase to the left. I remember this door being locked last time I was here but it opens. There's a long corridor running through here and I follow it, looking around at the décor on the walls. There's a painting of what I assume to be a priest or some high up holy man hanging there. I squint to try and make out the date on it - '1821'. I perk up a little, knowing that I'm less than a hundred years in the past at least. Things could have been a lot worse. I'm just about to continue along to hallway when I run into a man. I feel completely clumsy and apologise, not looking them in the eye.

'It's quite alright,' replies a young voice. It's a voice I strangely know. For some peculiar reason I even recognise the shoes I'm staring at. Brown loafers… Who? I look up and it's Nicolai.

'Nicolai!' I blurt out without thinking. What am I doing? He won't recognise me, we haven't technically met.

He looks at me with great curiosity. 'Have we met?'

I don't know what to say in response, so I try not to look at him for a few awkward moments. 'A…A long time ago.'

'Really? How interesting,' I can see him take a proper look at me, his eyes widen, his eyebrows raise. He is obviously not used to seeing women dressed in such revealing attire, certainly not in a place like this. 'I'm afraid I don't recognise you… What brings you to the Vatican?'

I can't exactly tell him I was warped here from the future by chance. 'I… I'm here to view a certain document. It's of military interest,' I lie.

'I see,' he says. From the way he looks at me I'm not sure he believes me.

I take a good look at him and try to gauge his age. He doesn't look over eighteen; he's carrying a stack of books to his chest. 'Are you a student here?' I ask.

'Yes, part of the Vatican's academy. I spend all of my time here,' he says, not taking his piercing green eyes off of me for a second. 'You look a little lost, do you need help finding your way around? I know these halls more thoroughly than anything.' As he finishes his sentence he gives a little smile that makes me take a step backwards. Of course I have seen Nicolai smile before, but never with such genuine warm and innocence as this. This Nicolai seems to know nothing of the wickedness and bitterness that the Nicolai I knew possessed. But then again, the Nicolai I knew was a good decade older, and a person can change a lot in that time-frame. It's enough time to develop into a different person altogether.

'Erm, yes please,' I reply, trying not to sound as overwhelmed as the situation is making me feel.

He nods. 'Alright right then, to the library it is.' He walks ahead of me, making an effort to hold doors open for me as we travel. His gentlemanly etiquette embarrasses me and I don't know what I'm doing here but I try not to let either of those things show. I catch up to walk alongside him and decide to make conversation so that he won't notice my problems and inaccuracies.

'So… Have you been at the Vatican long,' I ask, looking towards him. He's beautiful, his brown hair glinting copper in the light, his fringe falling into his eyes which are the colour of peridots. His face is animate with youth and loveliness, his wonderful smile the epicentre. Even the way he walks is hypnotically attractive; his hips sway as though each step is a slow dance. I find it hard to distract my gaze from him.

'Since I was a child, yes. I was orphaned when I was eight and I had to fend for myself. Still, after a few years I was lucky enough to be taken in by a priest here,' he says. As he talks I can see a sadness in his eyes which I remember being more prominent when I had met him before. It's less overwhelming, but it's there.

'Orphaned?' I hadn't known Nicolai's childhood had been such a sad one. I feel like I understand Nicolai a lot more from these last fifteen minutes of talking to him than I ever had before.

'Yes, I was a bastard son and my mother didn't have the proper means to look after me. She died trying to keep me alive.'

I don't know what to say to this. I want to comfort him and tell him he isn't alone, but since we're technically strangers I'm not sure it would be appropriate. Still, he seems at ease telling me what is, pretty much, his life story. I wonder that maybe he doesn't have many friends.

'I'm really sorry to hear that.'

'Don't feel sorry for me,' he says, trying to manage a smile, 'I'm sure worse events have happened to better people. For you see, I'm here now.' He stops in front of an enormous and ornate door. 'And we're here now. You do know the title of the document you need, don't you?'

I had forgotten all about my little lie earlier. 'Ah… well, yes… It's the erm, the Émigré Manuscript,' I blurt out, naming the only document I had ever known to even be in the Vatican.

Nicolai takes a step back, his eyes have a look I can only describe as horror. 'And what would you want with a book like that?'

'Somebody high up in the military requires to see it.' My lies are becoming ever more stupid.

'I see. Well, I can tell you that the document you seek isn't even within the Vatican anymore. It was stolen, you see, several years back,' he says.' 'Still, what does this military official want with such a thing?'

'I couldn't tell you,' I respond.

'Why?' he asks. 'Secret military information?'

'No, but as a mere lieutenant, I don't have that knowledge. I was simply sent here to get information on its whereabouts.'

'I understand. Well, I'm afraid I can't help you any further than this; I need to be getting back to my room anyway. Would you care for a cup of tea or something, miss… ?'

'Karin, and yes I would.'

'Lovely to meet you Karin. Well then, come back to my room for a while and we can discuss this further over tea.'

I walk beside him as we climb several sets of steps up to his room. It's a very simple room with a rustic bed and a stove and a washbasin in the corner. There are also several makeshift shelves full of books. Beside his bed there is a nightstand holding only a huge, grand family bible. He heads straight in and fills the kettle. I sit nervously on the edge of his bed.

'Now,' he says, sitting beside me on the bed, 'tell me who you really are?'

I jump a little in shock. 'Who I really am?'

'All that talk about the military, that was all lies wasn't it?'

I don't know what to say. I mean, I always knew he was bright but I never knew he was as clever as to catch me out so easily. 'I… I can't tell you.'

'Why not?' he asks, tilting his head in curiosity. 'Are you here to assassinate somebody or something?'

'Of course not,' I respond.

'Well then, tell me. I promise I won't bite.'

'You wouldn't believe me,' I laugh, not looking him in the eye. I wouldn't believe me either.

'Try me,' he says, giving me a smile that penetrates me.

'Well… I… I woke up here.'

'What do you mean?' he asks.

'See, there. I said you wouldn't believe me,' I say, feeling embarrassed at how stupid the situation must sound.

'I never said I didn't believe you, I just meant that you should elaborate,' he says, smiling gently to reassure me.

'It won't make sense to you, I mean it hardly makes sense to myself and it happened to me.'

'Go on.'

'I'm not from here. I was transported here from somewhere else.'

'You're from a different world?' he asks.

'Another time, I knew you in another life.'

'So what you're trying to tell me is, we were friends in a previous life?'

'Sort of, it's complicated. I knew you in the future,' I say.

'You're from the future?'

'Yes, I suppose I am.'

'So how did you get here?' he asks. 'Are you a witch?'

'No,' I laugh, 'I'm not a witch. A rip in space and time.'

'I see,' he says. 'Was I transported in this rip too?'

'No, you were d-' I stop mid-sentence. 'You weren't with me at the time. Only those who were at the specific location were affected.'

'Sounds like serious magic,' he says, looking intrigued. 'Still, just to make sure that you're telling the truth I want to know a few things.'

'Of course,' I reply.

'First, if you did know me in the future, surely you can tell me my full name.'

I sigh. 'Nicolas Conrad.'

'Very good. Now, the year is 1906. How old am I?'

I make some quick calculations in my head. 'You're… Eighteen.'

'Impressive. Well, just to be sure that you're from the future, one more question. What will my role be in the church in, say, ten years time?'

'You'll be a cardinal and exorcist,' I say, trying to sound as convincing as possible, I want him to believe me.

'Interesting. You answered very quickly and you seem genuine,' he gives me another of his wonderful smiles, although this one seems almost flirtatious in its charm. 'I suppose I'll have to believe you.' He moves closer towards me. 'Can I ask you something?'

'Sure,' I say.

'When you met me before, how well did you know me?'

'Well, it's complicated. We met many times, but I never found out much about you. I never knew anything about your childhood or how you really felt.'

'I see. Were we friends?'

I don't know what to say. 'Do you want me to be honest?'

'Of course.'

'We both cared deeply for each other, but we were on opposing sides.'

'So, we were enemies?' he says. His eyes look sad.

'Yes.'

'So that's how it's fated to be?'

'I don't think so anymore,' I say. 'I think this time will be different.'

'I hope so,' he laughs. 'I don't know why, Karin, but I feel a strange attachment to you. Almost like seeing you sparks off some kind of memory within me.' He looks at the floor, laughing, his cheeks flushing. 'I know it sounds stupid.'

'It doesn't,' I smile, also looking away. 'I… I'm glad you like me too. I've always liked you. Even when I couldn't show it.'

'That makes me happy,' he says. He leans his head on my shoulder. I can feel his hot breath against my skin. 'You know, Karin, you're the first real friend I've ever had.'

He's so close to me that I can smell him, the scent of him takes me back to all the times I had to hold myself back from him. I don't have to anymore. I hold him close to me. I can feel his embarrassment in his body language. 'I always loved you Nicolai, even when I didn't approve of your behaviour.'

He jumps a little, but he doesn't pull away. He kisses my neck. His lips are as soft as feathers. I fall backwards onto the bed and my hair catches on the bedpost so I take it out of the ponytail to untangle it. I can feel him watching me, he smoothes my skirt down over my legs. He looks so shy and embarrassed, it's just adorable. I lay against the pillow, feeling quite tired. 'Am I making you feel uncomfortable?' I ask.

'No, not at all,' he says, his eyes travelling all over my body. 'It's merely… Oh Karin, I fear that I may have committed a sin.'

I laugh a little, he's so sweet. I never knew Nicolai was originally so truly religious. 'I think… I think it's only a sin if you mean it to be.'

'I suppose… I suppose that it's only a sin if it's not felt out of love,' he says, smiling down at me. He lies beside me and I put my arms around him. He holds me very close and bends his head to kiss me on the lips, his hands in my hair. I had always wanted to kiss him, his lips feel incredible, he has such lovely skin, such gentle hands. I kiss him back and his kisses become ever more passionate.

His touch is like feathers as he strokes his hands over my shoulders, down my chest, across my stomach, over my thighs and finally across my pubic bone. It doesn't feel sinful, it feels celestial. Our connection feels like we'd been fighting through numerous different lives to be together just for this one moment.

He gently massages my clitoris with one hand while he strokes my breast with the other, squeezing and teasing the nipple to bring it to errection. He runs his tongue over my breast, gently biting the nipple. He seems to have forgotten the idea of sin just for these moments. He reaches up to kiss me, softly yet intimately. I feel him slip my knickers off and caress and kiss my thighs and clitoris until I can no longer stand it. He then penetrates my vagina with his fingers, his head against my stomach, raining down kisses. I never realised that sex could feel so… Pure. So genuine and intimate, I wonder to myself how this could ever be seen as a sin against God.

'I love you Karin,' he whispers to me.

'I-I love you too,' I reply, although I can barely breathe. Eventually I grab a hold of his hand and bring him up to my level. I look him in the eye, his face is a flush with colour and he has a gorgeous, angelic smile on his face. 'Can I give you my virginity?' I whisper against his neck.

He nods. 'It would be my pleasure to make love to you.' He quickly slips out of his tunic and trousers and returns to me, shy as ever. 'Hopefully my body won't cause offence.'

'You're beautiful, surely you know that,' I laugh.

He grabs a hold of his penis with one hand and my lower back with other and gently guides himself into me. He begins to softly, but fervently thrust in and out of me. He feels so wonderful I wonder if I am going to pass out. I manage to sustain consciousness but when he comes I feel like I'm going to faint. 'K-Karin…' he mutters and collapses beside me, holding onto me so tightly it feels like we're completely one, safe in a huddle of sweat, pent up feelings and linen sheets.

'Will this life be different, Karin?' he asks me, still out of breathe.

'I promise. This time we'll be together until the end.'