Why Azula Hates Zuko
"Father, there's a voice in my head."
Little Zuko blinked his wide golden eyes up at Fire Lord Ozai. Now, anywhere else that would have been a strange statement, quickly followed by a call to the funny farm by whoever it was said to, but the people of the fire nation were not, under any circumstances, mentally stable. It wasn't too strange to have a voice, traditionally called a Boisu, telling you what to do. Everyone who ever had a Boisu went on to do amazing things, most Fire Lords had one. Fire Lord Ozai hoped that this meant his son would become worthy of the Fire Nation's throne.
"That's good, son, listen to the voice, it will make you powerful." Ozai smiled down at Little Zuko and took note of Little Azula quietly fuming in his peripheral vision. That would have to be remedied soon.
Little Zuko blinked innocently at his parents, pupils nearly gone in the bright sunlight. "Then what does 'Bleep bleep bleeeep bleepbleep Lieutenant Zhao bleep bleeeeeeeeeep bleep bleepbleep octopus-rooster bleep bleeep bleepbleepbleep bleep bleep bleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep. Bleep bleeeep bleep bleep bleep bleep whipped cream bleep bleep bleepbleep bleep bleep apple pie bleeeeeeeeep.' mean?"
Little Zuko tilted his head and blinked again, the perfect picture of innocence. His parents jaws had dropped in horror, Little Azula had twisted her up face in confusion, and Lieutenant Zhao turned bright red from where he was standing on guard duty. Fire Lord Ozai gingerly placed his hands on Little Zuko's shoulders. "Zuko, forget everything I just said, never, ever, do what that voice tells you to do." Fire Lord Ozai dazedly marched back into the palace, muttering something about needing to get some hard liquor and Zhao far, far away from Zuko.
He left behind his poor traumatized wife, a highly confused Little Zuko, and a still bright red Lieutenant Zhao. No one noticed the frown spreading across Little Azula's face at the abrupt exit.
She would get to the bottom of this.
A few days later Little Azula, Little Mai, and Little Ty Lee ambushed Little Zuko near a small pond. "Come on brother, don't you want to know what the voice told you to do? It could make you powerful." Little Azula wheedled Little Zuko. "Yeah!" Little Ty Lee piped up "I know the nicest fisherman in the Fire Nation and he knows everything!" Little Azula gave her a weird look. "What does him being nice have to do with anything?" Little Ty Lee pouted, "I like it when people are nice!" she pouted. Little Mai hit her over the head. "Whatever." Little Azula snorted. "Come on brother, aren't you the least bit curious as to what the voice means?" Little Zuko fidgeted. "Well, maybe I'm a little curious." he finally admitted. "Perfect! Let's go!" Little Ty Lee always spoke in Exclamations!, no matter what. Little Zuko was promptly dragged away by the two girls.
"How boring." Little Mai said and trudged after them.
A few minutes, many wrong turns, and a very upset cabbage salesman later they finally reached the docks. The fisherman, a burly guy with many tattoos and an easily trusted face, laughed at the question, sat down, and told them, everything.
When he was done he walked away, whistling happily after a good days work, leaving behind four traumatized little kids. "Oh." Said Little Azula "My." Little Mai said "God!" Little Ty Lee squealed. She went on a nice little rant in the background. "You!" Little Azula screeched, pointing dramatically at Little Zuko. He blinked in a traumatized way. "You." Little Azula hissed, giving him the Evil Eye. Little Zuko blinked some more and Little Azula ran away pulling her hair and screeching like the psychotic little banshee she is.
Little Zuko turned to blink his big gold eyes at Little Mai. "What." She said flatly. Little Zuko turned on the Puppy Eyes® causing a shiver to run down Little Mai's back. "Alright, I'll take you home." She sighed, grabbed Little Ty Lee's pigtail, took Little Zuko's hand, and dragged them on a much safer and saner path to the palace.
A few weeks later dear old Great Uncle Iroh was walking towards Little Azula's room to give her another doll. As he approached the door he heard a high-pitched little girl version of an evil cackle. "He will suffer, SUFFER, for what he did to MEEEE!" Little Azula shouted at the top of her lungs. Iroh did an abrupt about face before he knocked on her door, he might be senile but even he knew to leave Traumatized Feminine Rage alone.
Author's Comments
Alright, ya'll can kill me now. This little Plot-Bunny-On-Acid has been bothering me for a while, and for some reason I really like the idea of Zuko with an alternate personality that whispers all the dirty things Zuko could do at the time in his ear.Use your imagination to fill in the bleeps