Well hello everyone, welcome to my first one-shot on and I really hope you like it! It was a sort of split second thing...one second I was looking up Fruits Basket things on the internet, then I had the desperate urge to write this! It's about my two favorite characters too! I'm going to warn you now this contains a 1-sided yaoi feelings thing and slight violence, and that's why it's rated PG -13. You gotta forgive Akito, come on, you know his twistedness( -- not really a word!) is what makes him so hot! Please review, thanks so much!
This Mortal Coil
Acerbitas
Akito curled his legs up close to his shivering body and lethargically ran his hand over the paneled wooden floor. His other hand slowly curled into a rather weak fist as he groaned slightly with both boredom and the throbbing pain in his gut and joints. In a split second, his eyes flitted downward swiftly as his full dinner plate shuddered faintly on a loose board. His moving hand paused before reaching out to steady it, but he was unable to stabilize it as his own hand had begun to shake. "Stop!" He snapped commandingly and just a tiny bit unsteadily, as if he was both a little put off by his weak body and annoyed that anything, anything at all, would not listen to him. His hand refused to cooperate and shook harder, and in a small vent of temper he flung the tray onto the decorated wall and watched with slight satisfaction as it slopped violently into messy pools. For a minute, the usual downward appearance of his lips changed swiftly on the right side of his face to reveal a small, malevolent smirk. Looking over slowly at the empty door, Akito felt his face turn back to his usual dower look of trivial but continuous aggregation. Why wasn't Hatori there yet? He was three minutes late. Hatori was never late. How dare he be late when Akito was in pain! He needed the pain medication now! Now! His whole body ached unceasingly and he felt himself shudder as the cold ate continuously at his weak, dying form.
"Somebody come clean up this mess! Immediately!" Akito snapped loudly to whoever was supposed to be caring for him today. It was somebody who had no more courage then thin soup—they hid somewhere pathetically and only came out when called. That was the only thing he had really noticed about this particular servant, but it wasn't like he deeply cared anyway. It is better to be alone, he thought firmly and bitterly, all alone. It was better to be alone then to suffer the presence of those who fed off his life-force, those who drank their pitiable existence from his wretched and never-ceasing isolation and pain.
There was a swift scurry of frightened feet as a young girl raced hurriedly out to serve him. He gave her an icy glare and grabbed harshly onto her blowing skirt. Frightened and wide-eyed, she turned to him as she felt the sharp tug on her formerly free garments. "Do it quickly or I'll hit you!" he snarled, his dead and aching heart feeling a slim but pleasurable feeling of power.
"Y-yes, O-Akito-sama!" she stuttered, nearly running over to the place where it was with her armful of cleaning supplies. As she scrubbed dutifully and hastily, he turned from her as if loosing interest. After awhile, she left, skirting widely where his body lay motionless like a cat. He gave a small "hmph" as she left, eyes narrowing after her fiercely. Yes, let them all cower if fear! Let them all crawl to him and beg for their lives! Let them suffer, yes, let every single one of them suffer like he suffered!
His thoughts of throbbing hate were disrupted as Hatori stuck his head calmly into the door, "Hello, Akito-sama," he said dutifully and without emotion, "Your feeling some pain?"
"Your late!" Akito growled with a tone of seemingly impenetrable annoyance, "Why were you late while I was ill?!" Suddenly, his voice morphed into a silky, soft whisper, "Don't you care about me, Hatori?"
"Of course I care about you, Akito-sama. I came as soon as I could. I'm sorry you were in pain, I have brought you your medicine." Still, the voice was calm and unruffled.
How can he always seem so unafraid of me?! Akito thought with renewed flash of fury, If this were Yuki he'd be shaking! I slashed his eye! I got rid of that stupid woman he was so obsessed with! Why?! Why wouldn't he cower like everyone else?! Aloud but softly and with an undertone of lightly veiled rage, Akito whispered, "Come here, Hatori, and relieve me of my pain." His heart felt a twisted, hateful feeling against the woman who had stolen Hatori's heart. Damn her, she didn't deserve him! Damn her! Damn her! His heart felt another crushing curl as Hatori's black, unlighted eyes turned to stare into his own.
"Yes," Hatori said quietly, "yes, I'm coming." With a business-like, secure, and steady walk, Hatori crossed the small space between them and set his briefcase gently down. Carefully opening it, he selected a small, light blue vial from the case and handed it to Akito with the words, "This is stronger then the ones they keep here for you. I'm guessing those no longer relieved your pain. You must drink all of it. It will make you slightly drowsy in an hour or two."
Giving Hatori a small, quick leer, Akito drowned the whole bottle in a gulp. He felt the horrible tasting substance run down his sore and hurting throat and winced slightly. "You should have made this taste better!" he growled disgustedly. Hatori's long, thin fingers fiddled around a bit inside his case while Akito watched them with a tugging feeling that longed for something he didn't quite understand.
"I'm sorry," Hatori said blandly, "I will do that next time. I did not know it would bother you so." Closing his bag with a sharp metal snap, he began to rise, "Well, that should do it for now. I believe you shall feel better soon, Akito-sama."
"Well, farewell," Akito said uncaringly and apathetically. As Hatori rose, however, a strange but well known urge overcame Akito. But this time, he lent caution to the winds, and made the move he sometimes contemplated in his darkest and most desolate thoughts. No matter how much he tried to convince himself of the safety in solitude, he still constantly longed for the human contact he had even more desperately desired as a child. Grabbing Hatori's pants leg before he was fully upright, Akito felt a rush of emotion leap out of his chest as he planted a commanding kiss right on Hatori's startled lips, "You.." he gasped, "You..wanted her! You wanted her and not me! Well, I'm going to make you want me! I'm gonna make you! Make you, Hatori!"
Hatori's eye was wide as he pulled back, briefcase slamming back onto the floor with a loud, resounding thump, "A-Akito-sama!" he stammered in a still semi-controlled shock.
"Kiss me!" Akito roared, pulling at Hatori's hair sharply and revealing a horrible, deep scar over Hatori's eye, "Kiss me, you must obey me!" Akito yelled triumphantly, "Do you want to die?! Do you?!"
Hatori brought his eye to a submissive stare at the ground, "I do care deeply about you, Akito-sama, but I do not love you. I'm sorry." His body began to feel a bit sweaty and cold with amplified fear, but he tried to keep as composed as he possibly could.
With a sharp jolt in his heart like a needle, Akito blew air into his cheeks in an automatic explosion of frustration, "Do you want to die?!" he growled again while releasing the air in a huff of wind, "You must obey!" the voice dropped again to a silken purr and the gasping hand released Hatori's locks to stroke his head gently, "Hatori...Hatori...you're so...beautiful..."
Hatori's eyes stayed fixed on the ground, and his hand brushed faintly over the woodwork as if in a memory far distant and removed from the present place and time. "I'm sorry, Akito-sama," he finally said apologetically, "I would obey you in all other things."
Akito's suddenly re-puffed cheeks again released violently, and he ground his teeth together in anguished torment. Still, the voice remained velvety and sweet like sugar, like a snake creeping up on its prey. "Do you want her to suffer, Hatori? Do you? Well...I can make her suffer so much she wants to die...like I do, sometimes...sometimes...but...oh no, she won't die. Unlike me, her suffering will endure for however long I want...and seem so much like forever! Forever! Maybe, her dear husband will die mysteriously on the job...and then...that little child you watch with such longing...will become ill...and then...and then...pass away...she will be left all alone, so perfectly alone...and she will long for things she cannot quite remember...I wonder why she can't remember, Hatori? I wonder why...? Well, what do you think?" The voice changed again, but this time it sounded eager, hasty and disturbingly innocent, "Is it a good plan? The slight, maniacal but soft laughter that followed lasted only for a few seconds.
Hatori's face grew pale as Akito continued his horrible ploy, and for a second he knelt there, motionless. His heart pumping faster then usual and his whole body felt abruptly and deadly numb. He found all he could do was kneel there for awhile, fingers helplessly sliding and shaking a bit on the rough wood. He could barely feel the slightly trembling hands running over his head with lustful desire.
Akito stopped stroking Hatori's hair and hit him hard across the face, his own face contorting from a small smirk to a mask of rage, "I told you to do it! Do you want her to suffer?! No, of course not! You, you all get to live because of me! Because of me! You should all do as I say! All of you! Now kiss me and hug me! Say you love me, Hatori! Say you love me now, or I'll make sure she's miserable as I can possibly make her! I'll make her suffer! You hear me?! Suffer!"
Hatori's eyes moved slowly and with trepidation towards Akito's own, "If I told you that, Akito-sama, would it be true? If I said it, would I really mean it? If I kiss you—"
Akito's face rapidly turned from a look of extreme malice to a mask of surprised rage, and his hands reached out and snatched Hatori's shirt. To his heightened fury and disgust, he could not longer lift Hatori's body at all. "Shut up!" he bellowed, "Shut up! I know you all really hate me! I know you all can't wait tell I'm dead! Well, I hate all of you too! When I die, you'll all be happy! You'll be happy! Happy! Then, you'll get another little kid! You'll lock him up, leave him all by himself, and make him the loneliest person on the planet! He'll play alone, with the birds, while all the other children stare and run away when he tries to talk to them! To-to play...with them..." For a second, Akito's voice dropped and broke, and he loosened Hatori to the floor. A moment later, he was kicking a vase around with his bare right foot in wanton abandon, eventually smashing it like a bug with his heel. "But oh, no, we can't get close! We can't love him, because he's going to die! We don't want to get hurt! Oh no, we can't suffer! So we'll just give him luxuries and hide away, watching from a distance as he grows up in isolation and abandonment! ...I-I don't want this stuff!" Akito roared, kicking over an extremely expensive table and watching with a twisted pleasure as it spilled it's bejeweled and fragile contents into ruin, "I don't want it! Why won't anybody try to love me! Why?! Even my parents! My parents! The just...fed me...and gave me toys...and...gave me clothes..." Akito appeared to have forgotten Hatori's presence, caught in his own scarred, wounded memories, "That's all! Then, they left me here, all alone...while they played with her! I watched them cuddle my sister through the window, play with her, kiss her! I heard them say...they loved her...her...the one that wasn't going to die! They never said they loved me! Never! Instead, they bowed and cringed and groveled when I didn't even know why! I hate them! I hate them!" Suddenly, Akito's head turned abruptly back to Hatori. When he spoke, his voice hissed with semi-fake abhorrence and revulsion, "And you, Hatori, I know all you care about is your stupid little girlfriend! But oh no, I must die for all of you fools! Nobody is grateful for my unasked for and unwilled assistance; instead, everyone is terrified out of their pathetic little wits! Do I have no feelings?! None at all?! Why was I chosen?! Why?! It's not fair! I didn't ask for this! I-I a-a—a," Unexpectedly, Akito collapsed, gasping unsuccessfully as his lungs refused to admit him air. Still gasping at nothingness, his heart exploded with fear. Not yet...not...yet... When he was curled up in his enormous bed, staring at the wall blankly, death seemed so welcome, so inviting. So silencing of the many types of pain that constantly wracked him. But the difference was, unlike most who wanted to end their lives, he couldn't decide his fate. Not...now...no! Not now! He...he really...didn't...want that...
In a second, Hatori was next to him, gently reaching for his equipment and dragging it quickly towards him. Deftly, he worked to restore the weakened boy to a non-critical state. As Akito slowly began to breathe and suck in air greedily, Hatori spoke in a quiet, doctor-like voice, "Akito-sama, if I wanted you to die, I could have killed you right then, and nobody would have known. That was very foolish, exerting yourself like that. You know you are delicate. ...I may only love one person in the way you thought you wanted me, and that person isn't you. But that doesn't mean I don't love you. Silly boy, do you really think I wait on you night and day because I'm scared of dying? Do you? Do you really think so little of me?"
Akito stared at Hatori wordlessly as he restored his air supply as hastily as possible. He didn't even try to speak, but lay there with wide, uncertain eyes.
"Do you think that after you took her away from me and took away half my vision, I would have just gone to the outside permanently and never come back if I hated you? Do you think that if I hated you as much as you think I do, I would put up with you and how much you hurt her?" Hatori gave him a small, long-suffering and enduring smile and reached out hesitantly to ruffle Akito's hair.
Akito had never, ever had anyone do that to him before. In fact, the only time people touched him was to help him up from a fall or to help him when more then normally ill. Reaching up to his hair tentatively, he felt it strangely disrupted and disturbed.
"I...guess...I...should have noticed...you were so lonely...Akito-s....Akito...I thought you...wanted to be...all alone...I guess...I thought...I should just...do my job, you know? I thought...you would be happy if I...just...I...just did my job...I usually just do my job...and most people are happy that way, if I do it right. I'm...sorry...Akito..."
"Y-you didn't...use sama..." Akito whispered, unsure whether to be angry or overjoyed, "I'm...I'm...not..."
"It's not so distant," said Hatori quietly, "I hope you don't mind." Carefully, he lifted Akito from his rather weak position on the floor and wrapped his arms gently around him, "Feel a bit better?"
"I...yes..." Akito said a bit shyly, then let out a small sob that he tried to suppress valiantly but without success. The alien arms felt strangely comforting, and slowly, worried a bit, he relaxed his body. The pain that was eating him inside remained, but it amazingly and rather frighteningly didn't feel so desperate or hopeless. It didn't feel like anything would ever get better. Suddenly, he felt something inside him ease instead of try to snap. And, instead of fighting back in wild rage, he allowed Hatori to hold him. Not in a romantic way, not in a distant way, but comfortingly, understandingly. Reaching out hesitantly, Akito lightly grasped Hatori's shirt and leaned his head slowly onto his chest.
"I know what it's like to be cold," Hatori told him gently, "I know what it's like...when everything is so empty...when...everything is like...ice...snow..."
Akito let out another small gasp and felt a tear crawl uncertainly down his face. Hatori held Akito tighter at this, with care and gentleness that nobody had ever truly shown the boy before. Akito sniffled, then hacked out another sob. Soon, he was weeping in Hatori's arms with wanton abandon that came from years, years of isolation and separation from other people. For a long time they sat on the floor, not noticing the time fly away as Akito sobbed brokenly and pitifully. Hours went by as they continued their pose, not really noticing their surroundings or the small, shy face of the serving girl peering out from behind a curtain. And eventually, gradually, Akito's pain and hate began to fade.
Yay, did you like it? -blinks- Where is chapter 16 of UE?! Eep, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I'm on it, I'm on it, I'm really on it! -runs around with a pencil in mouth looking frantic- Don't worry, I've not abandoned my story, I'm going back to it now! Right now! On it, on it!
Last notes: The title too this story is drawn from Hamlet's famous "to be or not to be" speech from Shakespeare. "This mortal coil" refers to our mortal bodies, which eventually die. I used it because it reminded me Akito and it sounded cool. One more thing! I do not own Fruits Basket! –sulks- I also don't own Shakespeare. Imagine that!
