Queen Luana: I am actually working on a Resident Evil fic at the moment, but as my laptop's crashed and I can't reach any of my files at this point I'll just continue with a little something I had in mind for some time now. It's been a while since I did a DBZ fanfic, so here we go. It will be total randomness at certain points. Jolly good fun.

Chapter I

"Oh, it's you three."

Vegeta snorted as he let in Goku, Yamcha and Krillin through the front door.

"Bulma called," Krillin stated and peeked into the hall. "She sounded, uh, panicky."

The three of them shuffled into the living room but everything seemed normal so far. The TV was on and Trunks was clapping his hands happily while watching Barney the dinosaur.

"So uh," Goku said and followed Barney's moves hazily. "What's the emergency… silly dinosaur…"

Krillin snapped his fingers in front of his best friend's eyes but the big ape already sank down into the couch next to little Trunks. Vegeta rolled his eyes and disappeared into the kitchen.

Bulma sauntered into the livingroom tinkering with another one of her inventions and blinked when she saw Goku looking at the screen almost hypnotised, softly murmurring 'I love you, you love me'. "I knew I shouldn't have bothered…"

"Hey, Bulma, what's up?" Yamcha asked her and flashed her a boyish smirk. When he saw Vegeta's distorted face peeking out of the kitchen he quickly turned it into a bad sounding sneeze.

"Glad you're here," she said and placed the little machine on the coffee table. "I'm going out tonight, important meeting with a client. Since I know Vegeta can't be trusted with a baby, I thought, the hell, maybe fourdimwits with the educational level of a tea spoon can. Now I think about it however, perhaps you'd only make it worse." She shrugged and threw off her lab coat reveiling a neat black cocktail dress. "But as Chi-Chi's attending a parent night with Gohan, you were the only ones available."

Krillin observed the little machine she had placed on the coffee table and leapt into the air when Bulma snapped at him: "Don't touch it! It's not finished yet."

"And what is it… exactly?" Krillin asked and carefully took a few paces backwards.

"It doesn't matter, just keep your clumsy paws away from it," she barked and dangerously pointed a ball point pen at his face before leaning over and scribbling something down on a blocnote. "Anyway, this is my cell phone number. Should the house catch fire or become the prime target of a bunch of homicidal martians, give me a call." She tore off the little piece of paper and placed it on top of the TV. "There's food in the fridge, don't touch that either, and stay away from the booze."

"Good fun," Krillin uttered and sank down into the couch next to the now salivating Goku.

"Now, be a good boy, Trunks," Bulma told the toddler and planted a kiss on his forehead. "And stay away from daddy when he's drunk too much again, okay?" Trunks blabbered something before pointing at Goku who was still gazing at the screen. "Yeah, keep your distance from him as well, sweetheart." She straightened and swung her purse over her shoulder. "Well, I'll be going. Be good boys now." She glared at Krillin and Yamcha. "All of you." She trotted into the hallway and once they heard the front door slam shut they sighed in relief.

"To think that we're doing her a favor," Krillin groaned.

Yamcha sank down into the couch with a yawn and took the remote. "Oh well, Trunks' a good boy. Let's watch the game." He changed the channel and Barney disappeared from the screen.

Goku gasped at him. "Why?"

"Geesh, Goku," Krillin said, "it's just a children's programme."

They all turned their heads sideways when they heard a wheeze. Little Trunks was staring at the screen and his lip had curled dangerously. "Woah, that's not good," Yamcha mumbled, seconds before the toddler burst out into an ocean of tears and eardrum breaking screams. "Dear mother of mercy, make it stop!" Yamcha begged and pressed his hands against his ears.

Vegeta came marching into the room, beer can in his hand. "What the hell did you morons do this time?"

"Put Barney back on, Yamcha!" Krillin pleaded desperately and Yamcha jammed the buttons on the remote.

"I'm trying, I don't remember which channel!"

Meanwhile Goku tried rocking the little boy back and forth. "There, there, there…" But Trunks screamed louder with the second. "Ah, what do we do, Vegeta?"

"Well, how should I know!" he said.

"Try something!" Goku said and pressed the toddler into Vegeta's free arm.

"All right, nobody panic," Krillin tried to calm down the situation while Yamcha still tried every channel while sweat pearled on his forehead, Goku pulled his knees to his chest crying 'make it stop' and Vegeta… "Vegeta!" he cried. "You can't give a baby beer!"

Vegeta dropped the can of beer. "Well, I'm all out of ideas." He dropped the toddler back into Goku's lap.

Goku looked around for any available options, spotted the shiny buttony thing on the coffee table and thrust Bulma's toy into Trunks' little hands. "Look, Trunks, play!"

Trunks blinked for a moment then smiled and pressed the buttons happily. They all sank down into the couch in relief. "I could already see my life flash in front of my eyes," Yamcha muttered. He took the remote and in a flash, Barney reappeared on screen as if he'd never left. "That's luck for yah."

Krillin eyed Bulma's invention. "You sure it's safe to let Trunks mess around with it?"

Goku tried pulling it out of Trunks' hands but he started wheeping instantly and he quickly released it. "Safe enough for me."

Trunks tinkered with all the bright coloured buttons making strange noises with his mouth as if to imitate a laser. "It's cute in a certain way, I guess," Yamcha said as he watched the toddler aim the object at its surroundings. With the cutest mix between a gargle and a chuckle he aimed it at the four men in the couch.

"How precious," Vegeta muttered as Trunks laughed and smacked the big red button in the middle. A red laser beam hit all four of them and they were instantly covered in a faint red glow.

"His aiming's pretty well, isn't it?" Goku smiled, before the four of them vanished on the spot.

Krillin moaned and pressed a hand against his forehead. "Man, feels like I've been hit by a truck," he muttered and got to his feet. As he observed his almost alarmingly colourful surroundings, he saw Yamcha running by with a shriek.

"Save yourselves!" he cried. "It lives!"

Krillin blinked at him in confusion then turned and gasped.

Vegeta was staggering backwards hands held in front of him and an expression close to fear on his face. "Back! Back I say!"

But the giant fluffy purple dinosaur shuffled forward fearlessly. "Aw," Barney the dinosaur said, "looks like somebody needs a hug!"

Queen Luana: Yeah, so this will be a series of short chapters. Once again I'm all ears if you have any requests. Can't promise I'll grant them, but it won't harm anyone if a good suggestion is made. Just tell me what you think of this little concept.