Contemplating the waves, I stare dejectedly down at the wildly churning waves. The sea is angry tonight. Perhaps Father discovered I was missing? I can only speculate at this point.
Leaning into my legs, I sob silently. Is this what a breaking heart feels like? My heart could be torn out no more brutally than it has now. Thinking of the long list of people I've lost – my parents, my sisters, my prince – makes me sick to my stomach. A hole is forming in my chest where my heart should be. Tiny bits I can imagine being plucked out and tossed away into the roiling waves.
The sea… it will claim me soon. My last night, and it will be above the water, staring at the stars that I so love. Glancing away from the home that bound me for so long, I stare up at the sky. It looks like black velvet that tiny diamonds were tossed across. So beautiful, but so cold.
Turning my puffy eyes back to the water – no longer a friend but a looming opponent – I wish I could just disappear now. But I can't. Not until the sun begins to touch the edges of the sky can I leave this world.
My gaze is greeted by something popping out from the water. I frown at first, but I identify it as a human shape. A familiar shape! Gasping, I notice the eleven other shapes rising from the waters. Mournfully I smile. It is a teary smile, I know. My sisters have come to me, yet I am doomed.
Glancing about, I am pleased to notice that there are no humans about. Of course not – they're all asleep now. Scolding myself briefly for being so foolish, I turn my eyes out to the stormy gray sea. Eagerly, my sisters swim near the side. Yet I frown. Something was unfamiliar about them. Their hair! The lovely locks which each of them had treasured were shorn from their lovely heads.
I gestured wildly towards my hair, and they nodded solemnly. Adonna spoke first. "We visited the sea witch," she began slowly. Clearly they had told her to speak for all of them. "She said that there was a way to save you – but you will have to be brave, little sister. In return for our hair –"
"You have to use the knife to kill the prince!" Mari cried out. My heart stopped beating. Kill… the prince? I couldn't think. How could they ask such a thing of me?
Glaring at her, Adonna continued to speak. "Yes. There's a little more than that. This knife," she said, raising a crystalline dagger, "Is only good for one use. You cannot miss, sister. Once you kill him, you must bathe your legs in his blood."
"Then you will be able to return to us! To father! You will have your voice back, and you will be happy!" Mari cried out again. I noticed that she appeared to have been crying. Sacrificing her hair must have been hard for her. My heart melted.
"Please, Casse, you must do this," plead Gennova. She was closest to my age, and we had always been able to share things. It broke my heart to see her in such distress. "Will you take the knife?"
Contemplating things, my heart hardened towards the prince. He had broken me after all I had given him. Even after saving his life, he had cast me aside. What did I owe to him? I could start again. I could live. Nodding, I took on the appearance of determination.
They smiled, and tossed the knife on deck. I caught it clumsily, but caught it none the less. "We will wait for you below!" They called out to me.
Alone, I began to creep through the boat. I didn't wish to be noticed, and I did my best not to stumble. But as I was left alone, doubt crept into my mind. Could I kill someone just to get my old life back? But most of all could I kill him? For a day or so he had been my entire focus, and he had shown me such wonders… No. I owed him nothing. He broke me, and I couldn't bring myself to forgive him just yet.
It was a simple task getting to their wedding chamber. I could only guess at what I would find. Opening the door slowly, I saw he and she were both asleep. Her – the princess from across the sea and him. Silently I sidled up to the bed, gazing down at his sleeping form.
Softly, I smiled. He was beautiful asleep, so peaceful. The moment I saw how their hands intertwined in sleep, though, jealously and bitterness filled me. I could do this. I would get my life back, if it was the last thing I could do.
I raised the knife over my head, and shut my eyes. Chanting to myself that I could indeed do this, I braced for the killing strike… and missed. The knife shattered on the bed table, and he and she awoke with a start.
Gasping, I backed away. I could clearly see how those eyes stared at me in surprise. "Mella?" That was the name he had taken to calling me, and I wanted to scream at him for the shocked way he said it. But no sound would come from these lips.
I could hear the guards rushing from down the hall, and I bounded out of the room. I could hear the pounding of feet from behind me, but kept running. I could end this. I had that power. Leaping up stairs, I soon found myself on deck. It was as simple as leaping over the rail, and I would be free…
Arms wrap around my waist just as I begin to jettison myself over the side. "Mella! What are you doing?" I struggle, and I notice that the sky had begun to lighten. I must escape. I must free myself. But the prince is strong. "Why? Why are you doing this?" I know that I will not escape, and go limp.
He spins me around so I face him. His eyes are confused – as gray and as wild as the sea. Sadly, I gaze at him. My last memory would be of those disappointed eyes. I begin to sign. I want to leave him with some peace. Something. My hands dart to my heart, and then I touched the spot above his. Frowning, he stared at me, searching for some meaning. I gesture to my heart slowly. "Your heart," he states unsurely, and I nod wildly. I then took his hands off my shoulders, and cup them together. He allows this, and watches as I make a tearing movement from my chest. "Your heart is taken out?" I nod slowly and continue the pantomime as I put the torn out heart into his hands, close them, and place them against his breast. "Your heart is given to me?"
I nod slowly. Finally I have told him. But he shakes his head. "I love…" I cut him off with a hand to his lips. Mouthing 'I know,' I backed up against the side. It was easy, so easy. "Mella…" He looked torn. I could tell. But I would end it.
'Goodbye,' I mouthed, giving a small smile. He didn't understand entirely. I continued mouthing, 'I love you.' With this known to him, I pushed myself back over the railing. He shouted out. I couldn't tell for long, for I was soon swallowed by the water.
The air was knocked out of me for a few moments, but a few rays of light graced my skin. Slowly, I felt myself melting… melting into the waves. I couldn't remember. There was a muzzy satisfaction in what I had done. He was alive, and he knew how I felt… I was fading… fading… fading…